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The Prankster King of Konoha

Chapter 8:

The Forest of Snakes

"The test is as follows," Anko called. Her hair was smoking, parts of it still pointing straight up as she looked out over her sea of examinees. Her trench coat was in tatters, part of it still singed from the explosion that she had just barely managed to escape. "You are all going to be given a scroll, either heaven or earth. You are to find the other scroll, then make it to the tower at the very center of the forest of death."

The assembled children waited, their breaths baited as they were awaiting the rest of the instructions. When none came, a brave soul near the front spoke up.

"Any… Any other rules?" he asked. Anko turned her eye on him, and he immediately stiffened under the ambient bloodlust.

Anko, sensing this disturbance, immediately tried to reign it in. It wasn't something she was used to doing, but the Hokage would probably be upset with her if she hadn't. Besides, it wasn't any of these children's fault that she was angry.

"Yeah," she began. Her words came out strangled through clenched teeth. "Don't open either scrolls unless you have both of them and are in the tower. Oh, and don't die. Speaking of which…"

She reached into her bosom, still somehow covered by her tattered coat, and pulled out some forms. She looked at them, wincing as if they were some sort of plague, before brandishing them.

"These are the forms that you need to sign in order to compete in this part. It basically absolves Konoha from any responsibilities in the event of your death, or something."

The woman herself looked largely uninterested. The competitors, however, seemed alarmed.

"Wait," another concerned examinee called. "Does this mean that we can die on this part of the exam?"

Anko turned to that examinee. Then, slowly, like a snake slithering lazily across the desert sands, a smile spread from one side of her face to the other.

"Why, of course!" the sadistic woman said. Her voice was lilting and slow. "When you grow up to be real ninjas, death will be the closest partner you have. Closer than your most trusted friend. Closer than your most precious lover. These exams are meant to test you for the real world, and in the real world you can die. Does that answer your question?"

The examinee that asked, a mousy young kunoichi with still chubby cheeks, seemed to shrink back into her oversized coat. She squeaked out an answer, but it wasn't something that anyone could hear.

Anko turned back to the crowd of examinees. She saw that most of them looked to be feeling much more apprehensive than they were feeling a few minutes ago.

All of them, of course, except one.

"Ne, ne," asked the blonde demon. "Are there no other rules?"

Anko turned to the boy that had at some point became both her greatest friend and greatest enemy. She scowled at his Cheshire grin, then scowled harder at his two teammates. The boyaaa seemed normal enough. He was trying his best to edge away from his other two teammates, signaling that there was still sanity left in him.

That was boring, but it was still an easier time for her.

The girl, however, seemed a problem. Anko could sense the blonde demon's influence on her, and the way she twitched and fingered the bag at her hip suggested nothing good.

"No," she said. "Of course, murder is allowed, but that does not suggest that it should be your first option. We would rather have as little to clean up as possible."

The examinees seemed perturbed by this information, but they stepped forward to collect their entrance forms regardless. The blonde demon, however…

He just smiled.

Anko decided that she was going to drink today.

XxX

The trees were a blur as they sped through the entrance gate. Sasuke, ever the cautious ninja, had his Sharingan active immediately. Red eyes flitted over the world, taking note of every falling leaf, every twitching branch, hoping to be spot anything of note.

When nothing appeared, Sasuke's first instinct was to become even more paranoid. Not finding any aggressors in a forest full of people that you knew were out to get you was more of a bad sign than good. He looked to Sakura, trying to gauge her reaction. Her face was pensive, eyes furrowed and lips set into a thin line.

Good. So he wasn't the only one feeling nervous.

He turned to the front, where Naruto was leading, and frowned. The boy seemed oddly adamant about taking point today. Sasuke, unable to explain this enthusiasm, let him. The sudden need was curious, however. The prankster usually took a back seat when it came to team dynamics. After about five minutes of constant running, where the boy took constant and sudden left or right turns, Sasuke felt a burning need to ask.

