"Go talk to her. I'll stay here." Angela says as Tony squeezed the steering wheel. His palms were sweaty.
Tony followed her eyes. The young woman was sitting on the swing, she wasn't staring off into the distance any more. Her head hung low, looking at something in her hands. Her shoulders slowly going up and down. She was crying.
"I can't." Tony's voice was soft.
"What do you mean you can't?" Angela sounded annoyed.
"Look at her. She is crying." He kept his eyes on her. "I've made 3 women cry today. First Sam and you.. and now her. And to be honest, what Jonathan said. It got to me."
"I know.. he got to me too."
"Angela?" he looked up at her.
"Yes Tony?"
"Please don't let me do this alone."
"Tony I can't go with you, but I'm here for you. You need to set this straight with her."
"And Sam and you.."
"Not with Sam or me. We already love you, we will forgive you. And we will move on. As a family. Just go and talk to her."
Tony put his hand on the door.
"Oh and Tony?"
He turned to look at her.
"May I read the diary and the letter when we come home?" Angela was nervous asking.
"No more secrets Angela, of course you can." He pecked her on the lips before exiting the car.
Angela watched him walk towards the young lady, she felt as nervous as he did.
He slowly walked up to Christina.
"Christina?" he slowly said.
She didn't move. He could make out she was holding a photo. He saw her caressing the photo with her thumb.
"Christina?" his voice a tad bit louder.
"Please go away Mr. Micellli. I think I've said everything I wanted." Her back still towards him.
"I haven't." He stated.
Christina turned around. Her eyes red from crying. "There is nothing you can say, you've said it all without words." She got up.
Tony quickly put his hand on her shoulder "Please, wait."
"Why?" the anger in her voice was gone, as sadness seeped through.
"Because I want to apologise."
"Why? Because you got caught?" Christina cocked her head.
~She has some mouth on her.~ Tony thought to himself.
"No not just because I got caught. I should have been upfront with my family."
"So why weren't you? Jay knows all about you."
"And your kids?"
"They're 13 and 15 Mr. Micelli. I decided not to tell my teens because they're teens!" her eyes shot fire. "Your family consists of adults! Why didn't you tell them? Am I such an embarrassment to you? Because of the way I look? Where I can from? Who my mother is?"
"Well.. yes and no."
"Oh great. Look Mr. Micelli, let it go. Even if you were my biological father, I don't need a father who is ashamed or embarrassed by me. I've been through enough. And I can't deal with this. So please, live you life, enjoy your wife, your family and forget about me. That's it."
"Listen, come on. Let's sit over there." He pointed to a bench. "Please, just give me 10 minutes. If you still feel the same, we will leave it at that. Okay?" he pleaded.
Christina sighed. "Okay, 10 minutes. Not a second more."
Sitting down Tony patted on the bench, inviting Christina to join him.
"Why don't you ask your wife to come out as well?"
"She said I need to do this myself and she is right." He gave her a weak smile "Look Christina, I'm not embarrassed by you. I guess I'm embarrassed by my past."
Christina looked at him but didn't say a word.
"When I met your mother, both her and I were at the lowest points in our lives. I had just lost my beautiful wife Marie and she had just lost your.. her husband and her son. Grief is what bonded us. Grief is what started us talking, while we talked we forged a bond. We talked so much and we drank even more. In 5 days we had really gotten to know each other. As I told my family, we drank the first 2 days. Then we spend 3 nights together and we said goodbye on the 5th day. The weight of the grief had subsided. And you know both your mother and me knew that this is what it was. We were mourning and we were comfort to each other. We didn't want a relationship, we just needed to feel again. And we did." He looked at Christina, who was looking at the photo in her hand.
"This is mom and me." She handed him the photo. "I was about 10."
"Your hair was a lot darker then." He noticed. "You look like Sam here. Just longer hair and light eyes." He meant it. She was the spitting image. "Your mom looks happy."
"We were. Although she never remarried after my.. her husband. She didn't even date anymore. It was her and me." She had a sad smile on her face as she looked at Angela. "I'm happy you at least got to find love again. She seems nice."
Tony followed her eyes until they rested on Angela. Angela looked back at them and gave a small wave. "She is nice, she is the best. I am so lucky I've found her."
"Look Christina. I was so scared to tell Sam I slept with another woman so quickly after losing her mother. I was embarrassed about my behaviour. And I never knew she got pregnant."
"I know." Christina said.
"I should have been upfront with my family."
