John appeared from the swirling mas of people and came over to her with a pained look on his face.
"I'm sorry to tell you that your grandmother asked if I knew as a doctor if Sherlock has a low sex drive and if so how to rectify it" When he saw the look on her face, his face changed and he immediately became concerned.
"What's wrong?" he asked "you look pale, are you feeling ok?"
Squish turned to him and calming the onslaught of fear, disgust and horror, instead she forced herself to smile soothingly at John.
"Just feeling a little bit hot. And of course the only drink available is champagne or whiskey, which I have been told is unsuitable for my age."
John still looked a little uneasy but Squish pressed on.
"Does she want me?" she asked, slipping her arm through his and dragging him through the crush.
He nodded distractedly,
"I think we should hurry. When I left your grandmother was asking about whether Molly was fertile and he was about this close to punching someone or opening his mouth."
"I'd prefer him to punch someone" Squish decided, "that way we could pretend he's drunk"
"Can't we anyway?" John said as they advanced towards the lanky figure of Sherlock, "or we could say that he's on drugs."
"Yeah that'll do your reputation a world of good" she scoffed as they drew level with Sherlock, who turned to them with a look of pain on his face.
"John tell me you have your gun on you?" he said flatly, "I need to shoot my mother." Squish reached out a hand and soothingly patted his arm.
"Go and wind up Mycroft for a bit." She said calmly, "I'll look after her for a while and you'll feel better" He looked down at her oddly and seemed to take a step back for a second, before nodding. She gently pushed him away from her and he disappeared into the swell of the crowd. She turned to John as well.
"You go too." She said quietly, "There are loads of woman here who are single and all rich girls like a man in uniform"
"I'm not in uniform anymore" John pointed out and gestured at his attire.
"You're close enough." She said and steered him away from her as well, "go on, go find yourself a posh totty!" He grinned at her and followed Sherlock into the crowd. She waited until she was sure that they both had gone and her smile slipped from her face. She shivered and looked around, she knew that Moran or another of Jim's spies would be looking at her right that second, she felt very exposed. And afraid. Just at that moment a bejewelled hand grabbed her own. Immediately her smile was back in place and she was reaching down to kiss a wrinkled cheek.
"Hello Grandmother" she said as she straightened up and elegantly took a champagne flute off of a passing waiter
"Hello my darling girl." The old woman cried, "How are you? I have missed you. And worried about you" she scolded, you don't ever write to me. It's enough to break my heart."
Squish sighed and seated herself down on a nearby footstool at her Grandmother's feet. "Grandma, I text you and email you every week."
The old woman sighed, "It's not the same is it? Besides I don't hold with all this technology, I heard it can give you the C word."
Squish smirked a bit but ceased immediately as her grandmother scowled at her.
"Really Squish, Cancer is not a laughing matter." This last bit was said in a lowered tone as if by even saying the name cancer might begin its wicked assault on their bodies and mind.
"I'm sorry Grandma. I shouldn't say that. But anyway happy birthday, now don't I have a song to sing?" she asked as she stood up. The old woman clapped her hands and asked for sherry.
Four hours later Squish collapsed on her bed exhausted. The party was still going on though her grandmother had retired long ago. She had been trapped by a banker and a hedge fund manager who had tried to get her to play strip poker with them. She had politely refused and when they had persisted she had refused not so politely. Unfortunately for them the sound of her swearing had attracted her father.
Sherlock hadn't sworn at them or even deduced them. Instead he had punched both of them in the face and swept her a way in a cyclone of cheekbones and ego. He had told her to go to bed because they were leaving early tomorrow. When she had asked why, he replied that he couldn't stand another second of Mycroft 'telling me I should send you to school, like you'd learn anything there', she could hear him now poring chemicals into a test tube and a Bunsen burner being lit. These were the sounds of her childhood, that and the sweet melody of a violin that change to a storm in any moment. With these familiar sounds she was soon fast asleep.
1 week later she leant against the wall of Speedy's and began hyperventilating rapidly. A boy stood over her shoulder with a concerned look on his face. He reached over and gently pulled her towards his chest,
"What did I say?" he asked, "I only asked if your dad was in so I could meet him."
"And he is in" came Squish's voice muffled by the fact that her face was buried in his t-shirt, "and that's why I'm freaking out"
He gently pulled her face up and looked down at her, he didn't notice her shiver as she remembered another man who had done the same thing but in a much different context. But all thoughts of Moriarty vanished from her mind as he reached down and pressed his mouth against hers. When he lifted his head again, all she could do was smile in a strange stupor, he reached don and took her hand.
"So now can we go in" he asked as he pulled her towards the door, "he can't be all that bad"
She sighed as she put her key into the lock. "You have no idea" she said as she led him inside.
She grabbed his hand and squeezed it, "Just remember I'm adopted ok" she whispered as she took him up the stairs towards the flat, "Please?"
They stood in the sitting room and Squish gazed at the man who had raised who gazed back unblinkingly.
"Sherlock?" she said, "This is Alex. My umm boyfriend" Alex stepped forward
"It's pleasure to meet you sir." He said nervously, running a hand through his hair, "Squish has told me a lot about you." The silence was palpable and still Sherlock stared.
"Right" Squish said, "Well we'll be in my room if you want us. Ok?" and without another word she led Alex over the threshold into her room and closed the door. She sank visibly and then literally after the door had closed and sighed with relief as she leant against the wall.
"I thought that went quite well, all in all" A smile playing on her lips, as she leant upward and kissed Alex who looked both bewildered and bemused at the same time.
"Is he always like that" he asked as he joined her on the floor.
Squish put her head on his shoulder, "Like what?" she asked, "creepy? Starey? In answer to the first one, yes in the second no. He's normally much more talkative."
Alex nodded and kissed the top of her head.
"So what are we going to do?" he asked.
She smiled up at him, "I have a chess set and I don't think you could beat me in a month of Sundays."
"Yeah." He smiled, "we'll see about that."
A few hours later, John came in with three bags of shopping.
"Don't mind me then" he said at Sherlock who lay across the sofa with three nicotine patches on his arm.
"Hmm?" Sherlock mumbles, "s0orry John I was just trying to figure out if Squish's boyfriend believes in god or not? Ridiculous idea God"
"We've had this conversation Sherlock" john said as he put teabags in a cupboard and even you can't find that out about a person without having seen them"
Sherlock sat up lowly, "Oh I've seen him, and he's in her bedroom now"
John stopped dead, "You mean now?" he asked his voice shaking.
"Yes John now. And he's obviously an atheist. Good I like him more and more every second."
"Sherlock, your fifteen year old daughter and her boyfriend are alone in her room and you don't think that you should be worried?"
Sherlock gave him an exasperated sigh, "Please John, he obviously convinced het into letting him meet me. It is therefore unlikely that after making a good impression he would ruin it by losing his virginity mere minutes after meeting me in the room next door, is it?"
But John was already half way across the room and opening the door to Squish's bedroom. He briefly saw the two of them lying on her bed playing chess before Squish was shouting and forcibly ejecting him from the room.
"JOHN GET THE HELL OUT!" She screamed as she slammed the door behind him. John turned and was visibly surprised to see that Sherlock was doubled up with laughter.
"What so funny?" he demanded as he walked back to the kitchen and started making a cup of tea.
"You." Sherlock said simply, "I mean it's not every day you the one to commit the social faux pas while I was the one who right is it?"