I just want to start off by saying, my awesome Beta, Audrey she is amazing and I'd be lost without her. Thank you all for the wonderful reviews and I know a lot of you wanted to kill Edward, but be gentle on the boy, he will eventually get it together. As always, tell me what you think!
CHAPTER 20
BPOV
After Edward left to answer his phone, I decided I would go check my own. Holy crow, I had 11 missed calls from Rosalie and 3 voicemails. I listened to each one with her sniffling and asking me to call back.
Her phone rang twice before she picked it up.
"Bella?" Her nose sounded stuffy.
"Rose, what's wrong? I just got your messages." I asked with concern.
"I need you to come home, please. It's really important; I don't want to talk about it over the phone." She began to sob
Without even needing to think, I answered yes.
"Of course Rose, I will be home in a few." I said to her reassuringly.
"Thanks Bella."
We hung up and I went into the subs bedroom and grabbed a pair of jeans and a tee shirt. I knew Edward would understand. I gathered up my things and waited by his office door for him to finish his call. He ended it and came over to where I was standing. I explained I needed to get home. I was disappointed that I had to leave, and almost happy that he was also.
Once I left Edward's apartment it took me about 15 minutes to get home. Apparently, the traffic sucked this early in the afternoon. I paid the driver and ran up the stairs into the apartment.
Rose was sitting on the couch with a red nose and a box of tissues. She was still in her pajamas wrapped in a big purple comforter. I dropped my stuff on the table by the door and walked over to Rose. I sat beside her on the couch and wrapped my arm around her shoulders.
She put her head on my shoulder and hugged me around my waist.
"Oh Bella, I'm such a screw up." She sobbed into my chest.
"Shoo Rose you are not a screw up. Why would you say that?" I cooed trying to comfort her.
"Because I'm pregnant and I don't know what to do. Emmett will freak out!" She clutched tighter at my shirt.
Well I didn't expect her to say anything like that. The thought of Rose being a mother, well that just shocked the hell out of me. She always loved kids, but to think of her and Emmett as parents. It was very hard to picture.
"Why didn't you tell me sooner?" I held her close to me.
"I just found out this morning. My period is like a week late. I have never been late, EVER!"
"Did you take a test?" I stroked her forehead.
"I was waiting for you. I was too scared to do it by myself."
I got off the couch and stuck my hand out for her to take. I pulled her to her feet and held her hand as we walked into the bathroom. The pregnancy test was sitting on the sink unopened. Rose picked up the box and read the directions on the back.
She grabbed a disposable cup we had on the counter, and walked to where the toilet was. I was going to walk out to give her some privacy, but she grabbed my wrist.
"Stay with me please. I can't do this alone." Her sad eyes pleaded with me.
I nodded to reassure her, but turned my head as she peed in the cup. I heard the toilet flush and I turned to face my friend. She placed the cup on the counter and opened the pregnancy test. She carefully read how to dip it and placed the tip in the urine. It was a 60 second test.
She placed the test on the sink and she pulled me into her bedroom. We sat on the bed not saying a single word. Time seemed to move extremely slowly. We sat there for what seemed like forever until Rose broke the silence.
"Should we look? I think it's been over 5 minutes already." She suggested.
"Are you ready?" I asked nervously.
"No definitely not. Would you look for me?" She grabbed my hand and squeezed it.
"Sure", I stood up from the bed and back into the bathroom. It was a digital test, so instead of seeing lines, it would just say pregnant or not pregnant.
The results were in. I picked up the stick and brought it back into the room. I placed it in Rose's hand and her face went from appalled to relief in one second.
"I'm not." She whispered staring at the stick.
Her face lit up with a smile, but it looked very forced. I was somewhat confused. Then she burst into tears. I moved to her side and hugged her to me.
"Aren't you happy it's negative? I thought you would be overjoyed." I asked puzzled.
"Is it wrong that I wish it was positive? Just a small part of me wanted it to be." She wept.
"Oh Rose it's not wrong at all." I held her as she cried.
"Can you imagine Emmett as a father?" She laughed finally, wiping her face.
