A/N Sorry for the late post today. Kids had early release from school so I didn't have much time in front of my computer. I haven't had a chance to really proofread either, so excuse any errors please!

Enjoy and please review!

Chapter 12 – The Lighthouse

As Bella went to stand up from the blanket, Edward reached down to her, hand extended in offer to help her rise. She was sure he was just being polite. It couldn't possibly mean to him what it did to her. The butterflies were back assaulting her stomach as she reached up with her left hand to grab hold of his right. He squeezed her hand as he helped her up. She was smiling up at him as she stood and suddenly lost her footing, falling forward. The only thing that kept her from taking a nosedive into the dirt was Edward's strong arms as her wrapped them around her, pulling her into his chest tightly.

Bella was mortified! She felt a deep blush color her neck and rise into her cheeks. "Oh my god! Edward I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to…" Her voice trailed off as she realized he was still holding her tightly, staring into her eyes. As she took in their depth, she saw a deep longing there, a need waiting to be filled. She felt one arm loosen its hold on her and started to back out of the embrace when the other hand pulled her in even tighter than before; their bodies flush against each other. The hand that had come free rose to meet her reddened face, lightly brushing against the heat that had risen in her cheeks.

The moment his thumb traced her cheekbone and jawline, she swooned, falling ever closer to him if that were even possible, her knees giving out slightly. He continued to hold her there, pressed up against him and they stared into each other's eyes. She felt like every nerve ending in her body was a live wire due to their close proximity and willed him to kiss her. She had never wanted a man as desperately and she wanted Edward right now.

She thought she heard him whisper something like "so beautiful" but her heart was pounding so hard in her chest that she could hear it pulsing though her ears, drowning out every other sound. He leaned into her causing her to close her eyes and tilt her face up to meet his lips. She couldn't imagine a better scene for her first kiss. Everything was perfect: the meadow, the wildflowers, the cool breeze playfully wrapping them in its own embrace, and most importantly, the man standing in front of her.

When their lips met, Bella felt like her body exploded. She could get close enough to him, even though they were already impossibly entwined together. She felt her hands reach up and wrap around his neck of their own accord and her fingers twisted into the hair there. When she felt his mouth slightly open under hers questioningly, she answered with a big exclamation point. She second their tongues found each other Bella heard Edward moan and felt a deep rumble within his chest. He did want this as much as she did, that much was now clear.

After another minute of the passionate kiss, Bella pulled back breathless and gasping for air. Edward moved his lips from hers down to her jawline. He proceeded to kiss his way up to her ear, lightly biting her lobe before sucking it into his mouth, sending uncontrollable shivers down her entire body. He pulled back slightly and whispered, "Bella Swan, you are the sexiest woman I have ever met in my life and right now I want you more than I want air to breathe but we can't do this here. Are you ready to come with me? You've shared your story with me Bella, now it's my turn. You need to know what you're getting yourself into."

Still breathing heavily, Bella just nodded and she looked into the endless depths of his eyes. She reluctantly untangled her fingers from his disheveled hair as he loosened his hold on her waist. Perhaps he saw the hurt in her eyes from having to separate or perhaps his lips moved on their own accord, but before Bella could even blink, his lips were against hers again, this time in a very chaste manner. He kissed her softly, sweetly, once, twice, then a third time before pulling back with a satisfied grin in his face. He released her completely and bent over to pick up the blanket on the ground. Once it was folded and put back in the backpack, Edward slipped it on his back and, to silence Bella's protests, winked at her.

…..

Edward could sense that Bella was going to argue about him carrying her bag for her. Without even thinking, he winked at her hoping to silence her protest. What he didn't expect was for Bella's knees to fall out from underneath her. He'd always been quick on his feet, so he reached and caught her before she could do any real damage, but this time, instead of holding onto her to help her steady herself, he bent down and swept at her knees, pulling her into his arms and close to his chest, cradling her gently.

"Edward! What are you doing? Put me down!" Bella was blushing from the collar of her shirt up into her hairline but Edward just laughed and started walking back toward the house, Bella wrapped securely in his arms.

"Bella, I'm not sure what just happened back there, but I'm not setting you down. It looked like you nearly fainted and I would never forgive myself if you got hurt hiking back to the house. Plus, now that I've got you here, I can't stand the thought of letting you go." Edward's mouth twisted up in a cocky half smile causing Bella's breath to catch in her throat. Seeing her reaction to him only made the smile grow wider and he leaned forward pressing his lips to hers again. He felt her arms go around his neck and heard a sigh of content escape her perfect lips.

