Chapter 26

He'd been sitting up on the roof for days now. It took a lot of patience to do this, but he knew they weren't looking for him anymore. He was dead...to them. ...and as long as they didn't find the other body, he could keep them thinking that he'd died in the destruction of his house.

However, he didn't dare do any actual following. He'd managed to track down the building, but finding the right room, the right floor was causing him difficulties. He was slowly eliminating windows. Very slowly. ...but he hadn't gotten where he was without cultivating patience.

A car pulled up to the sidewalk and two men got out. One of them was known to him. He smiled. He'd been watching his target for months. It would be almost as good to get this man as it would to get his actual target. It was tempting to see how much further he could drag his target down before finally removing him. There was no real reason for it, but these people were responsible for blowing his cover, for making his employers attempt to...to "fire" him. Suffering was in order if he could manage it well.

...but how well could he really do it? Once another attempt was made, they might decide to go even farther. Witness Protection, and that was a hard nut to crack, one he didn't want to bother with.

At this point, it was all academic anyway. He didn't know which room his target was in, and until he knew that, he couldn't possibly take him out. They were being too careful about that.

All he needed was a glimpse, just one look at one person and he would know where to focus, but so far, they weren't giving him even that much.

Ah, but a draw? Would he resist if the one man he trusted was injured? That brought another smile to his face. It would only take a moment. They weren't guarding the older man. He wasn't supposed to be in danger. What could he possibly have to do with the trial?

The smile grew. The more he thought about it, the better the idea seemed. Flush out his prey by taking down someone close to him. Not a fatal shot. No, something that would cause fear, panic...guilt. Yes.

It would only take a moment.

x.x.x.x.x.x.x

"Are you certain this is safe, Anthony?" Ducky asked as they walked into the building. "I've been worried about Timothy, but..."

"I'm more worried about McGee's mental health than his physical health, Ducky," Tony said, directing Ducky up the stairs to the third floor. "We've been taking precautions and McGee hasn't left the place since he got here. Even if someone tracked us to this building, which I doubt, they'd still have to find out where we are in the building."

"What's caused your concern?"

"Well...he talked to us a couple of days ago, said that he thinks he has to be miserable, that he can't get mad or he'll lose control. Ducky, I thought that he still hated us, but he says that he can't because it's too hard. It...it doesn't make me feel any better, but I don't think he likes being around Ziva and me and...and I just think that he could use a friendly visitor."

"I would wager that Timothy's emotions are complicated enough right now that assigning a definite label to them is impossible."

"Yeah...he still won't use his typewriter. Just sits there and stares at it. I know he wants to, but he won't."

"Why is his typewriter here?"

Ducky noticed that Tony avoided his eyes.

"Why, Anthony?"

"...well...because McGee pawned it a few months ago...and I bought it back. He didn't want you to know."

"I can understand why."

"Don't tell him I told you, please."

Ducky smiled. "Afraid that he might get angry at you again?"

Tony didn't smile. "No...we've kind of hit a...place where he can at least tolerate being around us all the time. I don't want to screw that up again."

Ducky nodded. "I understand. A beginning must be made somewhere."

Tony smiled then, with relief, and let Ducky into the apartment they were using as a safe house. Ziva was alert and at the ready when they entered but she instantly relaxed.

"Hello, Ducky! I feel as though we have all been exiled. How are you?"

"I am fine, Ziva. Where is Timothy?"

Ziva pointed to the closed door. "The door itself is broken. I am sure that McGee will let you in at any rate."

Ducky chuckled and didn't reply. Instead, he walked over and knocked.

"Timothy?"

No response. Ducky took that to mean "come in" and opened the door. Tim was sitting on the bed, staring at the typewriter. With a sigh, Ducky stepped in and closed the door.

"Timothy, you have people worried about you."

A ghost of a smile crossed Tim's lips.

"Funny how it's all happening now, isn't it?"

Ducky walked over to the bed and sat down beside Tim.

"A fault line will build up more and more pressure with no outward sign, sometimes for years, even centuries. The pressure will continue to build until finally, the two plates will slip, triggering an earthquake, massive destruction, all as a result of building pressure with no release."

Tim smiled slightly, still looking at the typewriter. "So...when does the destruction stop and rebuilding start?"

Ducky turned Tim toward him.

"It stops when the pressure has been released. Days of aftershocks, sometimes causing as much damage as the initial jolt. That's for tectonic plates, Timothy. For human beings, the rebuilding can begin any time the man is ready to start. Are you?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because a lot of the damage is permanent," Tim said, continuing the metaphor. "The infrastructure has been destroyed. It's best to give up and move on."

"I see nothing that has been destroyed, Timothy. I see a man who has fallen, not a man who has been destroyed. The problem is that you're too convinced that you can't get up again. Let yourself believe."

Tim's eyes moved back to the typewriter.

"It would look good on the desk that...that G-Gibbs built."

So few people would realize what a struggle it was for Tim to say that name.

"Yes, it would."

"But my life doesn't have room for it."

"Perhaps it's time to start making room."

There was a long silence and then Tim took a breath...and gave an answer Ducky hadn't expected.

"Maybe it is."

Ducky tried to keep himself from pushing, but he felt a stirring of hope that he hadn't for a long time.

x.x.x.x.x.x.x

"What did Gibbs say?" Ziva asked.

"About McGee or about the case?"

"Either."

"The guy they found in the house couldn't be Collier."

"Then, who is it?"

"Alexander Donovan."

"But they look so similar."

"Yeah. The resemblance is only skin deep apparently."

"How do they know?"

"Because of when he was released from prison. David Collier showed up when Donovan was still in prison."

Ziva sighed. "So...who was he?"