"He would be amazing. He is a big ass kid himself." I laughed with her.
"Yes he is. It's one of the best things about him. I couldn't imagine Edward with a kid. So glad that girl ended up being pregnant by someone else huh." She nudged me in the side.
"Yeah, wait what?" I looked at her perplexed.
Her eyes bugged out of her head as she realized she'd said something she wasn't supposed to.
"N-nothing." She stuttered looking away.
"Rose." I warned.
"Emmett is going to kill me for sure." She covered her face with her hand.
She sighed loudly and slumped back into the pillows on the bed.
"When they went to Detroit last week they took Edward's ex with them because she claimed she was pregnant." She looked at me.
"Edward told me she wasn't pregnant, that she was lying to him!" I was getting angry.
"Well she was lying, she is (or was) pregnant, but not with Edward's child. Could you imagine that, jeez. That would be one lucky kid." Rose looked envious.
"Rose, get on with your damn story."
She looked nervous and sat up a little straighter.
"He had her take a blood test and a lie detector test and of course she was lying. She was trying to trap him, though Edward doesn't cross me as the type to take shit from anyone. Hell, he gives me a run for my money and that's saying a lot. But don't you dare tell him I said that!" She protested.
"Rose the least of our worries right now is how you're being intimidated by Edward. Everyone is!" I threw my hands up in the air.
"He didn't tell me about any of this. That fucking liar!" I screamed.
I got off the bed and walked into the hallway. Before I knew what was happening I was in my car and pounding on Edward's front door. He gave me the code to the elevator, so I easily made my way upstairs. However, I lacked a key. I played with the knob to see if he left it unlocked; which, of course, he didn't, so I began to pound loudly until he answered.
He flung open the door and looked surprised to see me, I had so much anger building up inside of me, and little did he know he was about to get a taste of it.
"You lying son of a bitch!" I screamed when he finally closed the door and faced me.
He flinched and stepped back.
"Bella what's wrong?" His tone trying to be calm.
Is he insane? Did my outburst not indicate I was pissed? I thought it sure came across that way.
"What's wrong? WHAT'S WRONG?" I yelled in his face.
He moved even further away from me.
"Oh I don't know Edward?" I pretended to be deep in thought.
"Maybe the fact that you failed to mention that some slut went with you to Detroit, and that she WAS pregnant and you thought it was yours after, I don't know lying right to my face that it wasn't!" I shouted.
He looked thoughtful for a moment, as if he hadn't really wanted to admit he fucked up, which he did!
"Bella, calm down", he placed his hands on my shoulders, but I shook him off.
He had a lot of nerve touching me right now!
"Don't touch me!"
"Can you just hear me out?" He begged.
Was he serious? He didn't let me explain, he just took it upon himself to spank first and ask questions later.
"No because this is exactly the same thing that I got my ass spanked for, and it seems to be okay for you to not mention something, but not for me! You're a fucking hypocrite!" I poked his chest with my index finger.
He gave me a guilty look.
"Okay." His voice was eerily quiet.
"Okay?" My pitch increased.
Was that the best answer he could come up with? OKAY?
"You're right. I'm a hypocrite. Do you want to punish me?" And he had the nerve to smirk.
My mouth fell open and all the anger I was feeling, I used to shove him into the wall! Not in an 'I want to sex' you up kind of way. Oh no, in a 'you are so dead' kind of way. He thinks I'm a joke right now, doesn't he? What kind of punishment do you give someone who thinks he is above his own rules? What would hurt him the most, I couldn't really hurt him physically, so I would have to hurt him emotionally… But how?
"I do want to punish you and I know just how to hit you where it will hurt you most."
"So how do you want to punish me then?" He watched me carefully.
He mentioned once before that it kills him to not see me all the time, well maybe if I didn't work for him anymore that would be a way to get back at him.
"I quit." I hugged myself feeling victorious.
"What do you mean you quit?" His voice suddenly alarmed.
"I no longer want to work for you. So your punishment is going to be not seeing me every day." I was feeling rather proud on my logic.
