I don't own Teen Wolf.
Cut Out All the Ropes: Chapter 2
"Come on buddy, time to get up," Steve Stilinski whispered, crouching down next to Stiles' bed as he rubbed his back. Stiles whimpered, rolling over away from his dad. "No, come on. I need you to take this."
"What is it?" Stiles asked, his eyes still shut.
"I called Dr. Warner last night when you went to talk to Derek. I told him you'd have to stop taking the Adderall for a while. I explained the situation to him and he agreed that you'd need to stop taking it. But he said if you just cut it off cold Turkey it would probably put you in withdrawal considering how long you've been taking it. This isn't quite as strong as Adderall, but it'll hopefully prevent most of the withdrawal symptoms and still help you focus some. It's what they normally give little kids who aren't old enough for Adderall. Now come on, sit up and take it." Stiles sighed, sitting up slightly and swallowed the pill his father gave him. He ran a hand through his hair before meeting his dad's eyes.
"Thanks," he whispered, and his dad nodded, knowing that he wasn't just talking about the pills.
"No problem. Did you get much sleep last night?" Steve asked, running a hand up and down Stiles' arm. "You look like you've been crying. What did Derek say?" Stiles sighed, looking away.
"He said he'd help, that he wanted to be in the baby's life. But he didn't really want much to do with me other than I'm carrying the baby. Which, I mean, I wasn't expecting much from him, but I didn't think he'd be so against me. I don't know…I just thought…"
"It's okay," Steve whispered, pulling Stiles close to him.
"I just…Derek was the only guy who's ever really noticed me, you know? I mean Scott and Danny and Jackson notice me, but Derek really got it. Or at least for a while he did. He knew when I was upset or when I was happy or when I knew something I just didn't want to share. He's stood up for me in a lot of situations and now all that's changed. I just thought…I don't know."
"Do you want me to talk to him?" Steve asked.
"What? No! That'll just make it worse! He already resents me, I don't need you making it more awkward, Dad…"
"Okay…okay. I'll call Dr. Jeffers and try to get you a initial check up here pretty soon. She's dealt with most of the male pregnancy cases in town."
"Okay…" Stiles whispered, letting his head fall in his hands.
"She'll just look you over, just make sure everything's okay. Probably start you on some prenatal vitamins. She'll tell you all about what to expect." Stiles nodded, his head throbbing. His stomach clinched tightly as his dad kept talking. "What do you want for dinner tonight?"
At the mention of food, Stiles jumped off his bed running for the bathroom. Steve cursed under his breath as he followed his son, wrinkling his nose as he heard Stiles retching in the bathroom. Stiles had a hand around his stomach as he kneeled in front of the toilet, his eye clinched shut and tear running down his face.
"Okay, how about we don't talk about food? How's that sound? Take a shower. Get cleaned up. You've got school." Stiles groaned but nodded, slowly climbing to his feet.
"Maybe you should go see a doctor, Stiles," Scott said at lunch, staring at his best friend with a worried glance. Stiles glanced up at him, letting his fork fall back down on his try. He took a small sip of water, raising a brow at his best friend. "You're throwing up all the time and you still smell weird. You smell like something's off about you. And you've been really quiet, and Stiles you're never quiet." Stiles snorted, glaring at his best friend.
"We're just worried about you, Stiles," Allison whispered, reaching out to take his hand. Scott waved his arms over his head as if to point out that was what he'd been saying in the first place.
"Because if there's something wrong with you, then the packs off kilter. You're part of our pack and we're worried about you," Lydia said giving Stiles a small smile. "If you know something, you need to tell us."
Stiles stared at the table for a while, repeatedly letting out shuttering breaths. His hands shook so he locked them together under the table. He rocked back and forth a couple times before looking up at his pack. Even Jackson and Danny had stopped eating to look at him. Finally Stiles let out a sigh.
"I'm pregnant," Stiles said quietly. Jackson dropped his water bottle, Danny cursing while the water poured in his lap.
"What?" Scott said, his eyes wide while he stared at Stiles who still hadn't looked up. Lydia reached out and wrapped her arm around Stiles'.
"I told you I had the gene," Stiles whispered to Scott who sputtered.
"Yeah, but who?" He glanced at Danny who shook his head.
"Why do you assume it's me because I'm gay and Stiles is knocked up?" Danny mumbled and Jackson elbowed him in the ribs. Jackson studied Stiles' face for a moment before nodding.
"I'm just going to go to class early," Stiles mumbled, pulling away from Lydia and climbing to his feet.
