Chapter 29: Running in Circles

A/N: Thank you to everyone for your continued support. In my chapters, I hope to fix or make clearer specific points that some reviewers had brought up, so I hope this chapter clears some things up. Please keep reviewing and letting me know what you guys want to see in this story. Hope everyone is having a good day :)

Hunter and I decided to stop by some place called McDonald's before heading back to jail. Dorms. Same thing. I didn't actually realize it until we had gone by the drive thru that I was starving.

"I can't believe you've never had McDonald's." He said while stuffing his face with a handful of fries and sitting on his bed.

"I mean, I've heard of it. But fast food isn't my thing." I said reaching inside my bag to pick up what he thought was the best burger ever. "If I die from this, I'm suing you."

Hunter laughed. "How is it that the great Sebastian Smythe has never had something so simple as McDonald's?"

"The 'great' you just put before my name is precisely why I don't eat this. I prefer something more...sophisticated."

"Oh please." He said rolling his eyes and taking a bite from his Mac Attack. Or…Big something? Whatever.

A loud knock came from the door. Who the hell is here at midnight? "You!" Hunter said, referring to me opening the door. I chuckled before taking another bite from the burger. If he thought I was getting up from my comfortable spot, he was mistaken. The burger wasn't horrible. But it wasn't…real.

Hunter let out a loud sigh before heading to the door. "Blaine?" I instantly felt my stomach turn. What the hell was he doing here? "How did you get in?" Hunter asked.

"You aren't my only friend here Hunter." He said before walking inside. He looked confused when he saw me sitting there with fries and diabetes in a bun.

"Sebastian." Blaine said, standing directly in front of my bed. I wouldn't look up at him, so I just nodded my head in recognition. "We need to talk."

"I guess this is the part where I leave." Hunter stated, rather than asking. He got his food and offered a fry to Blaine who put up his hand to say no. Hunter shrugged and walked out of the room. This is going to be bad.

"I wasn't going to come here. Not after the little stunt you pulled tonight." He said sitting down on Hunter's bed.

"Then why did you?" I asked still not looking up at him.

"What the hell was your problem tonight? Yeah, you saw me kiss a guy and I'm sorry if it hurt you but you have no reason to be mad at me. You know, you can say some really hurtful things when you're pissed Sebastian."

"Yup. So I've heard." I said taking another bite from my burger. I wasn't really that hungry anymore, not since Blaine walked in, but if my mouth was occupied, I wouldn't have to speak to him.

"We won." He said throwing me a certificate of participation and the first place ribbon. Wait, so they actually had awards?

"You came all the way here at midnight just to give me some stupid award?" I said placing it on my pillow.

"God! You drive me insane, you know that?" Blaine stood up from the bed and was pacing the floor. "I don't understand how we got like this. How did the Sebastian I was dating turn out to be such a little fucking brat?" Blaine was furious, staring directly at me. He never really swore out loud so that took me by surprise.

"Get out." I said standing up and opening the door.

"No. Not until we come to some sort of conclusion." He said crossing his arm.

"What the hell do you want from me?" I was getting aggravated. I never thought Blaine would make his way all the way to Dalton just to pick a fight.

"Why do you hate me so much? I can't do this anymore Sebastian. Being with you is like a roller coaster!" He said throwing his hands in the air and standing up.

"Then leave Blaine. You have no reason to be here anymore." Each word was a lie, but I wasn't one to lose a fight.

"Who are you kidding Sebastian? I know what you're thinking, despite everything you've been saying." Blaine sat back down and placed his head in his hands.

"You don't have to be with me anymore. So why are you here?"

