Hello all! Well, let me start by saying sorry for the wait. I had finals and my computer took a dump, to be blunt. So, I will continue to update, but until late September, you may find more mistakes in my writing, the reason? I'm using my moms mini computer and to tell you the truth it's hard to see and even harder to type on. I think the screen is only 7 inches or some crap like that… so, any who, ignore the mistakes as best you can.

Disclaimer: I own nothing. It all belongs to Mrs. Rowling and I thank her for allowing us to play with her creation and characters. (Damn tiny buttons)

Hermione paced the smallish room, angry at the meddling old man who called himself the headmaster, honestly, what headmaster drugged students and teachers? And not only was she mad at the headmaster, she was angry with the two professors that had known perfectly well that she needed answers and had refused to acknowledge her.

She glanced over to the two men who looked to be sleeping peacefully and sighed. It wasn't the first time she wished she could go back and change everything, but then again, going back in time is what started this entire disaster to begin with!

Groaning, she slumped against the wall in defeat. She was angry at them and for good reason, but the truth was, she should have never let any of it happen to begin with. She knew it wasn't wise to meddle in places that should have been left unexplored.

She couldn't blame them though, It wasn't a pleasant position that they had been put in, but they could have still showed some maturity and decency to at least tell her to piss off rather than to ignore her… it wasn't easy for her either.

She sighed again, maybe it was for the best? After all, she did want to marry someday and didn't know how she would chose. Were three way marriages allowed even? She didn't know but the whole relationship would be an unconventional mess. And children? Merlin, that would be a story she couldn't imagine explaining to any offspring… Why mum has two husbands. It would be awkward.

But her feelings were conflicted. Looking towards the two men again, she couldn't deny that she loved them, both of them and couldn't really imagine life without them in it.

The mud blood, the professor, and the ex-death eater… what a story that would make.

She couldn't deny that she longed for them, their touch, the way they made her feel complete and it saddened her to no end that it may very well be done and over with before it even began.

All this thinking was giving her a migraine.

"You're thinking too much. I could hear the wheels turning from across the room."

Hermiones head shot up to see Lucius, starring down with a grin on his face. She looked up at him briefly before lowering her head again, hiding the single tear that leaked from her eye.

That damn grin.

It made her weak. She could go blind and still see that grin in her mind forever. It was torture that she would remember it for the rest of her life and what was worse is that it hadn't changed in the slightest from when he was younger. Maybe if it had been different, she, well, her heart and brain, would be able to let go and realize that they were not the boys she had fallen for.

"I need to think." she replied, not looking up at him, "I've got a lot of things weighing on me right now."

Lucius sighed, and sat down next to her, ignoring that he was sitting on a dusty ground, there was no way that this was good for his robes, but in hind sight, he had woken up on the same dusty floor so perhaps they would need to be burned.. He didn't imaging them becoming clean.

"It would appear, Miss Granger, that we are in a huge mess here."

"Hermione." she stated simply, "After everything we've done, I think I've earned the right to be on a first name basis."

Lucius nodded, "You're right." the stated in a resigned voice, "We've been entirely to…. Involved, to continue with such formalities."

He was silent for a moment, unsure what to do from this point. He knew he had feelings for the girl, but it had happened so long ago and things had been so different from what they were today. He was grown up, had a child of his own and an ex-wife for Merlin's sake. She was still wet behind the ears, regardless of the whole war and the part she played in it. She didn't know about life.

There was also the fact that he was Lucius Malfoy, an ex-death eater, but a death eater none the less. How long had he hated her kind? Her blood? How many times had he told his own son that her kind didn't deserve magic? He didn't deserve the creature sitting next to him, not by a long shot. The headmaster and Hermione were right, they had to figure something out.

"Where do we go from here?" she finally asked, seeming as if she had read his thoughts. "We - I cannot go on like this. The not knowing what is going to happen while knowing everything that has happened. It hurts too much to live a life like this… with no closure."

Hermione stood from the floor and started to pace, "I do understand, you know." she stated without giving him a chance to speak, "How could you two continue with me? We are from different worlds, different classes, different eras. I'm a mud blood, you're a pure blood, and Severus, well, he's a half blood… what a mess of things that would make!"

She laughed hollowly, "I've ruined everyone's life, mine included. I knew when this whole thing started that it was a mistake and a big one at that, and now I've gone and got my feelings involved with two men who couldn't possibly see me as anything other than a student and a mud blood."

She choked up a bit. Saying it out loud, hearing it in her own voice - it knocked the wind from her lungs and she couldn't breathe. The truth was out. She had finally allowed herself to say it and it hurt, sweet Merlin and Morgana it hurt far worse than it ever should have. She didn't realize how deep it had gone.

She struggled to calm herself and to breathe, just breathe, but it wasn't working. She was having a panic attack. The words that had left her mouth hit home and now that it was so clear, so clear that she had been entertaining the thoughts of a love sick school girl, wishing and hoping for something that she could never have.

Just breathe

Was this room always so small? The walls seemed to be closing in on her. The air was slowly being sucked from the room - no wonder she couldn't catch her breath, she felt like she was dying inside.

"This hurts so much." She finally gasped out, "Why does it have to hurt so much?"

Lucius watched as she slowly fell apart. He was paralyzed as the words left her mouth. How could she think that she didn't deserve them? Was she nutters?

She didn't look to good. She was panicking and starting to wobble…. Shit!

He stood quickly to catch her before she hit the hard ground. The girl didn't even give him a chance to say what he needed to say before she went off the deep end. This had gone too far!

He laid her down gently before walking over to the still sleeping potions master and kicked him square in the knee.

"Wake up you idiot! We have to fix this."

Severus bolted upright, confused and in pain, "What the hell was that for?" he shouted.

"We need to fix this - enough with our bullshit and uncertainty." Lucius answered, "Do you know she thinks that it is SHE that doesn't deserves US?"

Severus's brow furrowed, "Why do you say that?"

"Because she worked herself into an all out tizzy and passed out after admitting that this whole thing was a mistake - we need to decide once and for all what we are doing." Lucius sighed, he was getting worked up over this girl, and Malfoys don't get worked up, "She deserves to know." he finally stated in a much lower voice.

Severus glanced over to the girl on the ground and sighed. Enough was enough.

Next chapter will be up shortly…. Damn tiny buttons are killing me.