Misery Business

Written by: Spirit-the-Titan

Fandom: South Park

Pairings: Stan/Wendy, eventual Stan/Kyle

September 22

(Kyle's POV)

"Alright class, I hope you all brought your cameras today. I'd like for you all to get started on your projects by going around campus and taking pictures that best fit into the criteria. Anyone who forgot their camera or film, come see me and I'll see what I can do," Ms. Kemp explains. Finally, photo has gotten more interesting. I was about to have a heart attack when I thought the whole class would be lectures about photography, given that the first five weeks of school were nothing but.

I grab my camera case from the back of my chair and follow my fellow classmates as we head out the door. Considering that the first project is supposed to represent our daily lives, finding decent things to take pictures of shouldn't be a problem.

After loading my camera and make sure it's on the right settings, I wander out the front entrance of the school, where a few other students are. I look around, trying to find something to shoot. Damn, this might be a little more difficult than I anticipated…

Finally, I decide to take a picture of the school sign. That should be literal enough… I lay flat on my stomach and angle my camera upwards, to get an interesting angle. I take a couple pictures and review them. Not bad, I guess.

Right as I'm about to snap some more, I notice someone with their camera pointed towards me out of the corner of my eye. I glance over just a bit… It's a cute blonde girl. Wait a minute… she looks familiar…

We've caught each other's eyes, and she starts to walk over to me. As I push myself off of the ground, I realize who it is: Annie Polk.

"Hey Kyle," she greets me when she's closer. I can't help but grin ear to ear; I feel like I haven't seen her in ages.

"Hey Annie," I reply, and then I feel embarrassed… "Please don't tell me you're in the same class as I am, and I haven't noticed…" She laughs.

"No, silly! I'm in Photo 3. Photography is kind of my thing," she explains, and I let out a sigh of relief.

"That's cool. Hey uh, were you taking a picture of me?" I ask, a little shyly. She blushes a little, but giggles.

"Yeah, I hope you don't mind. We have a project where we're supposed to study anatomy through photography. You were the only one out here who was doing anything interesting, so I went for it." I grin at my unknown helpfulness.

We stand there for a minute, and I can't help but feel… content. I haven't seen Annie since we had a class together Freshman year, and I saw her frequently because that was the last time Stan dated Wendy. I remember having a crush on her that year, too… It's strange, but I think maybe my feelings for her might still be in there somewhere, under all this bullshit with Stan…

"So I haven't seen you in a long time, you wanna hang out sometime?" she asks, and I'm a little taken aback by her bold move.

"Sure. You know, Kenny joined the band. He has his first show tonight, and we're all going. Maybe you can come with us? I'm sure Wendy will be there too, since she and Stan are back together," I offer, and she smiles brightly.

"That would be great! I don't know if I have a ride, though. Where is it?"

"Don't worry about it, I can pick you up. You still have my number?" I sure hope she does, because I don't want to admit that I erased her from mine…

"Yep! I never delete my contacts."

"Cool. The show starts around six, so just text me when you're ready and I will come get you." I'm a little shocked at how excited I am about this.

"Sounds great! Well, I better get back to class, I think the bell's going to ring. I'll see you tonight," she says sweetly, and runs back into the building. I watch her go, and stand there for another minute. Oh crap, I should get back to class, too.

I somehow always manage to beat Stan to the parking lot. Probably because he and Wendy are sucking face somewhere… Now that's a grotesque thought. I find my little red car parked in the back of the lot, and click it open when I'm in range. Just as I open the back door to throw my things inside, I see Stan running towards me.

"Kyle!" he yells, panting heavily. He stops when he reaches the car to catch his breath. I grin sadistically at his franticness, and slam the door shut.

"Dude, what's the rush?" I ask, still smiling.

"I thought you were going to leave without me! Wendy didn't want to let me go, but she didn't know you were taking me home today. I ran here just in case!" he explains between gasps of air.

"I wasn't going to leave without you," I say, and roll my eyes as he continues to drag out his 'I-just-ran-so-far' charade. "Come on Stan, you weren't even running that hard."

"No, but it was far!"

"Psh, I thought you were an athlete." He ignores my comment and gets into the passenger seat.

"Whatever. You try running from the back of the school all the way to the back of the parking lot when you think you're going to be left behind," he retorts, but I'm over the conversation.

We pull out of the stall and drive to the exit of the parking lot, but there's a line of cars to get out. I'm not surprised; it is a Friday, and we're actually leaving earlier than we do whenever Stan drives. Since he doesn't care about leaving a little later, the school traffic is usually cleared up before we head home.

