A/N - Hey guys, thank you for being awesome and sorry it took me so long to update, but on the bright side, I finished the rough draft of my thesis, woot! Now I just have to edit it like crazy. Besides, writing this chapter was probably the hardest thus far, not writer's block just. . . struggling to find the right angle. Anyway, on to the good stuff. Enjoy!

Chapter 11

Hikari woke to find herself in her bed again, knowing for sure this time that she had not put herself there. "What time is it?" she mumbled to herself, her voice full of sleep.

"It's about two in the afternoon" someone answered.

"Shit, why didn't you. . .?" Hikari trailed off, seeing Kurama holding up a note in his hands. "Ah" Hikari replied awkwardly, reading the note Kurama handed her.

"Yukina and I were the better for more rest too, so everything is alright" Kurama said comfortingly.

"Fair enough. I'll see you guys in the living room all ready in say. . . an hour?"

"Of course, I will let Yukina know. I think we are both about packed ourselves. I am taking care of caring the food and Yukina has volenteered to carry medical supplies, which leaves. . ."

"Weapons for me. I can handle that. I assume you will be using your rose whip, will you want any other other weapon?"

"I think not. Hmmm. . . perhaps you should bring a few extra throwing knives for me, just in case" Kurama replied.

"I can do that, I will just sharpen a few of my old ones. Do you think Yukina would want any?"

"No" they replied simultaneously. Hikari and Kurama looked at each other with a smile.

"Right. I will bring my katana, bow and arrows, throwing knives, and whatever else I can cook up. You and Yukina will have the best assasin protection that money could have bought you."

"What better protection could we have than an ex assasin gone spirit detective?" Kurama chuckled.

"At your service" Hikari smiled with a mock bow. "Now get out of here so I can pack and change."

"Of course." Kurama made it most of the way to the door before turning back and saying, "Hikari, have you tried. . .?"

Again Hikari cut him off, knowing his question before he finished, "All yesterday while I was playing his keyboard. I thought, I hoped that maybe playing the instrument he poured so much of his soul into would being us closer, but no luck. He has shut my mental link with him good and tight, and he's the telepathy, not me. I can share the mental link with him, but I can't create one."

"I supposed as much, he severed my connection with him as well" Kurama sighed with resignation. "See you in an hour".

When Kurama left Hikari wasted no time. She jumped in the shower, washed, and was out within three minutes. Not knowing when she would get another shower, Hikari felt she should take the opportunity now. Hikari went to her closet, and pushed the general clothes to the side to reach her tracking gear she had been wearing on missions for Koenma. She pulled out underclothing, a black long sleeved tunic, black legging pants, and her black army boots. The material of her clothes was sturdy, but light, and was soft enough to not chafe her skin when running long distances. From a drawer she took out her leather archer's guards and laced them on. After she dressed she brushed her hair and tied it into an efficient braid, figuring the style would keep for awhile without washing. Then Hikari went to the chest in front of her bed and took out her leg and arm knives, and well was the wrap-like sheathes she wore them in. Tying the last of her knives in place, she went to work sharpening three blades for Kurama, beautiful black steel, weighted perfectly for deadly aim. Hikari also grabbed a small dagger from the chest, intending to force Yukina to wear it on her belt in case of emergencies. If she got Yukina killed, Hiei would never forgive her, and she would never forgive herself for letting her best friend die. Best friend, I have a best friend? Huh, who'd have thought. . .

Finished with sharpening the throwing knives, Hikari placed them in a roll up three knife sheath, and tucked it into the side satchel she planned to bring. Since she was in charge of weapons she had to travel light, in order to preserve enough agility to use the weapons she brought. She Picked her lightest katana and tied it onto her belt, and then strapped her quiver securely around her mid section. Draping a cloak around herself and picking up her bow, Hikari headed for the living room, ready for the hunt.

To her surprise, Koenma was waiting in the living room with Kurama and Yukina. One look at everyone and Hikari knew something was wrong, Yukina and Kurama looked nervous. As soon as Hikari walked into sight, Koenma stood up from his chair, an act that might have been intimidating if he was not in his baby form and thus not quite three feet tall. "Hikari, I have been very patient thus far and stayed out of things, but with you intending to go on this. . . search. . . with no way of knowing when you will be back and what will happen, I cannot let you leave until you tell me what you learned during your time captive in Demon City. I have to prepare for whatever is coming and I cannot do that while I know nothing!" Koenma snapped, keeping his temper until the end of his obviously carefully prepared speech.

