CHAPTER 9:

Jane's POV:

Young Jane came out to join us at about this time. As there were no other chairs, Tom elected to go back into the house and brought another one out. Once we were all seated, Tom asked of his daughter.

"What do you think about having a walk in the park this afternoon, Jane?"

"That would be wonderful father, I should like that very much! Oh and father..."

"Yes, my love?"

"Perhaps we might have pic-nic there? Like we do at home sometimes when we take our tea out of doors in the garden?"

Tom looked at Jane. "Hmmm..." He appeared to be in thought as if contemplating this, but I noticed that "twinkle" in his eyes and the upward tug at the corner of his lips. Watching the two of them together since meeting them yesterday, I could see just how much he loved his daughter. Again, I couldn't help but feel just a bit jealous of the fact that Jane was not Tom's and my daughter, but Tom's and Mary's even though I was honestly sorry for her demise.

"I think we might be able to manage that!" Tom finally agreed, although I knew he was all for the idea, the second that Jane had brought it up.

"Oh thank you father!"

So thanks to young Jane, it appeared that we had some plans for the afternoon. It did indeed sound pleasant, the idea walking in the park and then having our tea in the form of a pic-nic there. A thought suddenly occurred to me how much Jane and myself seemed to be alike. How very odd, I thought...but in a good way. I did like to think that we were alike, Tom's daughter Jane and myself. I smiled at this thought. If she couldn't be my daughter, perhaps it was just as good that we were alike in personality.

After some more casual conversation, we eventually arose from our places and went back inside to do as we pleased while Tom said he would notify his staff of our plans to have tea in the park that afternoon.

I wandered about the house a little bit and came across a small library which doubled as Tom's office, I was pretty sure as there was a work desk in the room as well. I couldn't help myself, I went in to have a look at what kinds of books Mr. Lefroy (both uncle and nephew) had lining the shelves, as I was curious. I expected that for the most part, they would be law books, but perhaps there were others as well.

I placed my hand upon their bindings and gently ran my finger tips along the titles as I read them, losing myself in what I was doing. As I expected, a lot of the books were about law but not all of them. I started coming across some titles that were works of fiction as well. These ones interested me. I took a book out of it's place here and there to thumb through it to see if I could see what it was about, to see if it might interest me to read it some day. I have no idea how long I had been doing this when Tom's voice startled me out of my activity.

"Have you found anything of interest, Miss Austen?"

I fairly jumped out of my skin at Tom's voice. "Mr. Lefroy!" I exclaimed, startled, turning to face him. Suddenly, I felt ashamed. I had not asked him permission to be in this room. I lowered my eyes from his gaze, blushing once again, then cautiously I looked up at him again. He was leaning against the door jamb with half a smile on his face.

"Oh...I...am...I do..." I started off stammering a bit. "Please forgive my intrusion Mr. Lefroy, I do apologize. I had noticed the books in this room and I just couldn't help myself. I had to come in and see what titles you have. I apologize for not asking for your permission first." I bowed slightly.

Tom now came towards me still smiling. "No need to ask permission, Miss Austen." He said softly. "You are always welcome in my library at any time."

"But it is your office...your work room." I protested.

"And I am not working in it at the present. Even if I was working, I want you to know that you are still welcome to come and look."

I didn't know what to say to his kindness.

"Have you found anything that interests you?" He now asked of me.

"There are a couple of books that have caught my interest, yes." I admitted.

"Then you must take them with you and read them while you are here. And in fact, as we will be getting together for Christmas, you are welcome to keep them if you have not finished with them by the time you leave for home. You can return them to me upon your visit to Ireland."

"Oh Tom, I couldn't..." I objected, forgetting once again to be formal in my surprise.

"Of course you must." He countered me firmly. "I insist."

As I couldn't think of any objections to his offer, I accepted. "This is really very generous of you Tom. I do thank you." I said sincerely.

"You are most welcome of course." He replied.

There was a moment of silence when Tom spoke up again. "Jane...?"

"Yes?"

"I have read your book 'Pride and Prejudice'."

Now I gaped at him open mouthed in amazement. Never in the world had I ever even dreamed that Tom Lefroy might read a book such as 'Pride and Prejudice'. "You have?" I asked rather weakly.

"Yes. And I will say that I thought it was very well written. I thoroughly enjoyed it."

