Hi guys, just thought I would surprise you all with another couple of chapters. I've been extremely lazy over the past few months and for that I am extremely sorry because I know how much you guys n girls enjoy these little bits of randomness. A big thanks goes out to all my friends and reviewers who have encouraged me to keep going, ICED COFFEE AND COOKIES FOR ALL! Well I won't take up anymore of your time so go ahead and start reading.
Disclaimer: I do not own the 'Legend of Zelda'...yet MWAHAHAHA!
"ARE YOU READY FOR THE DODONGO RODEO!" GreatAether96 yelled out at the top of his lungs.
"YES!" screamed the horde of…..well screaming fans.
Dodongo Holding Pen
"Then we shall now begin the first round! First up is Majora!"
"Ok Majora we want you to do your absolute best. Don't fall off no mater what you do or I will have to destroy you" lectured Ganondorf.
"I HAVE MUCH GREATER EVIL POWER THAN YOU WILL EVERY POSSESS GANONDORF SO I WILL BE DESTROYING YOU!...not to mention I'll hug this cute Dodongo so tightly that I will never fall off" Majora said.
"Ok so that was basically 'supreme overlord of evil' and then 'hugs and kisses all around I love rabbits' kind of thing" said a very confused Phantomlink959.
"Stop arguing and get onto your Dodongo!" yelled Dark-Link from the judge's box."
Arena
The hyped up Dodongo was trying to move around in the little holding pen attached to the arena. Ganondorf and Phantomlink959 stood in the arena dressed up as Rodeo Clowns. Ganondorf had a fuzzy red wig with a big red nose. Powdered face which just made his skin look yellow instead of green. As for the clothes; bright baggy pants, floppy shoes and an oversized shirt. Phantom took a much more practical idea and dressed in jeans, boots, a check shirt. He also wore a red nose just to get into the spirit of things.
"Release the Dogogno!" yelled Volvagia.
The Dodongo leapt through the opening in the holding bay, trampled DarkLink and started doing whatever hyped up Dodongo's do whilst being ridden by someone…Nooo not that!
"Aaaaahhhhhh!" screamed Majora as the Dodongo did a full 360 degree turn at high speed sending him flying off and into Ganondorf.
"Quick Pl959, draw its attention so we can get away!" yelled Ganondorf as he struggled to get out from under a suddenly very attached Majora.
"Yo, ugly lizard thing come get me" yelled Pl959 as he mooned the Dodongo.
*WHOOSH, FLAME NOISES*
"Aaarrrrggghhhhhhhhh! This is worse than the result of eating a ton of chilli peppers!" screamed Pl959 as he clutched his scorched backside.
Audience
"Now that looked like it hurt a lot" Leo commented with a slight wince as the Dodongo launched another stream of fire at Phantomlink959.
"Cover your eyes Saria, this is not something a lady should see" said Link as he covered Saria's eyes with his hand.
Saria nodded and tried to cover the blush on her face caused by the sight of Pl959's backside…Link would have a word with him for that
Announcers Box
"And the time was 8.74 seconds yelled Volvagia ecstatically as he watched the trio (GM&Pl) climb out of the arena as the workers got the Dodongo back in its pen to feed it even more stuff for extra punch.
"Now Dark-Link what did you think about that!...err Dark-Link where are you?" said a confused Volvagia as he looked around the empty (except for him) announcers box.
(Meanwhile Dark-Link was in a bar with DRS, talking and flirting a little…hehe youtube's gonna love this stuff.)
"Well seeing as my co-worker is not here, GreatAether96 can announce the next team!" yelled Volvagia.
"Thank you Volvagia my ma…..er dragon. PLEASE WELCOME ROBERT!" yelled GA96.
*….cricket noises*
"Aww where's my applause?" said a very hurt Robert.
"Who cares now get on your Dodongo" replied JGRDL.
*Random conversation coming from DRS in the bar*
"Well it's nice to see that at least one team mate is here for me" said Robert as he turned to….a cardboard cut-out of a now missing JGRDL.