"Yes you should have."
"I feel really guilty toward both them and you.'
"As you should."
"It would be nice if you disagree with me."
"You're saying all the right things. No disagreement from me." She gave a small chuckle.
"I see you have my sense of humour." Tony side-eyed her.
Christina raised her eyebrow. "Mom always said I had a weird sense of humour."
He bumped his shoulder into hers.
Tony took the envelope out of his jacket "We still have this to open."
"It's okay. I meant what I said. Go live your life, be happy. I will go on with my family. It's okay. I don't want to be a reminder of your embarrassing past."
"Christina, that's not what I meant. And you are not a reminder of an embarrassing past, not to me. I needed your mother as much as she needed me at that point. I never expressed how grateful I was to her and she never expressed her gratitude to me either. We somehow both knew. And we were content with that. But I have to be honest I did always hope Sam never would have to find out I slept with someone else so soon after her mom's death."
"I know how she feels. When I found the diary and read it. I was so angry at my mother for betraying my father. And then it hit me like a ton of bricks." She looked up at Tony, eyes full of tears "All this time I was honouring and grieving a man I never met, who I thought was my father.. while he wasn't. This just don't add up."
"I just want you to know that I am ashamed of you or what happened between your mom and me. I always embarrassed, but talking to my family and you made me realise that I was just lonely. Grieving.. and, well I needed comfort. I needed to get out of my head."
Christina shrugged but nodded her head in understanding.
"Will you please come with us. Your husband is on his way."
"Jay? Why?" Shock was visible in her face.
"Well I tried you cell phone and as you didn't answer.. I called your hotel room."
"Oh."
"Please?" Tony got up and extended his hand to her as she finally took his.
Angela watched them stroll back to the car. Christina looked tired, sad and worn. She felt sorry for the young woman as she exited the car. In a way she reminded her of Tony. Was it her stride? No that wasn't it. She couldn't put her finger on it.
"Hi." Christina gave her a warm smile "I'm sorry for my first introduction. I'm Christina van Helmond." She extended her hand.
Angela took her hand and placed her left hand over theirs. "Nice to meet you Christina. I am Angela Micelli." Angela loved saying her name and she loved Tony's big smile, when she said it, even more.
"Nice to meet you too Mrs. Micelli. I'm sorry about the circumstances we've met in."
"Don't be sweetheart." Angela smiled.
"Get in ladies, let's go home." Tony slipped into the drivers seat.
The ride to their house was quiet as all of them needed the time to process everything that had just happened.
Angela saw the nervousness on Tony's face. As she put her hand on his thigh and squeeze. He looked at Angela and took her hand in his. Bringing it to his lips and kissing it. Christina watched the scene play out in front of her. She felt a sting of jealousy, she wished she'd grown up with parents who loved each other like that.
"That's a nice car." Angela said.
"It's Jay's." Christina noted.
"So I guess he's here." Tony smiled as he looked at her through the rear view mirror.
She gave him a weak smile back.
They got out of the car, immediately hearing basketball noises.
"Mom!" Alicia ran up to her mother and hugged her then letting her go. "Don't scare us like that!"
Christina cupped her face "I'm sorry baby girl, mommy just needed some time for herself. I am so sorry."
"It's okay mom." She smiled as she turned to Tony and Angela. "Thank you for finding my mom." She smiled as she extended her hand to Angela. "I'm Alicia Johnson, nice to meet you."
"I'm Angela Micelli, nice to meet you too, young lady." She smiled at the girl.
"Mr. Micelli." She nodded to Tony.
"Alicia." He followed her lead.
"Could you call your dad for me? And keep Marcus company playing ball?" Christina placed her hand over her shoulder.
"Well Marcus has someone to play with. Dad too." Alicia laughed. "Come say hi first. Marcus was really worried you know."
They all walked towards the back, everyone was out back. Some were eating and the guys were playing ball.
"Christina!" Jay stopped dribbling "Where were you?"
"I'm sorry you guys had to drive out here. I'm even more sorry I made you worry about me. I just.." she swallowed the tears away "I just needed some time to think about certain things."
Jay immediately knew what she was talking about. "You okay babe?" as he stood in front of his wife.
She nodded yes but her eyes said no.
"So who wants a hamburger?" Brian broke the tension.
"You know what.." Tony smiled "Why don't you give all the kids a burger Brian. We will get some more food and drinks." He winks at Brian, who nods in understanding. "Could all the other adults help?"
