Chapter 51: Who Am I
Nimbrethil said nothing to the githzerai woman Zhjaeve, merely led the way back to the Flagon. The woman had made her case and Nevalle had agreed to allow her her freedom so she could travel with the companions. Then he had asked them to wait while he spoke to Lord Nasher. After a couple of hours he had returned with the news that Nasher would not change his decision, and she had merely nodded and left, leaving Zhjaeve to follow as best she could. Her mind was in turmoil, her entire being rebelling at what they had done to her. They continued to cast chain after chain around her, trying to bind her closer and closer to the city and to themselves. She was beginning to despise Nasher in a way she had rarely despised any human. He cared only for the safety of his throne and the power it gave him and so he would throw anyone between him and the enemy, regardless of how they felt about it or what it would do to them. He would cower inside his castle and let others fight his battles. She'd bet her last gold coin that when all was said and done he would claim the glory for himself and all the sheep of the city would bleat their appreciation of his so called fine leadership.
Zhjaeve could sense some of the turmoil in the elf she followed, the Kalach-Cha, yet found it difficult to read deeper. The girl had remarkable mental control, unlike most of the people of this plane she had met, and the cleric couldn't help but be impressed. However, she could tell by the way the girl moved that she was not ready to listen further at the moment, so she kept silent. The road ahead would be a long one and she sensed this one would have more difficulty than most in walking that road. The more she watched, the more she got the impression that she was looking at a wild animal that had been caged and was trying to find a means of escape. The cleric knew that one wrong word could send the girl running for the ends of this plane and that would prove disastrous for all of them. As such, she was eager to meet the girl's companions and see if she could gather enough information to enable her to talk with the Kalach-Cha in a way that would help, not hinder, their mutual cause.
Nimbrethil opened the door of the Flagon and entered to find all of her companions waiting for her. Her gaze fell on the source of her earlier anger as he approached her and she scowled fiercely at Duncan, causing the man to stop in his tracks. She wasn't ready to deal with him or the others at this point. She quickly introduced the cleric to them and told them what had happened at Brelaina's office and about Nasher's decision. Then without another word she headed to her room and entered it, slamming and locking the door behind her.
After a couple moments of silence, everyone started talking at once, trying to make sense of what they just heard. Bishop watched them reacting and suddenly felt anger well inside him as he realized that none of them really understood what this was doing to Nim. "You're all acting like this is the best thing in the world, but that only shows how blind and stupid you are," he snarled, effectively silencing them. "Not one of you has a clue what this promotion and assignment means to Nim do you?"
"It means that she will now have even more resources to battle her enemies Bishop," Sand said eagerly. "Something that will give her the edge she needs."
"No, it doesn't mean that to her at all," he snorted. "To her it is a cage, a trap from which there is no escape. She was not meant for the cities, not meant to be walled up inside some moldy old keep. She needs to fly free, like her companion Thorondor, or she will wither and die. This promotion and assignment will kill her before this King of Shadows ever shows his face, for it will kill her spirit. Yet, not one of you can see that," he finished with contempt.
"Know that this is her fate and that she was destined to fight this battle," Zhjaeve stared hard at the man before her. "Know that there is no place which she can fly to that she will be safe. Know that the King of Shadows seeks her in order to destroy her, for she is the one who can destroy him. Know that this was decided long ago, before you were born, when the King of Shadows first threatened this plane."
"Know that a creature without spirit will not fight for its life," Bishop mocked her, his lips curled in a sneer.
"We need to talk to her, help her come to terms with this," Shandra said and started to head towards the back rooms.
"Don't bother, I seriously doubt she's in her room," Bishop chuckled, but it lacked any humor. "And don't even think about trying to find her, you'd only end up chasing your own tails. Besides I believe you're on her shit list at the moment."
"So what do you intend to do Bishop?" Duncan said angrily. "Going to go and help her run away?"
Bishop glared at him, his eyes filled with loathing. "No half-breed," he sneered and saw Duncan's fists clench in fury at the insult. "I'll bring your precious niece back for you, that is if she doesn't try to kill me first." He paced slowly towards the inn keeper. "You see I know her and understand her, and I know that of all of us I am the one she is most likely to not shoot on sight right now. She was already pissed off at the rest of you for your little chat earlier," he chuckled darkly. "I'm sure she would just love to show you how much she appreciated that." He grinned menacingly at Duncan as he fingered his swords. "Of course, she may still hold enough sentiment of family in her heart to allow you to get a few words out first."