"Hey, idiot," Sasuke called. There was no heat in the insult, and sure enough Naruto had simply inclined his head. Sure that he had the prankster's attention, he continued. "Why are you suddenly so worried about leading us? Is there something going on?"

The blonde didn't say anything at first. He looked back, and for a second blue eyes met scarlet ones. The whiskers on his face twitched, something that was easily seen by Sasuke's Sharingan, and it wasn't long before Naruto's signature smirk was back.

"Oh, no reason, really. It's just that I may have been in here earlier this week and I may have not disabled all of the traps that I left behind." The boy then scratched the back of his head. His grin turned sheepish as he turned into another sharp left turn. Sasuke, too used to the boy's antics, wasted no time in following. "The guy I was fighting wasn't exactly… gentle. Nothing short of my best could have done what I needed. Normally, this wouldn't be so bad, but even my more dangerous traps would have slid right off the bastard! So my remaining traps might be a little… lethal."

Sasuke could feel the blood drain from his face. He was already quite pale, so for Naruto to make him even paler was something.

"How… lethal… are we talking?" Sakura asked. Her voice quivered as she talked.

"Well…" Naruto started, his voice trailed off. "Lethal enough that the exam proctors wouldn't come in to remove them without life insurance. They tried to call me in to remove them but I was… predisposed…"

XxX

Three Days Ago

Gaara sat strapped to a metal chair. The ropes binding him were inscribed with odd symbols that he hadn't seen before, and all of them glowed with a bright, burning blue. He tried to struggle, he did, but his chakra simply wouldn't listen to his commands. He tried to call on his mother for help, but she was incapacitated as well. The echoing laughter of a deep, malicious voice rang in his head as she was restrained by the fox. He was sure that they weren't doing anything untoward, but there was no way he could go to check.

In front of him stood a boy, clad in only blue shorts and a disgustingly orange shirt. In his hands were two boxes, neither of which were ones he had ever seen before.

"Okay, Gaara," the blonde demon said. "I don't usually get guests, so I'm going to enjoy the time I have with you while I can. I have popcorn in the microwave and enough juice to keep us on a sugar high for days to come. The Hokage is probably going to come looking for you, but he won't arrive until after he sees the ANBU fail. That gives us at least eight hours before he decides that enough is enough and he's tired of the inadequacy of his Special Forces."

Gaara, unable to do anything else, glared at his counterpart. He wanted to curseaw or scream, but there was a frog shaped gag in his mouth.

Why the boy had it, Gaara would never know.

"Eight hours is just enough time to watch both of these movies," he held up both boxes, and Gaara was finally able to read what was on them. One said 'Ultimate Ninja Storm' while the other said 'Kyouko and the Valley of Snow'.

Gaara, unbeknownst to any of his siblings, was a huge cinephile. He had to do something while staying up all night, unable to sleep. As such a cinephile, however, he knew exactly how horrible both movies were. They were direct to DVD adaptations of video games and, while he had no opinions on the games themselves, he knew that both live-action videos were awful.

"I have already seen them, of course," Naruto continued, a horribly misplaced smile on his face. To Gaara's dawning horror, he realized that the boy was actually proud to have owned the two horrific films. "But I wouldn't mind seeing them with you again. As the guest, however, you get the right to choose which one we watch first."

Gaara shook his head wildly, hoping beyond hope that the boy was joking. 'Let's watch anything else!' the redhead pleaded. Unfortunately, the plea fell on two deaf ears.

"No," Naruto said. "I insist. I've already watched them millions of times. What's another? If the ANBU take too long, we might even get to watch one twice!"

Naruto's smile split his face, but Gaara found that he couldn't match the energy. He had barely managed to sit through even one of those films, and he couldn't recall finishing the other. He shook his head once more, but Naruto brushed off his wishes.

"Can't decide, huh?" the blonde demon asked. "Yeah, I wouldn't be able to either. Don't worry, though, little brother! Your big bro will choose for you!"