"Mr. Johnson, you are coming back out right?" Andy smiled.
"Heck yeah kid.. I'm not done yet." He gave him a big smile.
"He's good!" Jay whispered in Tony's ear.
"That's my boy!" Tony whispered.
Sam touched Christina's shoulder.
"Christina? I'm Samantha, Samantha Micelli." She nervously introduced herself.
"Hi Samantha, I'm Christina van Helmond."
They gave each other an understanding look before following the rest inside.
Jonathan and Jay stood back as Angela, Samantha and Christina sat down. Tony leaned on the arm rest of the chair, next to Angela.
He held up the envelope. "I guess this is why we are all here. I'm not going to open it."
"What?" Samantha said what everyone thought.
"No, I think Christina needs to open this." As he hands her the envelope.
Christina takes a look at the envelope.
"Come on Chris, open it." Jay softly pressures.
She looks up at Tony. "Are you sure?"
"I'm sure honey." It slipped out before he knew it.
Christina looked from Angela, who also nodded to Samantha.
"I'd like to know if I have sister." Samantha smiles.
Christina opens the envelope and sighs before taking its contend out of it. She unfolds the letter and swallows, before looking up at Tony. "99.9%." was all she could say. Her throat felt so thick.
"99.9%? What does that mean?" Tony looks around the room.
"It means that I have a younger sister." Samantha looked at her father.
"What now?" Christina's voice was insecure.
Tony didn't know how to answer.
Jay walked to his wife while everyone sat in silence for a while.
"Come here Chris." As he hugged her tightly. Christina started sobbing.
Angela looked at Tony and then at Samantha and back at Tony. She got up and hugged her husband. "Congrats, you've got another girl." As she kissed him softly.
"I have always been hoping to get a baby sister." Samantha slowly started. "I just hoped I had met her when she was a baby. And secretly always hoped she'd be yours." Samantha pointed at Angela and Tony. "But here we are. I now have a little brother and a little sister. Who are both taller than I am." Samantha chuckled.
Tony walked towards Christina. "May I?" he asked Jay, who let go of his wife.
"So.." Tony started.
"So.." Christina repeated.
"I guess I have another daughter."
"Yeah." She gave faint smile "And I I guess I have a father."
"Yeah." He smiled.
"And a granddaughter and -son." She shyly smiled.
"And a son-in-law!" Jay smacked his shoulder.
"Wait!" Tony's face lit up "Jay Johnson is my son-in-law!"
Samantha got up. "Welcome to the family Christina." As she hugged her
"I am really sorry if I don't seem very enthusiastic. But I am extremely overwhelmed, by all of it. And I don't quite know what this means."
"Well it means you have a whole new family. Your father comes with a wonderful sister and a terrific brother, 2 nephews, 2 nieces and me, a stepmom." Angela smiled.
Christina looked at Angela, she didn't know what to say. "It's just I haven't had a parent since I was 15. My grandmother, bless her soul, she tried, but she wasn't my parent she was my grandmother. I've always depended on me and later on my husband." She gave Jay a loving look. "He was truly my hero."
"So Mr. Mi..?" Christina started but stopped as she had no clue what to call him. "What do I call you?"
"I guess starting off with dad is a bit weird for the both of us."
"Agreed." She immediately stated.
"What about just Tony?"
"I think that's a great start." She smiled "So Tony.. what did my mom tell you in her letter?"
"What a minute.. you haven't opened yours yet." Tony gave her a quizzical look.
"No I haven't. But I am very curious what she told you."
"Angela, could you read the letter aloud?"
Angela opened the envelope and took out the letter:
~~Dear Tony,
I guess when this letter reaches you, I am no longer on this earth and Christina has found the safety deposit box. Probably because I've paid for 25 years in full.
I've held out on telling Christina the truth, she's been through too much. I took me 6 months to tell her I was sick, I should have told her sooner. But I couldn't handle seeing my baby so sad.
I've written her a letter. I hope she does wait reading it until you two have met. She's a wonderful girl, so she probably did wait.
I don't know what to tell you in any other way than this, Christina is your daughter. I've denied it for 10 years, no probably longer. But I couldn't deny it anymore, until I started noticing small things that reminded me of you. She definitely has your sense of humour, her love for sports and cooking. She is an amazing cook at only 15. She gets the love for music from me, her eyes are mine as well, they remind me of her big brother. Now I get what you told me about Samantha. Sometimes when Christina smiles at me with that twinkle in her eyes, I see my little boy and it does hurt, but in a good way. I wish I could have told you this in person, but besides your name and the place you're from I don't know anything. I've always assumed that Simon was Christina's father, especially because she looked so much like her big brother. But I don't think I can deny it any longer. She wasn't born too late, she was born on time.