Duncan felt his whole body tense with anger and his fists clenched. It took every ounce of self-control he possessed not to beat the crap out of the ranger at that moment. "One day Bishop she will see you for what you really are," he spat. "And when she does I will take great pleasure in beating the life out you."
"No Duncan, she sees me more clearly than you ever did," Bishop hissed. "She has guessed more about my past than you could even imagine and she understands me in a way no one else ever has." With that he turned and headed towards the front door, knowing that Nim had locked the door to the room. He would have to climb through the window to get his gear.
"What in the hells did he mean by that?" Duncan sputtered. "He's too much of a coward to admit to her all he's done, so how could she know anything about his past?"
"Know that like always seeks like," Zhjaeve answered him. "Know that the Kalach-Cha has much in common with that man and thus is able to understand what drives him. Know also that I believe he speaks true about how she is feeling for I have sensed such feelings in her."
"You know nothing about my niece so don't compare her to Bishop," Duncan spat. "By the gods, he has killed people for money. Nimbrethil would never do something like that, never." Shandra reached out and placed her hand on his arm in an effort to calm him. "She is nothing like him and if anyone here says otherwise they will have to deal with me."
Zhjaeve watched as the blond woman whispered to the distraught inn-keeper. She was very good at reading people and thus she knew that the man said what he did mainly because he despised the one called Bishop too much to accept anything else as true. However, she knew true words when they were spoken and knew that Bishop had not lied. He hadn't told the whole truth certainly, but what he did say rang true.
******
Nimbrethil was swimming in her favorite spot, an activity that usually relaxed her, but this time it wasn't helping. Climbing onto the bank, she flopped down on her back and stared up at the sky, hardly noticing the chill in the air. This was where she wanted to be, not inside a stifling keep with even more people crowding her, watching her. She didn't belong amongst them but could she leave it all behind? Sitting up, she wrapped her arms around her legs and rested her chin on her knees. She didn't know what to do anymore and that's what pissed her off the most. She had never felt this unsure of who she was, what she was, or where she was going.
Bishop reached down and petted Karnwyr's head and then watched as he trotted off to find his friend Thorondor. Nim had to know he was there but so far she had not acknowledged his presence. Silently he moved towards her and then stood staring down at her head. He had told Duncan he would bring her back, but he himself had little hope of doing that. He knew she didn't want any of this and he also knew how stubborn she could be. He had once told her he would enjoy trying to tame her, but he didn't really want to. She wasn't meant for the life that had been laid before her and he knew that with each passing week a little more of her would wither away. If she stayed and fulfilled her destiny, she would no longer be the Nim he had come to know and admire. She would be a shadow of that person and that was someone he didn't want to know.
Nimbrethil finally looked up at the man standing next to her and saw sympathy in his eyes. He understood her, understood what she felt for he would feel the same way if he was in her shoes. "If you're still interested, I'd like to take you up on your offer to leave all this behind and go where they will not find us."
"Actually I told them I would try to bring you back," he replied and saw her eyes widen in surprise. "Of course I wouldn't feel one bit of guilt for running off with you, if that's what you really want to do."
Nimbrethil jumped to her feet and began to pace along the shore. "That's the problem Bishop, I am not sure what I want anymore. It all seemed so simple not so long ago. How in the hells did things become so complicated?" Her voice was rising in pitch as her anger and frustration began to surge. "I used to know who I was, what I was, where I was going, but not anymore. I let them put one chain on me and now they are heaping more chains on me, tying me to them, to this life. If I'm going to break away then it's now or never," she stated flatly. "But according to that cleric Nevalle foisted on us there is no escape from this. If that's true then leaving would be the worst thing I could do, but staying will kill me as surely as this King of Shadows. I feel this in my heart," she finished and stood staring at him.
Bishop moved to stand in front of her, looking down at her eyes and seeing the turmoil there. "Oh I know how it feels, for I too was once in the same position as you are now. Hating what I had to do but not able to get away from it." He placed his hands on her arms and gently held her. "Sometimes survival means doing what is necessary no matter how unpleasant. But I know what it is like to be chained, to be denied the freedom to say 'no I won't do it'. I know how over time those chains drag you down, make you wonder if there is any way out. I know how they can crush your dreams, your hopes, your spirit until you don't know who you are anymore. I managed to find a way out only to fall into another trap and begin the whole thing all over again."
