Subject: Edward Cullen aka the Womanizer
Chapter Eighteen – The Ugly
I drove Bella back to her apartment the next morning after her release from the hospital. She dreaded our return home because news leaked out again about the incident. Her brother would no doubt call.
Though our interaction has been filled with tension, I tried to convey that I wasn't going anywhere. However, she saw right through the lie. Since she'd awoken in my arms, she had yet to meet my eyes. I was aware that she was upset, more so when we arrived at her apartment.
I'm a fucking prick.
The doctor said that she needed to take a couple of days to fully recuperate and relax. It was already noon by the time we reached her place. I offered to make lunch.
"Just some sandwiches will be fine," she whispered, walking over to her cordless telephone. "I'm going to call Jordan. I'll be in my room."
Once she left, I struggled to even stay upright. I hadn't slept at all as Bella slept in my arms. I tried to burn into my memory the look of her pale face, the tubing, and way she looked at the club desperate to breathe. I needed to concentrate on that; it was the only way to remind myself why I had to leave.
Tanya was one sick bitch to try something on Bella. How could I not see the signs of her twisted mind? When I went back to the club after I had been with her a few nights before, she completely ignored me. At the time, I was thankful that she felt no need to try to talk to me again. In fact I'd been down- right pleased.
Most of the women I left the club with knew exactly who I was, and what I wasn't capable of. Bella proved them, my family, and me wrong. I was capable of loving someone. I was capable of caring for someone.
I had to go back to the person I used to be. Or at the very least pretend to become him again. It was time I took a step back, for her safety and for my own sanity. I wouldn't survive if was taken from me in such a cruel way.
I heard the soft padding of her feet as she walked into the kitchen as I finished putting lunch together. The look in her eyes revealed the call didn't go well.
"I'm fine," Bella whispered, looking into my eye for an all too brief moment.
"Are you?" I argued.
Her head snapped up and anger flashed in her eyes, her lips pursed in a thin line. But the emotion was gone in a flash. Replaced instead by defeat and sadness, and just as quickly she composed herself. "Just leave, Edward."
"No," I answered firmly.
"I can't stand you prolonging the fucking inevitable." Why could she read me so easily?
"I'm not leaving."
Cold, humorless laughter filled the room. "When are you going to understand that I can tell when you're fucking lying?"
"I don't want to leave," I whispered, it was me that avoided her eyes, closing them. I would not be able to hold myself together if her eyes were as cold as her laughter and voice.
"Yet," she countered. "When is it going to be fucking okay for you to leave? Huh? When I feel better? Or when you feel better? Or is after you fuck me one last time?" I felt her in front of me, her fingers moving deftly along the buttons of my shirt. "If this is what it's going to take, then let's get this over with."
I split in two. One side wanted to touch her, feel her and hold her. The other side wanted to run. To run from the fucking pain that I knew would come. I was selfish.
I let her take off my shirt and run her warm hands over my chest. I groaned when her tongue swirled around my exposed nipple. I pushed off the counter, grabbing her shoulders, stilling her movements. She looked at me, her eyes glazed with unshed tears as my lips descended on hers.
She moaned softly as her hands started to play with my hair at the nape of my neck. I licked her bottom lip with the tip of my tongue. Soft parted lips allowed me to enter, stroking her tongue with my own. I pulled her small body toward my own, sensing her jump up. I captured her by her ass, her legs wrapping my waist.
With our lips never leaving each other, I laid her softly on the bed and pulled away to take everything off her body. I wanted to savor each inch her creamy skin. I kissed each of her tiny red painted toes. She giggled when I sucked on her pinky of her right foot. And the sound of her laughter stilled my aching heart.
We could pretend for the rest of the weekend.
My hands wandered up her legs and slowly removed her clothing as I kissed every inch of exposed skin. I continued my ministrations, starting at her ankles. Her body flushed a delicious pink when she realized what I was doing. I kissed every tiny scar and every freckle. She giggled again when I licked the back of her knee. The hem of her tiny white cotton panties earned a little extra attention, earning a soft moan. Desire coursed through me and my clothes joined the rest of her near the bed.
