*Thank-you for all the reviews on the last chapter. They were greatly appreciated thank-you all so much. = )
The next day was Thanksgiving and even though tensions were high between my mom and me I still helped her out with Thanksgiving dinner or did my best to help. I'm not that great in the kitchen but I still did what I could. We were hardly speaking in the kitchen and that hurt me a lot because my mom and I had always had a great relationship but it felt like it was all falling apart. While we were working in the kitchen Dave, my dad and Max were in the living room watching the Thanksgiving Day Parade. I was working on the yams when there was a knock on the door. "Tessa, can you get that please?"
"Sure," I said wiping my hands off and walking to the door. To my surprise John was standing there when I opened it. "John?"
"Hey, Tessa," he said. "Kate, my mom ran out of brown sugar. Do you have some that we can borrow?"
"Absolutely, John, Honey," she said with a smile. She wiped her hands off on a towel and took the brown sugar I was working with and handed it to him. "Tell her she can just keep it. We don't need it anymore."
"Thank-you, Kate," he said with a smile. "Happy Thanksgiving."
"Happy Thanksgiving to you too, Honey," she said as she gave him a hug. She had shown him more affection in 5 minutes than she had shown me in the day that I had been there not to mention she gave away the brown sugar I needed. She shut the door behind John after he left and then walked back over to finish working on the green bean casserole. "Such a nice guy.."
"Mom, I needed that brown sugar for the yams," I said.
"Oh. I'm sorry. I guess we're not having yams then," she said.
"But yams are my favorite."
"Sorry," she said, "but you know if you hadn't broken up with John you'd be able to have yams. Sorry about your luck."
"He broke up with me," I said.
"Because you cheated on him, Tessa. Did you expect him to sit around?"
"No but I didn't expect my mom to be a bitch to me either," I said, "you're on your own. I'm done," I said taking off my apron.
"Tessa, that language is inappropriate!"
"Whatever," I said storming out of the kitchen to the living room.
I plopped down on the couch next to Dave and he said, "what happened? I thought you were helping your mom."
"I gave up," I said, "she is intolerable."
"What happened?" asked my dad.
"Well, I was working on the yams and John showed up. Carol needed brown sugar so mom gave him ALL the brown sugar. I told her I needed it and she told me that we weren't having yams. Then when I told her they were my favorite she told me she was sorry but if I didn't break up with John I would be having yams."
"Tessa, you know your mom is just having a tough time dealing with everything. Just give her some time to get over it," said my dad.
"Dad, just because she's taking it tough doesn't mean she needs to treat me like some harlot and John like some saint. John wasn't innocent in this either. I'm just tired of being the bad person and I'm tired of Dave being the bad person. Everyone sees us as a couple of criminals and they see John as some saint. I'm tired of it. At this point you might as well strap an A on my chest because that's exactly how I'm being treated."
"Tessa, just relax. There is no need to be so dramatic about it. How did you think your mom was going to react? You know she loves John and she loved you two together. You should have known she wasn't going to take it well. Just calm down and give her time to accept this. I think Dave is a good guy and I'm sure one day your mom will see him as a good guy too."
"I hope," I said. "So did Santa Claus come on yet?"
"Tess, Max doesn't believe in Santa Claus," said Dave.
"And why not?" I asked. I was really surprised that Max didn't believe in Santa Claus. That was the first time I heard of a little kid not believing in Santa Claus before the age of 6, which is the age I was when I finally realized the truth. It was probably one of the most devastating days of my life. A boy in my class came in telling all of us that he had seen his parents laying the presents out on Christmas Eve and that there was no such thing as Santa. I didn't believe him so when I got home I asked my mom and of course she didn't spare my feelings at all and told me the truth. She told me that there was no Santa Claus and it was geographically impossible for a man to fly around the world in one night even with time zones. I couldn't imagine being four years old and not believing in Santa Claus. I expected my child to believe in Santa so I was hoping Dave felt the same way.
"His mom didn't want him to believe in any of that stuff. He doesn't believe in Santa Claus, The Easter Bunny or the Tooth Fairy. She didn't want to feed him full of lies. I was against it from the start but she won the argument. If I had my way he would believe."
"I see," I said, "I can't imagine a child that young not believing. If you can't have Santa Claus then what can you have?"
"I don't know," he said wrapping his arm around my shoulders, "but our baby is going to believe."
"I know it is," I said with a smile. "I wouldn't have it any other way."
"I didn't think you would," he said with a smile before he kissed my forehead and we continued watching the parade together.
Later that afternoon about a half hour before dinner my grandmother arrived. I had warned Dave about her values and how she could possibly have a bad opinion of us but not to worry about it. She doesn't know when she's being offensive or maybe she just didn't care. She came into the living room and my dad and Dave both stood up when she entered the room. I told him that my grandmother found it appropriate for males to stand up out of respect when a woman entered the room. I stood up and walked over to her. "Hey, Grandma, it's good to see you."
"Good to see you too, Tessa," she said hugging me. She looked me over when we broke the hug and said, "you're pregnant?"
"Yes, Grandma, I am," I said. "I'm 5 ½ months just about 6 months."
