Twists And Turns

Chapter 22

I loathed to leave my mate alone, but I had unfinished business to attend to that next day. Namely ChiChi's disappearance, and with her, the disappearance of contact with my youngest son. I suspected she was keeping Goten away from me on purpose, and I hadn't really noticed until now that the dust had cleared from all the madness earlier.

I took Vegeta to Capsule Corp and told him to lay low for a bit, and not to get himself into trouble. Trouble followed him like a lost puppy in all honesty - the same was true of me, that was a consequence of living the life we did - but he deserved a rest after all the stress of late, and maybe a day alone would give him that respite. I did worry about him, even as I left for ChiChi's apartment across West City, bringing rehearsals of what I could say to her to the forefront of my mind.

It was easy enough to find which apartment was hers, by her familiar ki-signature; on the second floor with a simple balcony. Rather than use the door and have to ask questions, I flew up to the balcony and, after hesitating a moment, knocked on the sliding glass door once or twice. A few moments passed before ChiChi answered, drawing back the blinds and blinking a little in surprise at me. For a second or two, she looked conflicted, as if she was considering just ignoring my presence; maybe pretending she'd only opened the blinds to let in the sunlight. I almost snorted; what sunlight? It was a dreary grey day today, thick clouds obscuring the sky; she couldn't pretend to enjoy this kind of weather.

She slid the door open though, either figuring I wouldn't do her any harm, or that she couldn't keep me from coming in if I chose to.

"What are you doing here?" she demanded once I'd crossed onto the polished hardwood floor of what appeared to be her dining room.

"Hello to you, too." I said bluntly, not particularly wanting to stir up trouble if there was no need, "I just wanted to talk, we left off on a pretty controversial note last time, right?"

She didn't respond to this, biting her lower lip contemplatively.

I took the moment of silence to look around; ChiChi's apartment was pretty much just what I'd expect from her. Spotless, tidy, serviceable. ….What others might call boring.

Eventually she spoke, "...You look different."

I fought the temptation to roll my eyes, "I am different. But, ChiChi, that's besides the point."

"Then what is the point?" she asked.

"...You've been keeping Goten from seeing me, haven't you?"

She blinked, as if she hadn't expected that answer; or hadn't guessed that I would notice. "Not… not really, I just… it seemed like you were busy from what he said…"

She's lying… the monster murmured interestedly, Wonder what she's hiding…?

"And I really didn't want to bother you -"

I interrupted, "Cut the bullshit, ChiChi, that won't work on me anymore." I winced once the words were out of my mouth, cursing the monster silently.

Her mouth dropped open in shock, and it seemed briefly as if she would start screaming at me for swearing - she'd never been able to handle language like that, and stamped it out of her sons whenever they started to pick it up from school or society in general - but she recovered her poise after a moment. "...Alright, fine. I didn't want him to see you right now, after what you told me about…"

"You think Vegeta would be a bad influence on him," it wasn't a question.

"No."

"What, then?" I looked at her sideways, comprehension slowly dawning.

"Well, you…." she stammered, as if having a hard time putting it into words, "You're…"

She's accusing you, the monster purred cunningly, Human labels… she thinks you're a gay pervert who would corrupt her innocent son.

"What are you trying to say?" I asked, playing dumb; crossing my arms over my chest.

"Well you…" she said again, "You like… other men."

"One other." I snapped, "And not because of his gender. I love Vegeta because he accepts me, and doesn't try to make me change. I loved you, too…. for a time…. but you weren't what I needed. And you were the one who pushed me away, not the other way around."

"You cheated on me." she shot back coldly.

I fell silent. She had a point there… and I wasn't entirely sure how to respond at first as it sunk in. I'd spent a lot of time subconsciously blaming ChiChi for the mess I'd been in, for leaving, for turning on me… but had she really? It seemed a lot more like I'd turned on her, now that she'd put that notion in my head.

"I did," I conceded, not backing down from her, "And I regretted that… at the time. I was unfaithful to you, and it was wrong to do. ...But it did open my eyes quite a bit to what I had… and what I could have."

"So you were selfish," ChiChi sneered, "Betrayed me for a worthless piece of trash like Vegeta, and instead of confessing that and apologizing like you should have you kept it from me! And then you kicked me out of my own house!"