My thoughts drift to tonight, and what I imagine will happen. I'm not sure what to expect with the band, seeing as how I've never seen a marching band perform on a football field, but Kenny says it will be good. I think about not telling Stan that I invited Annie, and wait to see the look on his face when we show up together, but I decide against it.

"So guess who I invited tonight?" I say, and he looks at me with a confused expression.

"Who?"

"Annie Polk. I ran into her before school got out." He looks even more confused now.

"Really? That's kind of random. Why would you invite her?"

"Well, she suggested we hang out since we haven't seen each other in years, and I just invited her," I explain. I catch a sly grin form on his face.

"Didn't you have a huge crush on her Freshman year?" he asks with a sly tone to match his smile. Oh no… I think I know where he's heading with this…

"Er… yeah, why?"

"Dude! You should totally ask her out! She's really cute, and she's friends with Wendy! I bet she could help set you guys up! Then we could go on double dates and stuff!"

"Dude, no. I'm not going to date her. I mean, I don't even know if I still like her…" This is bad. I can't have Stan getting excited to hook me up with a girl when all I want is to be with him.

"Well then use tonight to find out! What if you do? Will you let us set you guys up?" he asks eagerly, and my heart sinks at how excited he's getting about this…

"I guess," I agree, though I have no plans of letting it happen.

Luckily we're at Stan's house now, and I can kick him out of my car before he can go on about double dates again. He waves, and I tell him I'll see him later. When I get to my house, I rush inside and pull out my phone to call Kenny. It rings a couple times, and he picks up right when I'm securely in my bedroom.

"Sup?"

"Hey Kenny, I have an emergency," I say, using more urgent words than are necessary.

"Oh Christ, what the hell did you do?"

"It's nothing too serious, I just need your opinion. Remember Annie?" He's quiet for a brief second, thinking.

"Yeah, Wendy's cute blonde friend, right?"

"Yeah, her. I kind of invited her to the review tonight."

"What? Why?"

"Doesn't matter. Basically what's going on is I used to like her a few years ago, and now Stan wants to set us up so we can go on double dates with him and Wendy," I explain quickly. Maybe too quickly…

"Hold on, what? You like her? What about Stan? Oh god, PLEASE tell me you're over him!" I grumble at his misunderstood reaction.

"No, you asshole, I still like Stan! I don't know if I still like Annie, but Stan's getting a couple's boner over the thought that I might, and wants Wendy to set us up if I do!" He sighs heavily, probably because I'm asking him for more Stan advice.

"You know this shit isn't my specialty," he says remorsefully.

"Yeah I know, but all I need to know is what you think I should do? I mean, what if I do like Annie?"

"That's the easiest thing you've asked me in months. Dude, if you like her, then fucking date her so you can get over Stan. And then the two of you can fall in love and get married, and have a bunch of cute little curly-haired babies, and your man-crush will never resurface again because you will be too wrapped up in providing for your family. Problem solved."

I'm quiet for a moment as I think about this. It really is that easy. And I don't want to admit it, but if I think I can fall for Annie, then I don't have to worry about Stan…

"Dude, you still there?" Kenny asks after a minute.

"Yeah… You're right Kenny, I guess that's my best option…" I agree reluctantly, and sigh in defeat.

"Thank god," he says exasperatedly. I'm sad that he's so relieved about my decision, but I guess it really is for the best. "You are doing yourself a huge favor, you don't even know."

"I hope you're right, Kenny…" I hear a faint giggle in the background, and then a shush from Kenny. "Are… Are you with a girl?" I ask him.

"Um…yes," he says sheepishly. I'm a little embarrassed that she overheard our conversation.

"Well have you banged her yet?"

"Who?"

"That Amy chick you were with last weekend."

"Pfft, no, this is Kristy. That ship already sailed," he answers in code, but I understand. Oh Kenny, you are such a man-whore.

"Damn, you sure get around fast. Well I guess I'll let you go then, seeing that you're probably doing some 'warming up' before your big show."

"Cool, thanks man."

"See ya."

I flop back onto my bed and ponder my options. If I decide I like Annie, I told Kenny I would go for it in an attempt to get over Stan. It really does seem fool-proof, unless we get together and my feelings for Stan stick around. I couldn't do that to her… Or there's the possibility that my feelings for Stan overpower any I might have for Annie, and I wind up getting nowhere… This is all so complicated.

Lucky for me, I know just the person to help with complicated matters.

"Ike?" I call as I lightly knock on his door. I fidget around with my hands as I wait, nervous about having to go to my little brother for help with my relationship issues. Seconds later, he opens the door.

