"Sanguine?"

There ain't no way I could fall for Valkyrie Cain (of all people!). No way in Hell. Nope.

"Sanguine!"

I don't even think she's that pretty! And we hate each other. I still need to kill her.

"Sanguine!"

Suddenly I was slapped.

"God, what was that for?" I shouted.

"I've been trying to talk to you for the past five minutes, but you were too stupid to realize it." Valkyrie brought back her hand from my face.

"Oh, pardon me, princess."

Valkyrie rolled her eyes and put her head on the kitchen table. "Where is Skulduggery?" she groaned into her arm.

We waited around for Funny Bones for a while longer. Finally, the front door burst open and Funny Bones came stridin' into the kitchen.

"You are going to put a dent in the wall if you keep opening the door like that, Skulduggery."

He shrugged. "Gordon won't mind. Besides, I must continue with my grand entrances. If you won't allow me to enter through window..." He sat down at the table next to me. "All right, you have two options. Option Number 1: go to the Temple and help out Ghastly, since there was another murder. The second option: go to Finbar and see if you can get him to find Scarab. We received a report from an anonymous source that he had managed to jet off to Germany this morning, so a few are looking into it."

"Why would my daddy go to Germany? Get 'em to start up World War III?"

"Could be, Sanguine."

"Do you believe this report, though?" Valkyrie asked.

Funny Bones shook his head and said simply, "They had very poor grammar and spelling. I refuse to take anything or anyone seriously when they confuse the yours."

Valkyrie nodded and laughed. "Well I'll go see Finbar, and you can take Sanguine and go help out Ghastly."

She jumped up and tried runnin' but Funny Bones was chucklin' which made her stop.

"Oh, no, you take Sanguine," he said happily.

"Why? Why must I always be stuck with him? I hate him."

"Right here, Valkyrie…"

"Shut up."

Funny Bones sighed and got up himself. "I have to go. The options I presented were only for you two."

"Don't tell me what to do!" Valkyrie suddenly cried, roundin' on him.

Funny Bones didn't seem phased. His skull tilted to the right by a few degrees and he quietly muttered, "I'm sorry. I didn't that I was doing that."

Valkyrie hesitated. She sighed eventually, "It's okay. I'm sorry." She sighed again. "But just…what is it that you're doing where I can't come too? Why can't I know, Skulduggery? We're partners, right?"

"We are, Valkyrie. We are. I'm really just going off to further investigate these Necromancer deaths. I'm not really getting anywhere, and it's incredibly boring, to honestly tell you. You're not missing anything important. Well, you're missing my amazing skills at everything, but other than that, nothing."

Valkyrie rolled her eyes and shrugged. "All right, have fun with that, Skulduggery. Come on Sanguine. Let's get going."

She grabbed a ring of keys from the counter and waved halfheartedly to Funny Bones. I followed Valkyrie as she strolled from the house to her Mustang; I didn't want to lag behind and face her wrath.

"So who's Finbar?" I asked when we had gotten into the car.

"He's a Seer," she answered shortly. "Skulduggery and I have known him for a while. He helped us find the gate to the Faceless Ones all those years ago."

I laughed. "Those were fun times, li'l darlin'. You were just a tiny little brat then, but now you're a grown brat. How things change, huh?"

She rolled her eyes and sped up the car, not sayin' anythin'.

"So…why the sudden hate for Funny Bones?"

"I don't hate him, shut up." Her eyes slid to my own for a second. "I'm just angry he's always forcing me with you and going off to do something. He may be out investigating the deaths, but that's not it. I know he's keeping something from me; I just don't know what."

"Are you losin' trust in him?"

"Of course not. I will always count on him to be there for me. I've got him and he's got me. Simple."

"But what about that Darquesse thing you got goin'? Skulduggery Pleasant gonna stand by his precious Valkyrie Cain when she's a cold-blooded killer bent on destroyin' the world?"

"You make Darquesse sound so evil," she muttered. "And we've talked about it. We know what to do when that time, um…comes along."

"And you hopin' it never ever does?"

"No, Sanguine. I want to completely annihilate the human race. That's always been my life goal."

"No need to get snippy, li'l darlin'."

She growled lowly and turned a corner. We got to a rundown tattoo parlor after a few more minutes. The lights were on, but no one was near the place.

"This is it?"

"Finbar Wrong's place, yeah."

Valkyrie entered the shop first, the bell on the door ringin' as the old door swung open.

"Heeey!" a voice called out

"Hi Finbar!" Valkyrie responded.

"Val!" Loud footsteps sounded from above. A minute later, a skinny little guy with pierces and tattoos everywhere on him came down some stairs. A young boy with the same coloring as the man followed behind him.

"Who's your friend?" Finbar Wrong asked, gesturin' to me. "He looks familiar."

