Mario crawled up the side of the hill, looking down at the army waiting in front of the castle; they numbered in the thousands. Mario looked over to the side, a glowing plant sitting there beside him.
"A Viagra flower!" he gasped.
Mario grabbed it and shoved it up his anus, he could feel the power.
"Oh hell yeah!" Mario gagged.
His plant penis fused to his body and grew into a mighty glowing saber. Mario leapt down the hill, as the army charged. Bowser looked on from his keep on one of the towers, as Mario began to viciously cut koopas in half with his bulging member. Mario backflipped many times, as though he was Yoda attacking Palpatine, and Bowser retreated into the darkness.
Within minutes the entire army was dead, and Mario came for the first time in days. It began to rain as he ran towards the gates and blew them open with his semen.
The real battle was about to begin.
Back in Bowser's castle, Luigi was lock-picking the lock of his cage using dried semen, Sadly, Bowser had recently been pissed off, and Bowser was coming straight down into the dungeon.
"Get up and eat this!" Bowser yelled.
He slammed Luigi down and the man crushed through his pathetic toilet.
"Down the hatch!" Bowser squealed as he hopped onto the toilet.
Bowser then released an eruption of bloody diarrhea straight into Luigi's face. Noticing Luigi wasn't as sad as he wanted, Bowser stuck a stick in Luigi's mouth to pry it open.
"Eat up!" Bowser released even more bloody diarrhea straight down into Luigi's throat.
Luigi, obviously completely disgusted, proceeded to puke onto the air above him. Bloody diarrhea and puke met mid-air like some Harry Potter bullshit. The entire room exploded with diarrhea in response.