Naruto popped 'Ultimate Ninja Storm' into the DVD player, then picked up Gaara's chair and moved him to be in front of the couch. A jingle played, one that was similar to the games', before showing the first two main characters.

They looked nothing like the source material. Their voices were too high pitched and their actions were far overplayed. Gaara felt secondhand embarrassment just from watching them on the screen. Judging by the pained expressions on the men's faces, the actors weren't enjoying themselves either.

The couch groaned as Naruto returned. Gaara hadn't seen him leave, too horrified by the horrendous acting that he was being forced to sit through. The boy had a bowl of popcorn in his hands as he watched, enraptured, by the screen.

"You know, movie theaters don't let me in too often, and DVDs don't' circulate Konoha too much either. This is actually one of the few movies that I'm actually allowed to see."

Suddenly a lot of things made sense.

"For some reason, no one ever wants to watch it with me," Naruto continued. His voice took on a somber tone, but it wasn't long before his energy returned. "Even the Fox retreats in my mind whenever I start it up. But now, I have you! And I know that you're going to enjoy it with me!"

Gaara's eyes turned back to the screen, and he was rewarded with a fiercely overdramatic portrayal of a man being stabbed. The actor spun several times, something that shouldn't happen when you were stabbed in the gut, before all but flopping on the ground.

This was only the first five minutes.

"And Gaara!" the blonde demon called. "Want to hear something? It's the best part! This is the director's cut! We're going to get to see all of the deleted scenes as well!"

Gaara groaned, no longer able to contain his horror. The movie was bad enough, but now he was being told that there were scenes that didn't make the cut?

Gaara, already mentally broken, found himself quickly retreating to his happy place, when a knock on the door broke him from his trance. The movie was already around its mid-point, showing exactly how long he was out of it.

Still, there was someone here. Judging from Naruto's sudden bout of nervousness, it was likely the ANBU that he was being told about. The demon, suddenly serious, rose from his place on the couch. His index finger trailed along a thin piece of string that Gaara could swear was not running through the center of the boy's living room a few minutes ago. Testing its strength, the blonde menace nodded, apparently satisfied with what he saw, before making his way over to the door.

Staying true to his tendency to do the exact opposite of what you expect, the boy threw his door open. Placing his hands on his hips, he stared down the two masked men that were standing in his doorway.

"What do you two want?" Naruto asked. His voice was impetuous and haughty, two things that he definitely should not have been. "I'm in the middle of something!"

The two ninja, ANBU from the looks of it, nodded. One made to enter the room, but the other one stopped him short.

"Never enter a room that Naruto has recently entered," the man said, his words coming out as if those of a sage. "Give his traps some time to go dormant."

"But… what if he's still in the room?" the younger ANBU asked.

"Then you don't enter," the man responded simply. He pushed his younger recruit back, before fixing his eyes on Naruto once more. "Listen, brat, the old man sent us here to get something from you. He said that you booby trapped the entire Forest of Death and you need to come to…"

He then trailed off. His mask moved, and Gaara could feel the man's eyes on him. The feeling soon passed, however, and it wasn't long before Gaara realized that, although the man's gaze was directed towards him, it wasn't actually him that he was looking at.

No, the ANBU with the bear mask was looking at something beyond him. Something much worse and far more sinister.

No, Gaara thought. No, no, no! The man couldn't run now! He had to save him!

"Mmmmfl!" the poor boy shouted, though the gag in his mouth prevented him from doing so. Still, he tried his hardest to get his muffled cries to reach the two men.

It was to no avail.

"Ah, I see that you're busy, Mr. Uzumaki," the older ANBU said. Gaara couldn't see his eyes, but he knew that the man hadn't stopped staring at the film in abject horror. "We… we should leave you to it."

