Chapter 13

Kaiba sucked a deep breath in and cautiously opened the door to his brother's room. Mokuba was crouched in the corner, defacing yet another part of the wall with one of his nightmarish pictures. Although picture probably wasn't quite the right word for it; they were more like the deformed doodles of a psychotic five year old. The type a teacher would get all bent out of shape about before suggesting to the child's parents they probably needed counselling.

Well Mokuba definitely needed counselling, but his tendency towards violence and using his own powers in that violence had prevented Kaiba from taking that root. The first for fear of what it would mean for his brother, the second for fear of what it would mean for the rest of them. The magical exposure in their Realm had been kept intentionally minimalised in order to protect the developing nations of children. It was why most Silkoneons and Odraians still hadn't reconnected with the family and friends they'd left behind. They were choosing to keep themselves isolated; it was a choice Kaiba could relate to and one the Pure had insisted he respected.

'I've eaten today if that's what you're wondering,' Mokuba interrupted his train of thoughts as he continued to etch his drawing into the wall. 'If it doesn't make me ill, I might think about eating again tomorrow.'

'That's not why I'm here.'

'Then why are you here? To stare at the face of a monster perhaps?'

'You're not a monster Mokuba.'

'You're right, I'm a demon.'

'Mokuba...'

'Where's Tristan?' Mokuba's voice was dull and almost callous.

'He went out.'

'You let him leave? Was that really such a good idea?'

'He's not a prisoner here,' Kaiba averted his gaze.

'Are you sure about that? I hear you fighting you know. I know he thinks he's a prisoner here and I know why. You're both so stubborn.'

'Mokuba...?'

'Why were you in the garden last night?'

'Huh?' Kaiba frowned at the sudden change in conversation.

'I heard you in the garden last night. Why were you out there?'

'It's not important.'

'Your tone suggests otherwise,' Mokuba shifted his position in order to add to what he was drawing. 'Shut up in here, I hear a lot more than you think. And because of that I know a lot more than you think. All those little things I couldn't see before, I see them now. And more... so much more... so much more its hurts. The nightmares...'

'I was dealing with some trespassers,' Kaiba cut him off, not wanting his brother to freak himself out.

'Who were they?'

'I don't know and, to be honest, I don't care. They're gone now.'

'You're lying,' Mokuba's voice curiously certain, 'you do care who they are. They unnerve you.'

'You are aware you're tapping into Win's powers right now, right?' Kaiba gritted his teeth and lowered his head.

'So? Isn't that what you and Tristan wanted me to do? Or do you not like it because I'm using the powers against you and not for you?'

'Mokuba...'

'Mokuba, Mokuba, Mokuba,' his brother mocked, 'you're so pathetic, you know that? You both are. Bitching and whining and moaning, because you're both so stubborn. Too stubborn to talk about what really matters. I saw your future. I saw the men you both become. The time you waste talking but not connecting. Not saying what really matters. Not admitting what's really important. Hollow men. Walking shells. Living death. That's what you become. That's what you let yourselves become.'

'Mokuba...'

'Leave me alone,' Mokuba cut him off, 'I want to be alone.'

'But...'

'Leave me alone,' he flicked an energy ball into his hand, 'I want to be alone.'

'I'm sorry, are we keeping you from something?' Téa cocked an eyebrow as she watched Tristan check his watch for the fifth time in ten minutes.

'No.'

'Then stop checking the time every five seconds.'

'Do you always have to exaggerate,' he rolled his eyes.

'I'm not exaggerating,' she mocked a pout, 'anyone would think you didn't want to spend time with me.'

'Well if you made spending time with you less of a headache I might not feel the need to be somewhere else all the time.'

'I'm not sure whether or not I should be insulted by that.'

'Be insulted,' he shrugged, before turning his attention to Yugi. 'You've been kind of quiet, you okay?'

'Yeah I'm fine.' Yugi shifted his gaze away. 'It's kind of chilly out here, don't you think? Maybe we should head back to yours; I'd love to see Mokuba.'

'Yeah, so would I,' Téa leant back against the picnic table they were sat on, 'he's been even harder to get hold of than you these last few months.'

'Sorry, that's a no go zone,' Tristan averted his gaze as he took a swig out of the can of coke he was drinking.

'A no go zone?' Téa frowned. 'What do you mean by a no go zone?'

'He's been a little... under the weather recently,' Tristan fidgeted.

'And seeing his friends would somehow make him worse because...?'