I descended on her body once again. I kissed her belly button and fluttered dozens of kisses across her torso. There were more moans, soft whimpers and giggles. I wanted to commit the sounds to memory.
I would never want to forget a single moment of my time with her. Her laughter was a sound that I hoped, once I was gone, she'd continue to do. I pushed her t-shirt up higher and kissed each of her ribs. I could see the bottom swells of her breasts, and I wanted to fucking see them.
I tugged her top from her body in seconds, eager to see my hands on them. Her eyes met mine for a moment, but she turned away. I wanted to force to meet my eyes, but I knew I couldn't. The pain that would be in her eyes, so easily read, would be my undoing.
With every kiss, I tried to tell her that I loved her. With every lick of my tongue, I tried to tell her I needed her. With every ragged breath, I wanted to convey that my leaving was for the best. I kissed her lips softly, savoring as she seemed to be doing. Despite the tenderness of her kiss, her hands held my arms for dear life. I wanted to cry. I wanted to tell her everything was going to be all right, but we were both pretending.
Her hands ran down my arms and over my back and into my boxers. She grabbed my ass and pulled me closer. I groaned as I felt the slick warmth against my erection. Her hands pushed off my boxers as my lips left her pretty little mouth, lavishing attention on her neck, soon descending on her pert nipples.
"Please," Bella gasped as her back arched off the bed. I groaned and gave in to her plea, sliding inside her, groaning as I filled her.
There was no rush, because neither of us wanted this to end. Bodies' slick with sweat, started to tighten. She came with a silent cry of my name, almost a lament. I continued, thrusting, prolonging her orgasm. She came again which brought me to my own blinding climax, it was almost painful.
After, I slowly pulled out of her and tried to pull her to my chest as I rolled onto my back. She wouldn't let me, instead, turning away from me, shoulders trembling. I cried out and pulled her back to my chest, molding my body against hers. We both silently cried ourselves to sleep.
Sunday morning I awoke to smell of bacon, vanilla and cinnamon. I groggily walked into the kitchen. Bella was at the breakfast table and smiled when I entered. "Sorry, I hope I didn't wake you." Bella smiled a genuine smile.
I ran my hand through my hair and shook my head. I returned her smile and went to sit beside her. She put a plate in front of me and we quietly ate her delicious food and read the paper together. We were still pretending.
We spent the rest of the morning curled up together on her couch watching reruns of Friends. She wanted to laugh. I wanted her to laugh. It was how I wanted to remember her. How I wanted to remember us.
Bella smiled at me and shook her head. "That is something I could see Emmett doing." I laughed and nodded in agreement as Joey entered the apartment wearing all of Chandler's clothes. Bella laughed and threw a piece of popcorn at my face. I laughed and threw a piece at her.
We played like that for a few minutes before she dumped the whole bowl on my head and sprinted to her room, laughing. I shook off the popcorn and ran after her. She wasn't in bed or on the chair. She wasn't there.
"Bella?" I asked. I swore she ran into her room. Then I heard a giggle from the closet. I flung the door open and there inside of her full walk-in closet was my Bella in nothing but my old football jersey. She laughed and tried to run past me. I grabbed her around her tiny waist and wasted no time, throwing her over my shoulder and took her to bed.
We pretended the rest of the day together.
It was just past midnight when I knew I had to leave or I'd risk staying. I was lying on Bella's chest and the temptation to remain was almost too much to bear. I arose carefully, so not to wake her. I kissed her forehead and whispered softly, "I love you, always." I dressed and managed to walk a few steps toward the bedroom door before I heard her stir.
"Where are you going?" Bella whispered. I turned back to look at her and I wished I hadn't. The bed sheet was wrapped around her waist with her legs and beautiful upper body exposed. I longed to walk back and join her, but I couldn't. I wouldn't.