"AND LET'S GO!" yelled Volvagia andGA96"
Arena
Robert sat on the crazed Dodongo, whimpering a little as the workers opened the gate to release the beast. The Dodongo shot out of the holding pen with a giant leap…making Robert hit his head on an overhanging bar…why there was a bar there, we may never know.
The Dodongo tore around the arena with Robert clinging on for dear life, hands clutched to a spike on the Dodongo's back, feet flailing in the air (he looks like a Superman when he's flying…well almost like him anyway).
Suddenly the Dodongo braked, sending Robert flying over its head and into the wall with words sounding like "AAAAHHH, I'M TOO YOUNG TO DIE!"
As the Dodongo advanced upon Robert it was suddenly stopped when a hockey stick hit it over the head.
"I'm back, so have no fear; DRS is here!" yelled said author as she went in to hit the Dodongo again.
"Now is the time for me to show Farore how awesome and cool I am" yelled JGRDL as he leapt out of the crowd to shield Robert from the flames…bad idea.
"AAAARRRGGGGHHH" screamed a flaming JGRDL while a very worried looking Farore gasped in worry…so it got him attention, maybe it was a good idea lol.
"Meanwhile the workers came in and dragged away both an unconscious Robert and Dodongo whilst restraining a maniacally laughing DRS.
Announcer's Box
"Ok so that was new" said a now returned and rather shocked looking Dark-Link.
"Yeah it was 9.03 seconds and…HEY DARK-LINK WHEN DID YOU GET BACK" yelled Volvagia.
"None of your business lizard face" muttered Dark-Link.
"Hey take that back!" yelled Volvagia.
"Make me!" Dark-Link yelled back.
*FIGHTING NOISES*
"Well I supposed my fellow announcers / judges are busy at the moment so onto the next rider…HAIL ISSACIVAN THE NERD WONDER!
*WTF? WHAT DID HE CALL HIM? OTHER CROWD NOISES*
"Yay its time for me to shine!" yelled a happy Issacivan.
"Yeah whatever, just don't embarrass us" said archsage328.
"What he said nerd boy" added EvilDestroyer.
"Don't worry, I wont cause you two do enough of that yourself" Issacivan curtly replied.
Before AS328 and ED could do anything to get revenge on their team mate, the workers opened the pen and the (new) Dodongo leapt out in a frenzied rush.
Arena
As with the other Dodongos, this one was desperately trying to get the persistent author off its back but this nerd wasn't going to go down easy. The Dodongo ran head first at a wall trying to get Issacivan off but all it got out of that was a sore head and a burst of laughter from the audience.
"HAHAHA, I AM A MASTER OF DODONGO'S WITH MY AWESOME AND INCREDIABLY INFORMATIVE NOTES!" yelled a smug Issacivan as he watch a shocked AS328 and ED.
Of course because he was looking at them he didn't see the monkey hanging from the overhanging bar which Robert had encountered earlier.
*WHACK, MONKEY SCREAM*
Issacivan was knocked off the Dodongo with the monkey firmly holding onto his face without any indication of letting go. The Dodongo walked up to Issacivan with a crazed look in its eyes.
*WHOOSH, FLAME NOISEs*
"AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH" screamed Issacivan and the monkey as the ran around the arena.
Meanwhile ED and AS328 where in the crowd eating salted nuts and drinking coke and milkshakes while watching the scene unfolding in front of them.
"Should we go help him now?" asked ED as he took a sip of his drink.
"Nah, I say we leave him for a bit longer" replied a smirking AS328 as he threw a nut at Navi.
*WHACK*
Audience
"The nerve of him" huffed Navi as she lowered her cricket bat and turned away from the unconscious AS328 and laughing ED.
"I don't think you should have hit him that hard though Navi, it was only one nut" Saria said sternly.
"That's not the point, it's the principle of the thing" Navi replied arrogantly.
"Whatever you say Navi" Link said with a sigh of exasperation.
Leo just sat back and ate the nut while watching Issacivan finally manage to get out of the arena relatively intact.
Announcer's Box
"Well that sure was fun!" yelled Volvagia.
"Hehe, yeah he was hurt majorly" Dark-Link chuckled.
"Did you just chuckle Dark-Link?" asked a surprised Volvagia.
