Disclaimer: I own Inuyasha dvds- not the rights to Inuyasha... I own this story- not the characters... I own this computer- not this computer's company... I own this room- not this house... I own my world- not the world... Do I need to go on?
A/N: I know, I went over my time limit, and I can explain. When I first wrote the beginning (actually 7 pages worth), I was on a roll from the last chapter and just kept going. However, I hit a blank spot and it seemed to expand for about two and a half weeks. I liked where it ended at 7 pages... but I couldn't bring myself to post it if it was that short... then I wrote 3 more pages... Not much more, I know, but it satisfied me, even though I don't know how the hell I ended up where I was when I finished... You'll see what I mean when you get there...
Anyway, we have got WNB changes... Promoters? Yeah, I think I'll throw those in as well...
Main Branch:
President: Sakura-chan88
Vice President: Snowfire the Kitsune
Public Service Director: Mitsuko Maxwell
Treasurer: Yume no Tame ni
Informant: The Weird One
Accountant: Whoobonhooaglo
Executive: The Turmoil Twins
Intern: Kourinoyami
Chief Consultant: Nankinmai
Customer Service Representative: Obsidiansoul
Product Representative: Ominous
Spokesmen: Ame Kurayami
Creative Director: D.g.
Manager: Erica
Assistant Manager: Brat
Advisor: FLaMEChick
Supervisor: Kagome-chan5
Director of Hard Liquor: Hon-doroboo Xanthros
Mascot: superbakagirl
Village Idiot: Ama (Shades of Oblivion
Eccentric Wanna-be: Ice Dagger
International, Bi-polar, Klutzy Editor: Tireth Minet
Greeter: Hawk
Coat Taker: Shadow
Valet: Kinshinanie
Sexy Hammer-Weilding Security Guard: Leah Black
Jester: Inuchick13
Interior Duct-Tape Decorator: Inu-luva
Mystical Creatures Department:
Master Trainer and President: Silver Dragon
Supervisor of MCD trainees: QuirkyCellist
Griffin's General: Museless Author
Executive: soulfire2
Chief Consultant: Cryxxy-chan
Army of Insane Gerbal's General: Merayna
Army of Secret Spy Monkey's General: Diana
Spy/Secret Agent Division:
President: Kaze no Kagura
Executive: FreedomFighta06
Spy in Training: Meow the chibi neko
Secret Operative: Rei-chan
Master Spy: NekoYami
Master Sniper: Fokkusu Inuyasha
Consultant: Ebony-chan
Hyper Active Little Hacker Girl: StarLightKagome
Firearms Specialist: Mocha-Expresso
Department of Sarcasm and Murder Schemes:
President: Three-Legged Dog
Informant: SakuraMona
Executive: moon neko princess
Schemester: Ipwnzj00
Weapons Master: Rumi ai no Pocky
Department of Sexy Bishie Worshippers:
President: Shini no Tenshi
Vice President: Hiarashi
Executive: JoyaSagrada
Head Priestess: Shadow Kitsune 81
Hey, everyone- I have a little announcement to make..... WNB has 53 members in all!!! Sugoi... I never thought it would get so many members...
o8oo8oo8oPROMOTER! PLEASE, CHECK THIS OUT!o8oo8oo8o
Okay, first off, I have a promoter for a website. This site is a fanfiction judging site that You! has been nominated at. Many other great authors have their stories there, so check it out. Later on, after the judging, I believe, there will be a People's Choice vote. The layouts are nice and easy to use, so browse around while you're there, yeah? Remember- all these stories are well worth the read- that's why they were nominated.
http: protege. just-in-dreams. com
(remember to remove the spaces...)
o8oo8oo8oWHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?!o8oo8oo8o
Alright- here we go!
Enjoy, ya hear?
o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o
Title: Me?