"Umm, I have no more clean clothes here, so I'm going back to my place."
"Oh, okay," Bella said. "Will I see you in the morning?"
"Of course, love," I ran my hand through my hair. "I'll see you at my place so we can go to work together. Like always."
"Okay. I'll see you then," Bella whispered, turning her back to the door.
"See you in a while, love." I turned and started to close the door, hearing a sob escape her before I'd taken three steps from her door.
Internally I groaned and ran from the apartment. I didn't stop until I was in my bed. I fucking hated my bed and myself for what I was about to do. But it had to be done.
For my plan to work, I needed to make a phone call. I pulled out my cell phone out, knowing she'd be awake. I found the number and hit send.
"Hey, it's me."
"Hi handsome," the voice said on the other end.
"Can you come over around six this morning?"
"And interrupt my beauty sleep?"
"Please, I need a favor."
"Hmm…I'll be there."
Bella
Damn him.
He worshipped my body for the past day and a half and pretended everything was going to be all right. He was still leaving. I turned my back from the door and couldn't help the sob that left me. I loved him and he loved me but it wasn't enough.
Maybe it was for the best that he left. I'd make it easier for the both of us. This way, he was leaving me because he loved me not because he hated me. He'd hate me and leave me once he learned the truth.
I would make it easy for him, but if he chose to go back to his old ways to drive me away, he had another thing coming. If he pulled that shit then Isabella Marie Swan was coming out of the woodwork and I'd give him a piece of my mind.
I made it to this apartment just before six thirty that morning. I heard two whispered voices from within his apartment. One was his, the other one a female. Damn him.
I knocked on the door and the whispered voices suddenly stopped. Edward answered the door and he looked, well, like he did after leaving my bed. His shirt was opened, his hair disheveled and the buttons of his slacks were undone. Asshole.
I looked past him and standing beside his counter was a beautiful red head. I smirked internally. So this was his game plan.
Edward
"Bella umm…" I ran my hand through my hair, unsure if I could really do it. "Um, this isn't what it probably looks like."
Bella brushed past me walking toward the kitchen. Okay. I had expected her to yell, to slap me or walk away; not go right up and confront the "other woman" dressed in my shirt and shorts.
Maggie's eyes widened as Bella approached her, extending her hand. What the fuck?
"Hello, I'm Bella Swan. It's nice to finally meet you." She smiled with her hand still extended.
"Uh," Maggie didn't know what to say. She looked at me and I just shrugged my shoulders.
Bella turned enough for me to see a smirk on her face. "Maggie O'Hare, owner and chef of The Grill," she said as Maggie took her hand to shake. "And Edward Masen Senior's half-sister, which makes you Edward's half-aunt."
Shit. She turned to look at me and cocked an eyebrow. She stalked toward me and patted my face twice with her hand. "Do you really think I'd start a job without doing a thorough check on the company and its people? If this is the game you want to play. Fine. Game on."
She pushed me aside. "Maggie," she said over her shoulder. Call me and we can do lunch together with Alice and Rose." Then she walked out, calmly closing my door behind her.
"I like her," Maggie said laughing. "She doesn't take things lying down or your shit, sweetie."
~oOo~
I nervously walked up to Bella's office that led to mine. She sat at her desk, but she looked nothing like my Bella. She was dressed in a black pant suit, her hair was all pulled up in a tight bun and she had on glasses. She looked up at me, what I saw caused me to cringe. Her eyes were flat. There was nothing behind them.
"Bella," I whispered.
"Sir," she said in a curt tone. "Your coffee is already on your desk. Your first appointment will be here in twenty minutes. All files and notes are already up on your computer and desk."
"Bella."
"Yes sir?"
"Call me by my name please."
"No, sir." She looked away from me and back at her computer screen. I sighed and walked into my office, closing the door behind me.
She was trying to make this easier. Then why did it still fucking hurt? Twenty minutes later Bella introduced two new clients and placed a recorder beside me.
"Aren't you staying and taking notes?" I asked before she left.
