Staying Home Can Be Quite Exciting
I thought that today was going to be an uneventful day. But, I suppose that when you're a nation, there's really no such thing. So, just as I had rolled out of bed, I heard the doorbell ringing. I ran down the stairs to get it, and, even though I had forgotten to put on my glasses, I surprisingly didn't trip. The person at the door was none other than Hungary, dressed like a business person, complete with the briefcase and cup of coffee. After I let her in, she plopped herself down on my couch, and proceeded to greet me with these words: "Estonia, I thought you would look cuter with your glasses off! My ex-husband always looked handsome when he..."
I was not in the mood to be compared to Austria, so I asked her what exactly she was doing in my house. Pulling out a large, detailed family tree from her briefcase, she exclaimed, "I just learned that we're cousins!" I knew that the cultures of the countries of Estonia and Hungary (as well as Finland) were related, but I didn't think that meant we were related. I took a close look at the chart, and I learned that all the nations in the world are fifth cousins, if they aren't siblings, cousins… you get the idea. And then, I noticed that Taiwan and I are third cousins, once removed. That's quite unsettling, to be in a relationship with someone that close to me! T^T
Anyways, since we are apparently related, this means that I am obligated to help her draw her manga. I was curious as to why she wanted to write a manga, as most mangas written by non-Japanese are looked down upon, from what I heard. Hungary was all like "But it's lots of fuuuuuun, silly! And it's not exactly a manga; it's a web comic that'll just so happen to be drawn in a manga-like style!" Here are some ideas she has for her comic (all names changed to protect identity)
Lili is a young girl, who, in order to attend an exclusive high school, must pretend to be a boy and work in the "host club", which is run by a few handsome, wealthy, Scandinavian men who more or less fit all the cheesy-harem manga stereotypes.
After finding a magic pony, Feliksette must fight crime as the sailor-suited "Pretty Warrior Po-chan".
After finding a magic book—oh, you get the point. They're all basically rip-offs of famous shojo mangas. :/
I told her that I'll think about which one I like best (read: none) and let her know by tomorrow.
After I got that over with, I was about to make myself, as well as Latvia and Sealand, breakfast. They had been watching cartoons the whole time, blissfully unaware of Hungary's presence. Just when I was about to open the fridge, I heard a loud, girlish scream, which sounded like Lithuania's. We all ran up to his room, only to find him standing at the window. "Look!" he yelled, "There are two bums in the yard! And they've dug they're way in! Estonia! What I thought you were the smartest Baltic! How could you be dumb enough to not have good security?" While he was panicking, Latvia was… also panicking, but he had come to a quite different conclusion, to say the least. "Oh my goodness, guys, those must be mole-people. They burrowed their way into our yard! That means it's the apocalypse! WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE! OF ALL DAYS, WHY WAS IT TODAY! ISN'T SUPPOSED TO BE IN 2012?" Sealand, on the other hand, was jumping on Lithuania's bed, oblivious to what was going on, as usual.
I, being the only sane one in the entire house, went down to open the door for the supposedly impoverished mole-people. After taking a good look at them, I concluded that they were certainly not mole-people. I still had no idea who they were, until one of them spoke. " s'tn' w' sc'p'd fr'm pr's'n 'gn!" (Approximate translation: Estonia, we escaped from prison again!") You guessed it; the two people in my front yard were Sweden and Finland, who had somehow managed to dig their way out of jail, and, for some reason, into my yard.
After inviting them in for breakfast, Finland had admitted that he made a bit of a mistake while digging (with his bare hands!), and that they had ended up at my house instead of his house. Sealand was quite embarrassed by his parents' antics over the past few days and decided that he didn't want to live with them anymore. After packing up his luggage, he grabbed an umbrella and floated away back to his artificial island, much to the sadness of Sweden, and the indifference of Finland. They left the house in a pretty bad mood, but I think they were happy to be free men once more.
Thankfully, not much happened after breakfast. That is, until I checked my e-mail. I learned that I, of all people, had gotten my name selected to be the judge at the beauty pageant (why do I have this feeling that Finland wrote all of my personal information on the ticket?). And I learned that it was called "Miss International Sunshiny Beauty of Creamy Margarine", and that it was supposed to take place tomorrow, in the United States.
