Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds or any of its characters.
I still do not own Chex Mix.
Hotch and Rossi put up their hands in surrender. Rossi climbed the ladder out of the deep end, followed by Hotch.
The girls cheered.
"Hey!" Morgan said. "You can't just give up!"
"I'm old; I tire easily," Rossi explained. Being old had its perks. He regularly exploited his age to get out of work and awkward situations such as this one.
"You do not! What's your excuse, Hotch?" Morgan growled. He felt betrayed.
Hotch glared. "Morgan, without Rossi, we're sunk anyway."
"That's not an acceptable reason, Hotch," said Morgan.
"Fine," Hotch said. He pointed at Prentiss. "She scares me," he said.
Prentiss laughed in delight. Garcia and JJ high-fived her for scaring their supervisor.
Hotch and Rossi collapsed onto their lounge chairs.
Morgan turned back to where Garcia, JJ, and Prentiss were lurking, grinning at him. He sized up his chances, and decided to flee. "Just for the record," he said, "I could take all of you down here and now. Consider yourselves spared."
Prentiss rolled her eyes. "Yeah, right, I'm sure," she said sarcastically.
"Watch it, Prentiss," Morgan warned. He climbed out of the pool. He walked over to his lounge chair and snatched up his towel. Slinging it over his shoulders, he sat down on the end of his lounge chair. Sitting next to him was Reid's blue plastic Chex Mix bowl, which Morgan had tossed onto the chair earlier. He picked it up, and held it up to the light.
"Huh, what do you know? You can see through it," he muttered.
From where he was sitting at the edge of the pool, Reid whipped around and glared at Morgan. "See? I was right," Reid told him.
"Hey, I never doubted you, kid," Morgan said.
Reid held up his hands. "Can I have it back, now?"
"Sure." Morgan tossed the bowl at Reid's lap.
Reid tried to catch it, knocked it out of the way, and the bowl landed in the pool.
"That was so not my fault," Morgan defended. Reid glared at him.
Luckily, as Reid wasted no time in explaining, plastic floats. Otherwise, the bowl would have blended in with the pool lining on the bottom and would have been lost forever. Reid reached into the pool as far as he could. Morgan was tempted to push him in, but decided against it when he saw that Reid's goggles were not currently on his face. The kid would probably freak out if he got dunked, especially without his goggles on, and Morgan wasn't a mean person, really.
"Ha!" exclaimed Reid. He had successfully fished the bowl out of the pool. He hugged it close.
Hotch and Rossi relaxed in their lounge chairs.
"What is Reid's fascination with that bowl?" Hotch asked Rossi.
"I believe his fascination lies with the substance that the bowl once contained," Rossi replied, purposely using large words.
"Oh. Should we be worried about him? Wait. Now what are you doing?" Hotch demanded.
Rossi had pulled out several more wine glasses and was pouring a small amount of a different kind of soda into each. He then poured the contents of several glasses into one larger glass.
"I'm going through cocktail withdrawal," Rossi explained calmly.
He certainly was.
Rossi pulled out a straw and delicately spun the mixture in the glass, careful to avoid fizzing. Content with the result, which was brownish-beige, he took a sip and swirled it around in his mouth. He made a face.
"Disgusting," Rossi whispered. He turned around and discreetly poured out his mixture onto the grass behind his lounge chair.
Rossi poured a different mixture of sodas into his wineglass.
"I think it's you that I should be worried about," Hotch commented. This was just sad.
Rossi offered him a glass of mixed soda.
"No, thanks," Hotch grimaced.
"Your loss," Rossi shrugged. He took a sip, gagged, and ditched the mixture behind his chair.
Hotch sighed and shook his head.
Prentiss, JJ, and Garcia were talking in the shallow end of the pool, re-energized by their victory.
"Hey, what time do you think it is?" JJ asked, thinking of Henry and Jack.
"It's exactly two twenty-seven," called Reid.
"Oh, good. The boys won't be back for a while yet," JJ sighed.
"When do you expect them back?" Garcia asked.
"About four-thirty or so," JJ said.
"Hey, JJ?" Reid called.
"Yeah?"
"Since I gave you the correct time and all… well… can I have some more Chex Mix?" Reid held up the empty bowl.
JJ laughed. "Sure, Reid." She headed for the stairs to fetch the bag for him.
Garcia was faster. She leapt up onto the concrete and ran to her lounge chair, which was covered in vividly colored towels.
"Get back in the pool, JJ," Garcia growled threateningly.
"Um… okay?" JJ backed down the stairs.
"What about my Chex Mix?" Reid whined.
"If you cooperate, you shall get your Chex Mix," Garcia told him. "Listen up, all of you! Yes, even you, Rossi," Garcia called around.
Morgan flipped up his sunglasses with a finger. "What's going on, baby girl?"
Garcia picked up the several bags she had brought with her. This would be good.
"We are now going to explore Penelope Garcia's Bags of Wonder!" Garcia announced.
"Oh, dear," Prentiss murmured. She was praying that those bags held no swimsuits.
"I need a volunteer!" Garcia looked around. Prentiss and JJ looked uneasy. Hotch and Rossi were puzzled. Reid was flat-out terrified. Morgan raised his hand and stood up.
"Yeah, I'll help," Morgan said. He walked over to Garcia.
"Perfect," Garcia purred. This was exactly what she had planned; she knew Morgan would volunteer.
"Very well, Volunteer Morgan." Garcia paused dramatically. Then, "Restrain Reid! Quick!"
"What?" Reid squeaked.
Morgan laughed. He easily grabbed Reid's arms and held them behind Reid's back.
"What's going on, Garcia?" Reid whined. He tried to fight against Morgan, but the battle was lost before it began and he went limp.
From his lounge chair, Hotch was wondering why he had hired a man that went limp in a fight.
From the pool, JJ and Prentiss were wondering just where this was leading.
From his lounge chair, Rossi knew exactly where this was going, having peeked into Garcia's bags earlier. He chose not to say anything.
This was going to be extremely entertaining.