The younger one made to object, but a hand placed itself on the boy's shoulder. The two were then gone before he could get a single word out. Naruto, apparently already used to their antics, simply shrugged. He walked back over to the couch and flopped down on it.

"That was weird," the blonde menace said. He returned the bowl of popcorn to its place on his lap. "I mean, they usually give me space when I'm watching my movies, but I didn't think they would be so kind as to do it when they have a mission. I wonder at what rank the old man forces them to have good manners?"

Gaara stared at the boy, not comprehending how such a smart young ninja who was able to outsmart the power of a Tailed Beast, was thusly unable to understand that the two men had just run away.

"Oh well," Naruto said. "If they're going to let us finish our movie, then that means that we have more than enough time to do a double watch!"

Gaara screamed.

XxX

Present Day

"Anyway, I think that we should be careful. I'll let you know when it's safe to move freely again. Most of the traps should have been disabled in the fight, but there are quite a few that are still hanging around. I'm not sure which ones are working and which ones aren't, however, so I think that we should be careful."

Sasuke turned to look at Sakura. They shared a moment of knowing before turning back ahead.

Both were concerned. What monster could Naruto have been fighting that needed him to use a whole forest of lethal traps just to immobilize? The answer plagued their curiosity, but it was probably better not to ask.

The boy could be real tight lipped about his secrets. The answer would just show up in time.

XxX

When the bell rang and the second exam started, Team Ten, also known as Team Kurenai, were stopped at the very beginning. Kiba, usually brash and obnoxious, stared into the forest with a peculiar expression on his face.

"Oi, Hinata," the boy said. Gone was his usual brash and boisterous personality, replaced instead by a serious demeaner. "Activate your eyes for me. I want to see something."

Hinata, not one to argue, put her hands together into a seal. She concentrated for a second, before letting the chakra flow to her eyes. The veins around them bulged, signaling the use of her family's ability. The world sharpened for her, before expanding to show the entire world all around her. She could see through the trees and the walls, as well as see farther than she could before. She could see the chakra of all the animals and all the plant life. She could see the proctors, and even the other contestants as they raced towards some unimaginable goal.

More than all of that, however, she could see the wanton destruction hidden just underneath the topsoil. An array of contraptions, some broken and some not, lay littered throughout the forest. It wasn't hard to see which ones were still in use, as the ambient chakra had not yet left them. They laid in wait, hoping for some hapless prey to come along.

The amount of them that were primed were far less than the ones that were disabled, but that didn't comfort Hinata any. There were a lot of traps in the forest. Even though over half of them were gone, that still left a staggering amount. Left unchecked, it wouldn't be unusual for most of the contestants to fall into danger completely by accident. And sure enough…

"Aargh!" came the scream of a young man. It echoed off the trees, bouncing into the ears of likely every other examinee. Before long, the pained scream died out, leaving a tense silence that felt more dreadful than anything.

Hinata opened her mouth to say something, but a raised hand from Kiba stopped that. A growl rose from his throat as he spoke. "Wait."

Silence. Beautiful, blessed silence for all of three seconds. Then screams echoed through the forest once more. This time, they came from every direction, and Hinata was forced to watch in horror as examinee after examinee fell into the waiting clutches of the traps.

"Kiba, I…" Hinata started, but her sentence trailed off as she watched the young ninjas be brought low. It was both horrifying and fascinating. She found herself disgusted, but also unable to look away.

"I know," Kiba said. "I can smell it. Gunpowder and flames. There are more explosives in that jungle than leaves. How… how many were taken out just now?"

Hinata hesitated. To answer truthfully would be the best option, but it was also something that felt almost wrong to say. In the end she decided to be truthful, even if it did hurt their morale. "Half. At least half of the teams that ran into the forest have been… caught."

They were much worse than caught if the screams of agony were anything to go by. Most of the ninjas were writhing on the ground, and others were unmoving while standing.

"It would be easy to go get their scrolls," Kiba started, but even he didn't seem to believe his words. Hinata shook her head, and Shino decided to finally speak up.