Hikari closed her eyes, searching for patience for people who only cared about and had vision for their own problems and needs. When she failed to find any she opened her eyes, and in a flash had her hand wrapped around Koenma's throat, pinning him to the wall. She heard gasps behind her but ignored them. Realizing after a moment that he couldn't breathe, she released him, letting Koenma sink to the floor. She hadn't wanted to hurt him, just to. . . get his attention. "Okay, fine" Hikari said in a measured tone. "Yes, an assault on Reikai was being planned, thought to be perfectly honest, someone, somewhere is always planning an assault on Reikai. There were some powerful demons behind this one, a large group of upper A class demons with a variety of talents. However demons are demons, and none of them trusted each other. They got me because I was alone, and tired and careless. If I recall correctly most of those involved where killed upon my rescue. I doubt the group stayed together, they were so distrustful of each other. I can almost guarantee they went their separate ways and are looking for other dissatisfied factions to join. I am sure you can send an agent or two of yours to confirm that. If you feel like waiting, I will happily find that information out for you myself when I return. Satisfied now?"

Sputtering Koenma said, " should throw you into prison for this! I could have you killed for what you just did!"

Hikari crouched down to Koenma's pathetic form and growled icily, "make no mistake, Koenma, though I am one of your Spirit Detectives I will kill you and anyone else who gets between me and finding Hiei. If he is unhurt and comes back with us safely, I would care less what you do to me, I will kill myself in front of you if you want. Until then, I must recommend for your health that you stay the hell away from me because you have no chains I won't break, and when I break them, you will regret it."

Koenma shivered, and only managed to nod. Hikari stood up, turned around, and was surprised to see Kurama and Yukina looking at her with awe. "What?!" Hikari snapped, blushing, "I dated Hiei for crying out loud, do you think I couldn't handle a bad tempered man-baby?"

Yukina snorted with laughter, and Kurama found himself snickering as he imagined Hikari intimidating Hiei by a solid telling off. If anyone could keep him in line, it was her for sure. Koemna's indignance at being called a man-baby was ignored by all as Hikari, Kurama, and Yukina exited the front door and headed for the portal to Makai and their search for Hiei.

"This is fucking damned useless shit, God damnit!" Hikari yelled, slamming her fist into the nearest tree. The shock and pain of the tree slamming back into Hikari's fist was a slight relief to all her frustration. Day three of their search for Hiei was going as miserably as the first two days, even more so because a whole other day had gone by with no sign of Hiei, no hint of his whereabouts. Hikari knew she was pouting, was being a child about the whole thing, but she didn't have the strength to do anything about it. Her body rebelled at so much moving and doing, without rest, the flashbacks, which she had temporarily been relieved of in light of all the drama with Hiei, had begun again in earnest the first night of their search. Makai depressing stormy atmosphere after all the green and life of Genkai's temple also pulled on Hikari's spirits.

Kurama and Yukina were in little better shape. Both demons had been tired and worn at the beginning of the search. The small breaks, relentless searching, and the fear of being attacked weighted heavily on them, as well was the fear that after three days time they might be too late to find a Hiei in one piece.

As if simultaneously decided, everyone unloaded their packs and slid to the ground. Hikari didn't know whether to scream, cry, or kill something. She knew she couldn't sit still, a need to do something filled her like an itch she couldn't scratch, and her agitation would assuridly bring on a new flashback soon. So far she felt she had managed to hide from her two companions that images, smells, sounds, and pain from her weeks of being tortured kept coming to her out of no where, and particularly when she was tired. Hikari did not fool herself into thinking Yukina and Kurama didn't notice anything, but she could easily dismiss their concerns, if brought up, by her concern for Hiei and her feelings of being powerless to help him, which were both true enough. Feeling like she couldn't sit still another minute, Hikari bolted up and muttered something about going to get firewood.