"No sir, I have a meeting with Carlisle in a few minutes." With that said, she closed the door behind her.
It was a long morning to say the least. A few minutes before lunch, my door opened and Rosalie and Alice stormed in. "What the hell is fucking wrong with you?" Alice said through clenched teeth.
"Nothing," I answered, looking over a file.
"Don't give us that shit," Rosalie said firmly as she took the file from my hand and slammed it closed on my desk.
"It's for the best," I said, refusing to meet either of their gazes.
"She's the best thing that ever happened to you," Alice pleaded with me.
"Exactly Alice," I snapped. "And look what happened to the 'best thing' because of me."
"Damn it, Edward," Rosalie said and stormed out of the office with Alice in tow. I sighed and ran my arm across my desk in my anger and pain. I laid my head down on the cold wood and let a few tears escape me. I can do this. I must do this.
There was a soft knock on the door several minutes later. "Come in."
Bella walked in but only a few steps within my office. "I'm heading to lunch. Do you need anything before I leave?" I shook my head, but as she turned to leave but I asked her to wait.
"What was the meeting with my father about?" I asked curiously; if it had to do with her project, I would've been asked to join them.
"He gave me some information about a new position that I may be perfect for," Bella whispered, then closed the door behind her.
Oh hell no. I stood up abruptly and stalked toward Carlisle's office. I walked right past Margaret and straight inside. His chair was faced the window as I pounded my fist on his desk.
"Don't fucking interfere," I growled. His chair turned and he faced me. He stood up, placing the palms of his hands on his desk and looked straight at me.
"Don't come into my office and disrespect me, Edward." Carlisle said firmly but in a neutral tone.
"Why and the hell are you trying to take Bella away from me?" I stood up, crossing my arms over my chest.
"I've been considering her for the position since she started," Carlisle said calmly. I was able to see him trying his best to remain composed.
"No. I want to be able to at least see her."
"I will not stand here and watch that poor girl leave this company because she can't be around you," he snapped and walked around his desk, surprising me, pushing me into a chair.
I looked up at him. "It won't be like that," I lied.
He laughed humorlessly, his face flushed red. "That girl that was in my office earlier was not Bella. She's a completely different person. What the hell did you do to her?"
"Nothing…everything...fuck." I ran my hands through my hair and averted my eyes from his darkening gaze.
"I have stood by you, even though I have seen how you treated women. I hated it. It was a constant reminder to me and your aunt Esme that we failed in raising you. But this is fucking sick." I cringed. Carlisle didn't cuss, ever.
"You know what that poor girl has gone through and yet, you chose to do this to her. Despite your feelings," he said through clenched teeth. His hands were by the side of his body and clenched in fists.
"I have no other choice, Carlisle. I can't let something like this happen to her again," I pleaded for him to understand.
"Do you know she has nightmares?" I paled and shook my head. I had thought once that she used to but she said in passing, that she didn't anymore.
"She called Esme at three in the morning, crying that her brother was shot. She was confused. She's reliving her brother's accident and her friend's suicide in her dreams."
"She never had nightmares when we'd spend the night together."
"Exactly. Don't you understand? Edward, they stopped because she felt safe with you."
"It doesn't matter, she'll get over it," I said, trying to convince myself and him.
"If your plan is to keep her close for your own selfish need to still see her, you give me no other choice than to offer her the position of Charitable Project Manager."
I cried out. "No! Don't take her away from me. The only office still left is on the other side of the floor. I'd never see her."
"You give me no other choice. Do you think it's easy for her to be around you?" I shook my head. It wasn't easy for either of us. "Fix it or she'll be leaving your office soon." Carlisle sat in his chair and didn't look at me. His mind was made up. I was going to lose her.
I deserve it.
Lunch was spent in my office alone and unable to eat anything. I heard Bella return to the office with James shortly before her lunch was scheduled to end. I opened my door slightly and watched as he led her to her desk. She handed a card to him, but not before writing something on back. She smiled up at him and he looked slightly embarrassed as he took it.