Tony, I don't regret the week we spend together. I still think about it a lot. You were what I needed at the right time. You made my mourning process easier than it had been for weeks. You made me feel, all kinds of feelings. You've made me laugh harder than I had in weeks. You made me sad.. but then picked me up and made me smile. I am forever in your debt. Not only when I was grieving my husband and son. But you gave me Christina, my reason for living and my reason to face any obstacle coming my way.
I do regret not telling you and even Christina. But I just can't. I can't be leaving this earth and throw that in front of her feet. She is only 15. She can't deal with death and a dad. I hope she won't hold it against me when she does find out.
I've often wondered if Chrissy looks anything like your Sammie. Because the older she gets the less she looks like me. Her eyes are what's left of me.
I hope Christina finds you and is welcomed in your home, which you might even be sharing with a 'new' wife. I hope she will be accepted by Samantha and any other future children.
And if Christina is awkward and shy. She gets that when she is happy and sad at the same time. If you give her a chance, she is the most loving girl ever. She makes me so proud. I am so sad that I never get to see what she'll be doing in the future, if she gets married or if she has children. I'll never be a grandmother, please try to be a great grandfather to them, maybe ask your (future) wife to accept both Christina and her children as her own.
Thank you for all you've done and given me. You will forever be in my thoughts. And Tony.. please take care of my baby girl if she shows up at your doorstep.
Much Love,
Cathy~~
Angela cleared her throat. "Well that was.." she sniffled "Your mother loved you so very much."
Christina was as white as a sheet. "I know."
"Are you okay?" Jay asked.
"No." she looked up at her husband "But I will be." She gave him a smile.
"We all will be." Tony walked up to Christina and opened his arms to her.
For a moment she doubted what to do but she stepped forward and hugged him. "Welcome home." He whispered only she could hear as she hugged him tighter.
"Let's eat." Angela placed her hand on Tony's shoulder.
The entire family walks towards the kitchen.
"So Jay.."
"I'm sure I can hook you up with tickets."
"That wasn't what I was going to ask, but I'll take it!" Tony laughed.
"I wanted to ask if I could be on your team outside."
Jay laughed as he slapped Tony's shoulder.
"Christina?" Samantha's voice was a mere whisper.
"Yes?"
"This is weird isn't it?"
"It is. And I was hoping your dad would have told you about me before I just showed up at your house. It was embarrassing." Christina looked at her feet.
Samantha appreciated her honesty. "Our dad." Samantha smiled. "You have nothing to be embarrassed about, you didn't ask to be born. Dad should be embarrassed."
Christina looked up at her. "No he shouldn't"
Samantha was taken aback by her remark. "You're not angry with your mom for sleeping with another man so shortly after losing her husband and son?"
"Samantha, I was 15 years old when my mother passed. I was 20 when my grandfather passed and my grandmother passed a year later. She was the one family member I had left. I went to a dark place. I would have done everything to get out of that dark place. That's when Jay came back into my life. He had planned visiting me, but came sooner when he heard about my grandmother. The day he arrived I slept with him. I just needed to feel something other than the pain of loss. So I'm sorry I'm not mad at my mother or our father. They needed to feel something other than that pain. And I get it."
Samantha sat down. "You've lost a lot of people."
"Ah.. you grow up fast." She laughed.
"Now I get why your mom said you have dad's sense of humour." Samantha laughed.
"I know it might be harder for you, you feel like your… I mean our dad has betrayed YOUR mother. But it isn't true. She was gone and I am so sorry, but .."
"Dad needed to feel.." Samantha's voice was soft as she starts crying.
"Oh I'm so sorry Samantha." Christina caressed her shoulder "I didn't mean to make you cry."
"It's not you…" she snickered. "I lost my husband 5 years ago. And I've been happy at times. But to be real honest, the pain has consumed me. I get up, I get my boys ready, I go to work, I come home, I cook, I clean.. I just.."
"live like a robot?" Christina finished.
Samantha nodded at her.
"We all mourn our loved ones differently Samantha. When you lost your mom, you were little. You had your dad other family and friends. But now. You were all alone, with two younger boys to take care of, but who took care of you?"
Samantha gave her sad smile as she nodded.