I winced at her shrieking, but held my ground. The monster reeled a moment before attacking me; ranting about how she'd called my mate worthless and how exactly I should disembowel her for that. I shoved the thoughts that were not my own aside and grit my teeth.

"You slept with him," she pressed, as if trying to get guilt from me, prying for a reaction.

I glanced up at her briefly, "Yes."

She braced her hands on her hips and scowled, her eyes blazing, "Was it worth it? One night with that bastard instead of being with your wife?"

"...One night?" I blinked perplexedly, "Vegeta is my mate," I was a little unsure if she understood what exactly the arrangement was right now… "That's a more solid bond than even you and I had."

"I didn't think you of all people would be sucked in by him-" she began, but she broke off, her eyes going very wide. And she stared at me for several seconds. "...You're… still sleeping with him?"

That's all she got from that? I was almost insulted.

I felt a snarl pulling at my upper lip, and I attempted to restrain it, "Yes." I growled, "I have every right to make love with my mate, and I don't have to justify anything I do to you."

"I'm your wife!" she shouted, looking appalled.

I almost laughed.

"Ex-wife." Was all I said. Deadpan, looked her in the eye.

She said nothing for a long moment.

"...I'm filing for full custody of Goten." she said smoothly. Almost haughtily.

Immediately, the monster snapped awake again, "No, you are not!" I snapped, my hands clenching into painful fists, "I'm his father, I have a right to see him."

"You keep talking about rights," she spat, "Like you're so entitled after what you've done."

"You can't keep my son from me." I growled. Not only did I mean in a sense of the law; she literally couldn't keep the child who was a thousand times stronger than her from doing what he really wanted to…. I only hoped he would want to be around me. I hadn't exactly been good company to anyone lately.

"I can, and I'd keep Gohan from you too if he still lived under my roof."

I snorted, "Your little two-bedroom roof that you're renting on Bulma's loans?"

ChiChi's face turned very red; it would have been almost cute - nearly a blush - if not for the ugly expression she wore on it.

"Now you listen to me, Goku." she hissed furiously, "You've been nothing but a problem for those children since they were born. Never there, never providing, only teaching them to want to fight pointlessly like the rest of you stupid, meat-headed Saiyans -"

"Like it or not, ChiChi, they are Saiyan." I snarled, rage writhing under my skin, "I don't force them to do anything, if anything it's you who's been forcing them. Breathing down their necks to keep studying, pressuring them to be perfect little angels who can never see the world because you keep them cooped up indoors all day. You pressed Gohan's nose to the grindstone so hard it was rubbed raw by the time he escaped."

Her mouth opened and closed a few times, like a goldfish, as she glared at me, "I had to. And he became such a good boy because of it. Look how great he's turned out despite your influence."

"...I think he would have been destroyed without my influence. Turned into a mindless robot that only knows how to do equations, and not how to live." I retorted, "He's already damaged as it is; confused and self-conscious, all because of what you imprinted on him as a child."

"He was a straight A student from kindergarten through high school thanks to me!"

I shook my head slowly, banishing the ire from my veins, at least temporarily. "Only letters on a piece of paper."

She pursed her lips sarcastically, "Right. I suppose to you savage Saiyans, written words don't matter too much. But here on Earth, we call that being civilized."

"So I'm a savage now, am I?" I growled.

"Always have been, in my opinion."

I fought the urge to reach out and throttle her, as it would only prove her point. "Then why did you marry me?" I snapped, my fingernails digging into my palms.

She visibly faltered, but the cool, indifferent expression returned quickly, "Because you're strong, and you promised when we were kids that I would. ...I thought you would be a good father to raise our children. If I had known you were a battle-junky alien and a joke of a parent, I wouldn't have been so keen on it."

It was like she'd slapped me in the face. I just looked at her for a long moment, feeling the monster's rage bubbling up in my chest.

There was nothing I could say in response; no words filthy enough I could drop on her. I could feel my power climbing with my anger, and I forced it to stay at least remotely under my control, so I wouldn't go full-on Super Saiyan right there in her dining room.

"I'm leaving now." I grit out.