"But I want to." He said in barely a whisper. "Which is ridiculous! Why do I choose to be with someone who literally makes me insane? I can't get enough of you Sebastian, and it fucking sucks. You're like a drug, you know that? A drug that I'm way too addicted to. And I know where this is going to end. This won't stop until it completely destroys me. And do you want to know the worst part? That no matter what you say to me, not matter what you do to me, I don't hate you. I can't hate you. I love you." He was yelling by this point and getting closer to me with every word until I could feel his warmth. He looked frustrated, but more than anything, Blaine looked defeated. What was I supposed to say? We were in too deep for our own good. We were stuck. Stuck with each other. I closed the door and sat down on my bed, directly across from Blaine. I reached out my hand so that I could hold his.

"I'm sorry. I just. Something came over me when I saw you with that guy. You have no idea how bad I wanted to walk up to him and tear him a new one. It hurt Blaine."

Blaine let go of my hand and stood up to stand by the window, crossing his arms and resting against the frame. "That was Eli. Remember how I cheated on Kurt? Well, that was the guy it was with." Blaine paused for a while before speaking again. "He came up out of nowhere and just…made me feel like maybe I had found what I was missing. I don't know if that makes sense, but when I was at my lowest, he was there. He was there when Kurt and I were having trouble. And he was there when I needed someone's touch. Someone's love." Blaine paused. "You weren't." He said turning around and walking over to sit on Hunter's bed. "How do you think it made me feel when you told me that you had sex with Hunter? I didn't care about it when you two would hook up before we were together. And I know I shouldn't care now that we've broken up, but what am I supposed to feel? You can't just call me and tell me about some guy you just hooked up with and expect me to be okay with it. Especially not Hunter."

"I asked you when we started this friendship if friends talked about things like that and you said yes." I defended.

"We aren't friends!" He said standing up and pacing the floor. "You know that. We were never friends. We've always been more than that." He said rubbing his temple.

"So why shouldn't I be upset with the kiss you shared with that fucking asshole? If we've always been more than friends, than you should understand why I got so pissed."

"Exactly my point Sebastian! Damn it, we're talking in circles. Sebastian, listen." He said sitting down next to me. "I get it. You were upset seeing me with someone else. But how would you feel if every time you told me you screwed Hunter I would completely hate on you and make you feel like crap?"

"Bu-" I started.

"No, let me finish. Eli means nothing to me. He was a mistake. But you're friends with Hunter. For god's sakes, you guys live in the same fucking room. He isn't just anybody; he's someone that you actually care about. Plus, the most I've done is kiss another guy. You've had sex with who knows how many guys since we split." Actually, I really didn't know. "You know the feeling you felt seeing me kiss Eli? The feeling of a hole being punched into your chest and someone ripping out your heart?" Weird. Isn't that exactly what I felt? "I feel that every time you mention another guy. But because it's sex with someone else, not just kissing or hanging out, it's 100 times more painful."

It was obvious how hard Blaine was trying to fight back his tears. I guess it did make sense. How could I sleep with people and expect Blaine to be okay with it when seeing him so much as touch someone else sent me on a warpath? Why was I so stupid?

"Here's the thing Blaine. I've never once thought about it like you just explained. We have always viewed intimacy differently. The reason I got so upset when I saw you was because I know what a kiss means to you. I know what a touch of the hands means to you. I know what sex means to you. You wouldn't kiss someone if you didn't actually have feelings for them. Which is why when I saw you and Eli, I knew that it was over for us. I knew I had lost you completely. I can just fuck someone and act as if nothing, but you can't. You always have feeling and love behind a kiss or when you have sex. You could never just have sex with someone and move on. That's why I thought it wasn't as big of a deal if I did stuff like that, because you knew it didn't mean anything to me."

Blaine sighed. "Somehow, I feel like that makes sense, in a weird, twisted way. But you need to realize something; just because you having sex with some guy doesn't matter to you doesn't mean that you having sex with some guy doesn't matter to me." He said grabbing my hand.

"So what does this mean? We're friends, who don't have sex, but aren't allowed to have sex with other people?" I asked raising an eyebrow. "Well, we're seriously some messed up people. It's a lose-lose for me." I said rolling my eyes.

"I don't even know. I mean, you can have sex just don't tell me." He said his eyes directly looking into mine.

