The Heretic anthem

The night of Misato's and Asuka's party, Seele met to discuss the recent mis-calculation.

"This is impossible," voiced the opinion of one member.

"And yet we must accept the impossible and determine how it came to be."

"This," a third member held up a binder, passing it to the man on his left, "may shed some light on the matter." Each looked over it briefly, passed it on, till it reached the Chairman.

Finally, the Chairman spoke. "Ryoji Kaji...This is how Ikari knew of the attack on Nerv Headquarters."

"And knowing that, he sallied Task 02: the second children."

"In the meantime, let us approve the long delayed repairs on Unit-00. Now that Ikari has Unit-02, he will have no reason to continue this blasphemous trespass– using his son as the instrument. Unit-01 will be frozen."

"This man," the member, who had first presented the folder, re-oriented the conversation, "was part of the Adolescent Re-adjustment program at Tresor–" every face tensed "–and his parents were Vodarac extremist."

Silence...then the Chairman spoke, "Allow him to continue, and he will become a bane: both to Ikari and to Human Instrumentality. . .Will you tolerate this vermin, or see if we make the first move?"

A month later, Shinji woke up extra early the next morning to make an extra bento lunch. After a month of no Coralian attacks, no LFOs, and routine– "boring!" Asuka would rage– synch. tests; of lunch with Toji and Kensuke, arguments with Asuka, and small talks with Rei, Shinji had gathered the courage to execute his plan. "Just wait for them to leave– wait for Hikari to distract Asuka– and get Rei out of the room to eat lunch with you. She'll want to eat lunch with you," the last part Shinji was willing to be true.

Asuka woke up just as Shinji was finishing breakfast, and he was glad to see that she was in a good mood. 'Must have something to do with Dewey,' thought Shinji, as Misato woke up– with a hangover. Together, Shinji and Asuka walked to school. Mostly, the walked in silence, but occasionally Asuka would make the derogatory comment about his cooking, how he dressed, how he walked, what he said, or how he said it.

Rei did come to school that day, and morning classes passed without incident, and by the time lunch came around Shinji had almost forgotten his plan. "Oh man, ya gotta thank da gods for lunch!" Toji said as he walked out to buy his lunch with Kensuke. Quite unnecessarily, as the two had already assumed that Shinji would stay behind to eat his bento, Shinji yelled after them, "Ah– I'll wait here then!"

Seconds later, Asuka made a dazzling display of grabbing Hikari's hand and leading her out of the classroom, saying much too loudly, "C'mon, Hikari. I don't wanna be around when the two (of the three) stooges get back."

'Lucky!' Shinji exclaimed in his head. It had already been a miracle that Asuka hadn't noticed the extra bento in his bag on their way to school, but this was almost too good to be true.

Rei, of course, was completely oblivious to the goings on of the class, and didn't notice Shinji approaching. "Eto...Rei?" She looked up and toward Shinji, and was surprised to see the second bento he was holding up to show her. "This is for you: since I never see you eating lunch, I decided to make an extra one." Shinji held the bento closer, and Rei took it from him.

"Thank you," she said quietly. Rei was about to open it, when she noticed that Shinji hadn't moved from standing near her desk. She looked up at his face: her eyes moved from his eye to his lips.

"W-would you–umm...like to eat together, Rei?"

"Oh," Rei's chest tightened, and she felt warm, "Yes."

"Rright," Shinji looked outside the window to see if the courtyard was empty. It was. 'Lucky!'

Rei followed Shinji out of the classroom and down the back staircase– hoping to avoid Kensuke and Toji, which they managed. Shinji picked a spot behind a large Sakura tree in the corner of the courtyard, just in case his friends looked out of the classroom window to look for him.

"Thank you for the meal," Rei said, before using her chopsticks to dig in. She put the first bite into her mouth tentatively, and chewed. She swallowed and said, to no one in particular, "It's good."