Gathering my wits somewhat, I returned with maybe just a bit of sauce, "It's no Tom Jones..." recalling the time that he had caught me in his aunt's library (after I had spotted him reading a book in the same library) going over her books. He had picked out a book by Tom Jones for me to read as he felt that my "horizons needed to be widened." Upon reading it, I would have to say that the author's book did indeed "widen my horizons" somewhat.

Tom actually chuckled at these words before replying, "No...and I would hope not as you are not Tom Jones."

I received the compliment with a silent bow of acknowledgment.

"I found one character in particular quite interesting..."

I found myself holding my breath...I had the feeling...

"Your Mr. Darcy..."

I knew it...

"He's an interesting character. He seems rather...shall I say, familiar to me." There was that twinkle in his eyes again, I noticed. "Jane...I don't want to sound arrogant, but...I have been wondering since I read it. Is Mr. Darcy..." Tom stopped here as he seemed to be searching for the right words. "Did you..." Another pause. "Is Mr. Darcy...supposed to be...me, by any chance?"

There it was. I had got the idea for "Pride and Prejudice" when I was here last and had started writing it even, only I had called it 'First Impressions' at the time. And as I continued to write the story afterwards, I confess that I didn't realize it at the time I was writing it, but I did notice afterwards when I had re-read it that the way I introduced Mr. Darcy in my book did indeed resemble my first impression of Tom Lefroy. I couldn't deny it then, that Tom had been a bit of an influence on my Mr. Darcy. But I could not change my character, in fact I didn't want to change him...I never, ever dreamed that Tom Lefroy would ever read it, thereby picking up on that fact. Of course I also never, ever dreamed that I would be in Tom Lefroy's library 17 years after we had parted, actually discussing my book with him. But I wasn't about to let him know that. Once again, my foolish pride kicked in and I replied. "If there is any resemblance between yourself and Mr. Darcy, Mr Lefroy it is strictly coincidental." I said with full confidence, holding my head high.

"I see..." He replied with a rather amused expression on his face. I wondered about that... "Well if you have picked out a book or two, perhaps you are ready to leave the library. You are welcome to take the books upstairs to your room if you wish and then if you are ready, we shall leave for our walk and pic-nic in the park."

I was quite relieved when Tom suggested that we leave the library and get ready to leave for our afternoon outing. I gladly accepted his arm as he escorted me to the bottom of the stairs where I rushed up to put my book selection on the table in my room for later reading and then to freshen myself up.

Tom's POV:

I was thoroughly enjoying our visit in my garden when my daughter came out to join us. As there was only four chairs I had go into the house bring out another. I sat my her between Jane and myself and then asked her what she thought about taking a walk in the park with us in the afternoon. As I knew she would be, she quite enthused about the idea. Then she came up with another idea, that I also liked. To have our afternoon tea in the park, like we have done on occasion back in Ireland. It was something that Mary had started with the children when they were younger. On as many of the nice days during summer that we would have, Mary would insist on having our tea outside with the children. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to join them in all of those nice days as I would be at work for some of them, but I did partake in as many as I could. It had become a bit of a family tradition for us and I enjoyed them as much as the rest of my family. After our tea we would encourage the children to play games and I would join in with them. As there always seemed to be at least one child that was too young to join in our fun and games, Mary was happy enough to sit on the blanket taking care of the infant while watching the rest of us, me being just as much of a child as my own children. I enjoyed being able to act as carefree as a youngster during that time with them and my children also seemed to love it when I was "one of them".

I was in complete agreement with the idea of a pic-nic and in fact, I already knew the ideal spot in which we should have it as I have taken many walks in that park myself whenever I am in London and am in need of taking a break from my work. I found that taking a nice slow walk helps me to relax. It helps to clear my head of my work or I would even take a walk just to think...

With Jane there, I was feeling very happy and even rather giddy so I couldn't help myself when I teased my young Jane a bit by trying to pretend that I had to seriously think this idea over while before telling her that we should be able to manage it.

Over the years since Jane's birth, I had come to realize (especially lately) that she was suitably named as she reminded me of another Jane. Something, when I had insisted upon the name for her, I never thought was possible. But my logical side tells me that the reason for that is because Jane Austen and myself are also so similar in some ways that my daughter likely inherited that part from me. However, that other part of me (some might refer to it as the "romantic side") likes to believe that she is very much like the elder Jane in personality more than myself...

After we had exhausted our conversation out in the garden, I decided that I had better inform my staff and particularly the cook of our plans to have our tea in the park so that a suitable basket of food could be made up for it. We all of us entered the house and I told the others to do as they pleased while I talked to my staff.