The morning was once again uneventful. Latvia and I spent most of it reading books, since I don't have an iPad *sigh*, until Lithuania announced that he had some "good news". I'm not sure if it's really good news, but he said he was going to "be a man" (in an argyle sweater-vest, no less) and visit Belarus, then tell her of his true feelings (which she most likely already knows of). Latvia and I know that it's going to end with him being injured. He bet me five euros that Belarus will break Lithuania's fingers again, but I think she's more likely to break his leg. But maybe she'll be grateful to see him for once, after her date with America. Let's hope this ends well.
Just as he went out to woo his "true love", we found Poland, dressed as if he was going to a funeral, veil and all, at the door, showing an uncharacteristic level of concern for Lithuania's well-being.
"OMG guys, where's Liet? I haven't seen him in like, two days. He's dead, isn't he? Why did Liet have to leave the Earth so soon? He was a good man; he didn't deserve to die so young! Anyways, since he's gone, who'll carry my bags when I'm shopping?"
And Latvia, being ever-so tactful, replied before I could:
"[very quick talking that sounded like gibberish]!"
Fortunately, Poland didn't catch a word Latvia said. Unfortunately, Latvia decided to say it again, much more slowly:
"He's been really depressed for two days since Belarus went out with America and now he's gonna finally tell her about his true feelings even though she probably already knows, which of course means that Liet will never love you anyways so stop worrying!"
Poland did not take such news lightly:
"HOW COULD LIET NOT LIKE ME? I'M WAAAAAAAAY PRETTIER THAN BELARUS! AND WE WERE PALS SINCE WE WERE, LIKE, REALLY SMALL! THIS IS TOTALLY RIDICULOUS! DOESN'T HE HAVE ANY REGARD FOR MY FEELINGS, RUNNING AROUND LIKE THIS? WE WERE MARRIED FOR WHO KNOWS HOW LONG AND NOW HE JUST… UGH!" Then, ripping off his black outfit to reveal a Winnie the Pooh t-shirt and pink shorts, he suddenly went back to being normal, cheery Poland, "Well, then, if he wants to be that way, then would one of you mind replacing him for today?"
Being Poland, he didn't actually let us answer, and just dragged poor Latvia out of the house.
So now I was home alone, which was actually pretty nice, so I could, eat lunch, read books, and check on my tumblr, twitter, deviantart, facebook and etc accounts in peace.
Of course, the world being the way it is, I couldn't ever be in peace for long. I heard the phone ring, and, out of politeness, decided to pick it up.
"Hello? Who is this?"
"Iceland."
"I'm not doing your summer school homework, if that's what you want."
"No, no," he laughed, "I just need some advice."
"About what? Computers?" That was the only thing I could imagine anyone asking me on advice on.
"You're really bad at guessing, aren't you? Look, do you know anything about dating?"
"You're asking me, of all people, about that?"
"Well," huffed Iceland, "My brother doesn't know anything, Denmark's only advice was that I should fix my hair, and Sweden and Finland don't seem to be in their right minds right now."
"I see… so what exactly is your problem?" I asked
"I want to ask this girl out to go see a movie, but Norway wouldn't allow me, even though it's the Smurfs movie."
"So you like Belgium?"
"Ha ha, very funny. No, I like the Seychelles."
"Okay…" I answered, "tell Norway that you're going to the library and then—"
"That's all you can think of?" he interrupted, "I'm going to call Russia, then. He seems like a nice guy!"
He hung up, and I was left a bit disturbed by the thought that he would find Russia a nice guy. But just then, I got another phone call.
"Estonia!" the person on the other end exclaimed, "It's me!"
"Me who?"
"I'm Latvia! Oh dear! You can't even recognize me!" He was obviously hyperventilating.
"Why exactly did you call?"
"Umm… well… Poland's been forcing me to watch My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic with him… AND I THINK THAT SHOW IS OVERRATED! I WANT…"
Then there was silence. I was very worried.
