Immediately, Shawn leaped onto the palulukan's back and connected her queue. The woman was already moving, crashing carelessly through the forest. The palulukan surged after her, delighted to have prey to chase. We don't want to kill her, Shawn thought as firmly as she could. We do not want to kill her. She could feel the palulukan's puzzlement through the link, and repeated herself one more time. Grudgingly, the palulukan swiped the woman sideways, throwing her into the trunk of a tree. The woman slid to the ground with a groan, clutching her side.
"Do not move," Shawn ordered. "I have asked her not to kill you, but I do not know how long she will obey."
"I can't move," the woman grunted through gritted teeth. "Leg—broken."
Shawn felt a twinge of guilt before she remembered that this person had tried to kill her not five minutes before. The only problem was that she was telling the truth when she said she didn't know how long the palulukan would restrain herself. Now that she had her attacker incapacitated, what on earth was she supposed to do with her? Putting that problem aside for a moment, she decided that the next thing to do was find Ninat.
"I will return for you," Shawn told the woman.
Shawn and the palulukan ran along the ridge until they could make their way into the ravine. As they made their way back to where Ninat was likely to have landed, Shawn used both her own and the palulukan's senses to try to locate her friend. They found found her coming their way, apparently with the intention of finding her way back up to the ridge. Ninat screamed when they appeared, crouching with her ears laid flat against her head even when Shawn called out to her.
"Sha'ni, what happened?" Ninat asked, her eyes flicking nervously to the palulukan. "Are you alright?"
"Yes," Shawn said. "The one who attacked me is injured. I do not know what to do—she tried to kill me."
"Let's make sure the others are alright and then deal with her," Ninat said, regaining some of her usual aplomb.
"Alright," Shawn said, holding a hand down to Ninat. "Let us go."
Ninat looked at Shawn's hand and back at the palulukan. "I don't-"
"Come," Shawn said with a grin. "You will hurt Big Sister's feelings."
Ninat rolled her eyes and grasped Shawn's hand, swinging herself onto Big Sister's back and clutching Shawn's middle with a squeal as the palulukan wheeled and plunged into the forest. Shawn laughed and leaned forward, allowing herself a moment to enjoy the wind in her face and Big Sister's powerful body beneath her. Ninat buried her face in Shawn's neck, her death grip on Shawn's waist never slacking.
They made it back to the campsite seemingly in no time at all. Syulang and Neytiri were there, standing guard over a bound warrior. Or rather, Syulang stood while Neytiri sat propped against a tree, holding a bundle of bedding against her shoulder. Syulang jumped backward and yelped as Big Sister skidded to a stop. Neytiri twitched in surprise and then grunted in pain.
"Never," Ninat croaked after she had slithered to the ground. "Never again. Sha'ni, how can you be afraid of riding a pa'li after that?"
"It is different," Shawn insisted. "I told you."
"Are you two alright?" Syulang asked, hurrying over. "Neytiri said you were attacked, and that she thought there was more than that one there."
"We're fine," Ninat assured her.
"Who was the other one?" Syulang wanted to know. "I couldn't believe it when Neytiri hauled Rol'txon into camp. Was the other one Anurai too?"
Shawn nodded. "I do not know her name. I was never introduced to her, but I have seen her."
"But why?" Ninat wondered. "Why would they do this?"
Shawn summarized her conversation—if you wanted to call it that—with the false Anurai. Syulang and Ninat listened, their faces reflecting the shock and horror that Shawn had felt herself. Then, surprisingly, Ninat's expression turned to anger.
"She had no right," she fumed, her delicate hands balled into fists. "No right."
"People generally don't," Syulang agreed, looking confused. "Have the right to kill each other, I mean."
"I lost my whole family," Ninat continued, her voice shaking with emotion. "Everyone. My parents, my sisters—even my sisters' mates. What right does she think she has to revenge when I have sacrificed my right for the sake of peace? I hated you, Sha'ni. I would have killed you."
"What?" Shawn stepped back, feeling as if she had been physically struck. Behind her, Big Sister growled menacingly until Shawn put a calming hand on her neck.
"You don't mean that," Syulang said soothingly, reaching for Ninat's hand.
"I do," Ninat said fiercely. "If it had not been for Neytiri, I would have smothered her in her sleep."
"Ninat!" Syulang cried.
"At first," Ninat qualified, seeming to realize what she had just said. "Only at first, Sha'ni. That's the point. Neytiri made me spend time with you, to see that you were not like the others. And you're not. You are good, and kind, and without an ounce of cruelty in your whole body. You are a true sister, and I love you. If I can put aside my hate, what right do people like her have to hold onto theirs? She at least has her mate, and her son may yet get well in the hands of a less incompetent Tsahik."
Shawn said nothing and turned her face against Big Sister's shoulder. How was she supposed to lead the Anurai alongside Rai'uk if even her best friend had once hated her enough to want to kill her? How many more were like these two rogue Anurai, waiting quietly for the chance to take their revenge? All her brave words about being chosen by Eywa now rang hollow in her mind.
"The woman," Shawn said numbly. "We need to get her. Syulang, can you follow on a pa'li?"
"I don't know," Syulang said. "In fact, I doubt they're even here anymore. They'll have bolted. Sha'ni-"
"Come with me on Big Sister, then," Shawn said, and climbed onto the palulukan's back.