Bella smiled to reassure him and placed her hand on his shoulder. James smiled back. He left shortly afterward. He was already going to move in on her. If anyone could change James it would be her. Well, if she could start to date then surely I could.
I spent the rest of the day keeping myself busy and avoided all contact with Bella. I was still a little angry that she would move on so quickly, but I had tried a similar tactic that morning with Maggie.
"I'm leaving for the night," she said a little after six in the evening. I nodded not looking up.
"Bella?" A voice called from behind her. She turned and walked back out of the office without another word. I walked to my door in the pretense to leave, but in reality, I wanted to follow her out. In her office were her family and Jacob.
Jordan looked straight at me and glared. He wheeled toward me, never taking his eyes off of me. "I knew you were no good for her. I actually hoped you'd prove me wrong."
"I'm not."
"You don't deserve her," he spat.
"Jordan," Bella chastised him.
"No, he's right I don't deserve you," I said, walking out of our offices. "That's the point I've been trying to make." I turned toward the elevator, not bothering to see her response.
"Then fucking let her go," Jordan called out to me. I waited beside the elevator doors and pushed the button repeatedly. I heard and felt someone behind me.
"You know this fucking self-loathing thing is pathetic, Cullen. You and I both know that you and Bella belong together," Jacob stated, grabbing my arm so I could face him.
I snapped my arm from his grasp. "I know why you want Bella and me together. It's not going to work anymore. It's over."
"Damn, I'd believe you if you weren't lying."
I growled, "You don't know shit."
"I know that you're hurting and so is she. But she's going to hide it, from everyone and then…it will happen again."
"What the hell are you talking about?"
"After Brianna died, Bella was catatonic for almost a month. After that, she was fucking zombie. She went about her day, come home and go to bed. Mark my words if it gets like that again, I will be back," he said through gritted teeth and went back to his family.
I walked into the elevator and turned to look at her. She stood beside her brother who pointed at her hair. I saw her take her hair down, a little glimpse of the Bella I loved. It fucking hurt to see like that, which probably explained her sudden demeanor. Yet, it still wasn't making any of it easier.
I avoided the gym, because the chance to see her there was too great. Bella continued her game by dressing and speaking to me the same way she had that first morning the rest of the week. I missed hearing my lips from her lips.
It was finally Friday and I wouldn't have to see her for two days. I wanted to go to the club to play the part of my old ways, but I didn't have the heart to do it. A phone call to Alice indicated the club scene had lost all its appeal since Bella's collapse. Then she reminded me that I was a fucking asshole and hung up on me.
I spent the weekend at home where my mind wandered to the last few weekends I had spent with Bella. The first weekend at the falls, she looked so beautiful with the sun and wind in her hair. The daydream I had of Bella and me on the trail with our daughter and pregnant with our, had become a nightmare. It would never happen, and I cried myself to sleep.
I had no idea the scope of pain I'd endure when I chose to save her by leaving. It was worse that the wretched memories of the day my parents died.
As another week passed, and I watched Bella get thinner and dark circles form under her eyes. She wasn't sleeping and by the look of her, her appetite was gone. All of it was tearing down the wall I had so carefully constructed around me. I killed me to see her in such a way.
It was Friday, and I wanted to see her before she'd leave for the day. However, she had come in with Carlisle and indicated that she had finished early. I allowed her to leave and turned my attention to my uncle. His eyes were on Bella, his concern for her so clear on his face.
"I'm offering her the position officially next week," he said firmly, slamming my door without waiting for my response. Fuck. The news was devastating and after two weeks of curt nods and "sirs" I had had enough.
It was time I paid visit to the elusive Ms. Swan. I hoped that out of the office she'd be more herself and not the person she'd been since I left her apartment two weeks previously. About to knock on her apartment door, pausing when I heard voices from within.
