Okay here's the next chapter. This one hopefully will be funny, so let's spin the wheel! (Wheel appears with a poof, I spin it; lands on Talk Show) Cool here's a new one. Okay then let's get started.
Disclaimer: I own nothing but this chapter that's coming out my warped mind, not Naruto or this story.
Talking ""
Thinking ''
Somewhere in the middle of the Hidden Leaf Village, a building stood surround by a crowd, at the front stood two males trying to keep them under control.
"Maa, maa minna-san there's no need to be so impatient you'll get to see the show soon." The first drawled, obvious who that is.
"Yes! My rival is right you shall see the show on time within the next 10 minutes, if not I will do 500 sit-ups upside down!" Really do I have to say who that is? The crowd grumbles glaring at the duo guarding door into the studio. They were a little annoyed by the Jonnin having put up with them everytime they, the Gennin, had a show for fun when they didn't have any missions planed. The Gennin got bored too easily, it wasn't like anyone in the village was complaining; they liked to watch them scream, yell, shriek, and attempt to beat the hell out of one another. And speaking screaming the crowd was sure they could hear the faint sounds of someone screaming inside.
"Where is Ino?! She is supposed to be doing my makeup!" Sakura screamed, glaring at Tenten, who trying to calm her down.
"I dunno Sakura but she better hurry and get here." The weapon welding kunoichi muttered. Sakura started hissing death threats under her breath just as Ino went sashaying by. Sakura screamed again.
"INO-PIG!" The blond stopped tossing her hair.
"What billboard brow?"
"You're supposed to do my makeup! What the hell are you doing?!" Ino sneered lightly.
"What do you think? I'm doing Sasuke's makeup." Ino sighed dreamily, "He so handsome I don't see why he needs it." Sakura stomped towards her murder in her eyes. Tenten quickly took her by the arm and dragged her off to have Shikamaru do it instead; surprisingly he was good at fixing makeup. Ino snapped out of her fantasy and continued on; now that Sakura was having her makeup fixed by Shikamaru Ino could wander around watching as the stage was set up by Naruto Kiba and Neji.
"NO Naruto I said the table goes in the middle of the circle listen damnit." Neji snapped to the blond, Naruto pouted and huffed dragging the table, Neji hissed at him, "Don't do that! Pick it up!"
"Neji it's too heavy!" Naruto griped.
"Cry me a river, now pick it up. Kiba the chairs go around the table in a half-circle, the- No damnit Kiba don't drag-" Neji threw his hands up, "I give up you two never listen to me!"
"We are listening!"
"I said don't drag any of the stuff and you do it anyway. Are you hearing what I'm saying now!"
"But Neji this stuff is too heavy to carry." Kiba snapped, Neji sneered at them.
"You two are pathetic," he snapped and turned to Ino, "Where's Choji and Lee." She shrugged.
"I think I saw Choji at the snack table eating some ramen." Naruto's eyes lit up.
"We've got some ramen here? Yes!" He ran off and Neji started rubbing his temples muttering, 'Resist urge to kill moron.' Before walking off. Ino snickered and walked to the snack table, passing Hinata and Shino, they were muttering to each other holding clipboards. Pass Tenten, she was messing with the TV monitors. Pass Shikamaru, who had Sakura by her chin holding a brush in hand brushing it lightly over Sakura's cheeks. Ino eyes met Sakura's emerald orbs and they proceed to glare each down. Shikamaru looked up, rolled his eyes, and muttered something that sounded like troublesome, picked up a little brush, and ordered Sakura to close her eyes. Sakura sent Ino one last hate filled look before letting her eyes close. Ino stuck her tongue out at Sakura and hissed, "Billboard brow." Before she was out of ear shot she heard a faint snarled, "Ino-pig." She smirked, that never got old.