By: Sakura-chan88
The Sun, the Snake, and the Sea
o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o
So, this is what you want to do to get back at him, is it? Test him? Tease him with a woman he used to have? A woman he used to love? ... Watch her hold him close in an intimate embrace? Look, she cries- she sobs, this twin of yours. Look, she regrets, she begs, she acts... She acts! Look, look close, you fool! She's playing the part of the heartbroken innocent! She's acting it out perfectly- crying in his shoulder, arms around his neck. But, will he see it? Will he if he doesn't wish to? Come on, girl, think about it. You've done this to yourself by allowing him to see her- allowing him the chance to choose... You needed to... You need to know what's real after so many lies. ...What lies? He never lied. He just never told you. Open your eyes girl! Open them wide! You're running out of time! Don't let her get any closer- stop the actress before the curtain falls!
My mind stilled for a fraction of a second after shouting the blaring obvious- that she was putting on a fucking act to seduce him back into her arms, her life. My mouth took the opportunity at the silence in my head and spoke.
"Inuyasha... I'd like you to meet my sister, Marry."
My husband's eyes flickered over to me, and I gasped, seeing tears form in his eyes. 'Ii-iie...'
"Kagome..." He looked away again with a shutter, his hands rising from his sides to fall on Kikyou's shoulders. With a gentle push, the woman was shaken from him, taken aback at his actions.
"Inuyasha?"
"Kikyou, come with me," he muttered, motioning for me. Her eyes sparkled with joyful tears. "We need to talk. I think Kagome failed to mention a few things..."
She frowned at that, sending me a questioning look as he walked away. My gaze fell to the ground until she moved to follow him. I shuffled my feet, trailing behind him also, knowing what he had to say would be directed more toward me than to the woman between us.
Inuyasha stood by our limo, Myouga stuttering in question before being commanded to leave. The elder did as he was ordered, scowling softly and giving me a 'good luck' glance. I swallowed passed the lump in my throat and chanced a look at the silent singer. He was looking at Kikyou with an almost emotionless gaze, yet I caught something- and it made my hopes soar, yet my heart ache.
He was hurt. His past was back from its grave, and he didn't want it. He didn't need a new heart-
just to be near his own.
"Kikyou... can you wait here a second," he asked, opening the limo door for her. "I need to talk to Kagome alone..."
Kikyou smiled and nodded, slipping into the car with grace I knew I'd never achieve as she looked at me once more with a suspicious glint in her eyes.
Inuyasha was silent once more, his head bowed and a thoughtful sneer in place. The wind died completely. Not even a gentle breeze teased the air. It... scared me. The change in weather, not the man in front of me- as if the world was reacting to him.
"I told you you'd love her," I whispered. "And I was right- even if not in the same sense, you still love her."
A humorless snort was released into the motionless air. "Anta... no baka... I never loved her- I already explained that."
"Really?"
"Really."
"Then, how do I know for certain you love me?"
He looked up at this point, narrowing his eyes as the sun in the golden orbs sank lower into the pure white horizon. "How can you question it?"
"I..." I breathed, my breath hitching at the look in his gaze before my resolve hardened once more.
"Because you've lied to me so often."
"Lied? Kagome, I've never lied to you."
"Oh, right..." I laughed. "You've just failed to mention certain things that mean a world of difference to me."
"Like what?"
"Inuyasha, Kikyou would never accept!" I repeated Kikyou's earlier words, frowning. "Does it ring a bell?"
Inuyasha's face, even his darkening eyes, brightened at my words, a huge grin crossing his face,
thoroughly startling me. What the hell was so damned wonderful about Inuyasha's past interupted proposal? Oh, but then he totally blew me right out of the water.
He laughed.
Laughed!
As in, 'hahahahaha! You believed that!' kind of laugh!
"Kagome, really, do you think I wouldn't tell you I was going to propose to her if I was?"
Inuyasha asked, taking one huge step forward and wrapping his arms around me, pulling me so tight against him, it's hard to breath. I gasped.
'What the hell!?'
"Inu...?"
