Chapter 14 - Date

"Are you ok?" I was getting sick of the question. Scott had asked me it three times now – once when we first met on the way to Trig, once when we sat down for Trig, and now, during Trig.

"Yes, I'm fine, never been better." I watched the eyebrows of my best friend furrow angrily once more, but didn't care. I wasn't going to budge. Obviously he had found out from the other Wordsworthians that my evening and planned shenanigans with Blaine hadn't gone down too well, but the way he was trying to make me feel better about the whole situation was only making it worse. I certainly wasn't going to relive through words the anger and hurt I had experienced from rejection, and I certainly wasn't going to tell him about the revenge date I had set up with Gabriel to cope with said rejection. I wasn't planning on telling anyone about that.

"I will listen you know. I'm not a complete tool head." Ouch. That hurt. Scott had turned his head to stare down at his equation sheet and the sadness that he was actually resulting to working spread over me. For a second I thought about relenting, telling him everything, but reminded myself that if I did I would only receive a lecture and probably hurt him by lashing out anyway.

"All you need to know, is that I'm dealing with it." I replied with a half smile, trying to reach a happy medium. "But thanks."

When Trig had ended and Home Ec had been passed through in a daze I marched back to Wilde, not wanting to accidentally run into any seniors. Sadly, I had practically memorised Blaine's timetable and knew he was always too busy to even stop for coffee on a Friday, but it didn't stop my feet moving just that little bit faster and my chest relaxing when I saw my door was free from any heart-wrenching notes. The stupid thing was, I probably would have melted from a Blaine note – run over to Wordsworth and apologised for making 'such a silly assumption' – just to be with him again. But the absence of anything only reinforced my anger and made me more determined to have fun tonight.

I wasn't quite sure how to prepare for my date, seeing as I had never had a real one. For once I cursed my single room and the absence of Artem to guide me in outfit choices – but of course he couldn't be let in on the secret either. The fact I was embarrassed to tell people who I was going out with wasn't exactly a good start, but if Gabriel turned out to be some kind of God then they could find out later.

"Doo doo doo…" As I hummed to myself I casually turned on my ipod stereo – only to immediately curse and switch the song. Teenage Dream.

"I'm doing this for me." I exclaimed defiantly, internally wondering why I was trying to defend myself to a piece of plastic. "Blaine wanted me to see other people – he said." Picking out a salmon pink shirt I held it up to my torso, pondered for a minute and chucked it onto the growing pile of rejects on my bed.

When I eventually decided on my final outfit – cherry red skinny jeans, a white shirt, blue-buttoned cardigan and a bow tie to finish it off – it was nearly seven o'clock. Gabriel had insisted that he 'pick me up' so I heard the customary three knocks on my door, checked my hair one more time in the mirror and opened the door.

I have to say, he looked adorable. Gabriel had gone along the same smart casual vain as me, but looked like an English schoolboy, with a ridiculously cute argyle tank top over a crème patterned shirt and brown cords that made his legs seem like beanpoles. I was surprised I'd never noticed before how attractive he could be with a bit of confidence – of course it was nowhere near the heart-pounding beauty Blaine exuded without even trying – but he was definitely cute.

"Hi." Gabriel said in what sounded more like an exhalation than actual words. His eyes had widened briefly upon glancing me up and down, but he quickly worked to regain his composure. "Are you ready to go?"

"Sure."

The setting for our romantic evening was just outside of Westerville – Gabriel drove us in his mini, which already had me impressed, until we reached the actual restaurant. Set up like an Italian bistro the layout was basically a hive of secluded booths designed to create a ridiculously romantic atmosphere. All the waiters were authentically European and we were shown to our tables without even a sideways glance – obviously a scenario like ours was not uncommon in these parts.

I saw Gabriel was slightly upset he couldn't be a gentleman and pull out my seat for me, but he let me scoot onto the squishy seats of our booth first, slipping in opposite afterwards with an excited smile on his face,

"Do you like?" He asked. I nodded not even trying to hide my impressed expression. It really was the ideal setting for a date.

"I heard loads of great things about it, but have been waiting for the right person to take." At this he blushed and I felt my cheeks colour too, but not for the same reasons. He was really taking this evening seriously – I hoped I wasn't going to break his heart. Picking up one of the tall menus I flicked it open and glanced over the selection of dishes. Immediately my eyes were drawn towards the prices and they widened. So this was why it was so nice… Looking up slyly at Gabriel I saw he had no such reaction and figured he must be used to dining in places like this. Not everyone in Dalton had to scrape their tuition fees from the bottom of the barrel.

Guessing I was going to have to grin and bear it, I looked through the dishes and eventually settled on a risotto that looked the least expensive and not too fattening. A smartly dressed waiter who smelt strongly of expensive cologne came to take our order and when he left I leant back into my sofa, trying to fully take in the whole environment.