'Because it would,' he snapped, 'can't you just accept that as an answer?'

'Not when there's clearly something weird going on,' Téa narrowed her gaze on him. 'And not just with Mokuba, with you too.'

'There's nothing weird going on with me,' he was starting to get agitated now. 'I thought we came here to hang out, not so you could interrogate me.'

'This isn't an interrogation,' Téa held her hands up, 'this is just general curiosity.'

'Whatever, would you just lay off it already?'

'Fine,' Téa rolled her eyes. 'So are you doing anything with your parents later? I mean, this is a big one, right; so seeing your parents has to be pretty mandatory.'

'Huh, what are you talking about?' Tristan blinked at her.

'Your birthday, you idiot,' she shook her head, 'it's one of those big, important landmark ones, right? So are your parents doing anything with you later?'

For a few long moments he just stared at her. Then he hid most of his face behind his can as he took another swig and shifted his gaze away.

'Tristan...' Téa hesitated, almost ridiculing herself for wanting to ask the question. 'Tristan,' she forced the words out, 'you do know how old you are today, right?'

'What…?' Tristan began choking on his drink. 'What kind of a question is that?'

'I... I know it's stupid and insulting and... whatever for me to ask, but... the way you've been acting... It's like you don't really know what today is.'

'Today is my birthday,' his tone was as unreadable as the look on his face, 'and I was trying to enjoy it.'

'I know and I'm not trying to stop you from enjoying it, I... I just get this feeling something's wrong with you.'

'Wow Téa, you're so super sensitive, you know that? I mean, it's not as though I'm still recovering from severe depression or anything,' Tristan was starting to sound angry. 'Of course there's something wrong with me; normal people don't have a dozen or more suicide attempts under their belt. But, gee, thanks for reminding me I'm not normal.'

'I...'

'Wow Téa, I really have to agree with Tristan on this one,' there was a vague note of amusement in Yugi's voice, 'you are being pretty insensitive here.'

'I... I didn't mean that kind of wrong,' Téa was starting to feel really bad for bringing this up. 'I... I just think there's something wrong with your memory, that's all.'

'And exactly what are you basing this on?' Tristan gritted his teeth.

'The... the fact you couldn't remember bumping into Serenity or how to get home yesterday and... and the fact you... you don't seem to remember how old you are.'

'Who says I don't remember?'

'Because...' Téa swallowed hard and tried to sound more confident than she felt, 'because you still haven't told me how old you are.'

'And that's all the proof you need is it?' Tristan got to his feet. 'You know Téa, thanks for reminding me exactly why I can't stand hanging out with you anymore. Because you're constantly looking for some kind of explanation, some reason why I'm not the Tristan you remember. You want something you can fix so things can go back to the way they used to be and you can pretend like the last year never happened. Well guess what Téa, that's never going to happen. I'm never going to go back to being the Tristan you used to know. The Tristan you used to know died long before I ever contemplated taking my life for the first time. This is the Tristan you have now. The only Tristan that's left. Accept me. Accept me!'

'I... I do accept you,' she stared at him.

'Funny that, because it really doesn't feel like it,' he turned away from her.

'Tristan...'

'I'm going home,' he started walking away. 'Just do me one last little favour Téa; don't you ever come and see me again.'

He'd been so agitated walking away from them like that, it had taken him a while before he realised he didn't recognise where he was. Coming to a stop he stared around the unfamiliar streets and tried to work out if he didn't recognise them because he'd never been there before or... His teeth gritted tightly together as he tried to ignore the second half of his own train of thoughts.

Instead he reached his hand into his pocket and pulled out his mobile phone. His fingers hovered over the buttons for a few moments, before he sighed and pocketed the phone again. He couldn't keep doing this. He couldn't keep calling for help every single time he got into trouble. If he just calmed down and focused for a moment he could figure out where he was and then he could figure out how to get home from here. All he had to do was focus.

Unfortunately for him he was still really agitated from the argument he'd had with her. That agitation was making it almost impossible for him to relax, which made the streets around him become less and less familiar by the second. Panic was slowly starting to sink in causing him to forget why he'd become so agitated to begin with. As his mind cleared the only certainty he ever had began flashing inside of him like the obvious answer. He reached for his phone again, unlocked it and scrolled for the number he instinctively knew he needed. After pressing the dial button he held it to his ear and listened to it ring. On the third ring someone answered.

'So where are you now?'