We don't say much on the drive to the beach, both of us smiling, Lumen turning up the radio that I've found it so hard to listen to when she wasn't here. She's right, it all feels ok now, back to normal, how things should be. She reaches her hand across and puts it on my thigh, flexing her fingers over the muscle and grinning. I catch my breath and she grins wider.
"This," another flex, another breath from me, "is just right. I can't believe I ever left. What was I thinking? What an idiot. Thank you." I glance sideways, taking my eyes off the traffic for just a moment to take in her smiling face, cheeks flushed and eyes sparkling.
"For what?" I look back at the road, telling myself I don't need to keep watching her, that we have all the time in the world.
"For taking me back, for not hating me," she says simply, sighing and flicking back her hair with one hand.
"I couldn't hate you for going, not if you had to go. I envied you that your darkness had gone." I realise that, in the light of her recent revelations this might not be the best thing to say, she laughs.
"And I envied you that it hadn't. All the way back on the plane I tried to feel for it." I shake my head, I can't believe it. "I know, how did I get so lucky?"
"What? Lucky?" I frown, she laughs again.
"I know, crazy right? I'm feeling lucky because I still want to kill and that means I get to keep you." I chuckle, she's right, it does sound crazy when you put it like that. "What can I say? I'm wrong on the inside." She smirks and I nod.
"We make quite a pair," I say wryly, she grins.
"I know, I hope the kids at kindergarten learn not to mess with Harrison." She is laughing. I frown.
"I'd never hurt a child," I say seriously, looking at her. Her face falls.
"I was joking. I know that, Dexter. Neither would I..." she sighs; I can see she's embarrassed for the bad joke. I put my arm across hers and squeeze her thigh, she smiles again.
"So, how do I deal with Deb? Is she going to ask questions?"
"We just say you came back. That you weren't sure about speaking to me because of how we broke up. The truth." She nods.
"Just miss out the 'killing monsters' part?" I nod and wrinkle my nose.
"It might be an idea to miss that part out." We laugh and then there's a silence again, apart from the DJ on the radio telling us what a beautiful weekend it is. And I have to agree.
We walk down onto the beach. I called Deb and she told us where to look for them so we spot them quite easily.
"Over there." Lumen points and I see Deb with Astor; Quinn playing football with Cody, throwing the ball high and long for him to catch. I'm guessing Harrison is napping in the car seat, there's a towel draped over it to hide him from the sun. As we get nearer I can hear some of Astor and Deb's conversation.
"So, is this ok? Dexter meeting this girl?" Deb asks Astor who looks up from where she's looking in the picnic bag. Astor nods.
"Yeah, I was real angry about mom but... it isn't Dexter's fault and he's a good man really. And that girl..." she looks at Deb.
"Lumen," Deb says, eyebrows raised.
"Yeah, Lumen, what kind of name is that?" They laugh but it's not cruel. "When she went he was, I don't know, different, like he was faking it all for us." They notice our footsteps and look up; both sets of eyes go wide as they see Lumen, her hand in mine as we walk down the beach. They look at each other, Deb raises her eyebrows and Astor giggles.
"Hey Deb, Astor. How was the picnic?" I lift the towel to see Harrison snoring softly to himself. Deb scrambles to her feet. She is grinning like an idiot. She smiles at Lumen who smiles back. It's like some huge female joke I'm not in on.
"Good, we've got some things left if you're hungry?" She gestures to the bags and I shake my head. Then she looks at Lumen. "Hi, we didn't get properly introduced last time. I'm Deb, but I guess you know that." She laughs and shakes her head, puts out her hand. Lumen smiles and shakes it firmly.
"Hi Deb, yes, I know who you are this time. Nice to see you again." Deb looks Lumen right in the eye.
"Yeah, nice to see you again too. Really." They let go of each other's hands and I can see some bond forming between them.
"Astor." Lumen smiles warily but Astor gets up from the sand and smiles and it's a warm expression, she puts out her hand too, so grown up.
"Hi Lumen. Did you guys have a good afternoon?" She looks to me and raises an eyebrow.
"Yes, we did thank you." All three girls laugh. I begin to feel a little out of my depth. A ball whizzes towards us and lands at my feet.
"Come on Dex! We need a middle man!" Cody shouts and Quinn is laughing at the idea that Cody has decided that I should be in the middle. I wave and jog over to them, carrying the ball with me. Quinn greets me with a nod of the head.
"Thanks Cody, saved me from girl talk there." I ruffle his hair and he laughs.
"Yeah, they'll be talking about you. You should hear Astor talking about boys." He pulls a face. I look at Quinn with alarm and he grins back.
We pitch the ball between us for a while but it's never been one of my sports. I'm much better at lone competition, running, jujitsu. Teams just make me nervous, or want to kill someone. So, after a while there's no effort in my throw and Cody notices.
