*Forgot to mention it a couple chaps back, but you guys have helped me cross another mile-stone. Thanks for all the reviews and the love. There are many things that I love about fan fiction, but the interaction with all of you is one of my favorites. Thanks.
As Donatello rewound a piece of footage, Leonardo took the opportunity to get his true opinion on the Genetic Institute.
"Tell me what you're thinking, Don. I know you can get us in there; it's only a question of timing."
"It's a little more than that," Donatello answered. "Time is going to be an issue, but I'm a little more concerned about the men on the property. We need to go in hands-off, not only because it would be morally wrong to attack them, but because of the risk of discovery. We're going to need several minutes inside the Lab...and that's a long time for this type of operation."
"We need to avoid notice, but shutting off their security sensors isn't an option either, is it?" Leo wondered. "If everything starts failing at once, isn't that a dead giveaway that something weird is going on?"
"If we turned all of them off, yes. But if we focus on one small grid at a time, it probably wouldn't be noticeable, at least, not at first. It's the same tactic we used on Stolle when we went after Raph."
"Except that you'd already cracked his network with your virus, and he figured out that we were there anyway," Leonardo pointed out.
"I didn't say the plan was flawless, Leo. My intentions revolve more around using a particular type of electronic disruptor, a device similar to what Sayuri used to break into HijutoChem in Okinawa."
"And she and Greg got caught too, if you recall," the blue-masked turtle said dryly.
"That was through no fault of the machine," Don protested. "C'mon, Leo, work with me here. I'm still strategizing."
"I know. I'm just trying to point out what could go wrong."
"How about you give me something useful that I can work with?"
Leonardo smiled, despite the sharpness in his brother's tone. "You're up for any challenge, and I know you'll find a way to get us in undetected."
"I'm thinking that the disruptor is the way to go."
"Explain the machine to me. I know it knocks out cell phones-"
"That's what it may have been originally designed for, but it can honestly do a lot more than that, Leo."
"Will it get the job done, Don?"
The purple-masked turtle nodded. "We're going to be taking a hit to our own equipment at the same time though, anything digital, electronic. We'll be operating just as blindly as anyone trying to detect us."
"Does that concern you?"
"I don't enjoy the thought of losing the use of my scanner, our watches and phones, but it's temporary."
"Can you control how wide-spread the electrical knock-out is?"
"The physical proximity of the disruptor with the devices it's interrupting is the key. They have to share a common electromagnetic field. The disruptor knocks out electronics by producing interference on the shared frequency. In essence, the lack of compatibility between the disruptor and the devices in question is what causes them to shut down. It's only effective within the short range of the shared electromagnetic field."
"So that means that we'll be in a consistent state of electrical blindness, the entire time we're inside?"
Donatello shook his head. "Why do you think I've never wanted to use the disruptor in an operation before? In this case, however, I'm already getting the chance to see the lay-out before we go in, and Luke is coming with us. Between the two of us, we ought to be able to find what we need without following a schematic."
Leonardo rested his chin in his hands. "This was Luke's first time in there today. Is he certain we're ready for this?"
"So he says, Leo. We've got the footage along with a couple of override codes to use, thanks to Luke and Marcus. By combining the different angles the two of them took, we even got clear views of several key pad combinations."
"What about the key card?"
"Luke swiped a visitor's pass from the Institute. It's only programmed to work in a couple of places, but with some manipulation, I think I can get it to work in the restricted areas."
"You think you can?"
"We'll be playing this by ear a little bit. Can you accept not knowing exactly what we're doing before we get in there?"
Leo grinned. "Do I have a choice?"
Don shook his head. "We've certainly broken into more difficult spots, Leo. If we weren't trying so hard to avoid human contact, this wouldn't be that difficult."
"Can we actually be ready this quickly?"
Donatello nodded. "As soon as tomorrow, which I'm assuming is what you were hoping for."
Leonardo exhaled. "It would feel good to be doing something. This sitting around is about to drive me out of my mind."
Donatello pushed away from the computer screen. "I know it's a helpless feeling, Leo. I wish..." He broke off, casting a long look at the monitor. "We're used to doing things, Bro. None of us like to sit on the sidelines. But maybe...we should try being there for Mike, instead of just doing things for him, y'know?"
The blue-masked turtle sank further in his chair. "This is my nightmare, Don, we're living it right now. I know how to fight. I know how to plan. I don't know how to encourage Mike."
"Especially since he seems to be dealing with this better than the rest of us are, huh?"
Leonardo fixed his gaze on the floor, and didn't reply.
"Leo, I know it freaked you out that Mike seemed to accept it so easily, but he's not giving up," Donatello told him. "He's doing what he's always done best, which is trying to find the silver lining in a rotten storm cloud. I didn't help matters the other day, and I'm sorry for that. But we're still in this together, and that's the important thing. You don't have to know all the right things to say to him. Just don't try to avoid him."
Leonardo rubbed his throbbing temples. "I had no idea it would be this hard," he admitted. "I thought losing Sensei was the worst thing we could go through, but the thought of losing Mike this way..." He trailed off so that he wouldn't reinforce the emotional response he was feeling.
Donatello nodded. "I understand, Leo, I do."
The blue-masked turtle looked up. "I know this is difficult, but I need you to be straight with me. Do you still feel like this is hopeless, or is there some minuscule belief in the back of your mind that Mike could have a chance?"