"As long as you leave those here" Yukina said quietly, referring to the collection of knives on Hikari's person. Kurama and Yukina had been brutally true to their world about being attentive to Hikari's self harm and hadn't let her out of their sight when she was armed. Hikari understood their caring, but with the flashbacks and her fear for Hiei, she NEEDED RELIEF! Tell them about the flashbacks, one of her voices of conscious pushed. NO! Now is not the time to appear weak! I can deal with my own shit after, not now! Hikari counted. Now is not about me, its about Hiei and bringing him home. Realizing that Yukina was studying her intently, Hikari tried to relax herself and unstrapped her knives. With a mocking curtsy Hikari said, "As you wish, my lady" and retreated into the woods.

Coming back towards camp after a hard run, and arms fill of firewood, Hikari slowed to a stop as she heard Yukina and Kurama's hushed and urgent whispers. "She can't handle her own emotions right now, none of us can! Do you really think asking her do to that will help anything?"

"If we don't find him, I think we will end up loosing both of them. It's better for her to try than just give up, and honestly we don't have any clues of where to find him. Even Mukuro didn't have any news of Hiei" Kurama sighed. They had sought an audience with Mukuro when the first arrived in Makai. After explaining the situation to her, Mukuro showed genuine and uncharacteristic remorse and worry for her declared heir, and promised she would send word if she heard any helpful news. Though a positive visit, the lack of news had disheartened the searching trio.

"As endearing as it is to see you two talking about me behind my back, it is actually starting to seriously piss me off. Say whatever it is to my damn face" Hikari spat, emerging from the trees with her firewood.

"Hikari-chan-" Yukina began, not really sure what she was planning on saying.

"-is abosolutely right" Kurama finished. "It was wrong of us to talk about plans without you. It was wrong of you to be so damn secretive that you started self-harm instead of trusting us with your pain. You still don't trust us, and to be honest it is hard to trust you to be honest about your limits and abilities right now. So, Yukina and I have a right to be worried. There, now everything is out in the open."

Hikari stared at Kurama, thoroughly surprised by how easily her verbally slapped her while still being so respectful. It was wrong for them to talk about her, but it was wrong for her to give them reason to not trust her. It was her fault. Shit. She slumped to the ground putting her head in her hands. Kurama smiled sadly at her and walked over to sit next to her, Yukina following his lead and settling on her other side.

"I know" Hikari mumbled. "I'm sorry. I have shit to deal with, okay? I. . . I admit that. Just. . . not now, please? Not until we find him. If. . . when" Hikari choked, " when we find him I promise I will put genuine energy into sorting things, okay? I promise" Hikari finished, sinking into herself, hating how weak she felt, and hating that she had just admitted it, and hating that it was so hard to tell people who obviously cared about her that she might not be okay.

"Yukina was suggesting earlier that you use both your link with Hiei and your knowledge of how he feels, to search for him as an empath, not with telepathy. Hiei told me is had been surprised by how easy it was to find your mind after such a long time when we were searching for you. Yukina thought, and I agree that it might be worth trying, that maybe, because of the bond you both shared, and your redeveloping of feelings for each other, you might be able to find him".

Hikari said nothing for a long while, to the point where Kurama was afraid she had not heard him at all. When Kurama touched Hikari's arm gently she flinched, and responded, "Okay, I will look for him. Give me the night to try, and I will let you know what I found in the morning."

"Is there anything we can do to help?" Yukina asked.

"Ummm. . . yea. Build a fire if you can, and keep it going through the night. Also if you could rotate shifts to keep watch that would be great. I don't think I can come back fast enough to help against an ambush of some kind."

"Maybe we should move into the forest, to shelter our position a bit" Kurama suggested.

"Or find a cave of some sort" Yukina offered.

"I think a cave might be a great idea, that way you will only have to guard one side of us vs. all sides" Hikari agreed.

"Then let's get searching, I want you to have as much time as possible to look for him. Actually, if you think you could manage it, and it wouldn't be too degrading, I would happily carry you on my back until we find a cave if you wanted to start looking for him now".

Hikari felt tired already, and was worried that this plan would take a lot of strength, so in spite of her desire to be strong, Hikari said, "Okay, I think that is a good idea."

Hikari strapped on the weapons Yukina had made her discard. Yukina volenteered to carry the bow since Hikari would not have a free hand. Hikari agreed, and was able to manage the other weapons herself. Kurama crouched down and with slight awkwardness Hikari leaned into Kurama, wrapping her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist. She let her heavy head lay on one of his shoulders.

"All set?" Kurama asked.

"Yea" Hikari replied, and without another word, sunk into herself.