"You miscarried. I am sorry Dr. Brennan."
She was strong no tears fell when the news broke. But, Booth was crushed and the tears flowed. The doctor continued to speak to her, but she could not hear. Her baby gone. Had she known this, she'd never have been in doubt. If she could just turn back the clock.
"Tempe, you okay?" Booth asked when the doctor had left.
She remaind silent and just stared straight ahead bawling. She was not fit to be a mother, and this was the universe's way of telling her so.
"No. It is not fair. Just take me home," she cried into his shoulder.
"I can't they are keeping you over night," his voice was solemn and broken as he held her.
Tears falling she spoke: "Don't leave me."
He could tell she was asking him not to leave her alon or leave her period.
"I'm here," his voice was whisper as he kissed her forehead.
"How are we going to tell Parker?" she asked her heart broken and afraid of breaking Parker's too.
"We will think of something." His voice steady and con fident.
"Or...we could try to get pregnant soon," her voice was miniature, miniscule as she spoke.
"We could," he grinned as his hands roamed her back.
They couple remaind in a state of semi-silence as the doctors came in and out giving her medicines and running tests to determine if any reproductive damage had been done. When the bleeding ceased the nurse brought her a change of gowns. Booth helped her up and into the gown. She seemed so fragile, so broken.
"You know I love you," his voice soft and as welcoming as his embrace.
"I know...I love you too."
"It will be okay."
"No it won't. But I'm not giving up on a child. Not on us, I won't give up," she vowed tears staining her cheek.
"Good because I'm not letting you go."
She laid down silently on the bed. Once she fell asleep he moved to the edge of her bed. He wrapped his muscular arms around her waist and pulled her tight to him. She moaned, wrapping him around her, needing to feel the warmth of someone in her mask of lonliness. She felt empty, broken. A shell of her former self, but at least she had Booth.
"I love you," he whispered to her as he gently brushed the hair from her face. Silently, he laid a gentle kiss on her lips, lingering as his eyes met her opening eyes.
"I love you," she mumbled back, snuggling back up to him.
His hands instantly traveled to her face as he brought her head to his. The kiss was rushed and quick at first, but grew slow and passionate. Bones let out a throaty moan as his tongue slid across her lips. She could sense his eyes burning a hole in hers so she opened them. His tongue collided with hers as she sucked on it. Another moan passed through her lips. Reluctantly, Bones broke the as she turned her head and kissed his ar head in his lap. He patted her head lovingly and began running his fingers through her hair.
"I know you wanted this, but maybe it is a sign that we need to slow down," his voice was hoarse and downcast.
"No, it is not. We do not need to slow down. Booth we have been friends for years. We are way past the first few date awkwardness. There is no need for seperate bedrooms or no sex. Our friendship got us past the awkward, are they crazy stage," she explained calmly.
"Fine. I just do not want to scare you or screw this up," he replied before lightly kissing her forehead.
"You won't."
He grinned sexily and began to massage her shoulders. She moaned deeply as she adjusted herself under the pressure of his hands.
"That feels great," she all but moaned as she turned her head and kissed his arm.
"Good. Now relax and go to sleep. It will be okay I promise."
"Seeley?"
"Yes."
"Do you still want to have a child with me?"
"Of course. Why?"
"Because, when I can, I want to try. Even after everything?"
"I love you more, because of your doubts. It means you have a mind of your own. A beautiful mind."
She blushed a deep crimson and felt her muscles begin to loosen. She could feel the tension vanish, but the sadness and reality of it all begin to set in.
"Stop," Booth demanded.
"What?"
"Stop, I can see in your eyes, that your mind is running. Just don't think and act."
So, she acted. She sat bolt upright, one hand clunching her stomach, tears down her face, and leaned in and resumed their passionate kiss. Booth was shocked, but kissed her back deeply, passionately. His hands ran through her long auburn-carmel hair. She moaned deeply pressing her tongue in his mouth. He gave it a little suck as he tried to plunge his tongue just under hers. They broke apart, gasping for air.
She had lips like drugs, lips like morphine and he could not do enough or get enough of them. He loved her, and if she had been able to he would have his way with her, sleep with her right there in the hospital. But, they could not and he respected her too much to do that anyway. He told his growing arousal to go away. But, he could not stop himself or get her out of his mind. Temperance had the same problem, he was driving her mad. She was growing wet from his mere touch, and the kissing and the loving and the talk of getting pregnant again was just fuel to the fire. He had her at I love you.
She looked over at him with a grin. His arms around her waist, her head on his shoulder, and she was sold. He grinned back at her, eyeing her up and down. He could feel his erection growing, and crossed his legs to hide it from her.
"You don't have to hide it from me," she whispered sleepily, resting a toned leg over his, her fingers resting on his inner thigh.
"It is embarassing," he whispered covering up again as he untangeled his legs from hers.
"You can be yourself around me," she smiled rolling over to face him.
Booth slunk down in the hospital bed so that he was lying beside her on the edge of the bed. His arms around her waist, hers around his neck as she rested her head in the nape of his neck.
"I love this," he held her tight trying to protect her from the reality of losing her baby.
"Yeah. I wish we could be home. Still in bed, you wrapped around me. Back when things were...when I was..." tears were welling in her eyes as he held her tighter.
"It is okay. We will have a child soon. I know it isn't the same, but we can't turn back. I promise it will be fine."
"But, what if I can't get pregnant. With the past damage, and the doctor she said I might have more," her tone was concerned and fearful as she looked into his eyes.
"It won't come to it," he sounded confident.
"But, but what if..."
"If you think negatively then bad things happen," his voice was calm and steady even though his hands shook and inside he had the same fears.
"Don't lie to me Seeley. I can see the fear in your eyes."
"Fine- I'm worried, but we can't change this or go back in time. Nothing could prevent this. It is just life. We will get pregnant again," he vowed turning from her as he wiped the tesrs from his eyes. He could not let her see him like this, even if he loved her.
"Don't hide yourself from me. This is a grieving process we need to go through together," she stated and for the first time in this relationship she was using her rational mind. She was not letting herself be upset about the past or the unknown. Sure it was unhealthy and against Booth's desires, but it was how she coped.
"I'm fine babe," his voice was shaky and tearful.
"And I couldn't lie to you, Tempe. Never."
A devious look appeared in her eyes as she kissed his lips lightly.
"Really?"
"Yes."
"Then time for a little truth or dare," she grinned and he chuckled.