She passed Sasuke, the last person on her trip, she smiled at him brightly he glared and looked away, before finally making it to the snack table, where Choji and Naruto were both inhaling some ramen. She plucked the chopsticks out Choji's hands, ignoring his wail of unhappiness, and ordered him to go to Neji, who was sitting on the floor mediating, to calm his nerves. Choji muttered, griped, and moaned about still being hungry, Ino shoved to towards Neji snapping he'll never eat again if he didn't get to work. She spent the next few minutes looking for Lee, who she found somehow entangled in some wires before sending him to work too. She watched them finally set the stage up, to Neji's relief.
"Okay now we're ready to start the show." He said brightly, "Lee tell Kakashi-sensei and Gai-sensei they can let the audience in."
"Hai!" Lee ran off to do that, Neji turned to Hinata.
"Is Sasuke and Sakura ready?"
"Ye-" "MY HAIRPIN!" Hinata jumped at Sakura's shout. Neji slapped a hand to his forehead.
"What now Sakura?"
"My hairpin is gone!" the kunoichi shrieked,
"What the hell do you need a hairpin for?" Neji exploded, "You're hair is short!"
"My bangs grew out and now it hangs in my face. I need a hairpin to hold it back." Sakura huffed, Neji rubbed his temples again.
"Sakura we're about to start the show we don't have time to find you a hairpin." Sakura growled.
"Fine, but if I start sputtering and whatnot on camera it's your fault Neji." Sakura stomped towards the stage with Sasuke trailing behind. Neji walked to a corner, sat down, and started mediating again.
Meanwhile, somewhere in the middle of the village, in the only tower in the village a blond slept with her head on her desk snoring softly.
"Tsunade-sama! The show is starting! Tsunade-sama are you awake?" The door opened and a brunette poked her head in immediately spotting the blond sleeping. She huffed, pushing the door open walking in towards the blond's side, lifting a stack of paper dropping it on the desk with a SMACK. Tsunade shot up babbling sleepily swatting at a piece of paper stuck to her cheek.
"Shizune what the hell!"
"Tsunade-sama you were sleeping instead of working again." She huffed crossing her arms, "I came to tell you that the little talk show Neji came up with is on so we could watch it. But since you were sleeping again, you didn't do the paperwork you have piling up and I think that you should finish that first." Tsunade stared in disbelief as Shizune walked out.
"And don't think about sleeping again, I'll come check on you in a few minutes." She called over her shoulder. Tsunade's head dropped on the desk and she groaned.
In another room, Shizune sat down with Tonton next to her turning the TV on with the remote.
"Konichiwa minna-san. Welcome to another show with Sasuke and me. We're very glad to be broadcasting live from within the village with a live audience to boot! Isn't this great Sasuke?"
"I guess," the Uchiha shrugged, "Anyway today's we have a special guest arriving from the Village Hidden in the Sand. The Kazekage, Gaara, and his older brother and sister, Kankuro and Temari."
"Is it a good idea to have Gaara here Sasuke?" Sakura asked, Sasuke shrugged again.
"Sure it's fine, so long Naruto and him don't try and kill each other in their stupid sparring fights." Somewhere off camera you could hear Naruto yelling, "Baka yarou teme!" the audience snickered softly, causing Sasuke to smirk. "So Sakura how about you introduce our first guest."
"Hai, Sasuke. Our first guest is another Gennin from a team that graduated from the Academy before us. So let's welcome Rock Lee to the stage." The audience happily clapped; somewhere in the background you could hear Gai screaming something about Lee to him, 'Ganbare, show you youthful spirit, and the flame of youth.' And some others things you couldn't quite catch. Lee rushed onto the stage striking a pose and crying,
"Konichiwa youthful citizens of Konoha!" Off stage Gai burst into tears causing Kakashi to sigh. Lee sat in the chair next to Sakura grinning into the camera.
"Hello Sakura-san you looking quite beautiful today!" he chirped, to her. Sakura smiled, it looked a little forced, and said,
"Thank you Lee. You look nice as well." Lee swooned, Sasuke had to reframe from rolling his eyes, seriously this guy beat him back when they were taking the Chunnin exam how? Sakura started questioning Lee about his training with Gai-sensei, while off stage things wasn't so peachy.