"To that goofy kid next door?" she asked. My grandma was never a fan of John. For some reason she disliked him. I have no idea why and neither did my parents but she didn't like him.
"No, Grandma by my boyfriend Dave," I said motioning for Dave to come over.
Dave walked over and said, "Hello, Mrs. Bennett, I'm Dave. It's nice to meet you."
She looked him over and said, "do you think those tattoos make you handsome? Because if you do I think they are disgusting."
"Grandma," I said, "there's nothing wrong with tattoos."
"That's the problem with this world today," she said walking over to sit down on the couch, "everyone has the there's nothing wrong with that attitude. It's why the world is the way it is today. A bunch of harlots and criminals. Those tattoos make him look like a criminal," she said sitting down next to Max. "And who is this kid?"
"Grandma, that is Dave's son Max."
"Oh," she said looking at Max. "I see."
"Would you like anything to drink, Grandma?"
"No, Dear," she said pulling out her yarn so she could work on her knitting till it was time to eat.
"Tessa, can you help set the table or are you going to back out of that too like the brat you're being lately?" Asked my mom.
I rolled my eyes and said, "I'll help set the table." I reluctantly but respectfully went to set the table for dinner. I didn't want to but I did it anyway. I just didn't understand why my mom was being so cold to me. I understood it took time for her to get over what happened but she was being ridiculous. I just wanted my relationship back with my mom but I was starting to see that may never happen.
When dinner was ready we filed into the dining room and took our seats for dinner. Before we started our dinner we went around the table to tell everyone what we were thankful for. My grandma went first and said, "I'm thankful to be living through another Thanksgiving with my family."
My dad went next and said, "I'm thankful that I'm going to be a grandfather and my daughter is probably the happiest she's ever been in 16 years." I gave him a smile and he smiled back while my mom coughed. I knew it was a deliberate fake cough but I paid it no mind.
My mom took her turn and there was no surprise when she said, "I'm thankful that John's family is still talking to me after the ordeal my daughter put him through."
"Kate, that's not necessary," said my dad, "this is supposed to be a happy family dinner. It doesn't matter what Tessa did and it doesn't matter what happened between her and John. What matters is she's having a baby and she's happy."
"Charles, you asked what I was thankful for. I gave my answer."
"Okay," I said. I didn't want to see my parents fight and I surely didn't want them fighting because of me so I decided to take my turn next. "I am thankful for Dave and Max and I'm thankful for my happiness. I'm also thankful for this baby I am pregnant with."
Dave smiled and took his turn next. "I'm thankful for Tessa. I am so glad she came into my life and I'm thankful that we get to share this bundle of joy together."
"Very nice," said my dad. "Max, do you want to tell us what you're thankful for?"
"My baby brother," said Max with a smile. The kid was held bent on having a baby brother. He was not giving up hope on having one. Dave and I couldn't figure out why he insisted I was having a boy but we were allowing him to think that. I felt bad because he would be devastated when the baby came and he got a baby sister instead of a baby brother.
After we were all done with what we were thankful for my father said a prayer and then cut the turkey. We then helped ourselves to food and being pregnant Thanksgiving had become my new favorite holiday so I could eat. I piled my plate with as much food as I could but I was really missing those yams. "Hungry much?" asked Dave with a smile as he looked at my plate.
"I am eating for two but since it is your baby let's say I'm eating for three because we both know this baby isn't going to be tiny."
"I don't know," said Dave, "Max was only 6 lbs 10 oz at birth so you never know."
"Wow. I never would have guessed," I said.
"Tessa, are you and Dave married, Honey?" asked my grandma.
"No, Grandma we're not married," I answered. "We're just boyfriend and girlfriend."
"And you're pregnant? Tessa, premarital sex is wrong. This is your punishment for doing wrong."
"If you only knew, Mom," said my mom.
"Knew what, Kate?" asked my grandma.
"Nothing, Grandma. She's not talking about anything," I said giving my mom a look. The last thing I wanted her to do was tell my business to my grandma. She was 87 years old and this could be her last Thanksgiving. I didn't want her last Thanksgiving to be one of disappointment.
"Kate, what is going on? And where is that goofy kid from next door. I thought he was Tessa's boyfriend? And where did this Dave guy come from and when did she get pregnant?" I could tell my grandma was getting upset. I felt bad for being the reason but it was what it was.
"Tessa was with the guy next door but they broke up and she became Dave's girlfriend. She was already pregnant before she broke up with the guy next door and got into a relationship with Dave," she answered.
"MOM!" I said.
"Kate," said my dad, "that's enough."
"No. My mother wants to know about her granddaughter so I am going to tell her."
"Mrs. Montgomery," said Dave, "please don't do this. Tessa doesn't need the stress please respect that."
"And you think you have a say on what I tell my mother?" Asked my mom.
"No but I don't think this is the time nor the place for you to bring this up. I think it's Tessa's place to tell her not yours," said Dave.
"I agree, Kate, this isn't the time or the place."
"And it's not for you to tell either, Mom."
"Tessa, are you embarrassed by your actions?" she asked me.
"No. I'm not embarrassed by anything. What is there to be embarrassed about?"
