James carefully moves his daughter's legs into the sleeper, whispering "Please don't break, please don't break". She is so damn tiny. Jack says she was full term, past her due date. And yet, James isn't sure he's ever seen a baby so small. Even Emma, who was a preemie. Then again, he didn't hold her until she had put on some weight and came home from the hospital. Had Neal been so tiny? It's been close to 2 years and his memory is not his friend. Especially when he's low on sleep.

He zips up the front of the sleeper, a new fear taking over that it'll clip her chest and she'll start bleeding. God, when did he become one of those dads? Every move he makes, he's terrified he'll hurt her. He has to remind himself of what the nurse said.

"She's a baby. Not a porcelain doll."

No, a baby seems ten times more fragile than the creepy dolls that lined his mother's china cabinet.

James takes in the sleeper. It's bright pink, with two lime green frogs catching flies on the front. The feet have matching amphibians. He didn't pick it out. That day he stood in Target, he felt as if the world might swallow him whole. Luckily, a kind older woman that looked like she could be a grandma, saw how lost he was and took over. After learning Sera's age, she set off with selecting pacifiers, bottles, formula, diapers and clothes. She steered him away from things like baby food (she's too little) and a wipe warmer (impractical). James left with about a dozen bags and boxes containing a bassinet and car seat in the back of his Jeep. He hadn't even attempted to put in the car seat, going to the fire station where his good friend Robin installed it, no questions asked. The bassinet had been a bit of a challenge, but all in all only took 45 minutes. An hour later, he went back to the hospital to get his daughter. His life changed forever.

James lifts Sera into his arms and looks around his room. Before it felt spacious, big enough for a recliner and his vinyl collection. Now it looks like Babies R Us threw up. Next door is his office with floor to ceiling bookshelves and the glass globe he got as a gift from David when "Spencer Books" opened. Babies can't be around glass or pointy things. And realistically, they can only share a room for so long. The grandma at the store pointed out Sera can only sleep in a bassinet until she's 15 pounds. Then she'll need a crib. In a couple of years, a bed of her own. James can't picture surviving the next month, let alone 2 years.

"Guess I can kiss my office goodbye," he says to Sera. She's unimpressed, just looking at him. James knows from his little knowledge on babies that she probably can't even see him. He's a fuzzy blob at this point. "Matches how I feel."

He carries her into the kitchen. She's not due for a bottle yet. Yawning, he tries to place her into the Moses basket he was conned into buying on the table, only for her to shriek. He brings her back to his chest and she relaxes.

"Okay, okay. I guess today's the day I learn how to make coffee and hold a baby."

It's nearly impossible. He's trying to support her head while filling up the back of the keurig. James fumbles, adding the cup into the top. Halfway through, Sera is screaming, clearly unhappy with not being the center of attention.

"Jesus," James mumbles as he finally hears the coffee brewing. He rocks her gently, involuntarily humming a tune he's heard David use before with his own kids. Sera settles, her tiny eyelids opening and closing intermittently.

Upon hearing a knock at the door, he heads over and opens it. Belle stands there, with about half a dozen bags on her arm. James' instinct is to help, but he remembers the baby. Instead, he gestures for her to come in. She walks to the kitchen table and settles her treasures down, shaking out her arms. James takes her in. She's wearing a tight white t-shirt paired with black high waisted shorts, matching boots with a slight heel on her feet. Belle looks so put together, while he's still in yesterday's sweats.

"I got bacon and egg sandwiches. I figured you weren't a vegetarian."

"God no."

Belle chuckles, pulling the food out of the brown paper bag. "I brought some other stuff. The brezza, clothes, some spare bottles."

James nods. "Thanks, I really appreciate it."

"It's no problem."

James goes to settle Sera down once more, only for her to start her fussing again. He groans, settling into a chair.

"She won't let me put her down. How do you get anything done with one arm?"

"It's not easy. But there are alternatives."

She reaches into a canvas bag and removes a beige blanket looking contraption with sleeves.

"I carried Gideon for probably the first 6 months of his life."

"Like a kangaroo?"

Belle smiles. "It helps them feel safe, knowing you're right there."

James looks down at his daughter. She's content again. How can someone feel safe with him? He doesn't even feel safe with himself.

"I can show you. If you want."

James nods. Belle shows him how to hold the baby guiding the wrap around her and up his broad shoulders. He bites his lip feeling her warm fingers against his skin. She's standing just inches from him, smelling like pineapple. He stops himself. This isn't foreplay. She's teaching him how to wear his baby.

Belle takes a few steps back when she's done. He moves around a bit, Sera staying firmly in place. Her tiny fingers enter her mouth and she begins to make a sucking noise. James bites his lip to suppress a smile.

"Wow. This thing is like magic," he mutters as the keurig beeps .

"And now you can pour me coffee."

James rolls his eyes. "How do you take it?"

"Milk, no sugar."

He retrieves the carton from the fridge, giving it a quick sniff. After grabbing two heavy navy blue mugs, he puts them under the nozzle of the machine, watching it distribute the coffee equally. Sera is content, sucking away on her index and middle fingers as she's snuggled against his chest. Not a peep is made while he carries everything over to the now cleared table. He sits besides Belle, passing over her mug and the milk. James takes three big gulps of his black coffee, moaning in delight. Belle crinkles her eyebrows.

"What?" he asks.

"You drink your coffee black?"

"Yeah, because I like the taste. I don't need to hide it with a bunch of crap."

"They say you shouldn't trust someone that drinks black coffee."

"Then don't trust me," he counters.