"So…" Gabriel began. I could tell beneath the excitement he was still really nervous – there was still an air of awkwardness that surrounded him wherever he went. "Tell me more about yourself." As I pondered the question suddenly my brain stopped. Gabriel and I knew nothing about each other. I was on a date with someone I barely knew. I guessed that he must be rich, and that everyone seemed to know about him for some reason, but other than that I was completely clueless. Tell me more about yourself… How did you answer that?

"Um…" I struggled to respond and Gabriel's expression wavered.

"You're from Lima right?"

"Yeah." I responded quickly, glad for the prompt. "My dad recently just got re-married."

"Oh. That's nice. My parents have been separated since I was five." He glanced down at the table with no real change of expression and I wondered how to respond.

"Sorry."

"Oh, I don't mind. Better them be apart and happy then together and sad." Wow. Gabriel was turning out to be a lot more insightful than I had first thought.

Our drinks arrived and I stared down into the strange translucent brown of my Diet Coke, watching the ice cubes bounce up and down before grabbing hold of my straw to take a sip.

"Is that your favourite drink?" I looked up again and saw Gabriel drinking his iced tea like he was with the Queen. Was it? I had to ponder. I knew what Blaine's favourite drink was – a virgin cosmopolitan. I also knew that his coffee order was a medium drip, his favourite film was Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire and his favourite actor from a TV sitcom was Benjamin McKenzie… Oh Gaga.

"Um, well I dunno, probably yeah." My answer was rushed and burbled – I couldn't believe I was thinking about Blaine during a date with another guy. I couldn't believe I was thinking about Blaine at all. Gabriel seemed to notice, but he didn't say anything, raising his glass to his lips once more and giving me the same intense stare I'd seen all those weeks ago at the Wilde gathering.

My risotto was delicious – you certainly paid for the quality but it was very well presented. Gabriel had a steak, which seemed rather odd given his frail figure, and he picked around it and nibbled carefully at his vegetables. The conversation wasn't awkward, I realised I had misjudged him slightly and there was actually a lot more to his personality than there had first seemed, but there was no spark. My thoughts about Blaine began to come more frequently and at one point I even 'accidentally' stabbed myself with my fork to stop myself from imagining how the light from the lampshade above would have reflected beautifully off his shiny black hair. The rebound hadn't worked – I was still hopelessly in love with Blaine, and hurting from it.

As we pulled into the Dalton car park I began again to re-plan how I was going to tell Gabriel I didn't want to see him again. Or rather, that I couldn't see him. Every way I phrased it seemed like a kick in the teeth and as much as I knew it was impossible, I didn't want to hurt his feelings. I actually truly believed we could be friends, but of course he wasn't going to want to hear that at all. A click at my side brought me back to reality and I saw that my date had opened the car door for me. Smiling I stepped out and noticed that he was staring at me again. Maybe this was how I looked to Blaine – a hopeless, pathetic starer. Oh Marc Jacobs I didn't want to get to Wilde.

We walked the distance to Wilde in silence. The sky was dark now and I couldn't see the expression on Gabriel's face, although I did notice his hand repeatedly edge towards mine, only to return back to his side quickly. Once again the door was opened for me and my steps echoed down the corridor. We both walked past Gabriel's room (there was no way I was going to give him that idea) and as I fumbled around in my pocket for my room keys I heard Gabriel take a deep breath inwards, obviously preparing to say something big.

"Listen, Gabriel, I had fun tonight but-"

"-I had fun too." Oh no. I'd tried to speak first but had started in the wrong way – Gabriel's expression had brightened and I felt my stomach sink.

"I need to be honest with you, there's just no-"

And then it happened.

Completely interrupting my flow Gabriel leant forward and pressed a kiss to my lips. But this wasn't a chaste goodbye kiss – the kind of feeble kiss I'd have expected from him if we had hit it off. This was a full on snog. By letting out an exclamation of surprise I'd opened my mouth slightly, and before I knew what was happening there was tongue licking against my teeth and exploring the inside of my mouth. It felt amazing, far more intense than any of the kisses I'd imagined Blaine and I would have. My narrow imagination had never experienced anything like it.

Caught up in the emotions I let Gabriel kiss me for a considerable time, only realising exactly what I was doing when a crashing sound behind us broke us apart. I looked over his shoulder, feeling my eyes beginning to widen as the realisation hit me, when suddenly I froze. Blaine was there. Blaine was standing less than two metres away from us, having just come out of the toilets – his mouth formed into a perfect little oh. The crashing sound had come from the vase of flowers he'd been carrying, which was now shattered on the floor beneath his feet. Oh no.

"Blaine!" My exclamation was filled with a myriad of emotions – surprise, happiness, horror, embarrassment – but to my anguish the only one that was really audible was the dazed sound as I got my mouth to work on its own again. Blaine didn't respond, he didn't seem able to move from his horrified position. His hands were frozen still holding an imaginary vase and as I looked down at the flowers I realised in despair that they were lilies. My favourite.

"Blaine!" This time I sounded more desperate – the full realisation of what was now happening hitting me fully. Blaine had walked out of the toilets, probably just about to knock on my door and ask for forgiveness with my favourite flowers, and seen me kissing, no, making out with another guy.