"Kouga misunderstood me when I showed him the ring; and when I tried to explain, he attacked me, calling me a 'fucking liar' and all that bullshit." He chuckled again and I felt his lips press a kiss to the top of my head. "I was going to give her a promise ring- no, not one to say we'd marry someday, but to say we'd stay friends- even though I was sure we'd eventually get married, even with the fucking media standing on our doorstep. When she left, I wound up giving the ring to Yura. I hadn't seen Yura in two years, so it seemed right to say 'let's be friends,' ne?"
I felt like crying, but I couldn't bring myself to tears. So, I smiled warmly into his shoulder, brought my arms around him, and held him close... oh, so close...
"Domo sumimasen, Inuyasha!" I whispered, hoping he heard me.
"Is that all this is about?"
I shook my head. "Iie... I was afraid you'd leave if she wanted you back."
He pulled back a bit to look in my eyes and smirked, bringing a calloused thumb up to trace my cheekbones. "I can't leave my heart. I'd die without it."
And, you know what?
I didn't see a sunset anymore.
"Even as the tortured heart
Beats its very last,
The love I have for us
Will never be of the past,"
I don't know how long we stood there, but it was long enough for Kikyou to step out of the limousine and stumble over her words, as well as her feet. I tightened my embrace a little before letting go of him completely. Inuyasha laughed with his eyes, telling me it was time to break the news.
Oh, I hated to hurt Kikyou... But, this would prove to be fun.
"Kikyou," I called to the girl, smiling sadly at her as we, Inuyasha and I, moved to help her right herself again. "I didn't know how to tell you earlier without Inuyasha being here... So, I'll have to tell you now..."
"Iie, let me," Inuyasha intervened, pulling Kikyou more towards him. "Kikyou, back at graduation... What happened was a misunderstanding."
"What do you mean?" she implored, blinking owlishly.
"I mean, I wasn't going to propose... I was going to tell you... To tell you that..."
"Go on, Inuyasha," I encouraged, smiling softly as inside I laughed. It was a game to me really,
watching Inuyasha act this out as he was.
My world is a stage, and all the people in it are actors- and they all seem born for their part! Oh... how does that Shakespearian line go?
"Kikyou, when I dated you, I did it because I thought you could change me," he said, biting his lower lip. "I thought you could... uh... change my preferences..."
I put on my best poker face as I willed myself not to laugh. Oh, Kami-sama, I wanted to laugh!
"What... I... don't understand..." Kikyou's eyes had enlarged considerably in confused shock. Somewhere in her subconscious she understood, but it wasn't registering yet.
"Kikyou, I like guys..."
Her eyes flew wide, before rolling up into her head, exposing nothing but glossy white. The knees holding her straight buckled, and she pitched forward into Inuyasha's arms, her whole form lax from her unexpected faint.
"Yeah... I'm gay," Inuyasha finished telling the unconscious woman in his arms. "Haven't you ever wondered why I stay with that prick Kouga?"
I let my laughter ring through the air, and Inuyasha soon joined me as he maneuvered the body to carry it more conveniently.
"That was rather easy."
"Un. And mean... Demo (but), Inuyasha... What happens if she wants to be your friend after she gets her senses together?"
"Then," he grinned and leaned over to nip at my neck. "You'll gradually change the heart that she couldn't."
"Because I won't give up
For a single, rather faulty,
Present piece of the larger puzzle
Known as Love's reality"
"What happened?" Suikotsu asked, leaping from his spot beside Sandra to better examine the woman currently being transferred from Inuyasha's arms to mine and Kagura's.
Kagura shook her head at the grin I sported. "What did you do to her?"
"I didn't do anything," I chirped, casting a laugh over my shoulder to my husband as he whispered to Kouga and Miroku. "Inuyasha's the one you should corner this time."