"But you see, look around you. You have a father who loves you and I feel that Mrs. Micelli has been like a mother to you and Jonathan like a brother. You have a loving family. You are not alone. And you don't have to sleep around to feel things. I guess I'm my parent's daughter." Christina chuckled.
"You and your dad jokes." Samantha smiled.
"You mourn on your own terms. But don't stay stuck in there. Should we join the rest of them?" Christina took Samantha's hand.
"Thank you Christina" she smiled genuinely as she raised their hands up higher "I think I will like having a little sister. Even if she is a giant."
Christina laughed.
"How tall are you? And why did you get all the height genes?"
"I'm 1m73." Christina looked at the confused face of Samantha. "Oh I'm sorry 5'8. And I am one of the shortest, my mom was 6'. So I guess your mom was much shorter."
Samantha laughed "Probably. But you're 6 inches taller than I am." She shook her head.
"I'm half Dutch. Don't you know we have the tallest men and the second tallest women in the world?" Christina laughed as they walk outside hand-in-hand.
Tony watched his now 2 girls walk out hand-in-hand, smiling. They looked so different. One dark haired, dark eyes and tiny and one blonde, the second bluest eyes he'd ever seen and tall. He watched Angela on their right as they both turned. He noticed both of them had the same piercing on the same place in their same ear. Angela said something that made both young women laugh and look at him. They also crinkled their nose the same way when they laughed.
He still couldn't believe he had another daughter.
Alicia walked up to him. "Do I call you grandpa from now on?"
"You knew?"
"I know my parents."
"You eavesdropped?"
"Of course, I'm 15." Alicia and Tony laughed.
"You're definitely my grandkid."
"So?" she asked.
"So?"
"Do I call you grandpa? I know Mrs. Micelli isn't my grandmother. I've seen the photos of my grandmother. I have her eyes." Alicia smiled.
"You do." Tony honestly said. "And so does your mom."
Alicia smiled.
"Does your brother know?"
Alicia shook her head. "No, my mom doesn't know I know either."
"I won't tell." Tony whispered.
"I know.. grandpa."
From a distance Christina watched her daughter talk to Tony. Angela followed her eyes.
"You know he's very good with kids." Angela's voice warm and full of love for Tony.
"That's not kid, she is a teen." Angela laughed.
"He's good with those too."
"He is.. " Samantha confirmed "Not only with me, but with Jonathan and our 4 kids as well."
"I feel like I've missed out on a lot with him." Christina said with a sad smile.
Angela gave her a side hug "Then spend the rest of the time making up for that."
"I am still so shocked all of you have been so open to me." Christina leaned into Angela "Don't get me wrong, I am so grateful, it's just.."
"Overwhelming?" Angela softly said.
"Very." Christina looked at Angela. "I've been on my own for so long. I wish I'd known you all sooner."
Angela caressed her back absentmindedly. "Well I have to speak for all of us, that we wished we met you sooner too."
Christina, who was slightly taller than Angela, looked at her and smiled. "My mom always caressed my back when I was stressed or sad. I remember her doing it just before she died." She swallowed her tears away. "She said that someday, someone would caress my back to comfort me and it was her guiding them. So I knew I was home."
Angela bit her lip to prevent her from crying.
"I think this is the moment she spoke of." Christina let a tear fall.
Angela couldn't help but also let a dear fall. "That was beautiful."
"Mom knew. She probably knew that a guy like Tony would one day find an amazing woman."
Tony walked up to them.
"You girls okay here?" he asked as both of them quickly wiped the tears.
"We're fine sweetheart." Angela put her hand on his chest and kissed him. He put his arm around her.
"Have you opened your letter Christina?" Tony cocked his head.
"No." she swallowed "it's in my purse."
"Don't you think you should read it dear?" Angela asked.
"I.. I.. I don't know. It's the one and last thing.. you know she wrote.. her last message to me." Christina looked at the both of them "I don't think I'm ready."
"You'll never be ready." Tony stated. "But it's best to read it around family."
"Do you mind if I read it your living room, alone?"
"Go ahead honey." Angela said.
Christina grabbed her purse and got out the letter. She paced around the living room.
"Chris?" Jay's voice got her out of her trance.
"Hhmmm." She hummed.
"Babe?"
"Yes handsome." She smiled at her husband.
"I heard you were opening your mom's letter." He looked at her hand.
"I can't.." she tapped the letter against her hand. "I'm afraid.."
"Afraid?" he wrapped his arms around her.