"I don't think that's wise. Those traps are made no less lethal by our knowledge of where they lay. Those contestants may be weaker, but they're not out. Do we want to fight them surrounded by such devious traps?"

Hinata and Kiba looked at each other then, without words, decided that such a thing wouldn't be in their best interests. The injuries of those trapped ninja wouldn't just disappear in the day or so that it took them to navigate through the maze of evil. It was a better idea not to put themselves in such unnecessary danger, and wait until the weakened competitors staggered out from the edges.

"Hinata, you take point. I'll follow right behind. We'll try to use your eyes and my nose to make it through the worst of it. Shino, we're going to need to use your bugs as lookouts and potential scouts. They can see machinations, right?"

Shino nodded, then looked towards their entrance gate. They fell into their formation without a word, before setting off.

This exam was going to be harder than they thought.

XxX

Anko propped her feet on the Hokage's desk, relishing in the way that the old man scowled. Normally she would be unnerved by his disapproval, but she felt like she was justified this time.

"So," she started. Her lips smacked as she chewed on the dango stick in her mouth. "You want to tell me why you let Naruto take the exam this year?"

The Third Hokage frowned, then rubbed at his temples. He lit his pipe using a rudimentary fire jutsu, then sat back in his chair.

"I may be the Hokage, but there are still rules in place. Did you think I could hold Naruto back from taking the exams?"

"You're the Hokage," Anko responded. "I'm sure you could bend those rules." She shifted her feet on the table, uncrossing them before crossing them again in the other direction. "In fact, I like that idea. A new "Naruto" rule that prevents the little blonde bastard from giving me a headache."

The Hokage had the good nature to laugh. It was a deep and tired thing, but one that spoke of years of mirth that was tempered by hardship.

"That sounds pretty good," he said. "If I do make it, however, I would have to name it after you. Are you sure you want to shoulder that responsibility?"

Anko's smile had finally dropped. As much as she liked to joke about caging him, Anko was well aware of how much the little brat enjoyed his freedom. To take it away from him would spark him to new levels of rebellion, and she would be the nexus of his newfound rage.

Anko was a good ninja, but even she wasn't foolish enough to believe that she could survive the concentrated ire of the Prankster King. She slowly took her feet off the table, pointedly ignoring the smug grin on the face of her superior.

"You do have a point, though," he continued. "Maybe we should have kept him away. I can't imagine those traps to be anything good. Though, I do believe that the new generation has been getting lax in regards to detecting and avoiding traps. Maybe this will be good for them."

The two went silent as yet another scream came from the view on the Hokage's crystal ball. A boy cried out in pain as he gripped at his broken leg. The image hovered on him, his face contorted into a grimace, before switching to another team.

It wasn't long until they were caught too.

"Half of them have already been decimated," Anko said. "The ones that are left are either smarter, craftier, or luckier."

The Hokage nodded, then passed his hand over the ball. The image blurred, fading into fog, before clearing up and showing everyone's most troublesome prankster.

"Or," the Hokage said, his lips twisting once more into a smile. "they could be the ones to place the traps in the first place."

"You know," Anko said. "One could call this favoritism."

"Oh, please. Since when were ninja ever known for playing fair?"

XxX

Gaara watched, disinterested, as yet another hapless victim was pulled into the air. The snarl on his face was quickly replaced by surprise, then abject fear, as Gaara's sand wrapped around him like a cocoon.

"Wait… what?" the boy asked. His voice quivered as he was held aloft. His soft brown eyes met Gaara's teal, and for a moment there was silence.

Then Gaara started squeezing.

"W-wait!" he yelled. There was genuine fear there now as the boy felt his bones start to crack. Blood started to seep from his eyes as there became precious few spaces left within the Genin to remain. "I… I don't want to die!"

Death wasn't something that Gaara was unused to. He didn't much care for another life being lost by his hands. This would just be another tick scraped off his belt, and Gaara didn't think he'd feel anything for it.