"…It was an evil chuckle" Dark-Link replied indignantly.
"Whatever, anyway Issacivan lasted for…9.52 SECONDS!" yelled Volvagia.
"Yay!" shouted Issacivan before collapsing on the ground only to twitch a few times.
"Ok people now we move onto the next rider…PLEASE WELCOME RUTO!" GA96 shouted into the microphone.
*BOO! GET OUT OF HERE!*
"Well that was not very nice at all" said Ruto.
"They're just saving their voices to cheer for me, especially Link" Zelda replied smugly.
"As if princess, he's mine!" Malon yelled.
"His eyes will be on me the whole time we're in the arena" Ruto yelled back.
*CATFIGHT!*
Dark-Link covered his face with his hand as the workers tried to stop the fight, all to no avail. Meanwhile the Dodongo was getting sick and tired of this and so it managed to turn slightly in its pen before incinerating the trio of fighting girls. As the tree girls collapsed and were carried away GA96 stood up and cleared his voice.
"Well those three don't get any points for this round, maybe they will realise their mistake next time…NOW ONTO MEDLI'S RIDE!"
Arena
"Just hold on tight and don't fall off, it's as easy as that" said Tetra as she patted Medli's back and winked.
"Remember that if you are our team-mate and that if you are hurt then that Dodongo's days are numbered" Midna added with her freaky grin…*shudder*
"Thanks guys, I'll do my best" said a now very confident Medli as she climbed up on her Dodongo.
Her confidence wavered as the gates opened and the beast rushed forward with a roar, shaking about and twisting around. As the Dodongo rushed towards a wall at full speed Medli's wings opened and caught the wind, sending her tumbling off of the Dodongo to land painfully on the ground. As the Dodongo turned around to face the fallen Medli, it was suddenly hit in the tail with a scimitar and a blast of twilight energy.
"You hurt our team-mate!" yelled Tetra.
"Prepare to die!" Midna shouted in response.
Meldi winced as she saw the Dodongo being pulverised into the ground by the ferocious duo of fighters. She also winced futher when the workers tried to pull them away only to be beaten into the ground along with the Dodongo. Eventually armed guards came in and tazored Tetra and Midna whilst Medli crept out of the arena with a shocked expression on her face.
Announcer's Box
"Man, I really wanted to join in there and hurt a Dodongo" said Dark-Link in a wishful tone of voice.
"Well personally I thought it was horrible. Dodongos are close relatives of us Dragons" said Volvagia with disgust.
"Hmmm, close relative you say" said Dark-Link as an evil grin came over his face.
"What are you looking at Dark-Link?...Dark-Link you're freaking me out here…Don't come any clos-OH GOD THE HORROR!"
GreatAether96 looked shocked as Dark-Link leapt on Volvagia, sword drawn, and proceeded to beat the living daylights out of the dragon.
"That's…scary" said GA96 as he checked to make sure that he looked nothing like a Dragon or Dodongo.
Audience
"Hey she did pretty well there" said Leo as he looked up at the clock.
"Yeah, 8.23 seconds is more than I thought she would have gotten" said Saria.
"You'll do even better when the time comes Saria" said Link with a charming smile.
"Aww, thanks Link" said Saria as she hugged him and gave him a quick peck on the cheek.
"I wanna hurt Dodongos too" said Navi before spotting DL and Volvagia and joining in.
*INCREASED SCREAMING FROM VOLVAGIA*
Announcer's Box
"Man, they're still going" said GA96 with a worried look on his face as he watched the fight. "Oh well, let's go onto the next person! EVERYBODY, PUT YOUR HANDS TOGETHER FOR FARORE!"
The crowd started clapping and JGRDL even threw in a wolf whistle…without being seen of course.
"Everyone is so nice to me" said Farore with a smile and slight blush on her face…ok so I lied, she did see JGRDL.
"Go for it sis!" shouted Nayru with a grin as she made the V for victory sign.
"We know you can do it Farore" said Din as she high-fived Farore and patted her on the back for support.
"Thanks sisters, here I go!" yelled Farore as the gate opened and the Dodongo ran forward with an ear splitting roar.