"I'll go with you," Jackson said, picking up his tray and throwing his bookbag over his shoulder. Stiles sighed but nodded, leading the way and ignoring Scott when he called after him that they weren't done talking.
"It's Derek, isn't it?" Jackson asked as they sat in the back of the econ room. Stiles let out a shaky breath glancing away.
"Yeah," he whispered, wrapping his arms around his stomach.
"Does he know?" Jackson asked and Stiles whipped at his eyes but nodded.
"He said he'd help with the baby and that he'd claim it. But he doesn't want anything to do with me." Jackson raised an eyebrow.
"Do you want him to want something to do with you?" Jackson asked quietly and Stiles let out a hysterical laugh while he shrugged.
"I don't know. Yeah? I don't…I didn't think this would happen. I never expected him to stick around after Peter died and then when he did I never knew how to make a move on him. And now…Now I'm pregnant with his baby and I don't know what to say to him to make him want me."
Jackson sighed, reaching out a shaky hand and rubbed Stiles back as the teen took a deep breath.
"I don't know what I'm doing?" Stiles whispered. "And I don't understand why you're being so nice to me."
"You're pack, Stiles," Jackson whispered. "You're pack and that makes you important. And we'll be with you every step of the way, okay?" Stiles nodded, rubbing at his eyes some more.
"Stupid hormones," he mumbled and Jackson snorted, shaking his head.
"I still can't believe you made a baby on my bed. Ew," Jackson said and Stiles let out a laugh, smirking at Jackson.
Stiles stood beside his Jeep, gazing up at Derek's apartment. He knew Derek knew he was out there, but Stiles could convince himself to go up the stairs. He'd finally been able to keep something down for the first time in days after school, but his head was still killing him. He'd gotten to thinking about Derek again the night before and had ended up crying himself to sleep. Again.
Finally, after ten minutes of giving himself a silent pep talk, Stiles opened the exterior door to the Derek's stairway and started walking up stairs. They seemed never ending and he felt a little dizzy when he got to the top. He hesitated before knocking, chewing on his lip when Derek threw the door open.
The two boys stared at each other for a moment, Derek with an eyebrow raised. Stiles liked his lips, letting out a shaky breath.
"Can I come in?" he asked quietly and Derek sighed, taking a step backward while he let Stiles past. Derek looked out the door before shutting it, rubbing at his eyes again.
"What?" Derek said after a few moments of silence and Stiles sighed.
"My dad made me an appointment with Dr. Jeffers," Stiles said quietly. "It's on the tenth after school. That's a Thursday, I think. My appointments at…At 4? Yeah, 4:00. I mean, it's not going to be anything too important. She's just going to check and make sure everything's okay and maybe tell me a due date."
Derek nodded, sitting on a backward chair at his small kitchen table.
"And…And I stopped taking the Adderall, in case you were wondering or concerned. Doctor…," Stiles cleared his throat, squeezing his own knees as his feet jumped. "Dr. Warned, my normal doctor agreed it was best for the baby. But he said that if I just cut off the Adderall cold turkey I'd probably go through all kinds of crazy withdrawal symptoms since I've been on it since I was twelve when my…When my mom died. So um, he started me on Clon…something that starts with Clon. But it's safe for the baby since it's used on little kids with ADD."
Derek nodded again, watching Stiles fidget. Stiles let out a shaky breath.
"He, I mean Doctor Warner, said it'd help keep me through going through withdrawal since Adderall is a controlled substance, but I'm calling bullshit to be honest," Stiles said, his eyes still low. Derek raised a brow at him. "I mean, I know it could be worse. But I constantly have a headache and I feel like I'm crawling out of my skin, you know? That on top of morning sickness, which by the way, doesn't only happen in the morning, it's just…I don't know what I'm doing."
Derek still didn't say anything and Stiles sat back, wrapping his arms around his stomach. Stiles repeatedly glanced at Derek who continued to stare at a spot on the wall. Finally the teen cleared his throat.
"Can you say something?" he whispered quietly. "Please?" he added when Derek raised a brow.
"I don't know what you expect me to say," Derek asked, crossing his arms. "You never thought it was important to tell me you've got the gene before now?"
"I…I didn't think it was important. I mean I never expected to…To sleep with you."
"And you didn't think it was important to tell me that night? Huh? You didn't think it was important to tell me right before I fucked you?" Stiles flinched.