"That's fine darling, I'll wait in the car," a male voice said behind her closed door. Whatever else was said was too garbled up for me to determine who it was. I froze as the door opened and James exited. He saw me, but there was no look of gloating as he brushed past me. I was fucking pissed since I told him to stay away from her.
"James," I growled, ready to kick his fucking ass for laying a hand on her.
"You're choosing to see what you want to see," Bella's voice said from just inside her apartment.
I turned to face her after I was sure that James was gone. "And what I do see is James leaving your apartment at nine in the evening and you're leaving with him."
Bella cocked an eyebrow in challenge. "It's none of your business, Ed…" she trailed off.
I switched to my old tactic, despite how hypocritical it made me. "It is when you're not supposed to date fellow co-workers," I snarled, my chest heaving from my anger.
Bella laughed, once again humorously. "Nice try."
Someone from within the apartment cleared their throat to get our attention. "Thank you for everything, Dr. Swan."
"No problem, Victoria. I'll see you and James next week at the same time." Bella smiled, opening her door further to let a leggy, curly redhead out.
"Of course, I'm looking forward to it already." Victoria smiled once again, walking into the hall. I stood there confused as fuck as Bella turned away from me. She left the door open. I walked in behind her, accepting the open door as an invitation. I closed the door behind me and followed her into the kitchen. Her phone rang and she glared at me as she picked it up.
"Dr. Swan residence," she answered. "Daniel, yes. I'm sorry Big Bubba is sick and won't be able to join us on Monday. No we can't have an appointment by ourselves." I became instantly on alert. There was no way in hell she'd see him without someone present during their session. "We'll make up for it up Tuesday, how's that?" She listened, keeping her eyes on me. "All right, call me if you have any problems. I'll be home. Goodnight."
Bella hung up, her eyes on mine, seemingly waiting for me. "James is seeing you for therapy," I stated more like a question. She answered with a simple nod. "I thought you were dating him."
"If I was, you shouldn't care, right?"
"I do though."
"What do you want? You want to see me but not be with me. It's fucking unfair of you to become angry at the thought of me dating someone else, Ed –" She stopped herself again and shook her head.
I grabbed her by the shoulders. "Please say it. Call me by my name." She looked at me then, with ire and desire in her eyes. God, I fucking missed it, seeing the fire behind the mask. She shook her head again. I threw my hands up in the air in frustration. "Why not?"
"It's unprofessional." She shrugged her shoulders, walking back toward her kitchen.
I growled, "I don't fucking care."
"Why? Do you miss it?" She asked cocking an eyebrow.
I groaned as both of my hands tugged at my hair in my frustration. "Fuck, yes!"
"Good," she said icily.
"This isn't my Bella."
"Your Bella is still in that hospital room. You left her there."
Ouch. She turned from me and walked to her fridge to pull out a bottle of water. I noticed the contents within were sparse. "Bella, please talk to me. I hate this. I didn't want this to happen." I gestured toward her.
She looked down at her loose fitting slacks and blouse. "I lost some weight, big deal."
"It is a big deal. I can't stand watching you do this to yourself."
"What the hell do you care?" she said calmly, the mask back in place.
"Ahhh! I do fucking care. I have always cared!"
"Please leave, Edward." I gasped at the sound of my name; it was the first time in almost two weeks since I heard her say my name. "Edward," Bella said it again, walking toward me, taunting. I took a few steps back. "Edward," she whispered breathlessly.
I groaned, closing my eyes, unable to hold her molten gaze. "What's the matter, Edward? Does it remind you of something when I say your name?"
"Yes," I admitted. My back was already against her front door. She tiptoed, her cheek on mine, and whispered, "Edward."
I groaned again, taking her face in my hands and pressing lips on hers harshly, perfectly. Her answering gasp was not of surprise but of lust and want. She grasped my shoulders as my tongue stroked against hers. Her moan was soft, but her fingers were urgent and hard in my hair.
God, I miss this, us. She pulled away to breath, but angled her neck so that my lips could trail from her mouth along her neck. "I miss you," I whispered, another kiss. "I want you." Kiss. "I'm sorry." Kiss. "I was stupid." Kiss. My hold on her grew impossibly tighter. "Please forgive me." I whispered against the skin of her neck.