Arena
The Dodongo did a full 360 degree turn as it inhaled sharply, its skin growing hotter as the flames built up inside. Farore felt sweat bead her brow as the Dodongo released the fire in a large burst, rapidly propelling it backwards and almost causing her to lose her grip. She just managed to cling onto the tough hide, gritting her teeth as she pulled herself back into a more comfortable position. However, the Dodongo sensed its opportunity and leapt into the air (they can do that!) to land heavily on the ground, jostling Farore around enough to break her tedious grip. After that a simple quick spin sent Farore tumbling off the Dodongo and onto the ground.
Din and Nayru immediately leapt into action to draw the Dodongo's attention away from Farore…literally leapt! The two goddesses landed on the Dodongo and began taking it down pro wrestling style. Bets were placed and a referee was chosen while Farore cheered for her sisters from the sidelines as JGRDL tried to get close to her.
Announcer's Box
"…Hello? Yes I would like to order 10 gallons of mud please…oh never mind, it ended. Sorry to bother you"
"What were you doing there Dark-Link?" asked Volvagia.
"Um…nothing" said a very suspicious looking Dark-Link.
"Riiiggghht" a non-convinced Volvagia replied.
"Hey guys you didn't announce the time Farore got!" exclaimed GA96
"Oh yeah, well her time was…" began Dark-Link until he was cut off.
"8.96 SECONDS!" finished Volvagia.
*WHACK, BAM, POW*
"…stupid dragon"
"Ok, onto the next round now…GO SARIA GO!" announced GA96
"Ok it's finally my turn guys…wish me luck" said Saria as she climbed onto the back of her Dodongo.
"Don't worry, I know you'll do great" said Link with a reassuring smile.
"Just hold on tight for as long as you can Saria!" said Navi.
"We'll be proud of you as long as you try your best" Leo added.
"Thanks guys…but where's LH? Isn't he supposed to be here?" asked Saria.
"Hmm, now that you mention it, he hasn't been around for the entire first round" replied Link
"Did you do something to him Navi?" asked Leo.
"Well for once I left him completely alone" replied Navi.
Any further conversation was cut off by the opening of the holding pen's gate and the sudden rushing forward of the Dodongo.
Arena
Saria's face was as pale as a sheet as the crazed Dodongo ran towards a wall, bucking and twisting in an effort to get her off its back. In a sudden movement the Dodongo leapt backwards sending Saria tumbling forwards. After that the Dodongo spun around, unseating Saria and sending falling to the ground. Raising a giant clawed foot the Dodongo went to crush Saria. Link rushed forwards yelling at the top of his lung, trying to take the Dodongo's attention away from Saria but with no success. The giant foot descended with a loud thump and a cloud of dust.
"SARIA!" Link shouted / screamed as he rushed forward and began to hack up the Dodongo. As the finishing blow was dealt the Dodongo started to glow red, indication that it was going to blow up.
Feeling a tap on his shoulder Link turned around to see Navi, Leo…and Saria!
"Saria…you're ok!" shouted Link as he threw his arms around her.
"Yeah, someone threw me out of the way at the last moment" said Saria as the Dodongo exploded.
Everyone looked in the newly formed crater to see a figure barely moving, clothes singed and body slammed in the ground. As they got closer the figure turned over and smiled.
"Sorry I'm late guys" I said before fading into unconsciousness.
Announcer's Box
"Wow what excitement just then, 8.43 seconds on the Dodongo and added fireworks" said Volvagia.
"Yeah, it was ok I suppose" said Dark-Link.
"I feel sorry for when LH wakes up" said GA96
"Why?" asked Volvagia.
"Because he's going to be fretted over by nurse Nayru and that means he'll be completely at her mercy" replied GA96.
"…The horror" said Dark-Link as he watched Nayru teleport my body to her room whilst she grabbed a nurse uniform.
Well I hope you all enjoyed that and I also hope that I managed to meet expectations. I had to do something heroic and utterly stupid at the end
didn't I lol? Well please press that green button and review. I accept anonymous reviews but if you have an account and signed review then I can reply to it. Cheers!
~LinkHammer~