Neji was pretty much foaming at the mouth as he stomped around snarling, "Where is Gaara!" Everyone steered clear of him as he went by. After Lee talked, he would go on next then Tenten, and finally Gaara with his siblings. And Lee turn to talk was ending very soon; they had only 30 minutes to broadcast after all.
"Naruto I thought you said he knew the way here?" he started towards the blond looking murderous. Naruto backed up.
"I did tell him, I told him three times cause he got confused the first time around. Don't blame me just cause he's not here yet."
"Go find him."
"Wha-" Neji walked towards Naruto his face suddenly blank, and the blond paled scrambling out the door only to run into a wall of sand. The sand flew back into Gaara's gourd and the redhead blinked staring at Naruto sprawled out on the ground.
"Naruto are you okay?" he asked.
"Yeah I'm fine, hey Gaara when did you get a twin brother?" Gaara blinked slowly at that and pulled Naruto into the building by his collar with Temari and Kankuro behind snickering. Neji sighed.
"Oh thank god you're here," he muttered going to his corner to mediate. Gaara stared after him feeling more confused, Temari and Kankuro were having a hard time not trying to laugh out loud. The redhead shrugged it off and released Naruto moving to the snack table, scanned it contents, and frowned.
"Naruto." The blond shook his head trying to clear it.
"Yeah." Gaara turned to look at him, and Naruto froze remembering the time he saw such a blank expression on the redhead's face. Things did not turn out pretty.
"Where's my peanut butter cookie?" Naruto's eyes went wide. Wrong move. Gaara's eyes narrowed. "Well."
"U-um you see it was here when, I mean, the last time I saw it, it was on the table and well . . . I ate it." Gaara stared, Naruto paled again, Neji cracked his eyes open, having heard the conversation, there was a sinking feeling in his stomach and the redhead and blond stare at each other.
Then all hell broke loose.
Shizune smiled, the show was really going well, it you could block out Gai's cheering for Lee that is.
"Thank you, Lee, its sounds like being on your team is quite a thrill."
"Hai Sakura-san, you should come join us along with your team for training! It will be just as enjoyable!" Sakura's smiled looked forced again.
"Maybe one day, Lee" Lee looked ecstatic. Sasuke barely stopped himself from rolling his eyes.
"Alright then," he drawled, "Let's welcome our next guest, he's also apart of Lee's team and was-"
"WATCH OUT!" Right out of nowhere Naruto flew over the chairs, and Sasuke, Sakura, and Lee's head, rolling across the stage to a stop. Sakura was on her feet snarling, "NARUTO!" The blond rolled to a crouch and stared before tackling Sakura. Sand hit the floor causing a crater, and went after Naruto. Said person was already halfway across the stage screaming over his shoulder, 'I'm sorry I'm sorry!' Shizune blinked as the screen suddenly went to a commercial.
Back in the studio, Gaara was still trying to catch Naruto, for eating his cookie. Ignoring the blond's pleas of forgiveness, and Temari's yelling to, 'Let the cookie go!' made quite a mess trying to pin the blond down. Neji was beating his head against the wall crying and sobbing, "Why me, kami-sama, why me!" Gaara cornered the blond against the wall, smirking at the panicked expression on the Naruto's face as the sand closed in on him.
"Gaara I thought we were gonna be friends forever?! YOU'RE OFFING ME FOR A DAMN COOKIE!"
"Yes," the redhead said simply, "This is the end friend, for you anyway." And the sand completely enclosed Naruto. The blond shrieked.
With laughter?
Everyone blinked immediately recognizing Naruto's loud laugh, Neji stopped trying to give himself a concussion to stare, and if Gaara tickling Naruto wasn't enough, the redhead was smiling doing it too! Ino and Sakura swooned, Hinata and Tenten were a few seconds away from joining them, cause you know if Gaara smiles he's a total cutie. Temari shook her head walking to Gaara's side jabbing him in his head, any other time, head her would be rolling, but this time around Gaara just pouted.