"Bella, that's really not much of a punishment. I can see you every day regardless whether you work for my company or not. You need to do better than that." He seemed overly pleased with himself.
I wonder for the briefest moment if he thought I was quitting him and not the actually company? Then it occurred to me. He loves sex and if he thought he could find a way around me quitting, there was no way he could see around not having sex with me.
"No sex for the next two weeks." I gave a smug smile.
His eyes feel out his head, but he composed himself quickly.
"But I planned to introduce you to my playroom this weekend." He said so matter of factly.
"No sex." I refused to be persuaded by words like, playroom.
"Do you really think you could resist me for two whole weeks?" He gave me a sneaky smirk,
Sex was not my motivator, it was his. I had gone a long time without it since before I'd left Jake. The long hours we both were putting in at our jobs, neither of us had much energy for sex.
"Edward, I lived almost nine months without sex before you, I think I can handle it. It's not my punishment it's yours." I made sure he understood, sex wasn't something I needed, but he surely did.
"But that was nine months of not having sex with Jake, not me. I blow your mind, he can't compare." He seemed overly satisfied with himself
Yes, sex with him was mind blowing. Hell, I never thought it was possible to have that many orgasms in a row. I never realized how someone's tongue could do such amazing things. What am I doing right now? I'm getting all worked up. Get it together Swan!
"NO sex." I said again.
He thought about it for a few seconds and nodded his head glumly in agreement.
"Okay." I said softly, opened his front door and walked out.
I stood in front of the door for a minute to collect my thoughts and really put together what just happened in there. I just agreed to no sex for two weeks with the world's sexiest man, I must have lost my mind! Not only did I do that, but I also quit my job. What the hell was I thinking?
Sudden panic washed over me. I needed that job. It was my only way to prove that I could do something without help from someone else. I needed to make sure Edward would let me keep my job. I was banging on the door again.
He opened the door hesitantly, but gave me a small smile when I didn't scream at him.
"I um, I just wanted to know if I still have my, um job?" I bit my lip looking down at the ground.
"Bella I thought you were just kidding about quitting." He gave a small chuckle.
"I was, totally bluffing, but still I needed to make sure you understood that." I kicked my foot at an invisible rock.
He placed his long finger under my chin so that our eyes met. I looked into his emerald orbs feeling extremely drawn to him.
"Like I said, you don't have to work if you don't want to. But if you must, then you can. Okay?" He searched my eyes for agreement.
I nodded shyly and kissed his cheek. He smiled brightly at me. I went to leave again when he grabbed my elbow. I turned to stare at him and my heart just about broke. There was sadness there in his eyes, like me leaving was the end of the world.
"Have a goodnight." Was all he said, I gave another head nod and got into the elevator.
I woke up the next morning to my alarm clock blaring in my ear. I grudgingly got up and used the bathroom. I walked into the kitchen to make some coffee and Rose walked out in a suit. It was a tight gray suit that flared at the bottom just above her knee. She had a matching jacket just as tight with a red blouse peeking out from underneath. Her heels were a matching color and very high.
"Wow who are you looking so sexy for?" I joked.
She looked down at herself and back up at me.
"Is it too much? Should I change?" Her voice was sounding unusually insecure.
Rose never sounded unsure of herself; she was one of the most confident people I'd ever met.
"No, not at all, you just look, amazing." I said wowed.
"Really? Well today is the day I find out if I got the promotion to assistant editor. I'm so nervous." her hands shook at her sides.
"You will do great, you always do Rose! I know you will knock them dead!" I smiled at her.
"Thanks, I needed that." She smiled at me.
I handed her a cup of coffee and we talked for a few more minutes before she left. I made up a bowl of cereal and proceeded to my bedroom. I looked though my closet trying to decide what to wear when a brilliant idea hit me.
Edward was being punished with no sex, but I wouldn't make this the least bit easy on him. I skimmed through my wardrobe to find something that said professional, yet sexy, and there was a red dress that Rose purchased for me a while ago when I started job hunting; the tags were still on it. I pulled it out off the hanger and brushed my hand across the material. It was definitely a stretchy cotton. It was red with long sleeves and it stopped just above my knee, the top was embellished with lace. It was professional, yet sexy. I decided to top it off with my black 'come get me' heels.