"Dex, can we get an ice cream?" he points to a shack halfway down the beach.
"Sure," I nod. "Quinn?" He shakes his head and lobs the ball back to where the girls are all now sitting, looking at a magazine Astor has produced from her bag. Deb looks up.
"Ice cream?" He asks as we three wander back to the blanket and the bags. Astor squints up at us and then looks at Lumen and Deb, gauging their reactions. Lumen nods.
"Fuck yeah! Oh...god, sorry kids," Deb flushes and the kids laugh. Quinn shakes his head and puts out his hand.
"Wanna walk with me to get them?" he says to Deb, probably thinking this is some chance for them to be alone.
"No, me and Dex'll go, right?" Deb answers, shaking her head. I look at Lumen and she nods still smiling.
"Good, then you can show me those shoes you were talking about buying," she says to Astor who grins and flicks through the magazine.
"More shoes? You already have bag of them back at the apartment." I mock grimace. Astor rolls her eyes and Lumen laughs. Deb grabs my hand.
"So, what's everyone want?" she takes the orders, writing on the back of her hand like we used to when we were kids and Harry would bring us down here. It makes me smile to think of it.
Deb and I set off down the beach, leaving Cody and Quinn teasing the girls about shoes and girl stuff. They all seem happy enough. Deb tugs my hand and I turn to her, eyebrow raised as though I don't know what's coming.
"Come on!" Her voice is exasperated, she shakes her long, straight hair. "So, what's happening? Looks good to me Dexter." I smile, nod and keep silent until she punches me on the arm.
"Seriously, don't make me kick your ass. Spill the beans! What'd you say? What'd she say? Was it romantic?" I rub my face with my hand and sigh, she sighs louder.
"I did what you said. I told her how I felt." She dances a little in front of me, trying to catch my expression. She is grinning broadly.
"You told her how you felt? Jesus, Dexter, that's like... fucking huge!" I smile and nod, I guess it is. "Did she see you in the club? Why did she come back to Miami?"
"Yes, she saw me. And she thought I'd got over her, that I wasn't interested. And I explained about the girl..."
"And?" Deb is too impatient for me to tell the story at my own pace. I shake my head, laugh.
"And she said she understood." I open my eyes wide and Deb does the same. "I know, I can't believe it either!" Deb throws her arms about me suddenly, throwing me off balance. Then she jumps back and straightens the hem of her shirt, pushes up her sunglasses.
"Sorry, it's just... you two..." She shakes her head a little, searching for the words. "You're just, so perfect together. Anyone can see it. It radiates off the pair of you. You're just made for each other." She sounds in awe, maybe a little jealous. I nod. She doesn't know how right she is.
"I loved Rita and all but... there's just... something about you two together. Anyway, that's great. Why did she come back?" She looks at me as we carry on walking. I glance behind us, Lumen is fastening Cody's shoelace. He can do it himself but I think he's enjoying the help. I smile.
"She came back because home didn't feel like home." Deb squeaks and I look at her. She's grinning so hard it looks painful.
"Because home is with you?" Her voice is high pitched and excited. I raise my eyebrows and nod slowly. "Woo!" She makes me high five her, people are staring. I laugh. We walk on, reaching the ice cream shack. Deb stops and turns to face me.
"That's great Dex, I really like her. Do not fuck this up, bro." She nods seriously, pulling down her glasses and looking at me over the top. I look scared and nod and she laughs.
We carry the five ice creams, licking their drips and trying not to drop them into the sand.
"Jesus, this motherfucker's going to be gone by the time we get back," says Deb, licking around the edge of the cone for the third time. The sun is hot and I'm glad I've got my shoes on, although it's hard to walk in the soft sand. I lick around the base of another cone and then up my fingers which are now sticky. I'm wishing for a wipe out of Harrison's changing bag. I don't like the mess.
"What are those scars she has?" Deb asks suddenly and it stops me in my tracks. I look and she is watching my reaction. "There's a nasty one that goes from her neck to her elbow. Where'd she get that? I don't like to ask her but I can ask you, right?" I walk on for a moment saying nothing. How do I answer this? What can I say that sounds plausible?
"Lumen has some issues in her past." My voice sounds flat and I can feel Deb staring. She nods to herself, no doubt remembering her own issues. With my brother Rudy who kidnapped her and strapped her to a table and tried to get me to kill her. It's a wonder she trusts anyone. I suddenly realise how alike she and Lumen are. Both survivors, both strong, doing what they want despite what happened to them. It's almost a shame they're on opposite sides of the law.
"Fuckers," Deb says it venomously, under her breath. We walk back to the others in silence now. I'm wondering what Deb is thinking. I've often wondered about her cryptic comment at Harrison's birthday when she said I 'must be happy now, now it's all over'. What did she mean? Is she fitting Lumen into some theory?