"Kurt? What's wrong?" Gabriel was talking but I couldn't tear my eyes away from Blaine's, watching him reel in shock and anger. "Kurt?" I felt a hand on my arm and cringed, knowing what that would look like, what Gabriel thought it meant.

"Um, Blaine and I need to have a talk." At this I saw Blaine's expression finally break out of its hold, but only as he began to turn around to leave.

"No!" Leaping out to grab his arm I heard the crunch of glass beneath my feet. Luckily he stopped but our eyes didn't meet.

"Do you want me to stay? I can stay if you want…" Now Gabriel looked wary, but for once I didn't care about hurting his feelings.

"No, you should go." Without saying any more I turned back to Blaine and I heard a 'hmph' behind me as my date trudged away to his room.

"Blaine…" I began to talk as soon as the corridor was empty, but all at once Blaine flicked his arm violently so it broke free of my hand and stepped backwards, fire in his eyes.

"WHAT THE HELL KURT? WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?" My eyes had widened in surprise and it only seemed to make him madder, for a second I didn't even know how to respond.

"It's not what it looks like-"

"-Oh! So you expect me to see you MAKING OUT with another guy and just take it?"

"We went on a date, I didn't know he was going to kiss me!"

"YOU WENT ON A DATE? WITH GABRIEL?" I was completely confused. Blaine looked like he was about to punch a wall and in his violent movements was kicking the glass further across the floor. Suddenly I stopped defending myself. This was awfully familiar…

"Wait – are you mad at me?" Hazel eyes looked at me incredulously.

"OF COURSE I'M MAD!"

"But you told me I should see other people." At this he stopped. Confusion briefly graced his perfect features, before they creased up again into anger.

"Not like this! And not so soon!" No. This was not happening. Blaine was not doing this.

"Are you jealous?" I asked the question without any of the humour I normally would have. His expression wavered slightly.

"No!"

"Because if I remember correctly – you were the one that rejected me." Now he understood. And I understood too.

"You can't just come and go as you please Blaine – I'm a person too."

"I'm not-"

"-Yes you are! Of course you are! You said you didn't want me, that we were too different, but now you're having a go at me for moving on!" Oh no – moving on was not the right choice of words. Blaine's expression was warring with himself – I kept seeing flashes of different things and if I wasn't so angry myself might have been scared.

"Kurt stop doing this."

"You either want me or you don't!" My anger was building now, boiling up inside of me at Blaine's hypocrisy. How could he not understand?

"It doesn't work like that."

"YES IT DOES! STOP MAKING EXCUSES YOU INCONSIDERATE ASS! I WILL NOT HAVE YOU MESS WITH MY FEELINGS ANYMORE! IS THIS ALL A GAME FOR YOU BLAINE? DO YOU ENJOY PLAYING ME?"

Suddenly everything changed. Something in Blaine flipped – I don't know if I finally pissed him off enough to make him let rip, of if the wool had been pulled away from his eyes. But it happened.

"Maybe I do!" My whole body froze.

"What?"

"You heard me! Maybe I enjoy playing you!" I couldn't respond. Blaine had stepped forward, but for once I didn't want him to. His voice was filled with malice and his expression frightening.

"No…"

"Maybe this was all just a game, right from stage one! Maybe when I saw you on those stairs I saw a feeble little boy who would make a fun little challenge! Maybe I let you believe that I liked you, that I loved you, but now I'm BORED!" My whole body felt like ice. This wasn't happening, this wasn't happening… Blaine and I were friends…

"No… You don't mean it…" I could barely speak, my words all mumbling together as panic ripped through me. I waited for Blaine's expression to change, for his cruel sneer to fall away and be replaced with a joking smile. This had to be a joke right? Oh I was going to kill him for teasing me like this…

"I'm BORED Kurt! YOU BORE ME!" Blaine continued to shout, every syllable like a stake in my heart. He wasn't joking. His voice was filled with anger and pain but I couldn't even concentrate on it anymore.

"I never liked you."

And that was it.

"Get out." Blaine looked up. His whole body was still shaking from his anger, but for a split second he seemed confused.

"Get out." I tried to stop the tears from spilling from my eyes, tried to stop my humiliation showing in front of the guy that had not only broken my heart, but stamped and trodden on it until it was unrecognisable.

"GET OUT!" Now I was shaking – uncontrollable shakes that rippled through me and made me feel sick. I felt sick. The tears were falling fast now and I couldn't see anything.

"Ok, I'm going."

"GET OUT!" I didn't seem to be able to say anything else – every time my voice became more high pitched and horrendous, until I was practically shrieking it as Blaine turned to walk down the corridor. Somehow I still wanted him to stop, to tell me this had all been a big mistake, that he did love me. Footsteps echoed around the corridor and I screamed some more.

"GET OUT! GET OUT! GET OUT!" Eventually my sobs overtook the screaming so the sound died away into sickening gurgles. Tears filled my mouth and I began to choke, falling down onto my knees and resting my head onto the cold wooden floor.