Shinji also began to eat, but mostly he just watched Rei in silence. He was surprised at her pacing. She began slowly enough, but soon she began shifting her food around, eating particular things quickly. Shinji never considered that Rei might be a picky eater.

"Um...Is there something wrong, Rei?" Shinji asked.

"No, I–" Rei swallowed the rest of her food, looking determinately away from Shinji, "just don't eat meat."

"Oh, ah– I'm sorry," Shinji said; and at that moment he forgot all about his plan to ask Rei out. "I'll remember that next time."

"Next time?" Rei said, looking up. Shinji hadn't realized he said that last sentence out loud.

"Well, if it's alright with you. I already make lunch for Asuka and Misato: I would like to make lunch for you too."

"...Ok," Rei said quietly. Shinji noticed she had turned back towards her food. The shade of the tree cast a shadow on her face, and her bands hid her eyes, but Shinji could have swore that Rei was blushing.

Rei had finished eating, but Shinji found that he had hardly touched his food. Now, Rei sat looking out at the courtyard, while Shinji ate in silence. 'Say something,' Shinji still couldn't remember his plan, not that he had the confidence to ask Rei out in any case. His mind drifted back to their last conversation.

"Is something wrong?"

"Huh?" Rei was staring at him.

"It looks as if you're depressed," Rei explained her question– she was beginning to learn how to talk to Shinji. 'He never let's others in...' Rei thought as Shinji looked at her dumbfounded. She also thought that Shinji would make an exception for her: it would certainly make things easier.

"Maybe. I don't know," Shinji put away his food, and looked down contemplatively. "Like you told me, I tried to talk to my dad, but...well, It was no good. I don't think my dad and I will ever talk again."

"Oh–" was all Rei could think to say. The two sat in silence for a while longer, till something inside Rei told her that lunch was almost over. "We should head back to class, now."

There was a look in Shinji's eye: one that Rei had seen in him before: one that made Rei feel...feel...'feel. Shinji makes me feel in a way that the Commander never has.' Rei was startled once again, when Shinji adopted his false smile and said, "Yeah, I'll see you later, then."

'He's sad again.' Rei stood up and began to follow Shinji, closely at the heel. As they walked across the courtyard, Rei was trying to think of something to say. She accepted now that Shinji and his father would never be as close as she hoped, and she couldn't do anything about that. What could she do? 'I can make him forget about everything that hurts him...for a little while.'

"Shinji," Rei blushed at saying his name out loud again. Shinji didn't notice this time.

"Yes, Rei?"

"I would like it if you made me lunch tomorrow. . ." Shinji was about to respond, but he still had that uncanny sense that Rei wasn't done speaking. ". . .Could you come with me after school, so I can wash and return this to you." She held up the bento's case.

"Ah– b–I," Shinji, against every natural impulse, stopped himself from being apologetic, and managed a firm, "Yes!" Then he remembered, "But I have hallway cleaning duty today. I wouldn't want to keep–"

Rei shook her head. "I have class duty today, so it will be all right."

Ryoji Kaji was hardly around for that past month, and Asuka complained to Shinji everyday. Kaji, for his part, was traveling all around The United Vodarac Socialist Republic searching for answers. He knew that Nerv was tracking him, but he thought that he had shaken his tail long enough to check out this last location– which happened to be an abandoned office complex.

'It's the same as all the others,' Kaji thought, as he spun a broken down office chair. 'The Marduk Group: An "advisory body" under the direct authority of the United Federations Human Instrumentality Committee. Its charter says that their purpose is to select the Evangelion pilots.'

Kaji pulled out a long list and crossed out another name, address, and serial number. 'There are 108 firms linked to the Marduk Group. The first 106 turned out to be dummy corporations. And there were no surprises here for the 107th.'

He sat down in the office chair and lit a cigarette. 'I haven't figured out yet just what those 108 strings are really trying to pull. . .But I think I know the man who's pulling them.'

"Off yer ass, Shinji! Clean up dis revoltin' mess!"

