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not beta'd

storyline - Malicious

prompt -steel

I'm in my truck, looking for my phone, when you emerge from the school.

Your stitches have kept you out of the water a little longer than Coach would like, but he understands. And I know you're relieved, anyway.

This can't go on forever, but I've already decided not to badger you anymore. I get it: you're spooked.

I also can't hate you anymore. It's kind of difficult to despise someone who's so contrite. Your eyes shine with something I can't quite place… hope? Apology? You're different than you were and I don't know what to make of it.

My fingers smooth over the glossy finish on my phone. I leave the parking lot before you look over and see me.

It's been a long time since we touched on purpose.

Well, besides the day you almost drowned. That's different, though.

You look down at me, and I look up at you eyebrows raised. "I'm having the team over on Friday night. You're coming, right?"

Frowning, I look away. I feel ambushed, sort of. "Uh… I don't know."

Your silence translates as disappointment, and I'm too sure what to make of the feelings of guilt that wash over me. Guilt for what? For hurting your feelings? For being dismissive of what it is you seem to be going through?

"I'll see, okay?" I amend, pulling away to change out of my suit.

Afterwards, outside, you approach me before can escape in my truck again. "Bella."

"What's up?"

"Is it always going to be like this?" You shift, like you're anxious, or like I make you feel awkward. "You can't stand to be around me, can you?"

Sighing, I toss my stuff in to the bed of my truck. "I don't hate you…anymore."

"So then – "

"Last year was rough. You know that. It's taking me a while to get used to the new version of you. You can't expect me to drop everything just because you decided to not be an ass, or because I saved your life. That's ust… what if those things had never happened? Would you still be s self centered brat?"

You blink slowly, your face falling. "I deserve that."

"Yeah, you do." I open my truck door and then shut it, facing you again. "Just give me time. I want to trust your intentions, but don't. I can't."

"You're the only one who knows."

"Knows what?" I ask.

"What it was like that day. I don't want to talk to anyone else about it."

"So don't."

"Bella." Your face is pained, and suddenly I regret being such a hard ass. Even if you do deserve it, I'm simply not the kind of person who can watch someone else suffer and do nothing. Not even you.

I steel myself and look you dead in the eye, wanting to see if you'll ever allude to what Emmett confided in me last year. "What did I do to you to make you treat me so shitty last year?"

Your hands go in to your pockets, and for the first time ever, you look timid. "I didn't realize it was that shitty till Em called me out on it. That's when – you know. It stopped. I stopped."

"You didn't answer my question."

"Because you frustrate me. Always have and probably always will."

"But why do you care?" I ask, getting frustrated myself.

For a second, you look like you're going to tell me the truth, but then you close your mouth.

I open the door again and climb in, nodding to you before shutting the door. "I'll be there Friday. Just let me know if you want me to bring anything."