I pulled my hair up in a high sleek ponytail; grabbed my keys and drove off to work. Once in my office I checked my phone for messages, but there weren't any. I was thankful for that. However, the paperwork seemed to have taken over my in box.
It was around 11am when I finally sorted through the mess on my desk. I could use a cup of coffee, so I made my way to the lunch room. For some reason I felt all eyes on me, it was more irritating than when I was in the lunch room with Edward. Maybe I should have quit, it would be better than being scrutinized so maliciously.
I tried to avoid the glances and just proceeded to get my coffee and go back to my office. Then out of nowhere or maybe it was just because I was so edgy, that I felt a pair of eyes staring me down. I quickly turned my head to find Reilly staring at me. I noticed how his eyes took in my entire body from head to toe with an admiring expression on his face.
He cleared his throat when he realized I'd caught him. He gave me a small smile.
"Hey Bella, um, how are you?" He almost stuttered.
"I'm fine Reilly, and you?" I asked pouring some creamer into my cup.
"You are fine, that's definitely true." He said under his breath.
"Excuse me?" I asked raising my eyes at him.
"I'm fine too." He nodded his head.
"Okay, well then I'll talk to you later." I said looking at him oddly.
"Um, Bella, wait!" He shouted.
I turned with an exasperated expression, letting him now I wasn't really in the mood to talk to him.
"What?" I gave me him annoyed look.
"I'm so sorry about the Halloween party. I really liked you, things just got out of hand. Would you be willing to give me another chance, I think we would be good together." He looked like a frightened child.
"Listen Reilly," instinctively, I touched my neck where the heart was hanging aka collar and knew what I needed to do.
"I'm with Edward, I'm sorry." I went to turn away but he gripped my free hand.
"He doesn't deserve you." He looked sad.
"Oh and your cheating ass does." This conversation was so over.
He just stared at me with no reply.
"That's what I thought." I pulled my hand free from him and walked away.
The whole conversation with Reilly frustrated me and I needed to find something different to focus on now. I placed the cup on my desk and went to photocopy a file when Corian, the coordinating manager on this floor stopped me.
"Bella could you please do me the biggest favor on earth." She looked overwhelmed and exhausted.
"Sure, what do you need?" I was more than willing to help her out.
Corian was one of the nicest people here, and I just couldn't say no. A habit Edward was starting to learn a little too well, I thought to myself.
"Could you bring this up to Emmett, I have like a thousand other things I need to do and he just called me for this, it would really help me out."
"Not a problem, I can do it now." I took the file from her and headed up to Emmett.
I stepped off the elevator and I realized that I hadn't spoken to Edward all day and that was unusual. But I didn't want to come off as needy, so I figured it was a good sign. When I walked past Leah's desk I noticed his office door was closed, but I guess that wasn't unusual.
Leah gave me a sweet smile and said hello. I said hello and headed to Emmett's office. I knocked before entering because after seeing my best friend in his lap, I had learned my lesson. I heard a few different voices, but one made my heart skip a beat, Edward.
I took a deep breath and knocked confidently on the office door. Emmett's booming voice yelled for me to come in. I opened the door slowly and suddenly felt like I was on display. There were five men in the room with him; and all eyes were focused on me, especially an intense pair of green ones.
I pretended not to feel intimidated by all the stares, but I was trembling on the inside. I was never one to like being the center of attention.
"Hey Bells, what brings you up here?" Emmett said brightly.
"Um, Corian asked if I could bring this up to you." I handed him the file.
"Thanks so much, I really needed this." He nodded with approval.
"You're welcome. Well if that's it, I will be going." I pointed toward the door.
I could feel Edward staring at me, but I didn't have the nerve to look at him. My whole body was on fire just from knowing he was in the room.
"No I'm good here, thanks again." Emmett held up the file.
I nodded my head and began to walk to the door, but knew I wouldn't get very far.
"Miss Swan." I heard Edward's velvety voice.
I turned to look at him and his face was a mixture of frustration and misery. I had no idea what that was about.