Sango squeaked somewhere behind me and I turned my head as best I could to see what happened. Suikotsu took Kikyou from us, allowing me to move closer to the woman who was being suffocated by a bear hug given from a fearful Miroku. I could only guess what Miroku had heard Inuyasha say to get such a reaction.
"Inuyasha... WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOUR HEAD? Have you lost it completely!?" Kouga bellowed, moving as far from the singer as he could. "Absolutely no way in hell am I going to fake being your boyfriend!"
"After all, what the hell
Are best friends for?
Shouldn't we, as lovers,
Be something much more?"
'Dear Diary, May 30th, Saturday....
About that song that popped into my head during auditions...
I've finally figured it out. The snake, the poison, the 'something left undone'...
Kikyou wasn't the snake, nor the poison, but what I had to overcome was centered around her. My mind, the snake itself, filled me with doubt, the poison. I had to find the trust. I had to open the book of Inuyasha's past- the one I'd closed thinking it would never matter to me since the present is what's important.
My one sadistic mind almost ruined my life.
And Inuyasha couldn't guard me from it- he couldn't protect me from it. The only thing he couldn't protect me from was the one thing I needed to be shielded against.
Isn't life ironic?'
"And when the danger
Finally passes us by
In the form of a snake
With apple shaped eyes,
I'll be there for you
And you'll be there for me
Just as we were the day
The sun met the sea,"
"I can't believe I'm faking being your boyfriend..." Kouga whispered in defeat, hands pulling at his hair in frustration as the limo pulled closer to the finish line. It was opening night for 'Loaded Lies' and, me being part of Demonic, the boys came along as well- as did Sango and Kagura. Yura was stuck with the kids. Poor girl. "Plus, what about the media- hell, what about Sesshomaru!?"
"Hush, dear," Inuyasha purred, chuckling. "You should be more worried about Ayame."
"Ah! I forgot- what about Ayame!? She's going to totally flip!"
Sango sighed, resting a hand on her ballooning abdomen. "Baka!" Kouga was effectively silenced. Kagura nodded in approval and understanding. "You don't have to show the cameras! Kikyou probably thinks Inuyasha wants to keep it a secret anyway, so just act normal around each other until Kikyou approaches you INSIDE the-"
"Ah! We're here," Rin shrilled in delight, bouncing up and down in anticipation as the door was pulled open to let us step out onto the red carpet. I smiled warmly, stepped out after the two children, and laced my arms through Inuyasha's and Miroku's as Kouga threw Rin up to sit on his shoulder and Inuyasha did the same with Shippo. "Yay!"
Flashes bright enough to blind and squeals loud enough to deafen filled the air I struggled to take in. The excitement was building in me- my movie, my first movie- and hopefully my last- was being played for the first time for the critics to view and comment on. Don't get me wrong, I loved making the movie, but with the stress it put me through, I was certain to have a few gray hairs very, very soon.
I mean, with Inuyasha's problems- mainly surrounding a female set on 'changing' him- and Shippo's hyper behavior I'm sure he attained from spending so much time with Rin, the movie just added on to the weight pressed on my shoulders. Ah, and don't forget the concerts I was forced to attend at least twice every month.
Yes, Kikyou did decide she wanted to be Inuyasha's 'friend', but we all knew she was trying to change him. No one ever broke the news to her, though. No one had the heart to do something that would hurt her when she was clearly already hurting from her past mistakes. Even I, the one that fretted the most over Inuyasha's heart, could not be cruel enough to say, "I hold his heart he once would have given you, had you only trusted him..."
"Had you only trusted him..."
I sighed inside, smiling brightly for the cameras flashing in my face in a frenetic fashion. I hadn't trusted him, I was just lucky enough to love him enough to want him to stay- and, of course, hurt him, which, ironically, was more helpful, more healing, than not.
But, now that I look back on it, there are questions running through my head:
What would have happened, though, if I had told him from the beginning, the day I met her? Would he have still laughed about it? Would he have still not taken the hand she was freely offering?
Was it necissary for me to go through all of that pain?