"Leave him alone!" a girl yelled. Gaara turned to see another Genin, likely the boy's teammate, burst out of the forest. Gaara watched as she inched ever closer, kunai held out to puncture him. His… siblings… hopped in front to protect him, but he waved them down.

They were confused for a few seconds, but Gaara was familiar with this section of the forest. If he was correct, then in just a few more steps…

"Gah!" she screamed as she was engulfed in paint. Red and green and blue covered her body, before the sheer volume of the viscous goo sent her flying into a tree. For Gaara, it was little more than a nuisance that slowed him down and muddied his sands. It took a few seconds for him to filter through the grains, but it wasn't too big of a deal.

For the average Genin, however, it was an overwhelming obstacle. The girl was pinned to a true under the force of the slime. When she tried to move, she found herself unable to pull herself from the bark.

"What was that?" Temari, his sister asked. Gaara looked at her. Was she always so tall? "Where did that… Wait, no. Gaara, did you know that was there? Was this where you went?"

Instead of answering, Gaara turned back to the Genin in his sands. He was screaming out a name, probably the name of his likely crippled teammate. They were Rain ninja, if their headbands were anything to go by.

Gaara squeezed more. That just meant that they weren't on the list of people he couldn't kill.

The boy continued screaming until a squishy pop echoed around the forest clearing. Blood splattered across his sands and for the first time ever, he felt no joy from it.

"You're no longer influenced by my chakra, boy. This new seal is doing wonders for us."

Gaara nodded, then rubbed at the new symbols on his forehead. Instead of a word, however, it was a triangle surrounded by two concentric circles. It wasn't a seal nearly as strong as the one that held that damn fox, but it was a sight stronger than the one he had before.

"Those Sand ninja are hardy but brutish. I don't know how they expected to seal away a Biju with this. Tell you what. I'll replace it for you, but in return you have to promise never to harm a Leaf ninja again, okay? In return, you'll even get to sleep!"

The perverted old man was powerful. Even Gaara could feel as much. He wasn't planning on sticking to that promise, but there was nothing to gain from breaking it.

After all, that blond gnat was still buzzing around.

"Kurama is here as well. While this seal offers us better control, it limits our ability to do a full transformation. We're… weaker."

Gaara hissed at that, but didn't say anything. It was terrible to admit, but even a partial transformation would take everything he had. He was no longer the ace of the invasion, and as such the plan was going to be delayed.

"I don't particularly mind," Mother cooed. "I never liked that snake in the first place. His chakra was disgusting, even to me."

Gaara agreed. Now that he could think clearly, he had to wonder why his father accepted to work with that vile man at all. Even just standing in the same room as him made Gaara's hair stand on end, and the only reason Gaara even tolerated him at all was his need to keep him around in order to kill.

Now that his head was clearer, he could see that there was no way he was strong enough to do so. Even at full power, Gaara felt that the man could easily bat him aside.

"We would have been crushed if we fought him alone," Mother said. "But, perhaps, we are no longer alone."

Gaara looked at the girl still suspended in paint and frowned. The snake was definitely in the forest, but so was the gnat. Alone, he was likely unable to fight. But together…

"Come," Gaara said. His siblings both turned to him. The fear that was present in their eyes had dulled somewhat, but not as much as his bloodlust had. He waited for the day the two caught up. "We're going to do something."

He led his brother and sister away, heading straight for where he saw the gnat enter the forest. He would be able to bypass the traps with the help of his sand.

XxX

Her name was Menma. Yeah, it wasn't the prettiest of names, but it was one that was assigned to her. Her official designation was Root Agent Z-0142 and, until a short while ago, she did not exist.

"Menma!" her teammate called. He was not a Root agent. Neither was she, anymore, she supposed, but being a part of the program had to have accounted for something. "Get over here!"