It only took an hour to get back to the house despite the fact the he carried Bella the entire way. He wasn't kidding when he told her he didn't want to let her go. When they got to the edge of the trees however, he knew he needed to put her down. Neither of them needed the twenty questions that would surely be awaiting them if they walked up to the house like this. He stopped and waited until Bella looked up into his eyes. Finally, she looked around and saw they were back already and looked back at him and nodded, understanding that he meant to set her on her feet.

After carefully setting her down he leaned in for another quick kiss before taking her hand and leading her toward the house and out of the cover of the trees. When the reached the back porch, he told Bella he just needed to run in and grab his car keys and that he would meet her by his car out front. He jogged up to his room on the second floor, grabbed his keys, and then headed off to find his mom.

He found her working in her office and quietly knocked on the door to gain her attention. "Oh, Edward. I didn't expect you back so soon. How did things go?"

"Fine mom. Um, Bella and I are going to go for a drive to Point Wilson. We still want to talk about things, but we needed a change of scenery. I'm not sure what time we'll be back. Could you call and let Chief Swan know that she's okay and I'll have her back sometime tonight?" Edward was trying desperately to ignore the joyous smirk radiating on Esme's face as she agreed.

Edward made a hasty retreat and went to find Bella so they could leave. When he got outside, he noticed Bella was already sitting in the passenger seat of his Volvo. He loved his car because it offered comfort, speed, and safety, but seeing Bella sitting there so innocently waiting for him, he realized that without her there, it meant nothing anymore.

He walked around the car and slid into the driver's seat smiling at the look of adoration on Bella's face. He only got about halfway down the dirt road leading to the highway when Edward pulled to the side and put the car in part. Bella was about to ask what he was doing but he just couldn't stand the separation any longer and accosted her again with his lips.

Pulling back finally, he smiled a little sheepishly and apologized to her, explaining that he couldn't make a two-hour drive with no motivation. Bella laughed whole-heartedly and told him there was no need to apologize for kissing her; that he could claim her lips whenever he felt the urge.

Satisfied, he pulled back onto the drive before reaching for Bella's hand and entwining their fingers together. They drove hand in hand for the next two hours as he asked her questions about her life before Forks. He wanted to know absolutely everything about this woman and was determined to learn it before they reached the lighthouse.

…..

Point Wilson was absolutely breathtaking. Literally! Bella felt the air rush out of her lungs and she saw where it was that Edward was taking her. "Edward, this place is beautiful! How did you find this place?" She could feel the smile spread over her face and the heat rise in her cheeks. His answering smile was just as beautiful as their surroundings.

The lighthouse was very rustic but beautiful just the same. The walls of the building were pristine white and the roof was a beautiful rust red color, causing a gorgeous contrast. It looked as if the scene in front of here was a painting in a fairy tale. Bella began to wonder what the view from the top of the tower look like, thinking it would be amazing to climb up there and see for herself, so she was a little shocked when Edward went right up to the station keeper's door and rang the bell.

"Edward, what a nice surprise! How are you son?" The station keeper was a jolly old man about Edward's height. He had graying hair and yellowing teeth, but it all just added to his charm.

"I'm great Sam, thanks. Um… this is my girlfriend Bella and I was hoping she and I could spend a few hours up on the lookout post. Would that be okay?" Bella was so shocked at Edward's statement that she was his girlfriend, she didn't even notice her knees getting weak again until she felt Edward's arm wrap tightly around her waist. She turned to look at him and he winked again, grinning her with that sexy smirk. Had his arm not been securely wrapped around her, she would have melted to the ground right there on the spot.

Sam gave his permission for the two of them to head up to the observation deck and told them to let him know if they needed anything. He patted Edward on the back before going back inside. The moment the door clicked shut behind him, Edward was beside her, swooping her into his arms again and placing a not so chaste kiss on her lips and he started to ascend the stairs toward the observation deck.

When they reached the top, Edward set her back on her feet and joined their hands again, this time leading her to a bench against the wall where they both sat down. The mood suddenly turned somber and Bella knew that Edward was about to tell Bella his story. She squeezed his hand tightly in hers, telling him without words that it would be okay.

…..

When Bella squeezed his hand as we were sitting on the bench, he believed that everything would work out. He was so terrified on the drive over to tell her his secrets, afraid of what she would think of him if she knew the truth. All of that changed when she gripped his hand. There was a calmness exuding from her pores and into him. Through her grip, she was telling him that she would understand anything he had to tell her and that she would forgive him for it.