"Yes?" I squeaked out.
"Can I talk to you in the hallway for a minute?" He said through clenched teeth.
I gulped and nodded my head. He was pissed, but I wasn't sure why. I took a quick inventory of the room and saw how all the men in there looked at me. It was clear I had the same effect in here that I did on Reilly in the lunch room. Edward was going to rip my head off as soon as I walked out of here.
I slowly opened the door, but Edward flung it open and pushed me into the hall. He closed Emmett's door and dragged me down the hallway to his office. He opened the door shoved me in and slammed it behind him. I backed into the wall trying to avoid his angry glare.
He placed his hands against the wall on both sides of my body and glared at me with fiery eyes.
"Now please explain what the hell is up with your outfit!" He motioned in front of me with his hand.
"There is nothing wrong with my outfit?" I crossed my arms.
"Isabella, everything is wrong with this outfit. You have no idea what was going through the minds of those men in Emmett's office. I could have killed them all!" He growled at me.
"Wait." I put my hand up and began to start laughing.
"What are you laughing at? There is nothing funny about this! I demand you go home and change! Better yet, let's talk a walk across the street and get you something more, more…" He was so frustrated he couldn't speak a coherent sentence.
"More appropriate?" I mused.
"Exactly!" I swear I saw steam come out of his ears.
"Edward." I said gently placing my hands on his chest.
"It's not my fault if I look incredible and this dress hugs every curve I have. It's not my fault that men only think about one thing when a beautiful woman steps in the room. And finally, let them look, but they will never touch." I ran my finger down his chest and he shivered.
His eyes darkened and he kissed me passionately. I pulled him closer to me and felt his erection on my leg straining in his pants. Ah yes, the exact effect I was looking for. His mouth moved to my neck and he buried his teeth into the soft flesh biting gently.
"You are mine and nobody else's. It drives me crazy how they were staring at you." He tried to hike up my skirt and I almost let him, but then I remembered. Punished!
"Edward, stop!" I ordered and instantly his hands were gone.
He looked at me with a concerned expression.
"You're being punished remember?" I pointed at him.
"Fuck that, I want you!" He growled trying to continue his assault.
I placed my hands on his chest and shoved him away. He looked at me with surprise.
"I'm serious, you deceived me, and there will be consequences."I moved away from him and straightened out my skirt.
"Bella come on be reasonable. I'm sorry I didn't tell you." He pouted.
"Edward there are a lot of issues with this situation, do you see that?" Suddenly this was becoming a serious conversation.
"You can't punish me for something and expect me to let you off the hook for the same thing. Obviously, we have many issues to work out. I feel like there is so much you don't tell me, so much that you're hiding." You're rules were very specific, honesty and trust was the only way our relationship would work.
He thought about his reply carefully. He knew I was right, you could just tell from his rigid body language. For once, I had him where I wanted him, not the other way around.
"What is it you think I'm hiding?" He folded his arms and leaned against a cabinet.
"How did you get a hold of my resume the day you asked me to meet you here?"
"Bella, you gave it to HR when you were hired. Next".
"How do you know where I always am?"
He looked down at the floor and then back at me before answering.
"No more secrets right?" He said in a tired voice.
"No more secrets." I said in an even tone
"I pay someone to follow you." He looked guilty.
What the fuck? Did I seriously just hear him right?
"You pay someone to follow me? That's fucking stalking Edward!" I screamed at him.
"Bella, calm down, please." He put his hands up.
"Let's hear how you explain your way out of this one." I crossed my arms in anger.
"I feel very protective of you. You don't really know how scary this city can be when you're unprotected; I need to make sure you are safe."
In some sick way, he was trying to be my white knight, but I never asked him to save me. I never asked him to do anything.
"That's very twisted Edward. In other words you have been stalking me."
"I warned you."
"That makes it okay?" I thought you were kidding when you said that shit to me, I didn't really think you meant it!" I stomped my foot.
"I never did it to invade your life; he only keeps an eye on you when I can't."
"I have one father already, I don't need another! I'm not a child!" I yelled.