"But how can I have sex knowing that it hurts you this much?" I said with a sigh. "So is that what it means to talk things out?" I said taking a drink from my coke. "Want some?"

He laughed taking the coke from me. "One second we're at war. The next we're best friends." He said shaking his head. "I've never pegged you as the McDonald's kind of guy." He said grabbing some fries.

"I'm not. Hunter wanted some. Looks like I'm no longer a fast-food virgin."

"Wait, seriously? That's the first time you've eaten fast food?"

"Yup. So what exactly did we win besides a certificate and a ribbon?" I said lying down.

"We won each other. Again. Sort of." He said smiling and getting up. "Well, I should leave." He said fixing his shirt.

"No! Stay. You can crash here tonight, it's already late." I wanted him to stay. I needed him to stay.

"It's Sunday night, remember? I have classes in the morning."

"Fuuuuuuuuuuu-" I said before placing a pillow on my head. I had completely forgotten that tomorrow was Monday. "When are we hanging out?" I asked, sitting up again realizing that Blaine was leaving me.

"Not sure. You're still my date this Friday night, that is unless you forgot." He said raising an eyebrow.

"I know! The dance. But I better see you before then." I said smiling.

"We'll see." He said with that same bright smile on his face.

"You better get out of here. The only thing that's keeping me from pulling you down here and making you mine is the fact that you have a long drive ahead of you." I said standing up and pulling him into a hug. "Friends can say I love you, right?" I asked pulling away.

"I guess, but they don't usually mean it like we do."

"Well, I love you friend."

"Fuck you." Blaine said laughing as he made his way towards the door.

"I don't like swears coming out of your mouth. It turns me on too much." I said wrapping my arms around his waist and pulling him into me, his back to my chest. Blaine let out a quiet moan when I started massaging his length with my hand. "I do have an idea of something else that can be in your mouth though." I said whispering in his ear, my lips grazing his ear as I spoke.

"You're such a tease. You suck, you know that?" He said pushing away from me, a tent forming in his pants, his cheeks turning a slight shade of red.

"What can I say? It's what I do best." I said shrugging. I knew he didn't mean suck as in blow job, but it was fun construing all his words to make him feel dirty.

"Bye Sebastian." He said shaking his head and opening the door.

"Say it." I said pinning him up against the open door.

"Say what? The L word?" He said with faux confusion all over his face.

"Don't play with me Blaine." I said kissing his neck, nibbling and sucking a trail down his collarbone. I started sucking harder on one spot so that it was clear he was mine. A hickey was a good marker right?

"Sebastian!" He said pushing me away and grabbing his neck. "Now everyone's going to talk about this for days." Blaine said groaning.

"Good." I said laughing and throwing myself on my bed. "See Blaine, that's how you throw yourself on someone's bed without ending in a concussion."

"I hate you." He said before closing the door.

"I love you too!" I yelled loud enough so that even the kids down the hall could hear me.

Where did you even go? –Sebastian

I'm in Nick and Jeff's. Come play video games. –Hunter

At 1 in the morning? We have class tomorrow. Besides, I don't play video games.–Sebastian

Since when do you care about showing up to class? Please tell me you've played at least once in your life? –Hunter

Nope. Can't say I have. –Sebastian

Nick and Jeff suddenly came barging into the room.

"What the hell?" I said not getting up from my position. Nick and Jeff practically picked me up and dragged me out of my room to make our way back to theirs. I wasn't tired anyways, and besides, I wanted to stay up and make sure that Blaine got home safe.

An hour after playing some war game and I was hooked. "Dude this is actually fun!" I said, causing everyone to laugh.

"Has Sebastian ever said dude?" Thad asked.

"Has Sebastian ever said fun?" Jeff added. Everyone started laughing again, but I was too busy kicking ass to care. When the round was over, I stood up and turned to look at them all.

"If you tell anyone about this you're all dead." I glared at them all as I walked out of the room.

