Wedding Dress | eighteen

"Shino, I need to speak to you."

Shino turned to stare at his father, sitting in his usual large armchair, in utter surprise, more than a little confused at this sudden outburst of words. It wasn't that they were on bad terms with each other, but it simply wasn't in the Aburame nature to be vocal. For as long as he could remember, his interactions with his father had been pretty much limited to "train harder" and "it's time to eat".

"Yes, father." He moved slowly to stand before the man who had raised him, for once not having a clue what he might be thinking.

The older man cleared his throat, wondering where to start. "You should be thinking of getting married," he said in his usual blunt manner. "Have a son or two. You know that shinobi death rates are high; you can't afford to wait so long before…reproducing." He nodded imperiously, as if he hadn't casually just mentioned lifetime commitment to his rather anti-social son.

Shino blanched, adjusting his glasses self-consciously as he looked for a way out. "Of course, father," he replied smoothly. "I'll…go buy an engagement ring now."

And he dashed out of the house as fast as he could without looking ridiculous.

After that, Shino really had no choice but to wander around somewhat aimlessly. He had just returned from a mission the day before and he had a rest day today, which he had planned to spend at home relaxing. No chance of that now.

But Shino did somehow find himself walking to the only jeweler's in Konoha, and he did pick out an engagement ring—a delicate, beautiful circle of silver set with a clear diamond—after much prompting from the jeweler with the knowing wink. It was only after he emerged from the shop holding a small black bag with the precious box in it that he wondered what on earth he was going to do with the ring.

There certainly wasn't anyone to give it too at the moment.

Wishful thinking. That's all it will ever be, won't it?

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"Kurenai-sensei's daughter was beautiful, wasn't she?" Hinata gushed excitedly.

Team 8 was sitting at their usual after-training spot under the tree, chattering excitedly about their visit to Kurenai and her three-month-old daughter that morning. It had just been a routine visit to surprise her with the news that Kiba and Shino had made it to jonin level , but they'd managed to while away a good three hours cooing over the baby. At least, Kiba and Hinata had spent the time cooing while Shino had had a good chat with Shikamaru—who seemed to have taken the older woman under his wing in memory of his late sensei—about strategy and such.

"I can't wait to have my own children!" The words slipped out of Hinata's mouth before she had thought them through, and a slow flush crept up her cheeks when she met Kiba's eyes. Kiba gave a very uncharacteristic nervous laugh and looked away, but his hand found Hinata's and held it tightly.

Shino supposed he kind of understood where Hinata was coming from. He'd been apathetic towards children of any age before, but when he'd laid eyes on that little girl with the swirling red eyes and thick black hair, something changed. Maybe it was because he knew the girl's mother well; maybe it was because his father's talk had gotten him thinking about kids more; maybe he had matured; maybe he had found someone he wouldn't be averse to having kids with.

Whatever the reason, he'd wanted to hold that baby; more than that, he realized that he wanted a child to call his own.

Shino winced at the direction his thoughts were going. He was going soft, he really was. It seemed like ages ago that his goal had been to show everyone I'm better than them. And anyway, he was only eighteen, hardly an age to be thinking about having children, regardless of whatever his father said.

Rolling his eyes at himself, he turned his head to see Kiba lying on Hinata's lap, playing with a strand of her hair that was falling over his face. Kiba grinned sleepily when he saw Shino turn in his direction, closing his eyes and tilting his head up as Hinata traced the contours of his face with a gentle finger.

Shino was used to scenes like this. His teammates weren't much for public displays of affection—Hinata was much too shy for that—but they had their fair share of sweet moments with each other. For one thing, Kiba was always playing with Hinata's hair, which had grown very long but still had its silky shine and softness; Hinata often liked to slip her hand shyly into the crook of Kiba's elbow as they walked side by side.

Shino was used to it. After all, some things just didn't change, like the fact that they still did almost everything together as a team. So he was always there behind the happy couple, when they trained, when they ate, so much so that he didn't feel anything when he watched them now. He had learnt to be content just by watching.

Hinata didn't hold Shino's hand so much now, or touch his sleeve when talking to him, as she used to when they were little, and Kiba's exuberance scared her. She had Kiba now, and Akamaru. Now, when she felt nervous, her hand would find the soft fur of Akamaru's neck and her fingers would grip the white scruff so tightly her knuckles turned white.

Shino didn't really care. He'd hardly felt her tiny hand on his arm through his thick coat anyway, and he felt freer without her hanging off him all the time. She was just a teammate, a very good friend, the first person to accept him and his bugs unconditionally, the first girl he'd ever had an emotional bond to. And because she was happy, so was he.

Kiba too, of course. Shino's first real friend, who had gone through thick and thin with him. Shino wanted Kiba's happiness as well, and now that he was happy with Hinata, Shino was truly happy for him. He really was.

Liar.

Some days, Shino hated himself. Not for lying to himself, but for having to lie in the first place.

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Under the same tree again, but this time only two members of Team 8 were there. Hinata's head was heavy on his chest, and he could feel her shuddering breaths as she tried to stop crying. Shino's gaze was fixed on the top of her head as he stroked her hair softly, reverently.

"Tell me what happened," he murmured. Kiba had hurt her, he just knew it. Anger flamed in his chest, but it was a weak emotion; the joy over whelmed the anger—the triumph in knowing that she had come to him for comfort, that she was in his arms.

"S-sasuke." She choked out a single word, leaving Shino to puzzle out the meaning. Much to the rest of the Konoha Twelve's delight, the Uchiha had finally returned just a week ago. The village had hardly settled from the uproar that had arisen the moment he set foot in the perimeter, and he had already received a pardon from the Hokage. He had been reinstated as a Konoha shinobi, resuming his rival-friendship with Naruto and his idol status among the fangirls effortlessly.

"Sasuke?" he repeated blankly. He didn't see what the dark-eyed ninja had to do with Hinata or Kiba; unlike most of the other girls in Konoha, Hinata had never fallen for his dark good looks.

"Now that Sasuke is back, Sakura-san is interested in him again, so her relationship with Naruto-kun is kind of rocky. Then yesterday Kiba saw me talking to Naruto-kun," she whispered forlornly. "I was just talking normally, really! Shino-kun, I really didn't mean anything by it all, but Kiba…he got really angry." She slumped against Shino with an exhausted sigh, as if she had become tired of fighting, tired of proving herself, tired of pretending to be confident.

"Kiba should know better," Shino said helplessly, a sad attempt at consoling her. "You're would never think of cheating on him." He resumed stroking her hair, rubbing her back in small circles soothingly with his other hand. She shrugged, pushing slightly against his chest, and didn't reply, only turning her head so that she lay over his heart.

She loves Kiba, not you, Shino was frantically reminding himself, before he could spill his feelings out and destroy their friendship. But his mind drifted to the square box in a drawer of his table at home, and the way Hinata's eyes positively glowed when she was happy, her half-smile that could convey her pure joy.

I'd like to be the one to put that glow in her eyes and that smile on her face.

He was such a soppy romantic, he disgusted himself.

But a spark of hope had ignited in Shino. For the first time, he was on a level playing field, where Hinata's heart wasn't already taken by another. His chance was now, and he was going to take it.

He looked down her, lying motionless across him, breathing slowly—she'd fallen asleep. A slight smile tugged the side of Shino's mouth up; it was a strange expression on his face. He leaned his head back against the tree and his eyes drifted shut as well, although he wasn't asleep. He felt the soft breeze whisper past his face, the uneven ground beneath him, the solid weight of the sleeping girl in his lap.

Everything was perfect.