Not one to ignore orders, Menma made her way over to her teammate. His name was Origumo, and he was civilian born. His chakra reserves were pitifully low, and if he were in Root he wouldn't have been used for anything more than fodder. Still, he talked the loudest during their first team meeting, so their Jonin sensei had arbitrarily designated him as the leader.

Their other teammate, who was pitifully caught in the bear trap, wasn't the kind to argue, so the boy was made the team leader. Stubborn and impatient, Origumo ignored her warnings about the traps in the forest. He forged ahead and didn't bother to check the ground until Other Teammate all but pushed him out the way.

Menma didn't see the use in that, personally. Such things were trivial. Both of them were useless, meaning that their loss was about the same. What meaning was there in preferring one broken leg over another?

"Menma!" Origumo shouted. His hands were clutching uselessly at Other Teammate's leg. It was bleeding profusely, and there was a good chance that he wouldn't be able to continue the mission. Such an action, therefore, was entirely useless, as it wouldn't help with the internal bleeding. Origumo probably knew that, however. It was probably some human thing that she couldn't understand. "Call for help! Esui is down!"

Menma looked to Other Teammate. They were on their back on the ground. To say that they were "down" was a correct assessment, though quite an obvious one.

"We're out on a mission," she said. "There is no help out here."

Origumo growled, his teeth showing as he all but snarled at her. "We don't have time for your bullshit, Menma! Esui is dying! I need you to go get help!"

Such a thing would go against the mission parameter. It was an unwise choice of action. She said as much.

"Mission? This is a stupid exam. We can try again next year! Esui is dying!"

"People die on missions all the time. I don't see how this is any different."

Origumo glared at her. His teeth grinded against each other in a manner that told Menma that he was angry. She couldn't figure out why, though.

"You are upset," she said. It wasn't a question. She knew that he was.

"Of course I am! Our teammate is dying and you're… You're just standing there! You're just being you! That's always the problem! You're being your usual, weird, stupid self!"

Menma tilted her head. She was confused. "You told me that you hated her."

Origumo sputtered. His hand eased on Other Teammate's wound, and he didn't reapply the pressure until the blood started to flow once more.

"I… I don't like Esui, but I don't want him to die! What the hell is wrong with you?"

Menma shrugged. Many things were probably wrong with her. She was told as such when Root disbanded. She was told again when they were trying to reassign her back into the normal ninja corps. There were many things that didn't make sense about her, but there was one thing that she was sure of.

You cared about the people that you liked, and you didn't care about the people that you didn't. That was common sense. In this regard, Origumo was the one in the wrong.

"Shoot the emergency flare," he said. He was sobbing now, his eyes trained on the still bleeding wound. This was the work of the Prankster King, alright. Had it been a normal trap, she would have detected it long before Other Teammate had time to get himself caught in it. The Prankster King, however, had an uncanny ability to hide his machinations from even the most well-trained of ninjas.

Secretly, a small part of her admired him for it.

"If we shoot that flare, we fail the mission," she said, focusing once more on her teammates. "Failure is the worst fate."

"I don't care," Origumo spat. "Either you shoot that damn flare, or I'll come take it from you and shoot it myself!"

Menma doubted his words—he hadn't managed to beat her in a spar once, and that fact was unlikely to have changed in the week or so since the last time he tried. Still, this seemed to be something that Origumo cared about, as illogical as it was. Her rehabilitation leader told her that caring about the feelings of others was important.

She fished the flare from her pack and placed her finger over the trigger. Pointing it straight at the sky, she allowed the red smoke to shoot into the air. Not seconds later did other flares soon join, and it didn't take long for her to realize that her team wasn't the only ones to fall prey to the Prankster King.

"Naruto-senpai has been busy," she whispered, once more in awe of the boy. Life in Root tended to be much of the same, and even she had to admit to the monotony of it all. In all her life, however, there were two moments of interest:

"So, I take it that you're willing to be in our program? I must warn you; the training is very tough."