We hand the ice creams over carefully, Cody nearly drops his and there's a mad scramble of hands as we all help him. Deb and I sit down on the blanket and she leans against Quinn's shoulder. Lumen looks over at them and then leans back against me. I finish my cone and put my hand about her waist. Cody rolls his eyes and Astor smiles.
"What are your plans for tonight guys?" Deb asks us and then she scratches the side of her head, looking up at me in a way which suggests my answer might not be appropriate for the presence of minors. Lumen laughs and looks at me.
"I don't know, we'd not thought that far ahead." I answer looking over at Lumen who is still smiling.
"We could have the kids if you two wanted to go for dinner or see a movie?" Deb offers, looking over at Quinn who nods his agreement. "What about it guys? We could get the Wii out?" Cody and Astor cheer and Quinn laughs. I look at Lumen.
"What do you want to do?" She shrugs and puts her hand in mine.
"I don't mind. It'd be nice to spend some more time together though." I nod.
"Ok, that's settled. We'll all drive back to yours and then we can pick up Cody and Astor's sleep over stuff," says Deb, leaning back against Quinn and pushing her glasses up her nose. I see her wink at Astor, who smiles.
"Sleep over? We can swing by and pick them up later?" I say frowning. Lumen squeezes my hand.
"No, it'll be more fun if these guys stay over," says Quinn looking at me seriously like he's trying to convey some secret message. I look at him, confused. I see Deb and Lumen smiling, Astor hiding a grin in her hand. Right. I get it. I nod and smile.
"Yeah, that could be fun." We laugh, Cody looks confused.
Our laughing wakes Harrison, he starts to cry and Lumen lifts the towel so he can see us all.
"Hey little man," she says softly, stroking his forehead. He stops crying and starts to smile. He puts up his hands to her and she pulls him from his seat. "Oof, you're getting to be a big boy." She sits his bottom easily on her arm and holds him so he can see us all.
"Hey pal, have you had a nice day at the beach?" I ask him and Lumen passes him to me. He pats my face with his soft hand.
We spend about half an hour watching some surfers and laughing at the stories Cody makes up for the passers by.
"Those two are school teachers," he says pointing to two big women lounging under a sun shade. "Yeah, they're called Miss Take and Miss Shaped," Deb joins in.
"Yeah and see those two over there?" She points at an elderly couple holding hands as they walk along, the image of social acceptability. "They're a famous killer couple, like Bonnie and Clyde. They've been on the run from the law so long that the cops don't even know what they look like anymore." The kids are laughing hysterically, the image Deb paints is so preposterous.
"They rob their victims and go on sunny vacations with the loot," says Quinn, laughing with them all.
"But they've had to pick smaller victims recently, because of his bad back." Lumen chips in, tears streaming down her face, I start to laugh. Somehow everyone thinks this is funnier because it comes from Lumen.
"And they have to try not to leave their dentures at the scene of the crime." Everyone looks at me and then laughs louder. The couple pass us by, oblivious to their part in our hilarity. I catch Lumen's eye and she grins at me, wipes her wet cheeks. Deb jumps up from the blanket.
"Right, you guys, come on!" She starts to put things into the bags, directing Cody, Astor and Quinn to help her tidy up. Lumen and I fold the blanket while Harrison plays in the sand, letting the hot grains run through his fingers and laughing to himself.
"We'll follow you back to the apartment and pick up the kids' things." Deb pushes me off towards the SUV and she shows Quinn how to buckles Harrison's seat into the back of his car. He doesn't look very happy that his Mercedes is being made into a people carrier. Deb squeezes in the back with Astor and Cody gets in the front. This is ridiculous.
"Deb, we can take someone!" I yell over and she stands up out of the back seat, stretching. She looks at Cody and Astor and nods. Cody runs over to us and gets in the back of the SUV.
I make sure Deb can follow me as I pull out onto the street. Sometimes I forget that she's been to school to learn how to tail people. She'll be laughing at my early signalling and how I slow down when I get through the lights.
Lumen sits beside me and I try not to think about her staying the night, try not to imagine how that will be and, even though I am trying, it's not really working. She chats to Cody about school, what it's like at his grandparents, are they near Disney, does he like his room?
"I want to come home to Miami," he says suddenly, I look at him in the rear view mirror, he smiles. "I do, I want to come back. You haven't got enough room for us though have you?" he frowns. Lumen looks at me.
"Well, we could maybe get a bigger place," I say, glancing to her and see her smiling. "We'd have to talk to Astor though, and your grandparents." I look in the mirror and Cody nods again.
"It's just not home out there, Dexter," he says and looks out of the window. I look at Lumen and she puts her hand on my thigh again. I try harder not to think about tonight.
Thanks so much for all your kind reviews so far. It's lovely to be sharing this 'Season' with you. There's more to come! Thanks to VB for commas, clearing up dialogue and being a great friend. Cx