"Stop acting like one." He said pointedly.
"I don't have to listen to this. I can't believe you! Edward normal people don't do the things you do. They don't beat their girlfriend for looking through their phone or have someone follow her or buy her a car or give her a position she didn't earn!" I threw my hands in the air.
"You did earn your job; I wouldn't have given it to you if I thought you weren't capable of doing it. I told you I wasn't like other men. This is who I am Bella take it or leave it. Either way I can't change who I am." He exhaled loudly.
I really didn't put a lot of thought into any of this. He really wasn't what or who I expected. He was more than I bargained for. Something about this man tore at my heart.
I looked up at his tortured eyes and pulled him into my arms. I kissed him deeply pulling at his face. I couldn't get close enough; I couldn't feel him enough. His arms encircled my body pulling me into him tightly. He was broken; damaged and very seriously deranged, but I was so in love with him.
Yes he was a stalker and definitely strange, but we fit together. We belonged together. How could I walk away now?
I pulled away and looked at him breathless. He moved in to pull me back, but I pushed my arms in front of him to give us distance.
"What else are you keeping from me?" I said trying not to tear up.
"I have looked into your background." He said ashamed.
"Find anything?" I huffed.
"Nothing that you hadn't already told me." He said in a low hum.
"The text?" I crossed my arms again.
"She really isn't important, honestly. But I should warn you about her." His eyes held nothing but seriousness.
"Please don't tell me she has your love child or something." My eyes scrunched together.
He chuckled lightly before speaking again.
"She was a professor from Dartmouth, She is also my ex domme." He looked up cautiously at me.
"You fucked around with a professor? God Edward, how much older than you is she?" I gaped at him.
"She was only a few years older; one of the youngest professors at the school. You would never expect her to be the kinky bitch she is." He shook the memory away.
"How much older?"
"I was 18 when I started training with her, she was 25. So she is 35 now." He shrugged.
"That's not much of an age difference. She is the one in the picture." I looked down feeling insecure.
"I had forgotten that picture was still up. I don't really spend a lot of time in that part of the house. But I have removed it. I burned it actually." He laughed without humor.
"Why did you burn it?" I slowly stepped closely to him.
"She isn't worth the memory. Even talking about her now, she doesn't deserve your attention." He said harshly.
"Why are you so mad at her, because she ended it?" I was guessing, but the look that registered on his face told me exactly that.
"She rejected you?" I whispered.
"Yes." He spoke softly.
"Why?" I questioned.
"Does it matter? That was years ago Bella. All you should concern yourself with is the present." His irritated tone sounded in my ears.
"I want to know."
He contemplated for a moment about what he was going to say. You could tell this was something he probably rarely allowed himself to think about much less speak about, of course because he was used to having all the power.
"I asked her to marry me and she said no." His face turned hard.
I felt my heart shatter into a million pieces. Clearly not the answer I expected. He was in front of me in that moment holding my face in his hands. He rubbed soothing circles on my cheeks and searched my eyes for something.
"Bella, I was young and stupid then. I was so caught up in what I had with her that I thought it was love, but it clearly wasn't. I knew very little about relationships and I enjoyed the sex. What 18 year old guy wouldn't? But when I asked her, it wasn't out of love. It was out of loss. She told me I was the best fuck of her life, but I would never be worthy of her heart. Who says stuff like that?" The tension showed clearly on his face.
"You didn't love her?" I sounded so weak.
"No, not even then. I just didn't want it to end." He pulled me into his arms.
I pushed him away; tears began to fall down my cheek.
"I can't." I began to shake.
He reached for me again, but dropped his hands as he watched me walk closer to the door.
I held onto the door knob, but hesitated momentarily. I touched my neck out of habit and felt the diamond heart around my neck. He almost married someone for sex? So how could I ever believe he could love with his heart? I couldn't.
I moved my hands to the back of my neck and unlocked the necklace. I walked back to Edward and placed it in his hand. He gave me a shocked look and I closed his hand and kissed his cheek. Without another word I walked out of his office, out of his life...
Thought? I love reviews! Thanks for reading!