She sniffed, "I'd just as soon throw you out the door."

X

I closed the door to Capsule Corp quietly behind me. Too quietly. I almost wanted to wrench the door off it's hinges and turn it to splinters just for that. I was shaking almost imperceptibly with the anger that hadn't left, as I located Vegeta on the sofa and sat down heavily next to him. Exhaustion washed over me, and a low sigh left my lips as I tilted my head back wearily.

"What's wrong?" my mate asked tentatively.

I hesitated a long moment before speaking, "...I talked to ChiChi."

I saw him wince, "And...?"

"She wanted full custody of Goten," It was an effort to keep my voice normal, to not snarl and shout like the monster itching in my blood demanded, "She probably would have added Gohan too, but she can't control what he does anymore."

"Surely you didn't let her…" he began reproachfully, seeking out my gaze with his own.

"No." I said sharply, "I didn't. But I…" I broke off, attempting to quell my splitting headache by rubbing my knuckles against my temples, "I let slip about you and me, and she totally flipped."

He blinked, "I thought she already knew about…"

"Yeah but she didn't think I'd… she didn't think we'd…" my words were fast becoming a growl, tripping over each other, "She said she thought I wouldn't be - how did she put it? -" I drew a quick breath, "'Sucked in'... by you."

He turned and looked at me gently, "Kakarot, it's alright…"

My teeth bared themselves, "No, it's fucking not alright." I shot to my feet, the monster banging on the dam I'd thrown up, puncturing it and gradually bringing it down, "She…. insulted you… I wanted… I felt… I wished I could just…"

I trailed off when I heard a cracking, tinkling sound coming from the kitchen. Something glass had spontaneously shattered, likely because of the invisible waves of negative energy emanating from me like a poisonous gas.

"Calm down, Kakarot," Vegeta snapped, standing up and grabbing hold of my shoulder, "Just let it go; it's not a big deal…"

I shoved his hand off my shoulder, my teeth grinding frustratedly. I was still trembling, the monster now fully at large and not whispering, but screaming at me.

"What is wrong with you?" Vegeta demanded, "Yesterday it was fine because I let you and you were gentle; but now it's just irrational and childish, Kakarot! Just. Calm. Down!"

I covered my face with my hands, my power breaking free of the restraint I'd kept on it with the monster's encouragement, "I… shut up! I can't!"

For a long moment, he was silent, and I simmered with fury. Then I felt his gentle, ungloved hands holding my wrists, moving my hands down from my face. His face was imploring, beyond concerned; and it tempered the shouting of the monster, almost drowning it out.

"Come back to me," he murmured softly, "It's okay, I promise…"

"I... I was afraid I'd… I thought…" I broke off, my teeth clenching together, "…I wanted to strangle her…. I c-couldn't keep my hands from doing this," I opened the tight fists I'd kept up even after leaving ChiChi's house and showed him my hands. Where my fingernails had dug into my palms, the skin was cut and raw, bleeding in some places.

His eyes roved over the cuts, worry lining his face for a moment. Then he looked at me, "Relax… It's over now, it's alright."

I took a deep breath, trying to calm my nerves and drain the rest of the monster away.

"...It's not you," Vegeta soothed, "It's not your fault."

For the first time… I wondered if he knew about the monster. ...I wondered if others besides me could tell it was there, could hear it nattering at me.

No, you're not that fortunate... the monster sneered silkily as it faded, leaving me with a sense of dread I couldn't explain.

"You have hormones too, Kakarot." Vegeta went on slowly, "I'll have to tell you how to keep them under control, so you can stop punishing yourself over something that's not even yours to command."

Well… maybe that was a factor too. Since I'd made Vegeta my mate, and even before, I'd been high-strung and angry, more so than I'd ever been before. ...Maybe that was what brought the monster on in the first place.

Confused, exhausted, and frustrated, I pressed a hand to my forehead, the vicious headache returning with a vengeance.

"Right now, you just need to sleep." Vegeta said, guiding me to the foot of the stairs gently, "Bulma won't mind if you use her bed."

I nodded and traipsed up the stairs tiredly, too worn out to disobey. ...But in the back of my mind I seriously doubted I'd be able to sleep.

TBC