"I was drunk," Stiles whispered. "I didn't even know it was you until you flat out told me it was you. I thought you were Danny. And who has sex in 2012 period without wearing a condom?" Derek eyes flashed red and Stiles sighed.
"Just go home, Stiles," Derek said, pinching the bridge of his nose. "We both know you don't want to be here, and I can say I don't want you here either. Just go. I'll be there on the tenth if that's what you're worried about. I'll be there if you want me to be there. I'll meet you the school. But don't make this out to be more than the baby, because it's not. As long as you're not doing anything to hurt the baby, I don't care what you're doing. So go home. Just go home."
Stiles nodded, climbing slowly to his feet. He pulled his jacket tighter around himself, hesitating when he got to the door.
"I know this isn't ideal," Stiles whispered, but he knew the werewolf could hear him. "At this point, you're about the last person I would have chosen to raise a child with. But it's too late for that now, okay Derek? So can we please put all our problems behind us and at least try to be civil to each other? Please?" Stiles bit his tongue, stifling his whimper when Derek's eyes turned red. "Forget it. I'll see you on the tenth."
Derek stared at the closed door for a long time after Stiles left. He could feel his wolf scratching at the surface, whining to go after his mate. It was getting harder to keep the wolf at bay; mating was something that every wolf goes through. And maybe Derek had thought that maybe it was never going to happen to him. He'd been convinced that he'd gone through too much grief in his 23 years and having a mate would just bring him more.
And it wasn't like Derek wasn't excited about having a baby. He'd always wanted a couple of pups of his own. He'd be the second youngest so he never really got to spend much time younger wolves. But after his family was killed he'd wanted to build up his pack not only with those who had been bitten, but also his own family. And it wasn't that Stiles was the one that was carrying his pup that was bothering him. He could picture their kid, a brown eyed hyperactive pup running around the grounds of the house he was rebuilding. And he could see having tons of more kids with Stiles, too.
But what was bothering Derek was that he was damaged goods. He'd been Stiles' age when he had fallen in love with Kate. And it had been nine months later when Kate had betrayed him and killed his whole family before taking off. And four years later his sister had been killed by their own uncle. His uncle who had tried to kill him, who'd tried to make his own pack and by proxy put Derek right into the hands of the Argent's. Again.
He was the creepy man who lived in the burnt out shell of his family's house. He was the creepy man who relied on teenagers to help him. He hadn't smiled, hadn't laughed a real laugh in years and he was sure that if he did now he'd crack. He was broken and there was no denying it. And everything he touched broke, too.
The only reason he had a pack so big now was because they loved each other; but he didn't believe that any of them loved him. Scott submitted to him by default, his own Alpha having been killed. Lydia was in the same boat. Jackson, Isaac, Erica, Boyd-they were all loyal to him because he bit them. He'd made them tons of promises that he still wasn't sure he could keep. Danny was in the pack because of his loyalty to Jackson, but Derek knew he could leave at any time. Allison was there because of Scott. And Stiles? Well Derek knew that he was really there for Scott. And Lydia. And maybe even Jackson at times. But he'd have to be stupid to know that Stiles was there for him, too. That even before that night at a party at Jackson's that he'd never even been invited to, Derek knew Stiles cared about him. And that was something that Derek just couldn't have.
Stiles couldn't care about him because Stiles was already kind of broken, too. Sometimes when Derek would do his rounds and check everyone's houses at night, Derek would stand outside the Sheriff's son's window and listen to the boy whimper for his mother, trapped in his own nightmares. And sometimes Derek would catch the heartbroken look on the boy's face when Scott would ditch him for Allison, again. Derek could count on both hands the number of times Scott had let Stiles down and each one of those times could have led to Stiles dying. Even though they were pack now, Derek still caught all the times Jackson said something hurtful to Stiles and it took a long time for Derek to get that hurt look out of his face. And he hated the way Stiles beat himself up every time he disappointed his dad; most of the time he was trying to do something to save the pack but it's not like the Sheriff knew that.
And because Stiles was already kind of broken, too, Derek knew he had to push him away. Everything Derek touch, broke. He knew that by now. And since Stiles was already a little broken, Derek couldn't get attached. He couldn't let Stiles in. Because if he was already a little broken, it would be that much easier for Derek to shatter him completely and Derek couldn't do that to him. So Derek would keep his distance and do what he could to be in his child's life. And he'd deal with his wolf as best as he could. Even if it growled at him constantly.