Bella moaned softly, "I forgive you." Her hands left my hair and went to my chest to push me away. "But that doesn't change anything."
"What?" I asked, panting from our kiss.
"You hurt me," she said softly. "I'm not ready to go back to us."
"I'll wait."
Bella shook her head. "If I choose to take you back." I had hurt her too much. "I'm a fucking hypocrite for saying this, but I don't know if we can go back to what we had."
"But –"
She cut me off by placing her fingertip on my lips. I kissed it without thought. "I'll stop being Uber-Bella if you just give me time," Bella suggested. I nodded. "Don't pressure me." I nodded again. I'd do anything for her. "Don't look for a quick fix." I closed my eyes, nodding.
"You better go," she said, taking her finger from my lips. I took her small hand in my own and kissed each finger, her palm and knuckles before letting go.
"I lo –" I started, but she shook her head. She wasn't ready to hear those words from me.
"Please, Edward. I don't know what I want right now. I'll see you at the office on Monday."
I nodded and opened the door, brushing my hand over her cheek, "Goodnight, my love."
Bella nodded and closed the door. I leaned against it, trying to listen for her feet move away. They hadn't. I could see the shadow from under the door, she stood by the door then I heard a soft sob from inside as she slid against the door to the floor.
I groaned softly and did the same, resting my cheek and ear against the door. "I love you, Bella."
"I know."
"Please let me back in."
"No."
"I love you."
"I know you do."
"How do you know?"
"I still see it in your eyes," she answered, sniffling gently. "That's what got me through the past two weeks."
"It's been hell," I said softly.
"It has been."
"I'm sorry."
"I know. Please you're already making this harder."
"Go get some sleep, Bella."
"I will when you leave."
"I already left your place," I reminded her.
Her laughter, gentle and sweet filtered under the door. "Leave the building," she clarified.
"I will when you walk away from your door."
I heard her sigh and shift. "Okay, I'm up and walking away."
I got up from my spot and placed both of my hands on the door. "I can see that you're still there."
She huffed loudly, and I wanted to laugh. "Fine," she said. "Good night Edward."
"One more time."
A soft chuckle greeted my ears again. "Edward," she whispered through the door.
"I'll never get tired of hearing my name tumble from your lips."
"That was cheesy." Bella giggled.
"What can I say? You bring out the cheesy-movie romantic out of me, my love."
"You can go now," she sang.
"You're still by your door," I complained.
"I'll alert security."
"No, you wouldn't."
"Wanna try me?" Bella snickered.
Damn her. She would call them. "Fine. Love you, my Bella." There was no answer and the shadow was no longer under the door. I sighed as I walked toward the elevator. I slept a little better that weekend.
Monday morning, Seattle was filled with dark ominous clouds and a down pour. Worry had me calling Bella to see if she'd be all right to drive in the horrid weather. It was also a chance to offer an invitation to drive.
"Bella, love, are you okay to drive in this weather?"
"Good morning to you too, Edward," she said sarcastically on the other end.
"Sorry," I mumbled as I left my apartment.
"I'll be fine Edward," Bella said. "I'm almost to my car now."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes. Don't forget to bring back the Knight file. I have some items I need to renew in it."
"All business aren't you?" I complained.
"Yes," she chuckled. I could hear her disarming her car alarm. "Daniel, what are you doing here?" Then her voice sounded distant. "Daniel, relax Daniel."
"Bella!" I roared into my cell phone. Fuck. The voices were muffled on the other end, so I wasn't aware what was going on. Fear gripped me, reminding of that night at the club. I continued to listen as I rushed to the elevator.
"Ms. Swan." Another voice, one that I recognized but it wasn't Daniel's.
"Stay back Derek and Adam." That was Bella, I said. She was still all right. "Daniel, put the gun down," Bella said calmly. Oh God, no! The doors finally opened and I pressed for the lobby.
