Awkwardly Silent Flight
Tony and Ziva left Vance's office with Gibbs one step behind. They grabbed their bags from their desks and walked to the elevator, their eyes meeting once the doors were closed. Tony could see confusion and hurt on her face. She could see curiosity and care on his. She blinked, but didn't remove her eyes from him, something she hadn't done in a while.
"So, Paris?" she said, hoping that some conversation was better than silence.
"Yup," Tony replied.
Paris. It was on both of their minds. Paris was the city of love. Paris was a place of romance. Paris was a city that changed people. Paris would surely change them too, but to what degree and in which direction? That was what they both wondered.
Ziva hadn't been entirely reluctant to go. She was concerned about spending quality alone time with Tony, since she was keeping so much inside her right now. She was concerned that he would ask her to talk about things she wasn't ready to talk about. She was also concerned for the deep want she felt for him. She had forgotten about it for a while, but as she stood there, lost in Tony's eyes, she remembered it. She blinked again.
Tony was not at all reluctant to go. He was a little concerned though. He was concerned about spending that much time alone with Ziva. Would she want to talk about what had happened to her? A part of him hoped so, but the other part of him hoped not. He wasn't going to push. It wasn't his place. She would open up when she was ready to and not before then. He was concerned about how he felt about her and about how that affected her, since she had to know. He was worried about her and hoped that he could find some comfort for her there as she stood there, lost in her chocolate eyes. He blinked.
"I want to see the Eiffel Tower," Tony said quietly as the elevator dinged.
"I have seen it once," Ziva said. "I did not get to stop and enjoy it."
"That's a shame. You should this time," he said quietly.
"Maybe I will," she said with a quarter of a smile appearing on her face.
Perhaps this would be alright. Although the care that Tony used with his words was a little scary to her. The care that he used with her all the time was scary. It told her too much. He cared about her, but she had known that for a very long time. He loved her, too, and that was what was so scary. She didn't know what to say or feel about it. She knew what she felt, but she didn't want to feel it right then and she denied it the power it should have over her.
"I'll pick you up in an hour so we can go to the airport?" Tony asked.
"Sure, Tony," Ziva said and turned to her car. "I will see you in an hour."
They got in their cars and went home. They packed and in exactly an hour Tony knocked on her door. He wasn't late. But, he never was when it concerned Ziva. He felt as though he had to make up for the time she had been in Somalia and he wasn't on time. He was never going to make that mistake again. She opened the door and found him standing there in more casual clothes than his work clothes. He took her bag down for him and she said nothing about this.
They arrived at the airport and checked into their flight and boarded the plane. They had an nine hour flight ahead of them and many, many miles to travel together. They were silent as they sat there on the plane.
Ziva didn't dare to sleep. She was afraid of sleeping these days. She had nightmares and she didn't want to share that with Tony and a plane full of strangers. She didn't want to sleep at all on this vacation, but she thought it would be okay once they got to the room. Sharing that with Tony was not so bad, though she knew she would see the concern in his eyes. She sighed as she glanced over at him.
He turned his gaze away quickly. Tony was concerned for Ziva; he was genuinely worried about her. She sat there, pretending she was fine, yet he could see the fear in her eyes. What was she so afraid of? Nothing was going to hurt her. How could he convince her of that? First, he had to show her that he trusted her and cared about her, but wasn't going to push her. He knew how to do that already and had already planned that far ahead and knew that Paris was the perfect place to do that. Second, he needed to earn her trust.
How the hell do you earn the trust of someone so broken and pretending like they are fine? He didn't know. He didn't know how to earn her trust. He knew how to show that he trusted her and cared about her and perhaps that would be enough to show her that she could still trust him. She said she trusted him, but did she? Did she trust him a little? He knew she wasn't lying, but there were definitely things that she didn't trust about anyone? He wanted her heart and that was going to take some time. He knew that.
The whole flight was silent and shared with avoided glances and awkward moments of silence. They didn't say a word to each other, as though they were complete strangers. They hardly looked at each other, though they did manage to catch each other staring a couple of times. They didn't do anything. They sat stiffly for the entire nine-hour flight. When it was over they were both very relieved to be off the plane and getting into a rented car and heading off to the hotel, where they would be able to get the rest they didn't get on the plane.
A/N – Here is chapter 3. I had not included the flight to Paris in "Forbidden" and so here it is for you. An awkward flight filled with thoughts and avoidances, only proving how strained things are between Tony and Ziva at the moment.