Derek stood next to his car with his sunglasses on, his hands in his pockets. He barley contained a flinch when the school bell his over sensitive ears. He watched as students piled out of the school, Jackson and Danny nodding at him as they made their way to Jackson's Porsche. Allison gave him a friendly smile as she made her way to her car and surprisingly Scott kept his thoughts to himself for once. Derek sighed when Stiles finally exited the school, only tripping slightly as he made his way down the stairs. He hesitated in front of Derek, biting his lip. Derek nodded at his Camaro and Stiles nodded, climbing in the passenger seat.
"How was school?" Derek asked as he shifted into second as they sped down Sterns Ave. Stiles looked out the passenger window before glancing back to the werewolf in the drive seat.
"Really?" he deadpanned, and Derek hated the tired look in his eyes. "You've been an ass to me for almost two months now, and you just want to make casual conversation now?"
"Forget it," Derek sighed, down shifting as he pulled up to a spotlight. Stiles sighed and turned his head to look back out the window. Derek noticed how the teen idly ran a hand over his still flat stomach and he wondered where his mind was. They pulled into the parking lot of the doctor's office and Steve was waiting by his cruiser.
"Derek," he said with a nod. Steve took Stiles arm and led him inside. The three men sat in the waiting room, Steve on Stiles' left and Derek on his right. Stiles fidgeted and Steve looked at him with concern.
"You still feel like you're crawling out of your skin?" he whispered and Derek's ears perked up. "It's been over a week, it should be out of your system by now."
"No, I'm fine. I'm fine. It stopped Friday maybe? I'm just nervous." Stiles gave his dad a small smile, his legs twitching. Derek sat back with his head leaning up against the wall. After a long wait, a door finally opened.
"Genim Stilinski?" the nurse said, and Stiles flinched, glaring at his dad.
"They asked for your legal name on the paperwork," Steve said with a grin, his hand on Stiles' arm. Derek snorted and followed the father and son.
"Okay, Genim," Dr. Jeffers said and Stiles flinched again.
"I go by Stiles," he said quietly and the doctor smiled.
"Got it. I'll mark that down. Now, can I get you to change into this gown for me? Then we'll do a little exam just to confirm the home test you took and make sure everything looks good."
"O… Okay," Stiles mumbled, pulling off his shirt and putting the gown on before pulling off his pants. The doctor gestured for the table with stirrups and Stiles gulped before climbing onto the table. He positioned himself as Dr. Jeffers asked. He could feel his cheeks heat up as Derek and his Dad moved behind his head.
"Now, this instrument will show us an up close and personal view of your uterus and your baby. It'll give us a good idea of a due date." It took Stiles a moment before he realized where she was going to stick the little wand she had in her hand but when he got it, his cheeks got even redder.
"Okay," he whispered.
"This might be a little uncomfortable, but try not to tense up too much, okay?" Stiles wanted to make some comment about taking something much bigger than that little wand up his ass before, but he kept his mouth shut realizing that no one in the room would find it funny. He shifted as she turned on the little screen next to him and pushed the wand into position. Stiles whimpered but kept his eyes on the screen.
"Right there," Dr. Jeffers said, taping the screen. "Right there's your baby. I'd guess a due date around July 16th, give or take. Everything looks good with baby and Daddy. Have you been having much morning sickness?" She glanced at Derek but it was the Sheriff that answered.
"Only every day until about three in the afternoon."
"That's to be expected. I'm going to right you a prescription for something to help with the morning sickness along with some prenatal vitamins. Obviously now alcohol, now smoking, limit your caffeine. I've heard you've already cut out the Adderall consumption which is good. I'll send you home some reading on what to expect. And I'll give you my number in case you have any other questions. Do you have anything for me right now, Stiles?"
"I, uh, no," Stiles said, sitting up when she patted his leg. "I don't think I have any questions."
"How risky is this?" Derek asked from the corner and everyone looked at him. "I mean the chances of him miscarrying? The chances of something happening to Stiles, too?"
"The chances are the same as with a woman. I'd keep the risky business to a minimum, especially until the first trimester passes." Stiles nodded, reaching for his pants. Dr. Jeffers handed the prescriptions off to Steve and the three men left the office. They paused in the parking lot, Steve glancing back and forth between Derek and Stiles. Stiles finally bit his lip and stepped forward.
"Thanks…Thanks for coming today," he whispered. Derek nodded, shaking hands with the Sheriff before turning and making his way to his car.
"Well…" Stiles said, turning to his dad. "At least he came?" Steve snorted.
"Come on. Let's go home."
AN: I hope you guys liked it! Thanks for all the support already on this story! Please review!