Maybe, maybe not.
Whatever the answer, I wouldn't have changed what happened. Not one bit...
Okay, so I may have changed the little things, like saying I didn't trust him. Maybe I wouldn't have shared my pain for him to suffer as well. Yet, wouldn't that take away from us as I felt his exclusion on the 'ring' did before I knew the truth? It would have been the same thing- me not saying, "we have a problem." Also, would I trust him as much as I do now?
Unconditionally?
Hmm... Well, that's always something for me to think about, isn't it...?
"Ms. Higurashi, is this truly your first appearance in a full length movie?"
I blinked unintelligently at the reporter standing on the sidelines and nodded, calling out a "yes"
for him in case the flashes of the cameras still clicking away had obscured his vision.
"And is this your last?" another reporter pressed, her pen pointed down upon the pad of paper she sported.
"I believe it will be my last, yes," I stated, feeling Inuyasha pull away to carry Shippo over to a gaggle of girls cooing at my son, asking for an autograph. I smiled sweetly at the show of father and son... uh, not that the public knew! "I enjoyed life on the set, but my place is on stage,
singing my heart out for others."
"How is Demonic nowadays?" a familiar voice interogated. My head snapped to the left to see a woman dressed in an navy blue business suit standing beside a camera with a mic in her hand.
"Hello, Kagome."
"Nazuna! How are you?"
"Wonderful. However, you've got to get going! You're going to get trampled on the runway if you don't hurry on your way," she warned. "I've seen it happen to the best of the best in show business."
"Thank you for the warning- and Demonic is growing stronger every day."
'Hai, we're all growing stronger ever day...'
"Help me create a new Eden
One snake free
Beside the sea
Help me make a purer Eden
Where the sun will be
For only you and me,"
'Dear Diary, July 28th
I'm back... Haven't written in a while... But, I need to get something off my chest...
Inuyasha and I, we're doing so much better- it's hard to believe anything was ever wrong in the first place. Kikyou and I are getting along great, too. I still find it hard to be near her, knowing I've lied so thoroughly to her- literally, I'm living a lie while around her. I'm known as Kagome Higurashi, loveless and lifeless.... oh, and hopelessly romantic. She doesn't let me live down my 'Inuyasha and me? No way- he's a jerk' statement- always calling me crazy for not falling absolutely head over heels in love with him... If only she knew each time she said that, she was sticking her foot- iie, her entire leg!- into her mouth...
Anyway, back on subject... In three days, I have an opening concert to preform with Demonic for Dialone Park... I've met with Goku-mar Dialone and he's a stict looking man... He won't take well to a mistake, I can tell- and that's not helpful... I'm worried about the stress I've been put under... What kind of effect is it going to have on me-
and the baby?'
"Kagome?" Inuyasha's voice drifted into the room from the bathroom. "You okay? You've been really quiet."
I sighed and put my diary away. "I'm fine, Inuyasha... Just worried."
"Now, that doesn't sound like you." I heard the door open and felt the air quickly change with the stem rolling out.
"One of these days, you're going to burn yourself..."
"Kagome, what's wrong now?"
I glanced over my shoulder at my husband as he sat beside me on the edge of the bed. I still can't explain how releaved I am that the sunset never did return to his eyes after the incident with Kikyou. Even when I was looking at him right then, only concern coloured his eyes- not hurt, not desolation.
I decided that day that his eyes had truly changed for the better; I decided that day what I saw was the sea. A sea of golden light from the noonday sun shining bright rays of life and love. No shark fin marred the surface, no inky black oil stained the waves of emotions.
His eyes were in flashback mode of the cruise we took but a year ago, permanantly replaying the image of peace and confessions of the heart that the sea stood for in our minds. It was were we first kissed- in the water, in a pool on the deck of a ship at sea... It was were we first confessed there were feelings, deep and true, much like the ocean beneath us.
Deep and true, and untroubled by its past.