"That hurt! Don't hit me like that, Toji!" Shinji shared his hallway duty with Toji, who had decided to punish him for re-entering the classroom with Rei after lunch.

"Sshh," Toji put his arm around Shinji. "It's parta da plan! If you're gonna peep successful, ya gotta play it right!"

"Huh?" Shinji looked at Toji incredulously. "Peep?"

"Caaaamon," Toji nudged, "Peep! As in under da skoyt's! I know you was thinkin' about it." A girl passed by, and Toji covered hi mouth, pointing to her as she walked passed them up the stairs. "Ya got to be subtle-like. Ya know, look like youse workin' hard." Toji got down on his knees with a rag in hand.

"What do you mean?" Shinji said in a shouting whisper. "I'm no like you!"

"Not so loud, stupid. Just watch," Toji began moving the rag along the floor. "Pretend to wipe da floor– like so, then tilt da head..." Toji looked slightly up toward the girl descending the stairs. Shinji saw his face turn to horror, as a yell died in his throat.

"SU-ZA-HA-RA. . .YOU'RE REALLY GONNA GET IT TODAY!"

"ARGH! I Hadda Pick Da Most Hazardous Pantied A-Dem ALL!" Toji took to running, but the girl caught him by the collar.

'Of course,' Shinji thought, 'It had to be the class rep. Hikari.'

"Stop right there!" Hikari said as she tried to pull Toji back.

"HELP!" Toji screamed as he grabbed onto Shinji, like he was the safe place in tag.

"Whoa, don't–AAHH!" Shinji and Toji fell down the stairs– Shinji cushioning Toji's fall on every step.

"Oh my Gosh! Are you two ok? Ikari, you're bleeding!"

Shinji pushed Toji off him and inspected his arm. It had a fairly large cut, and a good amount of skin had been scrapped off. "Oh," Shinji said disinterestedly. He wanted to get his work done and go see Rei. "This is nothing."

"You should really disinfect it. C'mon, I'll take you to the infirmary."

"Um, I'm like...bruised all over, too." Toji said.

"You just want to get out of cleaning! Go on!" In the infirmary, Hikari proceeded to bandage Shinji's arm. Shinji, for his part, wasn't surprised that the class rep. knew basic first aid. "Sorry," she said, as she finished up. "It's half my fault."

"Hey, don't worry about it, okay?"

"Hey, Ikari. Why do you hand out with such a goofball, anyway? Toji, I mean," she added at Toji's puzzled look. "You're going to become stupid by association, y'know?" Shinji thought Hikari must have heard THAT one from Asuka.

"He's not stupid" Shinji said kindly. "He likes attention, sure, but you can count on him...and he's a really nice guy, too."

"I think so, too." Hikari was blushing.

"What?" Shinji asked. Something was dawning in his comprehension, but then–

"Ah-HA!" The door to the infirmary was flung open, and there stood Asuka in glorious triumph. "I knew it! That's why you were so happy when I invited you to the party! You just wanted to see him!"

"Asuka," Hikari said, standing up, "It's not like that, honest!" Shinji could tell how unconvincing a lie this was. 'But what– or who– are they talking about!'

"But I can't believe you would talk to stupid Shinji about it, and not me!" Asuka was in a real heat now. She was chasing Hikari around the room, while the latter moved around the chair Shinji was sitting in, trying to evade her pursuer.

"Ok, ok! I admit it," Hikari shouted, as Asuka jumped over Shinji and laid her hands on Hikari so she couldn't get away. "Just not so loud. He might hear."

"C'mon, then," Asuka grabbed Hikari by the hand and started leading her out of the room. "You come too, stupid Shinji."

Resigning himself, and momentarily forgetting about Rei, Shinji followed Asuka and Hikari up to the school roof.

By the time Shinji caught up, Asuka was already in the middle of lecturing Hikari about something. He managed to catch, "...you should confide in me more often."