"What is going on?" asked my grandma again. "Kate, what happened I want to know."
"Grandma, not right now," I said. "It's not the time."
"I want to know, Tessa and since you're not telling me I want your mom to tell me."
"Tessa, it's good you're not embarrassed by any of this but I am embarrassed. I'm embarrassed that my daughter could be such a slut and sleep with some guy she was working with and behind her boyfriend's back. Then you go and get pregnant. You didn't know who the father was that was great, Tessa then it comes back that it's this guy's baby but you're not embarrassed at all by this?"
"No, Mom I'm not. I'm more embarrassed by the fact my own mother is treating me like dirt. What I did may not have been the best thing in the world but we all make mistakes. We all do things we're not proud of but that doesn't make me any less of a person. Sure, I'm not perfect like you want me to be and John and me didn't have the perfect relationship you thought we did but that does NOT give you the right to embarrass me and treat me like some harlot. What I did was wrong I'm not going to deny that but there is an innocent baby inside of me right now that has a mom that loves it and a dad that loves it and that's all that matters. I don't want to bring it into the world while you're treating me like this. You're treating John like he's some saint but he's not. You have no idea what I went through with him and what he put me through. You will never understand it but you keep on taking his side. You're supposed to be my mom. I have no friends anymore because of this, I lost my job because of this and I feel like I'm losing my mom because of this and that hurts me more than anything. I thought losing John as my best friend was the worst but then I got here and you have been treating me like a red headed step child and that's not right. You don't have to agree with what I did, hell, you don't even have to like it but it would be nice if I had your support. If you took your head out of John's ass long enough you might see that Dave is a good guy and he is the better guy and you would see that I am genuinely happy. Shouldn't my happiness matter more than anything? It doesn't matter how this baby was made. What matters is that it's going to be loved by Dave and me."
"What is going on here?" My Grandma asked. "I know Tessa is pregnant but what happened to the goofy kid next door?"
"I cheated on him, Grandma. I was working with Dave and one night I ended up sleeping with Dave. Dave and me started up a little fling and during the fling I got pregnant while John and I were trying for a baby. John found out about it, we broke up, had a paternity test done and Dave is the father. Now Dave and me are together."
"Oh my god," said my grandma putting her hands over her face. "I never expected my granddaughter to be such a disgrace. You have shamed this family. How dare you sleep around like that. I talk about the harlots in this world and my own granddaughter turns out to be one. I don't understand it, Tessa, you were always such a good little girl. You always followed the rules and now you shamed our family like this. I will have NOTHING to do with that baby and I will have NOTHING to do with you. I am ashamed of you. My only grandchild," she said shaking her head. "I am sick to my stomach over this."
I felt the tears forming in my eyes and I was telling myself not to cry but when you hear your grandmother pretty much banned you from her life it hurts. That was one more person to cross off my list. Everyone was dropping like flies. I expected my grandma to be upset but to not want to be part of my life anymore or my baby's life hurt more than anything. I wanted her to meet her great grandchild and I wanted my baby to know its great-grandma but I had screwed up. It wasn't fair to my baby because it was innocent in all of this. It was my fault and I had already fucked up its life and it wasn't even born yet. Dave wrapped his arm around my shoulders to comfort me but I removed it. I stood up and said, "you guys are supposed to be my family and you're treating me like this. You act like I'm a bad person but I'm not. I am a good person. Good people can do bad things too. Grandma, I understand you're mad at me and you're ashamed of me but don't punish my baby. It does have the right to know you. And mom, if this is how you're going to act and continue to treat me then you won't be around my baby period. I am not bringing her into a hostile environment. You have made this one of the worst Thanksgivings of my life. You're my mom and I love you. You're supposed to be there for me and you're supposed to comfort me. You're supposed to support me no matter what but you can't do that. I'm sorry if I embarrassed you. I'm sorry if I disappointed you and I'm sorry if I shamed this family but don't I deserve to be happy? Don't I deserve to live the life I want to live? I can't do this anymore so first thing in the morning I'm heading back to Tampa. I'm obviously not wanted here. And Mom, you don't have to worry about anything going on in my life and if you want to know anything… you can ask your buddy John. I'm sure he will fill you in like he has thus far but I'm done. I can't let you keep hurting me and telling me how bad of a person I am for doing what was best for me and my child. I am not a bad person.. I'm not," I said as I hurried out of the dining room. I headed upstairs to the guest room before I broke down. I was hurting and I felt really bad. Hearing my family say those things to me hurt me in ways I can't even describe. My mom was my best friend but after that I wasn't sure what she was. I didn't want to lose my relationship with my mom but I was pretty sure that day my relationship with her crumbled into millions of pieces. I laid on the bed crying and rubbing my stomach.
As I rubbed my stomach I talked to the baby which surprisingly decided to become very active during dinner. "Don't worry, Baby, I will never give up on you. I will be the best mom I can be. I'm sorry if I messed up your life already but don't worry you have me and you have your dad. We both love you so much and we're always going to do what's best for you. I love you so much," I said before falling asleep.
*So what did you think? Please review and thank-you for taking the time to read. = )