"What Temari?"
"Will you give the guy a break?"
"He ate my cookie. He must pay the price." Temari rolled her eyes.
"Yeah sure, he has to pay the price by being tickled to death?"
"Yes," Temari stared.
"Gaara why don't you let Naruto buy you another cookie." Gaara blinked.
"I hadn't thought of that." Temari gave his head a fond pat.
"That's why I'm the smartest of the family, it comes with being a big sister." Gaara nodded absentmindedly agreeing with her, even though he had one thing in mind.
Cookies.
"Naruto will you go buy me another cookie?"
"If you stop tickling me, yes." Naruto gasped, Gaara grinned.
"Will you get it in five minutes?"
"Three and a half minutes if you stop now." Gaara's sand went back to his gourd and Naruto was gone the backdoor swaying in the wind. Everyone blinked at what just happened. Hinata started and grabbed Sasuke and Sakura pushing them on stage.
"You two get back on stage the commercial is almost over." She turned around and went to Neji's side. "Neji are you okay; you're about to go on next." Neji nodded rubbing his forehead. Hinata pushed him towards the stage, stopping short before they were on camera. "Okay you stand here and wait for Sakura to invite you on." She rushed off again yelling for everyone backstage to hush as the on air light lit up.
Shizune sighed as the last commercial finally ending and the talk show came back on. She made a funny noise staring at the demolished stage with Sasuke and Sakura sitting in the middle of it all.
"Sorry for the interruption minna-san, we had bit of a problem backstage." Sakura said, Sasuke snorted,
"Or as I like to say, 'Naruto's stupidity at its best.'" Sakura hit his arm lightly.
"Sasuke that's not nice." She scolded. Sasuke shrugged, not caring, Sakura sighed. "Anyway let's just get back to introducing our next guest. As Sasuke said before, he's apart of Lee's team and was last year's Number One Rookie in the Academy before Sasuke. He's considered to be the smartest Gennin is the village! A genius, a true prodigy!"
"Sakura will you stop praising him and just introduce him already!" Sasuke snapped, annoyed. Sakura grinned, making a flamboyant gesture, crying,
"Please welcome Neji Hyuuga!" Neji sauntered on stage smirking, brushing his hair back with a sweep of his hand sitting in the chair next to Lee, while the audience went nuts cheering loudly. And you could hear Gai yelling and cheering for Neji. Sasuke scowled at nothing while Sakura stared at Neji in admiration.
"Neji, as last year's Number One Rookie, you-" Shizune blinked as everything went dark.
Neji was on his feet shrieking into the darkness. "WHAT HAPPEN TO THE LIGHTS!"
"Sorry Neji, I think I pulled at the wrong cord."
"TENTEN WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!" Neji exploded.
"I said I'm sorry," Tenten said rolling her eyes, "Geez Neji don't make your hair curl or anything."
Rapid footsteps. A soft squeak. Followed by a yelp.
"Are you Tenten?"
"Heh heh sorry. . . OW NEJI DON'T HIT ME OW THAT HURTS STOP I'M SORRY!"
"NEJI A YOUNG MAN SHOULD NEVER HIT A LADY, ESPECIALLY THEIR TEAMMATE!" More rapid footsteps, a squeal then loud crash. Neji, distracted by the crash, loosened his grip on Tenten. She scrambled away; Neji felt his way to a wall, and upon finding it, started beating his head against it. The lights came back on and everyone stared at Gai sprawled out on top of one of the cameras. Neji took one short look, and resumed his efforts to gain a concussion.
Tsuzuku
Poor Neji ne. Trying so hard to make this show a success. (grins) Not on my watch he won't. So minna-san review for kRaZy-chan and make her happy so she can make me happy, if she's happy then I'm happy. Next time I'll do a Stuck! Chapter. Where should the Naruto crew be stuck? Let me know in your review till then later!