She looked up at him, he was much taller than she was. "Yes."
"I thought my beautiful, talented and intelligent wife never got scared."
"Sorry you had to find out this way, but she does." She gave him a smile.
"Want to open it together?" he asked as he kissed her forehead.
"Yes. There is nothing I can't face with you by my side." She smiled. "I love you, you know that? From the first moment I saw you I knew."
"I am that devilishly handsome aren't I?" He joked. "Come on beautiful."
Christina opened the envelope as she started to read the content of the letter. Jay had his arm around her as she read. Tears just flowed.
Tony walked in.
"She okay?" he asked Jay.
"I don't know.." he honestly answered.
"Christina?" Tony nearly whispered her name.
"Beautiful?" Jay whispered.
She looked up at the men. "I'm fine guys. Don't worry."
"We worry Chris." Jay rubbed her back.
"No really I'm fine." She smiled a fake smile.
"You see Christina, I've only just met you. But I've seen that face before. I've been that face before. You're not fine."
Christina cried and smiled at the same time "I am fine. It's just sad. I don't know."
"Do you want to read the letter to us?" Tony blatantly asked.'
She looked at the letter in her hand. "I don't know."
"Just tell us when you're ready." Jay kissed her cheek.
Angela walked in "Is everything okay in here?" she sat down next to Tony as she hooked her arm in his. He looked at his wife.
"I'm always okay if you're here."
Christina smiled at the love between them.
"You okay honey?"
"I am." She smiled at Angela "And I think I am ready to share the letter with the three of you. I do have to translate, as she wrote it in Dutch." She swallowed before she started reading.
My sweet dear Chrissy, my little angel,
I wonder how old you'll be when you read this letter. You're 15 years now. I've paid upfront for 25 years, so you'll be around 40 years old when you find it.
*she read the second paragraph before translating.*
My sweet baby, let me start by apologising. I am sorry. I am so terribly sorry to put you through this. I know you've read my diary, so you know the truth about Tony. Your father. I'm sorry I told you Simon was your father. To be honest it was just easier that way. I would have ..
Christina stopped, thinking. "I'm sorry sometimes mom used phrases that sound so normal in Dutch but are harder to translate."
I would not only have messed up your life. But Samantha's as well. Tony talked so lovingly about his daughter, who I've just realised is your half-sister. I just can't tell you now, I can't deal with the look you would give me. I am afraid you'll think less of me or maybe of him. As we were both mourning the ones we loved the most. I hope you get to meet him one day and his daughter of course. Or maybe he's gotten remarried and has more children. I don't know. But right now, I can't tell you, I want you to remember me for the mom I was, not for the woman who slept with a total stranger when her family had just died. Baby, sweet Christina, I hope you never find out that type of pain. I hope you'll find the perfect man or woman who will love you for the fantastic girl you are. Grandma and grandpa will make sure you'll grow up the right way. We've decided to send you a year to college in New York. Grandma's sister aunt Dora will take you in. You will make this.
Keep practicing your music, keep playing your music and keep cooking. You've got some real talent my sweet girl.
Please thank Tony from me. He gave me the one thing I needed most. He gave me laughter and comfort when I needed it most and he gave me you. And don't let him tell you that you look nothing like him. Maybe not your appearance, but in mannerism, your love of sports and your sense of humour.
The idea that you're reading this as an adult, is so sad. I'm not there. To see you as a grown woman, maybe with kids. I do hope you're happy.
Chrissy, I will be near you, I will not let you go. You are my child, my baby and my stubborn teen. I will tell you this before I leave you.. but remember..
Christina choked up.
But remember this my beautiful girl, every time a someone will caress your back and it reminds you of me. I will be guiding them. I will be there.
Christina looked up Angela who was tearing up.
And when you meet your father, someone there will be doing that. Know that if I approve of them, you will be reminded of our conversation. They are guided by my, I know they'll love you for you and I know you'll start to love them.
Christina looked at Angela. "She knew."
"I guess she did."
Last thing I want you to know my sweet baby girl, I love you. You've meant more to me than words could ever express. You've brought me more joy the last 15 years than I thought I'd ever experience again. Don't ever let anyone take your shine and bring you down. Don't miss me too much, but don't forget about me.
Keep shining my little star.
With all my love,
Mummy.
Christina scrapped her voice, as she let her fingers run over her mother's handwriting. She read the letter again.
When she finally looked up all 3 were watching her. Angela and Tony both in tears. Jay had his arm around his wife. "That was a beautiful letter, beautiful."
