Chapter 4

It was late and the other two were finally in bed, although Kaiba somehow doubted they were sleeping. Or if they were sleeping the chances of either of them staying asleep for long were pretty slim. His whole being felt exhausted as he took a deep breath in and stepped out into the garden. The cool chill of the night air was refreshing. For a few long moments he allowed himself to get completely lost in it, then the distant sound of screaming ripped through the calm and set every inch of his body on edge.

Lowering his head slightly he counted the number of screams which followed the first. Eight; that meant Tristan was with him now and Kaiba didn't have to deal with it. Not this time. A part of him felt bad for thinking that way, but he couldn't help it, the situation was just getting worse and there was nothing he could do about it.

'Hi Kaiba.'

The sound of her voice startled him slightly. Turning he saw Catilin watching him from the corner of the room. She held his gaze for a moment, before shifting it away. A mixture of anger and curiosity filled him as he pulled himself back inside.

'What are you doing here?'

'Watching you,' her voice was as strangely honest as she was, 'I've been watching you for a while now. I thought you wanted to put Crovell in charge, but you haven't done a thing to even try for ages. You just act all weird and...' she shifted her gaze towards the door leading into the rest of the mansion, 'so do they. This palace feels weird too.'

'It's not a palace,' Kaiba rolled his eyes, 'and I don't appreciate the fact you've been spying on us.'

'Duke said it was wrong of me,' Catilin placed her hands behind her back and began twisting her toe against the ground like some kind of naughty school kid, 'that's why I came here to apologise. I know it was wrong of me, but I saw a little of that hell future and I don't want things to end up like that. So if Crovell needs to be in charge then I want to help get him there. I thought that's what you wanted too.'

'It is,' Kaiba sighed, 'but right now there are more important things going on. Besides, Crovell's still a brat of a baby right now, even if he was in control tomorrow it wouldn't make that much of a difference.'

'So you're waiting on purpose then?'

Kaiba shrugged and folded his arms. He wasn't totally sure he liked having this conversation with her, but at the same time his attention had been so focused on other things he'd almost forgotten Crovell even existed, never mind anything else; so it was nice to be reminded of that situation again.

'I am sorry I've been watching you,' Catilin tilted her head to one side, 'and I'm also sorry for not trusting you to know what you're doing. I just thought... I thought you'd be doing something to help Crovell sooner rather than later. I didn't even think about him not being able to do much as a baby, why would I? He's a pretty smart baby you know; he can do things, lots of things. So I just thought...'

'Do you ever just shut up?' Kaiba cut her off. 'I don't care what you have to say. I don't care why you think you're here or what you want from me or any of it. In case you hadn't worked this out Catilin, I don't particularly like you. Everyone else might be able to forget what you've done, but I can't. You're the last person in the whole multiverse I'd want help from. So just forget whatever reason it is you think you're here for and just leave me and my family alone.'

'But...'

'No buts Catilin; I can't stand you or the way you talk or what you are or what you represent. I simply cannot stand you. And I want you to leave now.'

'I...' Catilin's face fell. 'Okay, I'm sorry, I won't bother you again.'

'Good, see that you don't.'

Angrily he knocked the clock onto the floor and turned away from it. Having to deal with nonsensical timepieces was just frustrating when he knew most of his memory was intact. Because when most of his memory was intact he could actually remember what it was like to tell the time. He could remember little things, like the difference between a twelve hour and a twenty-four hour clock. He could remember how old he was when he first learnt to tell the time. Hell he even could remember the exact details of what his first watch looked like, but the one thing he couldn't remember was how to actually do it. And maybe it was just because the numbers themselves no longer made sense to him, but he always felt like it was more than that.

Well, maybe he felt like it was more than that when he had enough memory to remember the details of his first watch. When most things were just there ready and accessible to him, the little things which bothered him really bothered him. But when most things were gone, like they had been a few hours earlier, he didn't really care. As he flipped himself back onto his back and stared up at the ceiling, his mind began circling some pretty deep thoughts. In the state he was in now he could remember what it was like to remember nothing just as clearly as he could remember what it was like to know everything he was supposed to know. A weird sensation moved through him, disconnecting him from his mindless self and reaching out towards the person he used to be.