She rolls her eyes, pouring in the milk and stirring it a bit. "How was the rest of your night?"

"Bearable. She slept better with the machine. Woke up an hour ago screaming for a bottle. Now, she's…chill."

"You sound unsure."

"It's not like she can tell me if I'm messing up."

"Babies aren't easy by any means, but it's also hard to really mess up. You'd have to actively try. Feed them when they're hungry, change them when wet. Support the head until they can hold it themselves."

"That's one of my biggest fears. Or I was reading online about flat heads. Those helmets look fucking terrifying."

Belle smiles. "Stay away from the internet. It convinced me of all sorts of horrifying things when I was pregnant."

James nods, unconvinced. "But the helmet…"

"Yes, it's real. There's a lot you can do to avoid it."

James sighs, taking another sip of his coffee before digging into the breakfast sandwich.

"Have you told anyone?" Belle asks. "About her, I mean."

James shakes his head. "Well, my friend, Robin, knows. He's a firefighter and helped me install the car seat. But I haven't told my brother or anyone else."

"Why not?"

"David's on vacation. Doesn't seem like something you blurt out in the text or over the phone."

"True."

"And everyone else…I don't know. How do you announce this sort of thing? Hey, I just found out I have a kid and I don't know what the hell I'm doing. Please don't call CPS."'

Belle's lips tug upwards. "You could do what I did. Just post it on Facebook."

"Really?"

"I didn't know how else to do it. I told my father in person, but other than that, everyone got a picture of my pee stick on their timeline."

"Damn. That's bold."

"I knew early on some would judge. I had to say fuck it."

"But why would they judge? You were married, right?"

Belle nods, taking a few bites of her sandwich and sips of coffee. It takes her a few moments to answer.

"My ex is quite a bit older than me."

"How much?"

"I'm 29. He's 47." James lets out a low whistle. "Yeah. Already, people thought that I was crazy. Combined with his past, they knew what was going to happen."

James raises an eyebrow. "His past?"

Belle drums her fingers on the side of her mug. "Craven was married before. They had a son. He passed away when he was 8. It made Craven go to a dark place."

James frowns, looking down at Sera. He's only had her a few days and he can't imagine losing her. "That's awful."

"Gid wasn't planned. At all. Craven didn't want more kids. I was good with never being a mom. Then it happened. He was happy at first, but everyone knew he wasn't ready. Not truly. It's only been 6 years since he lost Bailey."

"So, is that what happened? He's just not ready?"

Belle holds her breath for a moment, before slowly exhaling. "He's around as much as he can be. He loves Gideon."

She doesn't offer more and he respects that. The two barely said more than 3 words to each other until the night before. She owes him nothing.

"You will have to tell people," Belle says, changing the subject. "It's not possible to hide her forever."

"I'm going to. I just want to tell David and Mary Margaret first. They deserve to hear it from me, not some social media blast."

"But then you will?"

James scoffs. "Why do you care so much?"

"Are you ashamed of her?"

James' eyes widen and he grips the smooth wrap.

"No!" Sera whimpers, causing him to lower his voice. "I'm not ashamed of her. If anything, she should be ashamed of me."

"Why?"

"What do I have to offer her? Financially, sure. But both fathers I had were bastards. One was a drunk, the other…" He trails off, shaking his head. "What did you call me? The town bicycle?" Belle flinches. "I don't know what I'm doing. She deserves so much more than me. And I know that. So will everyone else."

Belle frowns. He lets out a deep breath, leaning back in his chair.

"I felt the same way," she whispers. "Well, not the town bicycle part." He rolls his eyes. "But seriously. I had a shit dad, mom died when I was 10. Like I said, I didn't even want kids. I was getting a divorce. I was sure I would let him down. But he looks at me with those big eyes and a crooked smile…and I figure I must not fuck up completely."

James bites his lip. "Yeah, but you're not me."

"Maybe not, but the fact that you're so damn worried about hurting her says a lot."

"I guess," he mumbles.

They sit in silence for a bit, eating their breakfast and sipping the coffee. Eventually, he rises and starts gathering the dishes.

"Have you thought about childcare?"

James tilts his head back. "Jesus. I knew there was something I forgot."

"You have your own business, right?"

"Yeah. I told my manager I needed a couple of weeks off for a family emergency and I know she can hold down the fort, but I don't know what to do going forward."

"What's your schedule like?"

James scratched the back of his neck. "Usually pretty early until mid afternoon. I have a reliable staff and management team but sometimes I have to work nights."

"You can definitely find a daycare that'll fit the day shifts. I can see if Gid's has any openings. It's an amazing place. Small ratios, kind teachers, clean, safe, state acrettited. Not very expensive either."

James smiles a little. She had him at safe. "That'd be great, thanks."

"And as for nights…well, I'm off by 5."

He pauses. "Belle…"

She shrugs. "I have Gideon most of the time but I could manage."

"I can't ask you to do that."

"You're not asking. I'm telling." She sighs off his conflicted face. "I know it's not easy to trust anyone with your child, but I have the experience."

"It's not experience I'm worried about. I'm just…I've been a dick to you for a year."

"Not a dick."

"I ignored you."

"So? You need help. I'm here."

James doesn't get it. So many people in his life have walked away and for good reason. He doesn't let just anyone in. There's David, Mary Margaret, Robin and Carla. But other than that…

Sera stirs against his chest. She needs the best. And right now, that's Belle.

"Alright. But I'll pay you."

"Sounds good to me." Belle reaches down for one of the bags. "Now, let me introduce you to your new best friend. The baby brezza."