"Current theory is that he and the other guy Jamie saw in the car were hired to get rid of Collier...a permanent termination of his contract since he had failed to kill McGee, and since we'd tracked him down."

"He was of no further use to them. Is there anything to tie these people to Grant or any of the others?"

"Not so far. Everything was destroyed in Collier's place. Abby's doing her best trying to put some things together. We've even got the FBI helping out with the investigation."

"Gibbs is allowing that?"

"Not willingly, I'm sure. I think Vance forced him."

Ziva nodded knowingly...and then looked at Tony with concern.

"We have not been looking for Collier, Tony. We have assumed he was dead."

"I know. Believe me, I've thought of that. We're looking into moving McGee somewhere else."

"What about Witness Protection?"

"Not going that route at the moment."

"Why not?"

"I think it's because the trial's coming up so soon, but I don't know. They didn't tell me that."

"All right. ...so what about McGee?"

"Gibbs didn't say much. Told me that he'd talked to McGee, that he'd said some of the same things to Gibbs that he said to us. McGee's messed up."

"Yes, Tony. We knew that already."

"No, he's too messed up. You think some of it is an act?"

"An act?"

"Not all of it. I'm just trying to figure out what to do next. We're marking time right now."

Ziva got up and walked to the kitchen.

"I think...I am glad that all this has happened."

"Glad?"

She turned back. "McGee would never have spoken to us if he had not been forced to do so. He would never have bothered. Now, we know that he has been having trouble. We know that he does not hate us, and we know that he has not forgiven us. We also know that he is still struggling against what he himself feels he must do. ...and we can help him."

"Not if he won't let us."

"No, Tony, we can help him. You and I both understand the feeling of needing control. We both know how that feels. It is our fault we did not consider that to be a problem, but now that we know it still is a struggle for him, we can do our best to help."

"Neither of us were ever this bad."

"No, perhaps not, but that is why we are not the only ones who can help. Have you not brought Ducky here for that reason?"

Tony shrugged and smiled.

"It is not an act, Tony. It is someone facing reality and wondering if he can truly bear it."

Ziva said nothing more.

x.x.x.x.x.x.x

"Have you said their names yet?"

Tim shook his head.

"Gibbs is difficult enough for you?"

A nod.

Ducky smiled. "The names have no power over you, Timothy, and you will gain more ground in removing your fear of their names. Try it now while they are absent."

Tim shook his head again.

"Yes, Timothy. Say their names. Whisper them if you like. Just speak the names that frighten you."

Tim swallowed.

"Remember, Timothy, that you know these names have no power over you...except that which you choose to give them."

"I know. I tell myself that...but..."

"Do it now, Timothy. Say their names."

Tim laughed a little. "Seems so stupid."

"It's not."

"I know they're just names."

"Then, say them."

"Tony...Ziva..." Then, he took a breath and laughed at himself.

Ducky smiled and put an arm around his shoulders.

"And the world did not end, nor did you lose your sanity. Well done, lad."

"Kind of pitiful that I reduced that isn't it."

"No. It's not. It is sad, but not pitiful."

"So...what now?"

"One step at a time. I believe that you'll be moved from here soon."

"Why?"

"It appears the man who attacked you at your friend's home was not killed in the explosion that destroyed his home. They wish to be cautious although they are hoping that it is only a precaution."

"Yeah, what are the odds of that?"

"I don't know. I have not been privy to all the conversations. I know you feel cut off here, but time is passing quickly. Things will go as they need to."

"Right. Thanks, Ducky. I really...really..."

"I know, lad. It's all right." Ducky stood, but Tim stood as well and grabbed his arm.

"No, I need to say it. If I need to say...their names, I need to tell you as well."

"What, lad?"

"I've really needed you through all this. If you hadn't been here to help me...I'd probably be dead now, Ducky. Even with how my life has been going, I appreciate that. Thank you."

Ducky hugged Tim quickly.

"Oh, Timothy. I would do it all again. No matter what. I consider it time well spent."

Tim walked with him to the door and actually walked out into the main room with him.

"Ready to go, Ducky?" Tony asked.

"Yes, I believe so."

"All right. Let's get going."

Ducky squeezed Tim's arm and then nodded. Ziva walked with them to the door. Tony opened it and looked out first and then headed out.

"Hey...T-Tony?" Tim said suddenly.

Tony looked back, his eyes widening in surprise.

"Yeah?"

"Thanks...for bringing Ducky here."

Tony paused for a minute and then grinned, almost like he used to. "You never know what I'm gonna do, McGee."

Tim managed a shaky smile.

They walked out.

"Ducky...I never realized until just now how long it's been since he said my name, even while we've been talking to him."

"Yes. I'm surprised he managed it," Ducky said. "It was quite heartening."

"Why is it like this?"

"I don't know, Anthony. Suffice it to say that Timothy is as much of the problem as anyone else. I think the phrase 'his own worst enemy' is appropriate."

Tony smiled and opened the door to the street. One quick glance around and then out.

Ducky walked along with him, glad that he'd been permitted to come.

...and then his mind registered a violent force, throwing him backward and down to the ground. It was quite a surprise and he was trying to figure out what it was when he heard a distant crack and then Tony's voice calling his name. He struggled to understand what had just happened when Tony's face hovered over him.

"Ducky, stay still. I've already called for help. Just stay still."

Ducky blinked at him. He felt no pain as yet and so he wondered what was going on...but one thought came to him.

"This is not Timothy's fault," he whispered.

"I know it's not, Ducky. Just stay still," Tony repeated.

"No...tell him."

There was a rushing sound in his ears and darkness crept into his vision.

x.x.x.x.x.x.x

He smiled, watching through his scope, aiming at the doorway.

It would only take a moment.

Just one moment.