You home yet? –Sebastian

Just got into bed. –Blaine

Okay good. Just making sure. Now I can finally go to bed! –Sebastian

Aw, you waited for me to get home to go to bed? You're such a good friend. –Blaine

Yeah, yeah. I hope this text reaches you with as much sarcasm as I intended it to have. –Sebastian

Good night Sebastian. I l-l-lo-lov-love you. Sound familiar? –Blaine

Shut up. –Sebastian

"Together, we've made a total of 1,500 dollars!" Mr. Schue said writing the number on the board. "It's still not quite enough, but for now we should focus on coming up with song ideas for the Sadie Hawkins Dance this Friday."

My mind wasn't with my body today. I've had this bad feeling all day. I was being stupid. Snap out of it Blaine! Finn and Santana were arguing about something when I focused back in on the conversation. It sounded more like a one sided battle of wits to be honest. Santana knew how to dish it out, that's for sure.

"What're we even arguing about?" I said leaning over to Sam.

"I was hoping you could tell me." Sam said turning his head to look at me. "Woah, what is that?" Sam said rather loudly, enough so that people looked over at me. As if to make me more embarrassed, Sam was pointing at my neck. "Someone's been keeping busy." He said nudging me with his elbow. Sebastian! I knew this would happen.

"I...burnt myself with a straightener." Wait, what? Did that really just come out of my mouth? Everyone laughed, clearly aware of my hickey and the fact that I was a horrible liar.

"You can't even think of a decent lie." He said chuckling and turning his attention back to the front.

"Anyways, who agrees with Finn?" Santana said. No one raised their hand, either afraid of what she would do if they went against her, or because they had no idea what was going on, which was my case.

"C'mon guys!" Finn said. Everyone looked away, not wanting to feel badly about voting against Finn.

"It's settled." Santana said bringing her hands to her hips and smiling. "The theme for the dance is A Night in Vegas."

"What does that even mean?" Artie asked looking away, realizing he probably shouldn't have said anything.

"What do you mean what does that mean? A Night in Vegas. Pretty self explanatory Artie." Santana said. The rest of the meeting went by pretty quickly. We were all assigned to different group numbers or solos that we would sing the night of the dance.

When the school day was over, I wanted to stop and buy a coffee before heading back home to start my homework.

Hey little brother. Where are you? -Cooper

Lima Bean. Why? -Blaine

I'm home! Mocha Latte, thanks. -Cooper

I rolled my eyes, not really caring that he wasn't there to see my eye roll. When did Cooper decide to come home? Mom and dad had been gone for a week on business, but neither mentioned Cooper coming back to Ohio.

"What can I get you?" I looked up from my phone to realize that I was up next to order. The male barista was actually really cute. I couldn't help but blush slightly when I realized he was chuckling at the fact that I was staring at him.

"H-Hi, can I have a medium drip and a mocha latte." I said looking in my wallet for cash.

"Sure." He said smiling at me. I knew that they were supposed to be friendly, but something told me I wasn't just making up his attraction to me in my head. After I paid, he handed me my drinks as well as a flyer.

"I'm not sure if you sing, but just so you know the Lima Bean is adding a small stage in the right corner for people who want to come in and perform. You don't get paid but it's a good place to just perform. Maybe, if you're good enough you can get a job here or something."

"That's awesome!" That was the first time I'd ever heard of the Lima Bean's project. This was perfect! I would definitely come here to perform; it's great practice and it'll actually be really fun. Not like I needed a new reason to come to the Lima Bean anyways.

"Come back soon!" He said waving. "Make sure to check both sides of the flyer for more detail." I smiled as I made my way out. When I got into the car, I turned the flyer around to see that written in blue pen was his number. I knew it! It wasn't just in my head, he was actually interested. His name was John; I smiled, happy that somebody who had no idea who I was would give me their number. Think about Sebastian. I stopped halfway through entering his information. I couldn't do that to Sebastian. I know he wouldn't appreciate me talking to a guy.. But we weren't dating. Besides, there's not harm in just texting someone, right? It wouldn't be another Chandler and Kurt scenario because I wouldn't be flirting with some other guy, I would just be making more friends!

