I am soooo sorry that i didnt upload yesterday. i got caught up with other things and i could only start tying this chapter at 9 and finished at about 10 30. and yes, i did miss Rookie Blue :'( but i caught the 12am rerun :)

it was too late for me to go on the computer to upload and my parents told me no :(

so here i is today :) and i hope that i can get you chapter 6 today.

Rookie Blue and its original concepts do not belong to me.

I felt the dull impression of Sam's fingers digging into my flesh. I looked up into his face and wanted to tell him that I'd be fine. But it seemed like too many words to form with my tired mouth.

With and effort, I raised my hand and placed my palm on Sam's cheek. It felt like marble; hard and cold.

My thumb stroked his cheek.

"Sam." I whispered.

And then I collapsed.

My ears were ringing from the sound of the shots. Or maybe I was in shock. I don't know.

It all just happened so fast.

Daffanzo and I were just looking at each other. Not saying anything, not doing anything, just staring.

I don't know what that was all about. But for some reason I couldn't look away from his intense stare.

Just as how I couldn't stop all those images, burned into my brain, from all those years ago from rushing into my head.

I told myself over and over that I was ready to do this. That I was ready to face him again after all those years.

But who was I kidding?

I couldn't do it.

Boyko told me that I could have given the case to someone else. He of course knew about everything that happened.

And me being me, I couldn't give in to the fact that I just wasn't ready. I couldn't admit that Samson Swarek wasn't ready for something. That I couldn't do something.

And that's the reason we were here. That's the reason this happened. That's the reason she's hurt.

I'm the reason she's hurt.

Oh God.

I didn't even see her move to me, shift me out of the range of the gun.

I was still lost in all the images that seeing Daffanzo brought back. I was looking down into her face but not seeing her.

I wasn't until the shots were fired that I was able to snap out of it.

Those four consecutive shots that rang in the large room producing and audible echo.

I watched Andy's face turn sickeningly pale, her pupils dilate, and felt her grip tighten around my upper arm.

In return, a fist death gripped my heart and I couldn't breathe.

She looked up into my face, with an expression as though she was confused, wondering what just happened. I recognized this as shock.

Everything was moving slowly. Or it seemed like it did to me.

I could hear my own heart pound so loud that I'm sure everyone in that room could hear it.

She slowly raised her hand up to my face. Her fingers were so cold. They were like ice.

She opened her mouth to say something, and it came out in whoosh of air, kinda like she was holding her breath for a long time.

"Sam" she had whispered. That one word seemed to convey so much. It was as though she was telling me that she was going to be ok. For me not to worry. Fat chance.

I could also tell that she didn't regret it. The word had enough behind it that it told me that. But it also told me that she was afraid.

I wanted to make that feeling go away so bad. I never wanted her to be afraid. I never wanted her to be hurt.

And yet I caused her to feel both by being foolish and making a decision to save my pride.

And then she was falling. It was her falling wasn't it?

I couldn't tell, but her hands fell away from my arms, her body fell away from mine, and her eyes broke the connection from mine.

I could see the whites of her eyes as they rolled back in her head, and she was on the ground in the next second. I saw her communicator fall to the floor. I didn't hear it though.

I couldn't move. I just stood there watching her lay crumpled on the floor. My vision was fogging and I worked to clear it as I tried to focus on her.

I opened my mouth to say something, but I couldn't. No words came out of my mouth. I didn't utter a single sound.

The room was eerily quiet.

I took a deep breath.

"Andy?" I said. Surprised when I didn't even recognise my own voice.

"Andy?" I repeated, unable to say anything else. I dropped to my knees beside her.

She was lying on her back, her legs folded awkwardly underneath her.

I didn't want to touch her. I didn't want to force myself to find a pulse, to look for a pulse.

I stared down into her pale face. Looked at the shadows her spiky eyelashes were sending across her cheekbones.

On impulse I reached out a shaking hand to brush a strand of her soft hair off her face.

"Andy? Andy?" I couldn't seem to manage to say anything else. The only thing I said was her name. The only thing running through my head was her name. Over and over again like a recording.

"Oh. Well this is inconvenient." The voice startled me and I snatched my hand back from her face.

I slowly tilted my head back to look up at Daffanzo. He was looking at Andy lying on the ground. His voiced sounded bored, but his expression was amused.

I wanted to be mad at him. To do something. But I was still feeling too numb for that.

"I didn't even notice that Royce was conscious again, let alone that he grabbed a gun. I'm... impressed" he drawled in his careless tone. He could have been talking about what he had for lunch for all he cared.

I looked at the man in question. Royce. He was now sitting up, obviously with an effort seeing as how there was a bullet probably wedged in his thigh. He was grinning.

I looked at him, but I didn't see him, because I was looking through a haze of red.

Blindly I reached down towards Andy's holster and pulled out her gun. Without thinking about it, I raised it in Royce's direction.

The grin immediately fell off his face.

Somewhere in the back of my head, a small voice told me not to do this. But this small voice was promptly drowned by the big voice telling me that I should.

I took a deep breath then fired.

Bang!

The bullet landed right over his heart. He jerked once, just as Andy had four times, and fell back. His arms were splayed and his eyes open and glassy staring at the ceiling.

I released the breath I didn't realized I'd been holding. I set the gun down on the floor next to me. I looked down at Andy's unmoving body once again.

God, she was so pale. Had she always been this pale? No, she hadn't.

I knew that there were two other people in the room. Daffanzo and the old man. But right now, I didn't care at all.

I sat cross legged on the floor.

I reached down and pulled Andy's head onto my lap.

"Andy." I whispered softly, stroking her cheeks gently.

"Andy, wake up." I murmured. "Don't do this. Please don't do this to me."

God, there was so much blood. My clothes and hand were soaked in her blood. I all too clearly reminded me of something else.

"I can't do this again. I can't." "Wake up, wake up, wake up," I chanted over and over again.

"Andy, Andy, Andy, Andy, please, please, wake up." I was softly rocking us both back and forth without completely realizing it.

"Andy, do you know how pissed Callaghan is going to be at me if you d-... if you don't wake up" I laughed. Or I tried to, but it came out fairly hysterical.

"And Traci, and Dov, and Chris, and Shaw, and even Gail." "They'll never forgive you for leaving though." "They'll be extremely mad at you. I swear."

I realized that what I was saying was making no sense. I was rambling. On and on, and I couldn't seem to stop myself.

Through all my talking, Andy McNally remained silent.

I held my breath in the attempt to stop my rambling. And a few moments later I let my breath out and bent over to lay my forehead on hers.

"Andy, please don't leave me."

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xoxo thedarkangel22 3