"Do you think that by handing out little tidbits of your past you can convince me to stay?" Nimbrethil sneered at him. "Keep dreaming."
Bishop gripped her arms tighter and pulled her closer to him. "No elf, I have no illusions that anything I say can change what you will do," his lips curled into a sneer of their own. "Unlike the other idiots I know you can't be controlled or tamed. You can do what you want, I'm just along for the ride," he said suggestively, his eyes raking over her naked body. He had opened up just a little to her and she had thrown it back in his face, so he struck back.
Nimbrethil's eyes narrowed, her anger finally bursting forth at his words. "Damn you to the hells Bishop," she snarled. "I'm not some toy for you to play with." She tried to free herself, struggling to break his hold. "Let me go or you'll be sorry," she hissed at him.
"Such fury in such a little package. You but whet my appetite wench," he snickered, her struggles exciting him. Suddenly he yelped as her teeth sank into his right arm and his grip loosened enough for her to get her left arm free. He flinched backwards as her nails raked his cheek, barely missing his eye. Quickly he grabbed and twisted her arm behind her back, staring down into her face which was filled with rage. "Let me refresh your memory on who I am and show you who you really are," he growled and bent down to sink his teeth into her neck hard enough to draw blood.
Nimbrethil shrieked at the sharp pain and began to fight in earnest, kicking and clawing at the man holding her, but unable to free herself. She felt him push her down, pinning her arms under her back as his legs covered hers. She was unarmed and at his mercy as he began to run his tongue over her, his teeth nipping at her skin, almost but not quite hard enough to draw more blood. She felt him take both of her hands in one of his, and felt him shift the other to loosen his trousers. Furiously, she struggled even harder but to no avail.
Bishop's eyes glittered as Nim struggled to free herself, knowing she was doomed to fail. Parting her legs he thrust into her hard, sliding in easily for she was more than ready for him. Watching her face, he began to drive himself in her and saw the moment her rage changed to pure, unadulterated lust. He felt her legs come up around him to hold him to her as her head thrashed back and forth. Bending down he kissed her fiercely, hungrily, releasing her arms as she began to move with him.
Nimbrehtil was on fire and when her arms were free she wrapped them around Bishop and pulled him tight to her, returning his kiss with the same ferocity. She growled in frustration at the shirt covering his skin, and digging her nails into it, tore it from his back, her nails gouging his skin as she did. As he reared back from the sudden pain she latched her teeth to his throat, drawing blood of her own. This caused him to begin moving faster and harder and she lost herself in the moment, "Yes, yes, yes," she moaned over and over again.
The feeling of her teeth sinking into his skin made him lose all control and with a snarl he began to thrust brutally into her, making her whole body shudder with the force of it. He could feel her hands continuing to claw at him as her head fell back, eyes closed. They were both covered in sweat now and panting with their exertions. He felt her body tense and then she screamed his name as she came and with a final hard thrust, he buried himself in her, howling her name as he gained his own release. The shudders rippled through both of them, seeming to go on and on. Finally, they lay still trying to catch their breath.
Nimbrethil stared up at him, not sure what she was feeling at the moment. When he had first started she hadn't wanted it, but something else had come to life inside her and taken over. Her eyes went to the small trickle of blood running down his throat and she gave into the urge that welled inside her to lick at it. She felt a shudder run through him as she did so.
Bishop opened his eyes and drew back to look at her, seeing a new understanding in her eyes. "You are wild and uncivilized, same as me," he growled. "No matter where you go or what you do, I won't let you forget that, ever. I won't let them keep you in chains, so you do whatever it is you feel you have to do to survive. If I see that you are starting to lose yourself I'll be sure to remind you of who you really are," he told her and bent down to place a gentle bite on her shoulder. "And if at some point you feel you can no longer stay, then we will leave and go wherever you wish."
Nimbrethil felt a shudder ripple through her body as his teeth scored her skin. When he finished speaking she gave him a wicked smile and she shifted her hips, feeling him harden inside her once more. "How about you remind me right now?" she growled low and saw a feral grin come to his face. As he began to thrust into her she never took her eyes from his, enjoying the flames burning in them which mirrored her own. It didn't take long before she once more lost herself in the pure rush of feeling he stirred in her.