"I hurt her, Dr. Swan," Daniel sobbed.
"Who Daniel?"
"My wife."
"I'm sure she'll be fine, Daniel."
"No she won't. I …tried to hurt her."
"I know but we can work through that together, Daniel."
"I'm sorry."
"I know you are, Daniel. Please put the gun down."
"Why are you crying?"
"Guns scare me and you're pointing it at me."
Oh please no! Please hurry you fucking elevator. "I would never hurt you."
"I know you wouldn't, Daniel. Please put it down. The police will be here soon. They may hurt you if they see you pointing it at me."
"I hurt everyone I love."
"No, we'll call your wife together and we'll work through it," Bella responded.
"She doesn't want anything to do with me. She hates me for trying to hurt her."
"It's all right," Bella cried out suddenly. "Please you're scaring me." The doors opened and I ran full speed toward Bella. Just I approached the building, Officer Davis drove up.
"I can hear them," I said to him.
"Is he really armed?"
"Yes, she said that it's pointed at her."
"Daniel, please." Bella pleaded. Then I heard her scream and a shot fired. No! Two armed officers, Davis and I, ran down the stairs that led to the underground parking garage. Derek, the doorman of the building was pale and looked like he was going to be sick. Bella was on the concrete floor covered in blood, crying over Daniel.
"No…" she gasped, pulling in a lungful of air through a sob. "No!" I ran to her, pulling her up, turning her face against my chest so she wouldn't have to see him. "Daniel!" she cried, trembling in my arms.
"Baby, are you hurt?" I asked, trying to check her. I turned from Daniel's body and tried to pull her away. Instead, she pushed me away and laid her head on his chest and sobbed.
"I'm sorry. I failed again." Her whole body heaved from the labored breaths she took. The rest of us watched silently, the only sound echoing through the room were her cries. It was the most heart wrenching sound I had ever heard.
Someone tapped my shoulder, leaning down to tell me something. "Get her upstairs and cleaned up. Keep the top layer of her and your clothing by the door so I can come up in a while and get it," Officer Davis said. I nodded.
When I took a hold of Bella, she didn't push me away. I picked her up and started to walk toward the elevator. She lost consciousness before I pressed the button. I gently shook her awake.
"Edward," she questioned, her red rimmed brown eyes, looking at me. So fucking lost.
"I'm right here, my love," I whispered, kissing her forehead.
She nodded and rested her head on my shoulder. I carried her to her apartment as she quietly cried. Once I reached the bathroom and placed her on the counter, she screamed at the amount of blood that covered her.
"Get it off of me!" Crying and screaming, frantically tearing at her blouse.
"Shh…I will. Please just stay still." I tried consoling her. Without unbuttoning her blouse I pulled it over her head, her skirt just as easily. When the screams stopped, an eerie silence fell upon her. Her eyes were so distant, lost somewhere I'd never be able to follow. Her gaze fell to her lap, staring at her blood soaked hands and screamed again.
I pulled her into my arms, humming her lullaby, hoping to provide any kind of comfort she'd need. Gently I laid her clothes on the floor and I quickly discarded my own.
"Why do these things always happen to me?" Bella asked her eyes wide and childlike.
"I don't know, love."
"I failed."
"He was too far gone."
"I still failed," she said more firmly.
"You did what you could."
"Edward, get me in the shower," she gasped, wrapping her arms and legs around me. "I can't stand it. I'm going to lose it. I'm barely hanging on by a thread."
"I will." I walked us both into the shower and turned on the sprays.
"Every time I close my eyes, all I see is blood," Bella said as she watched the blood, diluting as it ran off her hands under the water.
"You won't," I assured her. "Not always."
"It'll be the same old nightmare only worse, another death on my hands."
I shook my head and took her face in my hands. "I'll help you through this." It was almost a plea, a plea for her to let me help her. Her eyes softened and she nodded. With her cheek softly pressed against my chest, she sobbed.