"So what's on your mind, right now?" He wonders.
"Probably the same thing that's on yours."
"Bed can be used for more than just sleeping?"
"Yeah."
"We should be asleep."
"We should be in our own beds. We should just be partners. We should know better. We should be a lot of things, but we're not."
"We can be something else, if you want."
"You know what I want. You always know what I want," she points out.
"I try," he admits.
"Can't you just give me what I want?"
"Tonight?" His eyebrows nearly touch his hairline.
"Do you have somewhere better to be?" she wonders.
"No, but does it have to be tonight?"
"Why does it matter?"
"I'm not prepared," he reveals.
"I'm already pregnant," she reminds him.
"I meant mentally," he clarifies.
"For what? It's not like I'm a black widow spider. I am not going to eat you, when I'm done with you."
"I just want it to be right. I want it to be everything that we imagined that it would be."
"You are being a sissy."
"Wow you really know how to sweet talk a man."
"Please."
"Ziva..."
"I am not going to break."
"I know that."
"Is it because you're afraid that..."
"No."
"You don't even know what I was going to say."
"It's not because you're pregnant. I just want to wait."
"We have waited long enough!"
"One more night isn't going to kill you."
"And if it does?"
"You can come back to haunt me," he tells her.
"Why do you want to wait?"
"You'll make fun of me."
"I already do, on a daily basis."
"I don't want to say."
"Tony, stop being ridiculous."
"I want it to be special."
"Special? You sound like such a girl."
"See what I mean? To be honest, I think you just want to get it over with."
"So?"
"Go to sleep."
"You expect me to be able to sleep? Now I'm frustrated."
"Tell it to your dreams. I'm going to sleep."
"You can go to sleep, just like that?"
"Sure, why not?"
"Please?"
"No, go to sleep. You're too tired, anyway."
"How would you know?"
"Because you've been up for forever. Go to sleep."
"What if I don't want to?"
"That's too bad."
"I'm just going to lie here, wide awake, until..."
He cuts her off, "Suit yourself, but in five minutes I'll be asleep. You know what that means? You won't be able to sleep. I know how much you hate my snoring. You'll be awake all night, and then in the morning you'll be cranky. You'll be cranky, and you won't even want to talk to me. It just prolongs the process. Besides it is probably better to rest before we involve ourselves in such a serious undertaking, don't you think?"
"You think that I'm going to fall asleep, halfway through, or something?"
"I didn't say that."
"But you were thinking it, weren't you?"
"Please just go to sleep."
"Why are you so insistent on me going to sleep?"
"Because."
"Because why?"
"I like watching you sleep."
"Why would you watch me sleep?"
"You look very peaceful, until you start snoring. So for about five minutes, you look peaceful."
"Is that supposed to be a compliment, or an insult?"
"It's the truth. Now close your eyes."
"Fine, but I'm not going to sleep," she rolls over, to the edge of the bed.
"You'll fall off, if you sleep all the way over there," he warns.
"I don't want to crowd you."
"I would prefer that you didn't wake up with a head injury."
"I'm fine."
"Move over here," he whines.
"Why?"
"Because I am asking you to."
"Why? You don't want to have sex."
"That doesn't mean I don't want you close to me."
"Why..."
He cuts her off, "Scoot over here."
"No."
"Fine, I'm too tired to argue," he relents.
He waits until she falls asleep. She starts to snore, and he reaches over, and rolls her over, onto her other side, so that she's facing him, and if she rolls she'll roll towards him, instead of off the bed, into the bedside stand, onto the floor. It was surprising, actually, because she didn't resist him. She didn't fight, like he had expected. Instead she goes where he wants her to. That was the beauty of sleep. You did things in your sleep you would never do awake. He rolls onto his side, to face her. He looks at her for a moment.
"Goodnight," he whispers.
She doesn't respond. Clearly she was out. She takes a breath, that ends up as a snore. He puts the extra pillow over his head, and closes his eyes.
She lays still for several minutes. She pretends to snore. She waits until he's asleep. He begins to snore. Her eyes pop open. She looks over at him. She scoots towards him. She puts one hand between her face, and her pillow. The other hand she rests on his arm. She closes her eyes, and goes to sleep.
He wasn't the only one who wanted to be close. She just wasn't ready to admit, exactly how much she needed him. How much she wanted him near her. He wasn't the only one who wished that she had chosen differently that night. She would have chosen him, if she had it to do over again. If she could wake up in the past, and take it back, she would. But this wasn't a dream, it was real, and there was no taking it back. Not now, not ever.