An almost ironic laugh pushed itself out of him; he'd spent a long time running away from himself and now he'd give anything just to run towards it. It was crazy, but at the same time... He half closed his eyes and began to focus on the movement of his chest. Breathing was such an easy thing to do. It didn't require any memory or knowledge of yourself; it was just something you did without really thinking about it. He found the idea strangely comforting and in the haze of weariness which was his mind he found himself fixating on each and every breath he took.

'If only sleeping was like breathing,' his eyes fully closed as if he was trying to lull himself into some sort of trance. 'If only sleeping was something you could just do without thinking about it. I know it should be, but it never is. After all, you plan for sleep. When you go to bed at night you plan to sleep. You don't plan to breathe, you just do it. And if sleeping really were like breathing, that's what I'd be doing right now,' his mind began to drift lazily, 'and what's more, I wouldn't wake up, ever. Then I wouldn't have to worry about anything. You don't have problems when you sleep; you just have problems getting there,' his voice developed a strangely heavy tone as he felt himself almost sink down into the mattress beneath him. 'You don't need to remember things when you sleep. You don't need to know who you are, you just sleep and that's it, your subconscious takes over and everything's fine,' he gave a heavy sigh and rolled onto his side. 'Sleep… please let me sleep.'

The room was dark, lit only by a single strobe light flashing in time to the loud, obscure music playing all around her. There was something familiar about this place. Its atmosphere and music lured her in, driving a strange kind of free energy through her body. She wanted to dance. No, it was more than that; she needed to dance and with every fluid movement her body made her whole being just buzzed. She wasn't alone either. Either side of her and close enough for her to feel the heat steaming off of their bodies were two fellow dancers; one male, one female. They danced with the same kind of invigorating energy she had and it only made her sense of careless freedom grow.

She didn't know where this place was or why they were there, but she knew they were alone. No one lurked in the shadows. No one sat behind the turntables spinning out obscure song after obscure song. No one was at the bar buying drinks. No one else was on the dance floor. It was just the three of them and if she allowed herself to think about it for too long it might have concerned her. But she didn't think about it; she couldn't. Her senses... her whole being was filled with the energy created by their dancing.

Without warning they both grabbed hold of her hands and led her across the room. Their touch alone made her body ache with a kind of longing she'd never experienced before. It's why she wasn't afraid to follow them. Why she didn't question them laying her gently over a table. Why she savoured every single kiss he gave her, even though she knew they were using it as a distraction.

When she felt the cold edge of steel press against her stomach she didn't cry out or feel afraid. Instead she lifted her arm up and placed her hand behind his head, deepening the kisses they were sharing. As she felt the blade penetrate her skin, a small smile tugged at her lips. She felt pain and discomfort as the knife sliced through her, but it really didn't bother her. Somewhere in her head she knew they had to do this. Somewhere in her head she knew she wanted them to do this.

The slicing sensation stopped and was replaced by the strange sensation of something reaching into her and tugging on something. Something inside of her. Something important. Something which they needed to take out...

Mai gasped as she shot up into a sitting position. For half a second she found herself paralysed with terror, before wrapping both of her arms protectively around her stomach.

'Joey...' her voice was little more than a fearful whisper as she stared down at him, 'Joey, wake up.'

He didn't stir.

'Joey,' she forced herself to reach a hand out towards him and shake him, 'Joey, please wake up.'

He groaned, rolled over and remained asleep.

'Joey,' she shook him harder, 'Joey I need you to wake up.'

'What is it?' Joey rubbed his face as he slowly came round. 'Mai, are you alright?' He sat up the second he saw the look on her face.

Mai just sat there shaking her head for a few moments.

'Mai...'

'Oh god,' she fell into his arms, 'I think I've lost her.'

'What?' Joey sounded confused.

'Something's wrong,' she couldn't keep the fear out of her voice, 'I know something's wrong. Oh god, I think I've lost her. I think I've lost her.'

'I... I don't understand,' Joey's voice trembled slightly, 'what are you saying?'

'I think I've lost her. I think I've lost her. I think I've lost her.'

'Lost who?' He swallowed hard. 'Mai please, you're scaring me.'

'Get me to a hospital; you have to get me to a hospital. Please. Please. I think I've lost her. Oh god...'

'Mai... I don't understand... what... what are you trying to say?'

'I think I lost her,' she sobbed, 'I think I've lost our baby.'