It was a nice summer night... Who am I trying to fool - it was like the night of Armageddon and the gates of hell has decided to open up in this mansion. It was so hot that you could fry some eggs on a pavement without forgetting to flip them over or they might burn into coil. And you might think that a big old house would be perfectly cool inside. YOU ARE WRONG.

I was in my room, dressed in swimming suit, tank top and short skirt. Why swimming suit, you might ask? One word, four letters - Shuu. All windows were opened. I was laying on the floor slowly traveling from one spot to the other searching for a colder part of the floor in a snowflake pose enjoying my new founded territory, when someone barged into my room.

"I'm so thirsty."

"Honestly same."

"Where are you, damn it?"

"Down here."

"The hell are you... Oh fuck it I'm too thirsty for your nonsense." Subaru then proceeded to lay down with me, or should I say, on me and reach out for my neck, but I stopped him.

"It's no wonder that you are so thirsty. I'm dressed like that, laying on the floor like that, it's only natural for you to feel this way after seeing me." Suddenly, is face was in front of mine, eyes were screaming 'DESTROY, MURDER, CRUSH THE WALL-CHAN!'

"I'm kidding, just kidding," I laughed nervously while sitting up.

"You are thirsty because you are too hot. I mean look at yourself." I had a plan and I needed him to strip.

"What does it have to do with m-my looks?" Was that a blush? Did he get shy?

"You are dressed way too much. At least remove this black jacket," I said while pulling it down his shoulders.

"THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!" Now he was a standing blushing mess. "Helping you (me) to cool down. Now, take it off and you will see that this way you won't feel as hot as you are feeling now." Bullcrap, but hoped he would buy it.

"Tck, if you say so," he said while taking off his jacket.

"Now come and drink my blood," I said in a lustful voice.

"Don't tell me what to do. I'll drink it not because you said so, but because I'm thirsty." Yes, come closer my cold blooded Tsunbaru.

He was so close to me, I could already feel his cold breath on my neck.

"Damn it you are hot," he whispered. I hugged him and pressed my body against his pale cold skin, enjoying it to the fullest.

"Your skin feels so nice against mine, I want more," I whispered, already feeling the heat in my body being destroyed by Subaru. But I could swear that I heard a "Nfu~" somewhere, though I didn't care. As long as I had the least perverted Sakamaki as my cooling pad I didn't care about anything.

"I will ignore that," He hissed out while getting ready to sink his fangs my neck.

"Good choice," I whispered. I closed my eyes waiting for the pain to come, but instead...

"Ouch!" I opened my eyes. He jumped up, one hand on his neck, frantically looking around.

"What's wrong Subar..."

*BZZZZ*

Don't tell me... He was bitten by a mosquito. A vampire. Bitten. By. An. Fucking. MOSQUITO?! I didn't know the exact moment when I was, again, on the floor, laughing so hard that I had to cross my legs in order to keep everything inside.

"I WILL MURDER YOU, YOU SON OF A BITCH!"

"HAAAA?! WHAT DID ORE-SAMA DO TO YOU?!" Screamed voice from the kitchen.

I stopped rolling around, raised my head, took a quick glance at Subaru and after a moment I was back to hysterically laughing my ass off again.

He ignored me while trying to smash that mosquito. Poor thing decided to land on the wall.

*CRASH*

My wall. My poor little wall with new founded ventilation hole.

"He he, short life, you little sucker," Subaru said it with such a prideful voice. He turned around to face me, when...

"THE HELL!" The very same hand was on the very same spot on the very same neck of a very same but hella pissed Subaru. When he removed his palm from it's now usual spot, I could see two bite marks. They looked just like vampire's bite. Oh god my belly won't handle this.

Subaru was running around my room, smashing my poor wall-chan, but mosquito proved to be a worthy enemy and dodged every single hit. Now Subaru did not let his guard down. He was like a wild animal. Eyes were fixed on his pray and sworn enemy - The Mosquito. And I was Subaru's great assistant - I kept the floor covered with my rolling body that was already in a near convulsive state because of the laughter.

*CRASH* *SMASH* *CRASH*

My walls looked like a sky full of stars... Huge fist size stars.

Subaru was panting, mosquito was flying and I was dying. But Subaru's eyes said that this fight was far from over. Mosquito was visibly tired. It was flying towards my room door. Subaru finally decided to use his head for thinking and not smashing. He had his fist prepared as he was slowly walking behind his soon to be victim. He patiently waited for his enemy to pick out a spot to land. Finally, mosquito was about a few millimeters away from his landing spot, but Subaru couldn't wait any longer. His fist was already flying with full power.

"Could you please explain why there's so much noise in your room, miss..."

But Reiji was cut of... Or should I say knocked out by a flying fist towards his face.

*SMACK*

Poor Reiji was laying on the floor in the familiar snowflake pose, totally unconscious with the remains of a dead mosquito on his forehead.

Subaru just stood there, examining his fist. It had some Subaru's blood, indicating that the mosquito was dead. He had a creepy smirk on his face as if he was holding a napkin with Kaneki Ken's blood. But then he remembered that his fist collided with something softer that wood.

Once again, poor Reiji. His glasses were laying a few meters away from his head. One slipper still on his foot while the other was covering his slightly open mouth. Why was he still in his pajamas? Good question, but I don't know the answer.

Subaru looked at me, then I looked at him, then we both looked at Reiji.

"What a pain.." Shuu muttered as he was walking, yes, walking towards my room.

"Can't they be at least a little bit quieter in this heath.. Huh... Why is he here?" Shuu came closer to examine his fallen brother.

"This looks interesting." He was about to leave, when he noticed something else.

"This is also interesting." He saw two bodies in a strange state. They were rolling all over the floor, clutching their bellies, mouths wide open as if they were trying to breathe or laugh, tears streaming down their faces. That sweet silent laugh, when you are laughing so hard you can't even breathe.

"I was expecting something like this from her, but not from you, Subaru."

"O-OH SHU-SHUT U-UP!" Was all that Subaru could let out.

"Reiji will get mad at you because of this," Shuu reminded. I was wiping away tears.

"Yeah, and why do you care?"

"Your screams of agony not caused by me are equal to my loss of sleep. Now shut up, I want to sleep." He walked towards my bed. Usually, I'd be screaming bloody murder at him, but now he was like a huge package of ice to me. I won't have to suffer this heat while sleeping. But he was right.

"Hey, Rocky, what do we do about this one?"

"Rocky?" He asked, while trying to stand up from the abs workout we just went through.

"Forget it," I mumbled, "Reiji. What do we do with Reiji?"

"I don't know."

"Let's just carry him back into his room."

"I guess I will have to do all the carrying?" Asked Subaru.

"That's right, you were the one that took away his ability to walk, you will be the one to bring it back... In a way."

Subaru threw Reiji over his shoulder, I picked up Reiji's slippers and glasses. When we walked into his room, Subaru laid Reiji down into his bead. I cleaned his forehead, trying not to go into another fit of laughter. When everything was done, we went to the kitchen. I wanted some ice-cream and Subaru wanted something to drink.

I opened the freezer just to find nothing. No ice-cream no nothing. No. No no NO! THAT LITTLE PURPLE HAIRED TEDDY OBSESSED LOLI MANIAC! I won't forgive him. NEVER!