"Mom!" Marcus ran in the living room. "Dad!" he stopped dead in his track. "You okay mom?"
"I'm fine honey. I just found a letter from my mother." She smiled.
"Oh." Marcus hugged his mother "And it made you both happy and sad?"
"Yes my smart little man, it did." She kissed his head "So what did you came in here for?"
"Hamburgers for the adults are ready." He smiled "Are you hungry?"
"Yes." She lied "Let's go outside sweetheart."
"Mom?" Andy walked up to Samantha.
"What is it Andy?" She smiled at her eldest.
"I might be crossing some lines, but how does grandpa know Jay Johnson?" he looked at his feet.
"Oh, well.. you see.. he met him in the city."
"Okay, but how did he get him to come out here? Having a barbecue here?" he pointed at the barbecue as he emphasized here.
"You know your granddad.." she smiles "He gets along with everyone and he charms everyone."
Andy laughed and then turned serious again.
"Mom?" as he stared off in the distance.
"Yes honey?"
"You think.. I mean.." he stuttered.
Samantha had never seen her son like this as she followed his stare. When she saw what he was looking at, her eyes grew.
"I think what?" she swallowed hard.
He ran his hand through his hair. "You think I have a shot with her?" as he nodded towards Alicia.
"She is pretty isn't she?" she swallowed again.
"Mom, she is the most beautiful girl I've ever seen."
"I don't think.." She saw the hurt in his eyes. "Honey, you just met her. How much have you talked to her?"
"Not at all.. but mom. She is .."
"She is. But I don't think this will work."
Samantha watched Marcus run inside the house as she was just too late to stop him.
He shot her a hurt look. "Mom.. ouch."
"Sam?" Brian called her.
Thanking her lucky stars for the interruption. "What is it Brian?"
"These hamburgers are done, the kids already had one. Do you want one?" he smiled.
"Oh yeah, sure." Even though her head was running 100 mph, she still is Italian an could always eat.
"Hamburgers!" Tony yelled as he walked out.
Samantha laughed as she hands him the one she just made herself.
"I can't take your Sam. Mangia!" as he gives her back her plate.
Marcus had run down and started playing basketball with the others.
"Jay!" Tony signalled him "Come get your burger."
Christina had followed her son with her eyes and then looked at Tony and Jay.
"Still weird isn't it." Angela whispered in her ear.
She just nods.
"It will get better." Her voice was so kind. "Trust me."
Christina turned around and looked at the woman next to her. "Why are you all so kind to me? It must hurt both Samantha and you."
Angela chewed the inside of her cheek, trying to think of an answer. "Well honestly, yes and no."
"What?" Confusion all over her face.
"I'm not hurt Tony's has another daughter, it happened before he met me. We both have our pasts. It hurt that he thought he had to lie about it. That he thought he had to hide it."
"How long have you two been together for?" Christina smiled.
Angela couldn't help but laugh. "Depends on when you start counting."
Christina gave her a confused look.
"Tony and Sam moved in with us 38 years ago." Angela thought back at the memory. "We finally started dating 31 years ago and next month is our 30th wedding anniversary."
"I'm impressed." She smiled warmly. "You still seemed so much in love."
Angela stared at Tony, as if he felt it, he turned around and gave her his goofy, loving smile. Angela blushed and smiled. "Well, he is the love of my life."
Christina watched their interaction. "It shows."
Angela smiled at Christina. "We've been a loving family for much longer than Tony and I have been. You see, Tony and I denied our feelings for years."
"Why? After 30 years, sparks still fly between you two."
"Thank you. We were both afraid to ruin the friendship we had built over those years."
"Seems like such a waste of precious time."
"No it wasn't." Angela smiled at her. "It was the path Tony and I needed to go, to get to our final destination. But I have to be honest, I don't know how long Jay and you have been together, but he seems just as crazy about you as ever."
"Next month is our 18th wedding anniversary." Christina watched her husband pass Andy. "I'm still crazy about him. He's wonderful."
Angela looked at her "20 years? How old were you when you got married." Shocked at the amount of years.
Christina stifled a laugh. "I am turning 40 this year. I was 21 when we got married. But I knew when I met him, I wanted to be his forever. I met him when I was 18, when I went to college in New York. We broke up when I moved back home to the Netherlands. He finished college 2 years later and he came back. We haven't been apart since."
"Oh I forgot, you're Dutch. Your English is remarkably well."
