From Earth to Barcelona

by roboblob

9 teens, a married couple, a mad man with a box, self inserts, and crude and pervy humor and language all combine to make this story. Story format for the first and last chapters. Script format is used everywhere else. Episode 1 in a series of 7.

9. Chapter 9: In Which Joe Knows Too Much

(They turn to see a ship)

Doctor: Ah. A-

Joe: What? Daleks? Cybermen? Atraxi? Raxaoricofallapatorians,more specifically the Slitheen family? Judoon? Hoix? Weevils? Uvodni? Sycorax? Silurians? Autons? Roboform? The actual Nestene Conciousness itself? Chelonians? Drahvins? Zygons? Terileptils? Draconians? Haemogoths? The Terrible Zodin? Omega? Salamander?

Doctor: You left out one race that if you said it, you'd be right. It's a Sontaran ship. Becca, feel tall. Sontarans are short compared to humans.

Becca: How tall?

Doctor: About 1-2 feet shorter than you. San Agustin, feel tall too.

(Joe stands on his tiptoes)

Becca: Stand straight.

Joe: Yes sir.

Abanoub: How do you know all of those alien races?

Joe: Long story.

Miguel: So what do we do now that Barcelona is in ruins?

Joe: I suggest we run. Run so far away. Let's run. Let's run all night and day.

Doctor: No. Sontarans would make this planet a whole desert. There must be something wrong here.

Abanoub: So we just walts in there and find out what's going on?

Doctor: No we go into the TARDIS, materialize into the ship for a quicker way, and then walts in and find out what's going on.

Abanoub: Okay.

Doctor: Alright. Everyone into the TARDIS.

Voice: Doctor wait!

Doctor: River?

(River Song runs to the Doctor)

Doctor: Hello River.

River: Hello sweetie.

Abanoub: Sweetie? They married?

Amy: Not sure, but they do have unsynchronized timelines.

Doctor: What are you doing here?

River: Following your trail.

Rory: Why are you doing that?

River: Spoilers. I came here and saw all the dead bodies.

Doctor: Sontarans don't kill people.

River: Let me finish. Then I see the Sontaran ship and ponder about the same thing and then I heard your TARDIS materialize.

Doctor: Well that's quite a story Song but if you want to explore more, I suggest you come into the TARDIS.

River: What do you think I was going to do? Walk all the way back there?

Amy: Don't you have your vortex manipulator?

River: Battery's charging.

Doctor: It's from the 51st Century! How can the battery be charging?

River: When you tamper with 21st Century technology!

Doctor: Why were you tampering your Vortex Manipulator with 21st Century technology?

River: Why do you tamper with any century technology with that sonic screwdriver of yours?

Doctor: Because it's fun.

River: Then that's my reason.

(They walk into the TARDIS)