Chapter 6: What's a Dog-Robber?
Mal set his fork down, frowning. "I should dock you a day's pay for this. On Shadow we wouldn't feed this to the pigs."
"I'm forced to admit, Ezra, it's not one of your better efforts," Simon agreed.
Jayne continued shoveling the burnt casserole into his mouth. "I've et worse."
"So've I," Mal admitted. "Doesn't mean I choose to now."
"C'mon, Cap, we've all burned dinner once or twice," Kaylee said.
"Rank amateurs taking turns in the kitchen, sure. Expect more out of the ship's cook." Mal glared at Standish. "Back to the galley, try again. Dinner for nine."
Standish's eyes narrowed. "Yes, sir," he muttered. He left the dining room and returned to the galley.
On Inara's exquisitely chiseled face, one dark eyebrow rose in disapproval. "Really, Mal, was that necessary?"
"What?" the captain pretended not to understand her.
"You went too far this time, Mal," Simon agreed.
"I admit this is tsway-niou[1]," Wash gestured at the food on his plate. "But you don't need to treat him like tsway-niou, too."
River pronounced solemnly, "That's a bad word." She thought a moment, then added, "Unless you're a farmer. They're allowed to say it."
"Just what did Lt. Standish do during the war, Sgt. Reynolds, that you feel justified in treating him the way you do?" Inara demanded.
"He was the colonel's dog-robber." Mal stood and headed for the door. "Let me know when dinner's ready." He stomped out of the dining room.
"Dog-robber? What's a dog-robber?" Kaylee asked.
"You said he was the supply officer for your unit," Wash remembered.
Zoe glanced at her husband, then stared at her plate, idly stabbing the burnt casserole with a fork. Wash hadn't been in the war. He didn't know what it had been like.
Book looked up from his plate. "A dog-robber is someone who tends to the needs of a superior officer. Someone who's willing to rob a dog to get a general –"
"Colonel Oberin, in our case," Zoe interrupted.
" – or a colonel not only the supplies he needs, but the luxuries he wants," the shepherd continued. "Experts at midnight requisitioning, five-finger discounts, black market trading, even commandeering civilian supplies."
Wash suddenly remembered what else Mal had said when Standish came on board, that he put the colonel's needs ahead of the troop's.
"Seems to me you know a lot of unshepherdish things," Jayne remarked. Book just smiled enigmatically.
[1] Bull crap