"LATVIAAAAAAAAAA!"
"Sorry, Poland was just asking me to give him a 'brohoof'."
"You want me to get you out of there, don't you?"
"Yes…"
I formulated a plan so quickly that one would've thought they were in a sci-fi movie.
"Just do as I say," I said slowly.
"Okay."
"Breathe slowly and deeply."
"Got that…"
"Now get Poland on the phone."
Poland came to the phone, slightly irritated.
"You just interrupted my, like, MLP watching time! My inner brony is totally mad at you!"
"Right… look, I know how upset you are about Liet… and I just wanted to make it up to you…"
"Uh huh."
"I won this draw to be a judge at a beauty contest, but, as much as I wanted to cherish the opportunity, I think you would appreciate it even more than I would."
"OMG THAT'S SO NICE OF YOU! I LOVE YOU, ESTONIA!"
"Is it okay if Latvia comes home now? I'll give you the information when I pick him up."
"YES YES YES!"
So I picked up Latvia, and told Poland things he could've just found out on the internet, except for the fact that he must, at all times, pretend his name was "Eduard von Bock". And then Poland gave me one of those long hugs which make you feel awkward, but not awkward enough to scream "Eww... get off me!"
When we got home, I found South Korea at the door. He asked us if he could play video games with me. That was the most normal request I got all day, so I said sure. We had quite a fun time (except for Latvia, who does not like seeing aliens being blown up). South Korea told me that he was watching Korean dramas with Iceland prior to visiting me, until Iceland asked him for advice on asking out Hong Kong, which caused "one of those moments that normally wouldn't be too awkward, but is made more awkward by what you're doing at the moment". I had no idea that watching Korean dramas made moments awkward. Anyways, I decided not to tell him about when Iceland called me earlier, to spare any drama, but I guess he can still read about it on my blog XD.
South Korea is a nice guy. It's a bit of a shame that Japan finds him annoying, but I guess that's what historical conflicts do to people. :(
Lithuania still isn't home. I'm worried for his life.
Update: Since PirateKing complained about this blog, tomorrow is probably going to be my last post ;_;. It's going to be "Questions and Answers with Estonia". Send me your questions, guys!
- Posted by EpicStonia at 9:54 P.M.
All Comments (23)
Plum-blossom: It doesn't matter that we're distantly related. Belarus loves Russia, Norway loves Iceland… and they're siblings!
*****EpicStonia: Very good point. :D
*****Trollface: I love my brother as a brother. I can sue you for libel.
*****Plum-blossom: And that, my dear Estonia, is how you unmask a fail troll!
*****Trollface: Haters gonna hate.
Amazingkorea: Oooh… Iceland loves two people… it's like a Korean drama! (grabs popcorn)
*****MrPuffin: I was asking you where to find Hong Kong, since I was going to ask him about asking out the Seychelles, silly.
*****Amazingkorea: Seems legit.
*****MrPuffin: Glad that's been sorted out :)
*****EpicStonia: You don't have your brother's knowledge of internet slang, do you?
PirateKing: I'm going to report your blog to the admins. You can't spread rumours like that.
***** Ninjamaid: If you do that, then Esti can write my webcomic with me!
***** EpicStonia: asdfjkkjll (banging head on keyboard) Have you ever seen Prussia's blog?
***** PirateKing: Already closed it :D.
***** EpicStonia: I think "||:D" is a more accurate emoticon XD.
***** PirateKing: Stop making fun of my eyebrows.
Puppies-are-cute: I don't talk like that.
***** SniperofDarkness: Yes you do.
***** EpicStonia: Please elaborate.
***** Puppies-are-cute: I use vowels.
***** EpicStonia: Of all people to have that username... I didn't think it would be you!
***** SniperofDarkness: I didn't either.
***** Puppies-are-cute: You guys are completely missing the point
(A/N: TaiwanxEstoniaxPoland OT3! Just kidding XD. And yes, you guys can send questions to Estonia! I know you probably have a lot to ask, but please no more than three questions per person, thank you. I can't believe this is almost over, but I'm looking forward to writing the last chapter. :) )