"Yeah?"

"Uh… I need your advice on something…" I get out, and he stares at me as he waits for my question. "Can I come in?"

He opens his bedroom door wide enough to let me in, and I immediately walk across the room to sit on his bed. It's funny, looking around, that his room is decorated nothing like mine was when I was twelve years old; his is covered in posters you might find in a classroom. But my attention is drawn back to him when he sits next to me on the bed, and the look in his eyes makes me think that he knows this is a serious matter.

"I know you don't really have any experience in relationships, but I know you're good with dishing out advice. And I'm in quite a difficult situation…" I fidget more with my hands as I stare at the floor.

"Well what is the situation?"

"There's this person that I've liked for a really long time, and I can't seem to get over them. I thought they liked me back, but now they're with someone else… And despite that, my feelings are still there. But there's someone else I might like, and I think that if I give in to those feelings, then I can get over the first crush and move on, but I don't know if I can…"

He's silent for a moment as he thinks about it, taking all aspects into consideration. When he finally speaks, my heart skips a beat.

"I think you care about that first person so deeply, that by forcing yourself to like someone else will only hurt everyone involved. From the way you described the situation, you seem reluctant to let go of the feelings you have, and I'm sure rebounding won't change this," he concludes, and I still feel like we've gotten nowhere.

"So… What should I do?"

"Wait it out. If the two of you are meant to be together, then things will work out in your favor. If not, then your feelings should go away in time." I sigh heavily.

"Thanks, Ike, but that's already what I've been doing…" He places his small hand on my shoulder for comfort.

"Then you didn't need my advice at all," he says reassuringly, and smiles. But before I can say anything, I feel my pocket vibrating. I pull out my phone and read my text.

Unknown Number: hey kyle, i'm ready! :)

Perfect, now I have Annie's number in my phone again. I swiftly twist around when I catch Ike trying to sneak a peek at the text, and reply.

Awesome, on my way! I will be there in a few :)

"Who was that?" Ike asks as I leave the room. I smile.

"It's no one… At least, not anymore," I tell him, and he fully understands. He gives me a thumbs-up as I walk out the door.

(Stan's POV)

I find myself in a somewhat crowded parking lot at the North Park High stadium, where Kenny's band thing is. I lock the truck as I head towards the ticket booth, and scan the area for Kyle. I don't see him anywhere yet… Maybe I should text him, in case he hasn't left yet.

dude were R U?

Then I remember he's bringing Annie. I feel a pang in my chest; didn't he want to spend time with just me? He's always complaining about that… And now that I think about it, I really ought to try and make more time for the two of us. I would hate for there to be a repeat of Labor Day… But maybe he thinks I'm bringing Wendy. That would make sense, because knowing him, he would ditch even Kenny to hang out just the two of us. At least, I think he would…

My pocket vibrates, and I open my phone.

Kyle: Your grammar is horrible. I'm right behind you :)

On instinct, I turn around to see if I can spot his curly auburn hair. But… I don't see him. And then my phone vibrates again.

Kyle: You looked, didn't you? XD

I can't help but smile at his lame prank.

yes i did, you ass

"Glad to see you're starting to use some decent grammar," I hear a familiar voice call a moment later, and I turn again. Kyle's there this time, accompanied by a cute blonde girl.

"Hey guys," I greet, and meet them half way.

"Hi Stan!" Annie says, and then she looks puzzled. "Where's Wendy?"

"She couldn't make it. She said she had a load of homework," I explain, and Kyle sighs and rolls his eyes. It looks like I was right.

"Well that's okay, we can have fun just the three of us!" she says cheerfully.

"Let's get our tickets before all the good seats are taken," Kyle says, and leads the way. Even if I want him to get together with Annie, I would give anything for her not to be here right now.

Between the three of us, it cost $15 to get in, and that was with Kenny's 'friend discount'. We wormed our way through the crowded walkways, and find that most of the front row seats are empty. We grabbed our seats and sat through a few shows—learning the hard way that the front row seats are not the best to see the formations—before our band was on. I try to spot Kenny, but everyone looks alike.

I don't pay much attention to the show, since we established that we can't see anything important anyway, but I watch Kyle and Annie from the corner of my eye. They're chatting animatedly, making a silly game of finding Kenny. I really wish Wendy were here, so she could distract me… Or Annie.

When I stop hearing music, I turn my attention back to the field. It's over, and the band is now retreating back to… wherever they came from. In the middle of the lineup I see a hand waving frantically—it's Kenny. I smile and wave back.