"I'm sorry, Asuka," Hikari said, for what must have been the tenth time. "But...it's fine the way it is."

"No," demanded Asuka, "It's not fine." Hikari turned away from both of them, and Asuka took a deep breathe. "Think about the days we're living in. Only a few generation ago half the population was gone. And only a few generations before that, this planet had barely become inhabited by people. Sure, we're all having here and now, but there's no telling what will happen to us tomorrow." Asuka took another breathe, winked, and wagged her finger. "If you want to say how you feel, you'd better make it loud and clear."

Hikari looked apprehensive, but altogether convinced. Suddenly, Asuka rounded on Shinji. "There you are! It took you long enough! Now, you're friends with Toji, so you should know: how can Hikari and that hot-headed goofball get lovey-dovey?"

"Eh!" Shinji looked to Hikari, who had her face in her hands due to extreme embarrassment. Shinji, thinking that a sudden pain was coming on– a pain that would feel a lot like a high kick from Asuka– if he didn't say something, decided to just go along with all this. "Ah...how about packing him a special lunch? He's sick of the school sandwiches.

"..." Asuka looked at him dryly, as if what he had just said was the stupidest thing she had ever hear. 'The pain approached,' though Shinji. "WE'LL USE IT!" Shinji almost jumped out of his skin. "Crude: yes! Corny: yes! But it might work on that idiot."

'That was a close one,' Shinji thought. 'Crap!' Without warning his mind through up a vision of Rei. Seizing Asuka's momentary distraction, as she planned tomorrow's lunch out with Hikari, Shinji ran to the door, down the stairs, and toward the classroom.

"Rei! You're still here," Shinji's voice moved from surprise to disappointed confusion quite suddenly. Rei was at the window, hitting the chalk erasers together.

"Hello," she said plainly. "I'll be done soon, if you could wait."

"Ah, Of course– but," Shinji looked around quickly. "Is the other person taking out the trash or something?"

"No," Rei said, not pausing in her work. "She left a while ago. She said that she had club activities, and since I never had anything to do, or any other obligations, that it would be best if I did it alone."

"That's horrible," Shinji said without moving from his place in the doorway.

"It's always like that," Rei explained, still going about her work. "I'm use to it."

'I know Rei isn't easy to warm up to, but I didn't think our classmates actively disliked her.' Shinji moved tentatively forward, and grabbed the trash can, which was full. "Have you ever tried. . ." Shinji needed to word this as delicately as possible, "...any club activities, or– I mean– with anyone?" Not so smoothly as he would have like it to come out, but at least he avoided any back-handed insinuation that Rei was purposefully being unfriendly.

"No," Rei said, pausing for the first time to look at Shinji. "I didn't think it was important. All I had was Eva," Rei's eyes fluttered, as she forced herself to keep eye contact with Shinji, "until you came."

Shinji did not turn away, at first. "It's...the same for me." Neither of them blushed or broke eye contact. Somehow, either one or both of them had moved closer, so that they were now only two or three steps apart. Shinji noticed this, and took a step back, as well as looking down at Rei's hands.

"Before I came here, I hated everything. I was totally apathetic: I just didn't care. But I put up a quiet front, playing the good little kid. I guess I was just..."

'Why am I telling Rei all this? Talk about something that's not so depressing.' Shinji thought almost simultaneously with all that he had just said. In the momentary pause he had left, he heard Rei say boldly, "– going through the motions of living."

"?" Shinji looked into Rei's deep, red eyes once again. It had been a while since Rei had given him that look. "Yeah," Shinji assented. 'I wish she would smile.'

"Umm..." Shinji tried to supply a distraction, "I'll go take out this trash. Wait here."

Shinji processed the exchange of words, and came to a conclusion of utter elation. He and Rei were becoming closer and closer. With this, he might even build up the courage to ask her out. This time, Shinji's subconscious didn't bother adding 'as friends' after he thought about going on a date with Rei.