Disclaimer: I so own Camp Rock. Totally. It's crazy, the things I dream at night...
OOOH ITS THE SMITCHIE DATE CHAPTER!
Also, I don't own Sharpies. Like I own them, but I don't own the company... yeah. I don't know, it makes sense in my mind!
I glanced anxiously at my watch again, shifting my weight to my other leg. Katie gripped my hand and stared around with her wide blue eyes. She'd refused to go to the Campfire Jam with Mitchie, which meant a change of planes for me and Shane. It was 8:17, and Shane had yet to show up. Back at the stage, I could hear someone wailing song lyrics into a mike.
"Mommy, look! A princess car!" I looked down the dirt road leading up to the camp, and sure enough, a white stretch limo was coming towards us. Katie bounced excitedly as I hoped fervently that it wasn't Shane in the limo. But, of course, it was.
"Hey, Mitchie. Hey..." he trailed off, realizing he didn't know my younger daughter's name.
"Katie. She wanted to come with us instead of going to the Campfire Jam, and I didn't want her throwing a tantrum in the middle of the camp." I looked apologetically at Shane, who simply nodded and held the door open for us. Katie insisted on sitting in the middle, and I stared out the window at the trees flying by.
"So, where are we going?" I asked when the trees disappeared, city lights replacing them. We'd already had dinner back at the camp with everyone else two hours ago, so I knew we weren't going to a meal.
"Nothing too fancy. I though we'd just get some ice cream and take a walk in the park." I nodded and turned my attention back out the window, butterflies fluttering nervously in my stomach. Wait, butterflies? No, bad Mitchie! You hate Shane! The sun hadn't completely set yet, but soon it would disappear over the horizon. The fading sunlight threw colors across the clouds, dyeing them orange and yellow and even purple in some places.
The driver dropped us off at the ice cream parlor and I took Katie's hand as we walked in together. Shane go chocolate, Katie got vanilla, and I got chocolate Chip Cookie Dough (AN: Best ice cream flavor EVER! I LOVE it!) As we were leaving, a worker handed Katie a balloon with the shop's logo on it, and I began searching through my purse, knowing what Katie would want to do. We sat on one of the park's benches until I found a Sharpie and handed it to Katie. After writing something for a minute or two, she handed the Sharpie back to me, and I wrote my own message on the balloon.
Katie stood up, and I knelt down next to her, my hand covering hers. On the count of three, we let go of the string together and watched the balloon float upwards until it was out of sight. I could feel Shane's gaze on us throughout the entire thing, so I told Katie to go play on the play ground, then sat back on the bench.
"What was that?" Shane asked, resting his arm casually on the back of the bench. I took a few calming breaths, getting rid of the lump that had risen in my throat before answering.
"When Katie was born, we found out that Joe's mother was dying of cancer. Katie doesn't remember her, but Mitchie took the news pretty hard. So Joe and I used to take her to the park and buy a balloon. We would take turns writing messages on it for Marie, then we would release it together. We told her that it would float up to Grandma Marie in heaven, and that she would be able to read what we had written."
"So, that was for her grandmother?"
"No, it was for her father. It's a healing exercise." I swallowed as the lump returned. "We release balloons for Joe every time we get, and it's really been helping the girls."
"But has it been helping you?" I shook my head silently. I didn't trust myself to talk. I hadn't told anyone but my parents and Dylan that, and here I was, spilling my guts to Shane. Maybe it was because we'd been best friends once, a long time ago. Tears began to prick my eyes.
No matter what I did, the hurt never left. It had faded a little since the accident, but it never completely went away. Shane hugged me closer, and I let him as the tears started to spill over. I felt embarrassed to be crying over another man in front of Shane, but something about another person being there to comfort me made it seem a little less awkward. It was almost as if we'd gone back in time, back to when we were inseparable, and could tell each other everything, and we would cry to each other all the time. As we got older, it became more and more awkward, until we just stopped crying in front of each other altogether. But now it was as if we were five and seven all over again- Shane just comforted me as best as he could while I ruined his shirt.
Eventually my tears became hiccups, and even when the hiccups subsided, Shane still held me, my head on his chest. And I let him. I hadn't realized how much I'd missed this. I was still sad about Joe's death, but something about the way Shane held me told me that he was willing to help me through it and be there for me, just like old times.
"You didn't fall asleep, did you?" he asked, his breath warm on my ear and sending shivers up my spine.
"No," I whispered. "No, I'm still awake." Shane slowly lifted his arm from my shoulders, and I unwillingly sat up. I sniffled a few times, wiping my still-wet cheeks with my sleeves and looked at my watch. It was already 9:30, and way past Katie's bedtime. Lights out for the campers was in thirty minutes and the instructors had to go around the camp, making sure that the lights really were out and the campers were in bed. I called Katie back over, and she ran back, yawning and rubbing her eyes. The limo was waiting for us back at the ice cream parlor, and the three of us climbed back in.
Half-way through the ride, Katie fell asleep, so I rested her head on my lap, stroking her hair. Shane's arm was draped casually around my shoulders, just like it had been all those years ago at the mall. I mentally slapped myself, reminding me that I couldn't live in the past. The entire ride was silent, and by the time we pulled up to the camp, I was beginning to go insane from the nothingness. I wouldn't last a day if I went deaf.
Shane walked back to my cabin with me, waiting patiently as I laid Katie down on her bed and came back outside. We made our rounds around the camp together, then continued walking. Eventually, we wound our way back down to the lake and sat down on a log, side by side.
"You know, when I came here, I used to sneak out at night and come down here, just to think," Shane said after a minute of silence. I turned to look at him and saw that he was just staring out at the lake, a distant look in his eyes. I lowered my gaze to my hands as he continued.
"Most of the time it was just to think about my future. You know, the normal questions of 'Who am I going to grow up to be?' That sort of thing." Shane looked at me, and I couldn't help but look back.
"If I'd known that this is what my life would be like in twenty-five years, I never would have competed in Final Jam." I blushed, instantly glad for the darkness.
"It's funny," I remarked quietly. "When we were little, I always used to imagine marrying you. I always though we'd still live in Loch Arbour, in that tiny lake house we'd found. God, I haven't been there in forever. It's probably all over grown and falling down by now." I leaned back on my hands, remembering that summer twenty years ago. We were so young, convinced we were in love. Looking back, I realized I had no idea what love was, not truly. I heard Shane sigh next to me.
"What happened to us, Shane?" I asked quietly, looking back at him. "We used to be so close, and just look at us now. We haven't seen each other in two decades." Shane shook his head sadly, letting his head drop until his chin was almost touching his chest.
"And that entire time, I was convinced you hated me. The last image I had of you was of you telling me to get out and closing the door in my face.
"I'm sorry," I said, taking his hand in mine, an action that surprised us both. His hand was freezing, but I couldn't seem to make myself let go. The next thing I knew, I was dozing off on Shane's shoulder, making him chuckle.
"Come on, we'd better get you to bed," Shane said, helping me to my feet. I mumbled something incoherent and began walking in the direction I thought me cabin was. However, I took a few steps and walked straight into something rough and hard, making me fall to the ground, much to Shane's amusement. I picked myself up off the ground, and was about to try again when Shane scooped me up.
"I don't trust you to walk right now," he joked. The last thing I remembered was wrapping my arms around his neck and closing my eyes.
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