"I'm gonna go to the bathroom real quick," I hear Annie tell Kyle. As soon as she's gone, I scoot right next to him.

"Dude, you totally like her," I tell him, and he blushes.

"I do not! Why would you think that?"

"You guys are all chummy and stuff. Even if you don't like her, she definitely likes you."

"So?"

"So hook up with her so we can go on double dates and stuff!" He frowns.

"Is that all you care about? Dude, you know if we went on a double date with those two, it would be them talking and us talking." Well, he has a point there…

"But come on, if you date Annie, then you will by default get to spend more time with me. They are friends, after all," I offer, and he looks like he's thinking about it.

"I can't do that, Stan. I can't ask her to be my girlfriend if I don't want her to be…" He's hiding something, I can tell.

"But… Why are you so against it? You've barely given her a chance."

"Why are you being so pushy about it? If I don't want to date her, then I don't want to date her."

Defeated, I rest my elbows on my knees to prop my head up, and stare blankly at the field. Kyle readjusts himself too, and our knees touch. I think we both notice, but… neither of us move.

"Can I tell you something?" I ask, and his face lights up.

"Go for it."

"I kinda wish Annie wasn't here tonight," I admit, and I see him smile. I wasn't exactly expecting such a happy reaction.

"Me, too. We don't even have Cartman with us; this would have been perfect." I'm not sure what his definition of 'perfect' is, but I silently agree.

We sit there in silence as we watch the next band begin to set up on the field, still barely touching. My face heats up a little… And then when we hear Annie come back, we both jump. We're like a couple of guilty kids.

"There was a huge line… I think most of them were band kids," she explains her long absence, but neither of us reply. I stare at the field, but I catch Kyle glimpse at me.

There are only a few more bands to perform, and when it's all over everyone crowds towards the exits. It takes us a while, but eventually we get to the parking lot and find the area with all the buses. After ten minutes of searching and plenty of "where are you?' texts to Kenny, we find the bus that he's on. He's not able to get off, so he lets down his window to talk to us.

"Hey guys, how was the show?" he asks. He looks sweaty and exhausted. Was it really that much work?

"It was pretty cool. We were trying to find out which one was you the whole time," Kyle replies.

"Haha, I barely caught any of it. Why didn't you tell us those were the worst seats in the house?" I ask him, and he grins.

"Hell if I knew, I've never been to one of these things."

Before any of us could reply, a cute girl dives onto Kenny from the next seat and hugs him. Kenny seems a little shocked by the sudden affection, and sweet-talks her into leaving him alone for the moment. Kyle is snickering next to me.

"Is that Kristy?" he asks. Kenny rolls his eyes.

"No way dude. I already fucked her. Check it out," he starts, and leans outside the window a little so no one inside the bus can hear. "I'm getting so popular in the band, I'm attracting even the non-color guard chicks! Up top!" He concludes his observation by throwing his hand out the window, waiting for me and Kyle to high-five him in his 'triumph'. In order to keep him from whining, we both oblige.

"You are such a slut, Kenny," I tell him, and he smiles widely.

"Well it looks like we're about to head off. I'll see you guys later," he says, and we wave as he closes the window. Moments later, the buses all start pulling out of the lot, just as we make our way to ours.

"You're able to take me home, right?" Annie asks Kyle.

"Of course. It would be dumb if I wasn't."

I walk slightly behind them, feeling like a third wheel. I wonder if this is how Kyle feels when Wendy's around… I'm sure it is. Damn, it sucks. I'm going to have to make it up to him. I hear Annie say something about it being a bit cold and on cue, Kyle wraps his arm around her. It's hesitant, but he did it. Come on, Kyle, just get together with her. Then we can be together all the time…

"Where are you parked?" Kyle asks, turned around in front of me.

"Um, I think it's the next row." We've stopped walking.

"We're parked down here," he says, fishing for his keys in his pocket. Annie is still under his arm.

"Well I guess I'll see you tomorrow or something," I tell him, and he nods.

"Sounds good. I'll text you."

"See ya, dude."

"Bye."

I continue the walk alone to my car and sigh. Even if I'm pushing Kyle to get together with Annie, I'm still hesitant. It's rare that Kyle has a girlfriend, and I always seem to get pushed aside when he does. I can't pretend I don't know that's what I do to him when I'm with Wendy, but I don't like it. But if he dates one of Wendy's friends, then we will get to spend more time together at school, without anyone getting upset…

If I wasn't such a damn people-pleaser, I could just put my own selfish needs first.

And I only have one…