I was a little while in consulting with the cook about food (whom I sure thought I was a bit off about the pic-nic idea as I had never done this before) before I went on to search out Berkley (who also gave me a bit of a look but being the good, loyal servant he is, asked no questions and went straight to the task when I assigned him) to find a basket or hamper of some sort for the food as well as a couple of blankets for us to sit upon and eat in the park.

Once this was accomplished, there was nothing more for me to do so I decided to go to my office when I stopped suddenly at the doorway, seeing that Jane was in there browsing through my bookshelf. It reminded me of another time when I came across her in my aunt's library...

Not really wishing to disturb her or the moment, I just stood leaning in the doorway and allowed her to continue to look. I couldn't help but smile as I watched her. She was so attentive at what she was doing...what she was looking for...but I couldn't stand there and stare at her forever either. After several minutes, I felt like I was invading her privacy and I knew I either had to leave quietly or say something.

"Have you found anything of interest, Miss Austen?" I found myself saying instead of leaving her in peace.

Obviously, I had startled her when I didn't mean to. I felt a bit guilty for it when she turned to me and was blushing and then started to stammer in her surprise. But then she found her voice and apologized for not asking for my permission to be in that room. I assured that she did not need to ask me for permission, that she was welcome in my library at any time. Even if I was working. I was touched that she seemed a bit overwhelmed by this so I quickly asked if she had found anything of interest to which she replied in the positive.

"There are a couple of books that have caught my interest, yes." she admitted.

"Then you must take them with you and read them while you are here. And in fact, as we will be getting together for Christmas, you are welcome to keep them if you have not finished with them by the time you leave for home. You can return them to me upon your visit to Ireland."

"Oh Tom, I couldn't..." she protested, catching me by surprise this time by using my first name.

"Of course you must." I countered firmly. "I insist."

Jane seemed to be trying to think of ways in which she should object to my offer, but then she finally accepted. "This is really very generous of you Tom. I do thank you." Was her response. I knew it was heartfelt.

"You are most welcome of course." I replied just as genuine.

Here we both fell silent for several seconds. Being in the library, it had made me think of her own book 'Pride and Prejudice' and something I had found rather fascinating when I had read it...and I had wondered about it ever since. Now that I had her alone, I had to ask...I HAD to know...

"Jane...?" I now ventured to ask.

"Yes?"

"I have read your book 'Pride and Prejudice'."

Jane stared at me open mouthed in astonishment. "You have?" she asked rather feebly.

"Yes. And I will say that I thought it was very well written. I thoroughly enjoyed it." I told her in all my honesty.

"It's no Tom Jones..." She returned more firmly having gotten her wits back, with a statement that took me off my guard this time.

I couldn't help but chuckle at the memory.."No...and I would hope not as you are not Tom Jones." I told her kindly.

As Jane remained silent, but gave me a bow in acknowledgement, I decided to jump right into what I had been wanting to know since I read the book..

"I found one character in particular quite interesting...Your Mr. Darcy...He's an interesting character. He seems rather...shall I say, familiar to me." Once I started, I found that it was suddenly hard to go on and ask her as I realized that I might sound rather egotistical. But I had started, so I had to continue...besides...I really still wanted to know. I had wanted to know for too long now.

"Jane...I don't want to sound arrogant, but...I have been wondering since I read it. Is Mr. Darcy..." I stopped as I tried to think of the best way to say this. "Did you..." I paused again searching for the right words. "Is Mr. Darcy...supposed to be...me, by any chance?"

I watched Jane closely as she worked out in her mind what I had just asked of her...she seemed to be either thinking really hard or perhaps fighting within herself as to how she should answer me. Finally came her reply which, I must say, wasn't all that surprising as knowing her the way I do, I kind of had the feeling that she might answer in the way she did.

"If there is any resemblance between yourself and Mr. Darcy, Mr. Lefroy it is strictly coincidental." She said with just a bit too much self-assuredness which lead me to believe that I was right. Mr. Darcy WAS me... But as I didn't wish to push her (once again) I dropped the subject.

Ah...back to being formal again, I noted quite amused. "I see...Well if you have picked out a book or two, perhaps you are ready to leave the library. You are welcome to take the books upstairs to your room if you wish and then if you are ready, we shall leave for our walk and pic-nic in the park." I continued and then offered her my arm again which she took rather quickly as we quitted the library together. I left her at the bottom of the stairs and watched her ascend them rather quickly to her room. I couldn't help but smile up at her disappearing form.