"I'm far tougher."

"I think that'll be the first thing I train out of you once you become mine."

"I'll never be yours, Danzo. I'll never belong to anyone."

Menma smiled. Both times that Danzo dared to reach for the immutable sun that was Naruto Uzumaki. Both times the old war hawk had failed. Both times she had seen color in a world that had none. The first time the boy had escaped, she wasn't there. Danzo was unaware of the boy's machinations then. Naruto was but an eight-year-old, after all. His pranks thus far had been rudimentary and childish.

The stories of that escape kept Menma up at night. She wondered how it felt. The hours allotted to her for sleep were instead spent wondering what it was like to be in his shoes. To be the one that Master Danzo looked to with such shock and rage. Was that feeling amazing? She could imagine so. To be the one with power, uncontainable and absolute. She dreamed of it. She thought about it during times of relaxation, and she thought about it when things got difficult.

She thought about it when her emotional conditioning began. The hazing was effective and efficient. It didn't strip her of emotions, but rather eroded at them. It was a process so gradual and steady that she hadn't even realized how much she had changed until the brand was on her tongue.

She hadn't even thought about the pain. She was just following orders. Master Danzo said that she was to be branded, and so she opened her mouth obediently.

Throughout it all, though, Naruto had never left her mind. When his second prank finally descended on them and disbanded Root, she was the first to sign up for reconditioning. She grabbed at the Hokage's robes, hacking and coughing from the gas, and begged to be a part of the world that her senpai was in.

And now, mere months later, she was finally here. Naruto was in the same exam as her, and he was even in the same Training Grounds.

She had to go see him.

"Where are you going?" Origumo asked. His voice quivered as he spoke. Menma looked at him. "We have to wait for the rescue team!"

Wait? That wasn't in the rules. They may have been a unit, but she wasn't beholden to them. Taking a second to fasten the belt holding her kunai pouch to her leg, she turned towards where she sensed the ever so familiar chakra.

Naruto was that way. She would be there to help him this time. With all the chaos he was likely to need assistance.

Especially with that snake running around.

XxX

"Brat," Kurama snarled. His voice echoed in Naruto's head like a roar in a cavern. Naruto, who was tending to a trap just barely away from where they were taking a break, looked up from where he was working.

There was no need to look up, he just felt the urge.

"What, fox?" Naruto asked. He didn't much enjoy being bothered while he was working on traps. Some of them weren't spent in his fight against Gaara, but they still ended up getting disarmed. Resetting them wasn't necessary, but it would be fun to thin the herd. Judging from the screams echoing from near the edges, he had already started to do so.

"I sense something."

Naruto stopped, his deft fingers going eerily still. His blue eyes focused, thinning to the size of a pea as he thought about the fox's words.

Kurama sensed things often. That was his thing. Emotional pings were often and varied, so he usually kept that particular ability away from Naruto so as not to overwhelm him. Still, the ability was constantly on for the fox, so he typically ignored most of the people he sensed.

For him to point out someone meant that something was extraordinarily wrong.

"Who is it?" Naruto asked. "What is it?"

The fox grumbled, as if he were mulling over the decision to tell him. After a few seconds he relented. "I… want you to promise not to be angry."

Whoa, red flag. For the fox to be so reticent was damning. The malevolent spirit didn't deign to hide its opinion even when he knew it would cause conflict. This must be serious.

"I'm only going to get madder the more you prolong this. Tell me." Naruto stood. He wiped off his pants and turned to his team. They were refilling their canteens at a nearby river.

Should send them away?

"It wouldn't matter. This enemy is likely after them as well."

"Then who is it?" Naruto all but snarled. He hated when the Fox pulled this cryptic bullshit. Silence reigned for a bit, during which time Sakura had looked up from what she was doing. She saw Naruto staring and, in a rare bout of camaraderie, waved at him.

Naruto raised his hand to wave back.

Then a tornado tore through the forest.