"Where there's life, there's always hope, Leo. Until this thing has run it's full course, I'm going to keep trying to beat it. As for whether it will work or not...you know I can't answer that. I haven't seen the research, and I don't know if it's ready to be applied."
The flat tone in the purple-masked turtle's voice disturbed Leonardo more than his tears had the other day.
"Don, I'm sorry," he said suddenly.
His brother's brown eyes focused on him. "For what?"
"For the ungodly amount of pressure that's been heaped on your shoulders. None of us can single-handedly save the world, and we don't expect you to be able to pull miracles out of your shell either. If the worst happens, I hope you can find a way not to blame yourself for it. I've been tough on you, sometimes demanding answers as if you'd try to hide something from us. I've been wrong, Bro, and I'm sorry for making this harder on you."
Donny shook his head. "You don't want anything less than I'd want in your position."
Leonardo wanted to ask him again if he believed in his heart that Mike could make it, but forced himself to refrain. Don's not going to quit on Mike. I just have to figure out the best way to support both of them.
There was a light knock in the Lab door, and Leonardo looked over his shoulder to see Calley. The blond woman ventured inside with a thermos in hand, and offered it to the purple-masked turtle.
"The girls and I decided giving you the whole coffee pot at once would be more time effective than running refills up and down those flights of stairs. Plus this way, it will stay hot for hours," she told him.
Donatello smiled as he took the thermos from her. "Thanks. With you girls around, I'm probably going to forget how to work the coffee maker for myself."
"Jen said she was going to check on you in the next hour or so, and you'd better be ready to eat by then," she said mock-threateningly.
"I will be," he replied. "That should give me enough time to map out our route inside the building, and after a break I can get back to work on the disruptor."
"Tell me you're not building the thing from scratch." Leonardo groaned.
"Define scratch, Leo."
Leonardo shook his head. "Just make sure you get some sleep too."
"I already have a prototype - it only needs some tweaking. Don't worry, Leo. We have time."
Leonardo noticed Calley lingering out of the corner of his eye. "I'll check on your progress later, and we can talk about how we're getting inside."
Donatello gave him a thumbs up, and turned back around in his chair as Leonardo left with Calley.
"Donny seems better," she commented.
"It helps to have something to do," Leo told her. "It makes a difference for all of us. There's nothing worse than sitting around and waiting for the inevitable, powerless."
He avoided Calley's gaze as they descended the stairs, and started to head toward the kitchen. The young woman caught him by the arm, and pulled him back toward the hall.
"Are we ever going to talk about this, Leo?"
The turtle wanted to evade her eyes, but he knew he couldn't continue to do that. "It doesn't help," he said quietly. "I don't think there's anything I could say to encourage you, except what's already been said. We're not giving up on Mike. We're going after a solution, as far-fetched as it might be."
"I understand that much," she said. "What I don't understand is why you won't talk about how you feel with me."
"Calley, it isn't...I'm not...There are things I don't want to say yet, that I don't want to even think about. Talking about it only makes it more real in my mind, and brings back memories like they only happened yesterday."
"Memories of what?"
"Sensei...Our last couple of months with him."
"Is that why you're avoiding this?"
"I'm not trying to avoid it, or you. I'm not ready to go back there, Calley. Talking about Splinter is one thing, but remembering those final days is something else entirely." Leonardo hesitated, and glanced at the door in the Great Room that led outside to the porch. "Come with me," he invited her to follow him. He smiled when he noticed Calley yank a blanket off the couch as they crossed the room, and she tossed it at his shell.
"The last thing you need is to get all cold again," she remarked.
Leonardo sat down on one of the built-in benches on the deck, drawing the blanket firmly over his chest. The night air wasn't quite cold enough to see his breath, but it still wasn't comfortable to be exposed.
"What are you avoiding about the end of things with Splinter?" she asked.
"We had several months of warning leading up to Sensei's death. We knew it was coming, and I thought we were more prepared for it than we actually were. There were a few days when I didn't know if we were going to make it, Calley."
Her dark brown eyes gazed at him imploringly, but she didn't say anything.
"You could say that it was hard on all of us," Leonardo continued. "But Donny...he retreated to this awful place that still scares me to think about. Seeing how he reacted after finding out about Mike...I don't know what it would do to Don, but it wouldn't be good."
"But you made it," she pointed out. "Even though it felt like you wouldn't. I don't want to imagine what it would be like to lose Mikey either, but I still know something about your family. None of you abandon each other, and no one is allowed to descend into a dark pit by themselves. You never stopped reaching out to Donny, did you? Something must have worked, because he came back to himself."
Leonardo nodded slowly. "I've always known that this...what the four of us have together couldn't last forever. But I'm not ready for the separation yet. I'm not ready to do this again."
The blue-masked turtle lowered his head as tears came to his eyes. Her arm searched for him underneath the blanket, until her fingers hooked around his wrist. Calley didn't speak, but rested silently against his side until Leonardo drew both arms around her.
"Do you have any sense about this, Calley?"
"Intuition, you mean?" she murmured. "I can't pretend to have some vision of the future, Leo. I wish I could see it, and tell you that everything will be all right. What I feel right now is that there's still some kind of plan involved, even if we don't understand it. I don't believe this is the end...and you don't either."
He shook his head. "If we start accepting that, we might actually fall apart. I'd rather focus on the interesting task of raiding the Genetic Institute. It has to be beat waiting around here."