I couldn't help but smile. "Nothing's wrong. Everything is just how it should be."
Inuyasha tilted his head to the side in question. "Are you sure? You haven't been acting like yourself ever since the premier."
Ah, the premier... The premier was wonderful. A very small amount of the critics had something negative to say, and everyone one of them complimented the acting of each person. I can say I'm very proud of the movie. Though it won't be out for public viewing yet, I know it's going to be a sure box office hit.
The day after the premier, however, Sango, Kagura, and I took a trip to the doctors. Sango for a checkup, and me for a few concerns. Let's say, I walked out of the doctors office with more questions than answers.
My answer for the questions- it sucks to be female...
"Inuyasha, what do you think about Shippo?"
He blinked, clearly confused. "Where's this coming from?"
I frowned. "Onegai, just answer the question..."
"He's a spoiled little brat with an ego the size of Europe." Inuyasha snorted and threw his arm over my shoulder, pulling me to his side. "And I love him like a son, if you must know."
"... Do you want children...?"
I felt his arm tense, his whole form spinning to face me complete. "... Oh... shit..."
I would have cried right then and there, but it's hard to cry when your mind is drown in passion induced from a frantic kiss by a lover.
I swear, I hate that man at times. Making me want to cry, then giggle with happiness; he can be so frustrating. Perhaps that is why I love him so much. He has the ability, and he is the only one with the ability, to make me so emotional.
He pulled away just enough to whisper, "I think we should call Sesshomaru."
Ah, great Inuyasha. Ruin the mood AND our career. Brilliantly disasterous words, those were.
Actually, "Sesshomaru" is enough to make me go... "brrr..."
I guess my grimace and slight shudder made him realize his mistake, because he sighed, "I'm the Master of all things dumb and worthless..."
I couldn't keep the smile from forming on my lips. "Iie, you're the Master of all things dumb and worthwhile."
"Gee, that makes me feel so much better."
"Good." I grinned and moved to get the brush from the bathroom, setting myself behind the silver mane. "Now, about names..."
"And I'll never stop,
I'll fight on with you
To keep the love and Eden
Wonderfully pure---
Wonderfully pureOur sun and the sea
For only you and me
Eden snake free..."
A/N: [blinks] oh...kay? I don't know how the hell I ended up here- I never even planned for Kag to be pregnant... Not even at the end... . oh, geez... My plot has been officially thrown out the proverbial window... And that song turn out to be totally different- it was origanally an extention to 'Tear for Tear', but things changed when I added in the 'Dear Diary' parts... [blinks] Maybe I shouldn't edit it so much, ne? Changes everything when I do that...
Sorry if it seems forced or jumpy, but I couldn't get what I wanted to say down right and it ended up sounding a bit... odd to me. [wonders off in thought]
Anyway- how do you think they'll explain this to Kikyou? Or the public, for that matter? And what will Sesshomaru's reaction be? Oh, and can anyway guess why I gave a man such a rediculous name as 'Goku-mar Dialone' and why it sounds a bit... sinister? [Snickers "Die alone... Die alone!"] Uh... [Coughs] I had a bit more sugar than usual. --- What can I say, I don't like tea, but if you add a LOT of sugar and a bit of diet Vernors... [grins] I bet you're all going, "wha...? Gross!" But it is much better than Diet Vernors or tea by itself... [blinks] Now I'm officially rambling on like an idiot. Please, excuse my short attention spand...---
By the way, the Shakespearian line mentioned is from "As You Like It," Act 2, Scene 7:
"All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players.
They have their exits and their entrances;
And one man in his time plays many parts..."
Ja ne!
P.S. If anyone feels like talking (to complain about something, or ramble on for no reason, and you want someone to listen) I'm here. You can send me your email address via review, or email me at/or im me at Sangochan88 for Yahoo-- I'm rarely on Taijiya Sakura88 for AIM, but I'm still on occassionally if you want to get a hold of me there....