Christina started talking with a thick Dutch accent. "I could talk like this if you like." As they both laughed. "No seriously, English has been mandatory in school for years and thank heavens, shows never got dubbed. MTV raised me." She cocked her head to Angela giving her a funny look.
That exact look reminded her so much of Tony.
"Dad?" Samantha walked up to Tony.
"Yes sweetheart?" his voice filled with concern.
"I just wanted to tell you that I understand."
"What? What changed?"
Samantha nodded towards Christina who was laughing with Angela.
"Christina?" he asked.
"She's had a hard life, making her a wise woman." Samantha sighed "I know you didn't cheat on mom, but it hurt nonetheless. But, as Christina told me, everyone deals with grief on their own terms. You needed to feel again and not be reminded of mom's death. And me? I turned on survival modus after Hank died. We both chose our own paths. I'm just glad your choice brought us here, to Angela and Jonathan."
"What about Christina?" Tony looked at her, the way she moved reminded him so much of Sam.
"Like I told her, she didn't ask to be born. I don't blame her. She seems so nice dad. She doesn't look very Italian though. Guess her mothers genes were stronger than yours." She laughed.
"Think again, she has the same colour hair as you do. She just dyes it that way."
"No kiddin' dad!" she laughed.
"What?"
Samantha start laughing even louder.
Angela and Christina walk up to them.
"What's so funny?" Angela asked.
"Dad is.." Samantha snickers while tears of laughter stream.
Angela gave Tony a what-did-you-say? Look.
"We were talking about hair colour." Tony stuttered as Samantha laughed again.
Angela smiled at Samantha's giggle, it had been way too long since she had seen her laugh like that. Angela cupped her face. "Let me guess.. my roots?" Samantha started snickering again as she shook her head.
"Let me guess.. I'm not a natural blonde?" Christina smiled as Samantha points at the side of her nose and then at Christina. "He didn't see it.." Christina also started laughing.
"Oh Tony, no.." Angela also started laughing. All 3 were laughing at his expense.
"What? Explain please.." Tony looked innocent enough.
"Guys.." Samantha stopped laughing. "On a more serious note.. I think we need to inform the kids." As she nodded at her son.
The other 3 followed her eyes.
"Who's that?" Christina asked as she watched the young man eye her daughter.
"My son." Sam cringed.
"Oh." Christina said.
"Oh." Angela and Tony said in unison.
"I think you're right." Angela confirmed.
"Oh poor boy." Tony said.
Christina opened her mouth but closed it and shared a look with Samantha.
"Andy, Joey!" Samantha called her boys.
"Alicia, Marcus!" Christina called her kids.
"Livie, Gracie!" Tony called for the girls. "Jonathan, Brian!"
"Kids.." Tony started "I.. we.. uh.."
"We have some news." Christina filled.
"Some unexpected, but happy news." Samantha added.
Angela placed her arms over both women.
The kids surrounded the adults.
"What is it mom?" Both Alicia and Andy asked in unison.
"Well.. it's more grandpa's news.. I guess." Samantha nodded towards Tony.
Tony massaged the back of his neck and then put his arm on Christina's other shoulder. "This here, is Christina van Helmond." Christina smiled shyly.
"Yeah that's my mom." Marcus smiled.
"Yeah buddy, she is." Tony smiled at the boy. "But she is also my daughter." Tony added, shocking 5 of the 6 kids.
"You don't seem very surprised Alicia.." Christina stated. Her daughter turned red.
Christina smiled at her daughter. "I think I can guess how you found out."
Andy looked at his mother. "You knew all along?"
Samantha shrugged "Sorry baby." She mouthed, feeling horrible.
"So.." Joey started "Marcus is my cousin?"
"Yes sweetheart." Angela smiled.
"All right!" Marcus and Joey gave each other a high five.
Olivia looked at Grace. "We finally have a female cousin!" Alicia smiled.
"She is so pretty." Grace said.
"I'm happy with all your reactions kids." Tony said eyeing his eldest grandson "Our family just extended."
Jay softly pinched his wife's shoulder as she looked up to him, she smiled at him.
"Holy shi…" Andy said.
"Language young man!" Samantha warned her son.
"I just realised.." he looked at Jay. "Jay Johson is my fu.. funky uncle!" as he face lit up.
Everyone around them laughed.
"So, there is just one thing left to say.." Angela started as she lovingly smiled at her husband.
"Welcome to the family Christina, Jay, Alicia and Marcus." Tony finished.