A/N: you'll notice most (if not all) of Harry's songs will be by Three days grace. song for this chapter Three Days Grace--Pain, Fudge is still here, because he never denied that Voldemort was back, it was on his insistence that Dumbledore agreed to start the training.

Disclaimer: Don't own this, J.K.R. and SM do.

School

the principal had given harry a mountain of paper work to do, so now he sat in front of a desk while he wrote down his course plan for the year. He was filling the papers in quite frankly at this point, especially his 'hopes' for the subject, what kind question is that?

I hope to teach my students how to play at least one instrument correctly and have them competently read musical notes.

It should have been at least a paragraph, but Harry thought that would be a waste of paper and ink. Harry moved on to the next paper, which happened to a list of the students who have music as an elective, their year and their past grades, as well as a pile of papers with squares on them.

I have to put seating arrangements? Harry thought, exasperated.

Harry dropped his pen and let his head fall to the desktop, He had finally finished filling in the impossibly high mountain of papers.

did Hogwarts teachers do this much too? If so, then I kind of understand why Snape was always in a fowl mood. Harry mused, as he headed to the kitchen for a snack.

Harry rummaged through his cupboards for something to wake him up, He found a box of fruit loops and poured it into a bowl with milk, grabbed a spoon and carried his food to his studio. He placed the bowl on the seat for the piano as he sat himself down on the White carpet of his studio and with flick of his wand, the instruments started playing on their own. Harry closed his eyes for a moment, flashes of his usual nightmares ran through his head, He sighed and started eating his cereal.

Harry's Life was never easy, it probably never will be. He's been betrayed and hurt so much, yet he can still trust; He's seen enough to drive a man insane, yet he isn't. Harry had the worst and best luck anyone can hope for, He'd get into life threatening positions that should impossible to escape,and escape safely, but over the Years of being tricked and betrayed, Harry had learned his lesson.

Don't Trust so easily, looks can be deceiving. Watch your Back, front, sides, and above and below, you never know if someones out to get you.

Moody's words rang in his head. Watch your back, potter, don't trust every decent looking person you see. Moody always said something like that to him when they saw each other, He was probably one of the few who were on his side in the 'next dark lord' affair, he was thankful for that.

A tapping noise brought him out of his Thoughts, he saw an eagle owl tapping at the window of his studio. He got up and let it in, it dropped a letter before leaving.

wasn't that Draco's owl? Harry thought, opening the letter.

Potter,

you asked me to keep you updated, so I think you should know, they've been raiding the house of anyone with any sort of connection to you, they're desperate to find you. Th idiotic Minister of ours has ordered anyone with a direct connection to you be 'interviewed' by aurors. You were an auror once, you know what that means. Lovegood's never looked worse, they took her voice, saying she didn't need it if she couldn't tell them where you were. All the aurors that were once under your command, quit when they heard of this, looks like you got a whole department loyal to you. so Fudge hired a whole new bunch of aurors, they're like his personal death eaters, Moody's in Azkaban, they charged him for saying you'd make a better minister than fudge could ever hope to be, then he attacked fudge. They got me for questioning last week, I've been better. So I want to ask can Lovegood and i come over? we really need to get away from that bumbling idiot we call a minister. Even if you say no, we're still coming, but Lovegood insists on asking you first. See you in a few minutes after you receive this.

sincerely,

Draco Lucius Black Malfoy

Harry nearly dropped his bowl, Moody's in Azkaban? Luna lost her voice? Draco's hurt? all because of him. how could he have been so selfish? Harry fell to his knees, why would fudge go so far to hurt people for his location? Why would he make aurors hurt innocent people? Why can't he just leave harry? Why couldn't he just let Him be free?

Harry was hardly aware of the tears that streamed down his face, or the pain in his heart as he realized Fudge would never leave him alone, Fudge was a man obsessed, and determined to ruin his life. Now the few who stuck by him have lost their freedom, their voice, their safety and their jobs because this man couldn't leave him alone. Peoples lives were ruined for ever being friends with him. his own best friend, Draco, was hurt by that mad man.

Harry's magic swirled around him as his Anger built. The instruments sprang back to life, Harry stood, singing as he threw things across the room in anger.

Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all

Harry flung a chair violently, He hated fudge, he wished fudge would feel the pain harry was feeling now. Tears still flowing Harry continued to throw things.

You're sick of feeling down
You're not the only one
I'll take you by the hand
And I'll show you a world that you can understand
This life is filled with hurt
When happiness doesn't work
Trust me and take my hand
When the lights go out you will understand

Harry smashed a vase, He was sick of loving, sick of being left, sick of never having his love returned.

Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all
Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at al

He'd take pain over love any day, at least Pain is constant, always there at the back of your mind, Love was fickle, it came and go, and Harry had seen it go a thousand times too much. He sent a reducto at a mirror, and picked up a single rose from one of the vases he broke.

Anger and agony
Are better than misery
Trust me I've got a plan
When the lights go off you will understand

one of the thorns pricked him, he burnt the rose into ashes, blood trickling down and dripping on his white carpet.

Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough

Harry started throwing vases again, Eyes overflowing with tears.

two Blond teenagers appeared out of thin air in front of the Black Manor, they could hear music coming from inside, as well as crashing noises. they looked at each other before sprinting towards the noise.

Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all
Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing
Rather feel pain

They got inside an ran upstairs towards the noise, the amount of raw magic swirling around was causing anything within the vicinity of the room to float a few inches off the ground, including the two blonds.

I know (I know I know I know I know)
That you're wounded
You know (You know you know you know)
That I'm here to save you
You know (You know you know you know you know)
I'm always here for you
I know (I know I know I know)
That you'll thank me later

They finally got to the door, the blond male pushed it open to see Harry Potter with tears flowing down his pale face as he threw things around the room, his arms bloody from the cuts he got from flying shards of glass.

Pain, without love
Pain, can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all
Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all
Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all
Rather feel pain than nothing at all
Rather feel pain

Harry fell to his knees again, his knees bled on impact with broken glass, his head bowed down, his arms limp at his sides, tears fell silently. The two blonds carried their broken friend and healed him before letting him sleep.

the blond female gave the male a look that plainly said 'we have to do something'

the male sighed, "I know"

A/N: That was long, even without the lyrics. finally, Harry's true feelings are revealed, his pain and sadness, his weariness of love, and Fudge's determination to make his life you liked it please review, i update faster with more reviews!! The Cullens will probably enter the next chapter, or the one after that, just so you know.

-Deni, Unidentified Writing Object