"Billy-Ray Sanguine," I said.

"He's a convicted criminal serving time in the prison, but they came up with this new program to help criminals catch other criminals still on the loose," Valkyrie explained. "So far he's being good, except for the constant whining."

I glared. "When have I whined, li'l darlin'?"

Valkyrie waved me away. "Hey there, Marty. How's it going?"

The little boy, Marty, shrugged. "Okay, I guess."

"Awesome. How's school this year?"

Again, he shrugged. "Okay, I guess."

Finbar smiled wide and clapped a hand on Marty's shoulder. "We're doing good, Val. How's it for you?"

"Everything was fine until Sanguine came along."

"Wow! So much hate for me!"

Finbar laughed. "What is it you need? Something of Skul-man's?"

"We need you to find someone, actually."

He nodded and directed his kid to head upstairs. When he had disappeared, Finbar ran to a cabinet and pulled out a sharp knife and a map of Ireland. He spread the map on the table in front of him and gripped the knife tightly.

"Who we gonna find today?"

"Dreylan Scarab."

He nodded and sat down on a stool. I don't really know what happened next, but suddenly his eyes grew huge and wide and blank. Valkyrie crossed her arms and kept a straight gaze on Finbar. He mumbled a few things, but then whispered, "I don't even know, Val…"

"Finbar? Can you hear me?"

"Yeah, loud and clear."

"Can you find Dreylan Scarab?"

He shook his head slowly and suddenly the knife behind him. It skidded across the floor and hit a cabinet. Finbar blinked a little bit and then focused on Valkyrie. "I could feel him, Val. But I don't know where he is totally. He's not in Ireland."

"Could you try Germany?"

"Nah, I don't have that kind of range right now. I can try again for you in a bit, though."

Valkyrie smiled. "That's okay, Finbar. But thank you, though. I appreciate it." She tried to not show her disappointment.

He got up and gestured to his shop. "Want a tattoo?"

"Maybe later," she laughed and winked. Finbar waved as we turned and left the shop. We got into the Mustang and drove on for a bit, but Valkyrie suddenly stopped the car. On the sidewalk beside us stood a stick-of-a-man. His hair could blend with the night sky, but his skin could be matched to the pale color of the moon. He wore a simple navy shirt and black pants.

"Hell there!" Valkyrie said, happy.

The man smiled lightly. "I got your message. I've been looking around for him, but so far, I haven't found anything."

"We think he's out of the country at this point in the game," Valkyrie admitted. "But we have a vague idea of where in the world he is."

"Is this Sanguine?" He pointed to me.

"Sanguine, this is Caelan. Caelan, this is Sanguine."

"Howdy."

"Good afternoon."

"Did someone accidentally spill a vat of white paint on ya? Yer pale as a ghost." This guy's skintone was gettin' unnvervin'.

He lifted a long and pale finger to pull at his top lip. I noticed the same pointy fangs I had seen on Dusk. Great, more freakin' vampires.

"So? Find any good blood lately?"

Caelan blinked and turned his attention to Valkyrie. "Is there anything else I can do for you?" He took a step closer. "Give me any job and I can do it."

Valkyrie laughed and shook her head. "We should be fine for now but thanks. I can call you if I need anything, though?"

"Of course. Just don't expect me to answer at night."

She laughed like it was the funniest thing. God dang vampire movin' in closer and closer to her! Who is this creep anyway? What's his deal?

"How's it been going otherwise?" Valkyrie asked him, leanin' against her car.

He shrugged. "Not too horribly bad. I really need to find a hobby, though. I'm so bored in the day, and then I get anxious once night begins to approach."

Valkyrie jabbed her thumb at me and said, "I can get rid of him for a day…" She trailed off and smiled.

The little wuss smiled too. His dark eyes met my own, and my lip curled at him. I dunno who this itty-bitty vampire thought he was, but there ain't no way he's gonna get any closer to Valkyrie.

"I'd like that," he finally said. "But I should really leave now. I need to make sure I have everything for the night."

He gave a wave and turned sharply. He approached a buildin' and sprung upwards to grab onto a window. Quickly he scaled the buildin' and went runnin' away across the rooftops.

Valkyrie gave me a stern look and opened the car door. Before gettin' in the car, she retrieved her cell phone and began makin' a call. Before she could finish diallin' the number, one of them creatures from earlier came crashin' down upon us. Valkyrie snarled in anger. Her crushed phone landed beside me. I didn't have my cell phone either. Realizin' we were alone in an empty part of town with no means of communication, Valkyrie shrugged at me and charged towards the big thing.

Something about this chapter makes me sad ): I guess I just don't like it…Eh, whatever XD

Anyone here ever play Assassin's Creed? My sister's been playing it obsessively, and I've been watching it obsessively.

Thanks for reading and sorry for any mistakes! :DDD