When I got to my house, it didn't seem like anyone was home. "Cooper?" I yelled, hoping that maybe he would hear me.

"Up stairs!" I heard Coop yell back. I quickly stopped in my room to throw my things on my bed before I went to meet Cooper, who was lying on his bed completely sprawled out.

"Hey Coop! I didn't know you would be in town." I said handing him his coffee. Cooper smiled as he sat up and patted the spot next to him on the bed.

"I just needed a break for the glamorous life, you know?" He said as I sat down next to him.

"No, I can't say I do know." I said as Cooper placed his arm over my shoulder. "Is everything okay, you look kind of sick."

"No I'm fine, it was just a long trip home. The flight wore me out." He said before suddenly looking confused. "Where's Sebastian?"

"I told you we broke up didn't I?"

"Yeah, but then you said we were friends, which I assumed was just the sex with no labels kind of thing?"

"We're...weird. Last night we established that we were friends, who don't have sex, but can't have sex with anyone else." I said shaking my head. It sounded even weirder than it had the night before. Cooper looked at me with eyes that read 'bull shit'.

"That doesn't even make sense. So technically, you two are in a relationship, with no sex." He said, looking at me as if I was crazy.

"Well, no, we don't see each other as often as we did when we dated. And we're allowed to be with other people, but neither of us want to hurt each other by doing that." I said shrugging my shoulders, hoping that my explanation made sense even though it didn't even really make sense to me.

"You two are worse than girls." He said rolling his eye, which got him a punch to the arm. "Is there anyone else whose caught your eye? Don't get me wrong, I really like Sebastian with you seeing as you two always bring out the best in each other, but if you've moved on then I would be supportive."

"Shut up Cooper." I said before getting off the bed. "And no. Some guy gave me his number, but I don't want to do that to Sebastian. I don't know what to do to be honest." I let out a loud sigh. "I'll be in my room." I said turning around.

"Wait! Let's catch up, we haven't been together in so long. What do you say you plug in a movie and we can just relax." Cooper never asked to hangout with me. I couldn't shake the feeling that he seemed a little off. "What, a brother can't ask to spend time with his brother?" He said, probably because he realized I had a confused look.

"I have homework Coop." I said, half truthfully, but half wanting to go and text John.

"Bring it here. I'll help you." I sighed, but decided that I would spend time with my brother while he was actually here. It was strange that he wanted to hang out, but it wasn't unwelcome.

"Fine. I'll be right back, choose a movie."I said before leaving his room to get my stuff. I got back into the room and sat down on the bed with Cooper before taking out a notebook and my textbook. I looked up when the movie was starting up, happy to see that it was Les Miserable playing. I've seen the movie so many times that I practically knew it by heart.

When I had finally given up on some stupid math problems I threw myself back to rest on the stack of pillows. I looked over to Cooper, only to realize that he seemed really distant. He looked kind of upset.

"Coop, what's wrong?" I said sitting back up.

"Nothing. Sorry, I just zoned out." He said focusing back in on the movie. I knew better than that. Cooper was hiding something.

"I'm not stupid Coop. Why do you look so down?" Cooper half smiled before sitting up.

"You were always good at reading people." He said with a sad smile on his face. "Blaine. The reason I came home was because I need to talk to you." He said, not looking up from the spot he was looking at.

"What is it?" I could feel my heart rate pick up. Cooper never acted like this. What was wrong? Was it mom and dad? No. That's impossible. Don't tell me something happened to them.

"I went to the doctors to get a physical for a new movie I was working on." He said turning his head to look at me. "Blaine. I uh. Don't over react okay?"

"Cooper." I said. I could feel my stomach turn and I suddenly felt nauseas.

"I have cancer." Cooper laughed nervously as he scratched his head, a single tear rolling down his face.

Cooper. Cooper Anderson. My brother...has cancer.