He took three deep breaths and then began his story. "Bella, did Esme tell you that I'm not their biological son?" Bella simply nodded, urging him to continue with another squeeze of his hand. "Did she tell you anything else?" When she shook her head no, he went on.

"I've been with Esme and Carlisle for just over two years. When I was fifteen, I was sort of a troublemaker. I always had to have my hand in the cookie jar so to speak. One night my parents decided to go out for a night on the town. We lived in Seattle at the time so there was a lot more to do there than in Forks. They left me home by myself, trusting me to be responsible. After all, I was a month away from turning sixteen. I week before had finally asked out Jessica Stanley, a girl in my class. When she found out my parents were going out, she suggested she come over but she needed a ride."

This was the hardest part of the story. He took another deep breath before continuing. "My dad always left the keys in the kitchen drawer, so I told her I could borrow his car to pick her up. I had been learning to drive for the past several months and felt I could handle it easily. I grabbed the keys, climbed into his car, and left for Jessica's house. It only took a few minutes to pick her up and start back home. We were only a mile from my house when I looked over to see Jessica smiling at me. She reached her hand over and started massaging my manhood through my pants. No one had ever touched me like that before and I was intrigued so I didn't stop her. She took off her seatbelt, turned in her seat, and unbuttoned my pants. Once I was free of them, she bent her head down and took me into her mouth. It felt so good that I closed my eyes briefly and rested my head against the back of the seat. That's the last thing I remember from that night."

A few tears were falling down his face, but he kept talking, determined to tell Bella the truth; she deserved to know everything. "I guess when my eyes were closed, I drifted into the other lane and collided with another car head on. Jessica was thrown from the car because she had removed her seat belt and she died before they got her to the hospital. No one would tell me about the people in the other car though. I woke up two days later in a room by myself wanting my parents to tell me everything was going to be okay. They never came though. The car I hit was my mother's car. Both of them were killed instantly. I found out only when I demanded that the nurse get my parents. She didn't know what to tell me, so she had a police officer come in to break the news. I killed three people that night and it devastated me.

"After I got out of the hospital, I went into a tailspin so to speak. I did everything I could to destroy myself for destroying their lives. I started drinking and doing drugs. I ran away from foster home after foster home looking for any trouble I could find. I was placed with Carlisle and Esme, authorities thinking that if I got out of Seattle, everything would be better. It wasn't though. Finally, one day it all got to be too much. I had no one I could talk to and the grief was eating me alive. Esme tried, but I just couldn't talk to her. I figured if my parents and Jessica's lives were cut short, mine should be too. After all, it was my fault, so I went into the kitchen and grabbed a steak knife. Before I even knew what I was doing, I was in the bathtub, my wrists pouring out my lifeblood and I was losing consciousness. I guess that's when Esme found me and called Carlisle.

"Carlisle saved my life even though I didn't deserve it. Afterwards I was put into a mental institution for several months. They tried to treat the depression and the guilt by giving me meds and forcing me into therapy. Finally, they realized that nothing was working and Carlisle and Esme came to talk to me. I don't know how they did it, but they talked me into coming home to them and finishing my therapy there; no more doctors, no more medications, no more forced sessions where I had to talk about my feelings. They told me that I was almost an adult and should be treated like one. They also made that point that if I was going to be treated like an adult, I needed to act like an adult and take responsibility for my actions. Instead of trying to kill myself, I should do more to help others so that's what I did. I became a volunteer at the hospital and an operator on the teen-suicide help line. I started to realize that there were people who where worse off than me and I didn't have the option to take the easy way out anymore. I may have still wanted to, but I knew I couldn't. I've wanted to for two years and nothing changed that; nothing until the day you walked into my life. I finally felt I had something to live for even if I didn't know how to act on it.

"Bella, for the last two months you've become my life. Every time I close my eyes, I see your face. I go out of my way at school just to see you pass by in the halls. I wanted to approach you so badly, but I didn't know how; I didn't know what to say. When I saw you lying in the meadow today it only solidified my feelings for you. Bella, you make me want to live just so I can learn everything there is to know about you. Even when I know everything, it will never be enough. Will you let me be in your life Bella?"

…..

He looked so unsure when he asked her if he could be in her life; so vulnerable. She couldn't answer him though because her words were trapped in her throat. The emotions he made her feel swirled through her entire body, mind, and soul; through every fiber of her being. That's when it struck her; she was in love with Edward Cullen. No, she couldn't answer him using words so instead, she climbed into his lap and kissed him until her head felt like it was going to explode.