"Alright," Syulang said cautiously, looking anxiously between Shawn and Ninat.
They rode mostly in silence, the quiet broken only by Syulang's attempts to excuse Ninat's shocking outburst.
"I do not want to talk about it," Shawn said repeatedly, and after a while simply ignored her friend.
Shawn stopped Big Sister some distance from where she had left her attacker; the palulukan had enjoyed what she thought of as a game, but now she was beginning to get restless and Shawn wasn't sure the young predator would be able to control herself around what she would see as injured, vulnerable prey. Shawn motioned for Syulang to dismount and slid down herself. She thanked Big Sister profusely and released her from the bond. As the palulukan bounded away, Shawn found herself looking wistfully after Big Sister. The palulukan's emotions and mindset were so simple. She did not know hatred, only hunger. She did not know revenge, only the thrill of the hunt. With a sigh, Shawn turned away and led Syulang to where her attacker lay sheltered among the roots of a tree.
"You came back," the woman said, sounding stunned.
"Of course she did," Syulang sniffed, looking down at the woman with disdain. "Sha'ni is a woman of honor. Unlike you, Pamtseo,"
"Spare me your moralizing," Pamtseo snapped. "What have you done with Rol'txon?"
"He's fine," Syulang said. "He'll have a headache for a few days, that's all."
"Why do you not kill me?" Pamtseo demanded. "Has this pretender brought you here to gloat?"
Syulang rolled her eyes.
"Sha'ni brought me here to help take you back to our camp. As to killing you, well, that is Olo'eyktan's to decide. With any luck, he won't be inclined to leniency," she added nastily. To Shawn, she said, "Peyral went to fetch Rai'uk. They should be here before the sun is high."
Shawn nodded dumbly and reached for Pamtseo to help her to her feet. The other woman hissed and twisted away, groaning in pain. Shaking her head disgustedly, Syulang pulled the woman—none too gently—to her feet and placed Pamtseo's arm over her shoulder. Shawn walked wordlessly beside them, unable to bring herself to offer her help again. Syulang, tired and made uncomfortable by the tension, filled the silence with an unending stream of vitriol aimed at their charge. When they finally arrived at their camp just as night began to give way to dawn, they were all exhausted and out of sorts.
"You two rest," Ninat said after she and Syulang settled Pamtseo next to her mate. "I'll watch until dawn."
"I won't say no," Syulang said with a grimace, stretching and rubbing her neck, "but wake me if you need to. I had more sleep than you did."
"Sha'ni," Ninat said hesitantly. "Can I talk-"
"I am tired," Shawn announced, not meeting her eye. "I sleep now."
Shawn went and settled herself next to Neytiri, who smiled weakly at her.
"Rest now, sister," she said gently. "Your problems will still be here when you wake."
"So much hate," Shawn whispered. "How can I be Na'vi? Even Ninat..."
"Oh, Sha'ni," Neytiri said, reaching out to touch Shawn's hair with her good hand. "Ninat doesn't hate you. She never did. She didn't know you, so how could she hate you? She hated what she thought you represented. Never you."
"How many more like Pamtseo?" Shawn wondered sadly. "Will I ever truly be one of you?"
Neytiri was silent for a moment. "There probably are many like Pamtseo. You will have to show them, help them, like you did for Ninat. It isn't an easy task that Eywa has laid on you, Sha'ni, but I know you are strong enough to carry it out."
"I am not so sure," Shawn whispered.
"Well, we are," Neytiri said firmly. "Sleep now. You will feel better in the morning, I promise."
"You will not," Shawn observed, eying Neytiri's arm.
Neytiri smiled ruefully. "You're probably right."
With a sigh, Neytiri leaned her head back against the tree and began to hum softly with her eyes closed. Shawn closed her eyes as well and let herself be soothed by the gentle tune. Gradually the ache in her chest eased as she drifted closer and closer to sleep. She hoped Neytiri was right. She hoped Rai'uk would be there when she woke.
Her wish was granted. She woke to the sound of ikrans shrieking in the canopy. She recognized the cry of Takuk, Rai'uk's ikran, immediately. She scrambled to her feet, and the shroud of misery that had clung to her even in sleep began to lift. When Rai'uk materialized as if from no where, Shawn wanted nothing more than to run into his arms and weep, but she did not. Instinctively, she knew that how she handled this situation would irrevocably color her clan's perception of her and her ability to lead.
"I See You, ma' Rai'uk," she said, trying to exude calm competence. She could tell, however, that Rai'uk saw the way her hand trembled as she made her gesture of greeting. Hopefully no one else could.
"I See you, ma' Shani," he replied gravely, and grasped her by the shoulders. In a low voice, he asked, "Are you well?"
"No," she whispered. "But I am unharmed. Peyral told you what happened?"
"Some," he said. "Only that Rol'txon attacked you and that Neytiri was hurt."
Quickly, she summarized the night's events, leaving out Ninat's distressing revelation and trying to downplay the depth of Pamtseo's hatred. Even the bare essentials, however, painted an ugly picture; by the time she finished, Rai'uk looked angrier than she'd ever seen him. He had a deadly stillness about him, and his eyes promised a world of pain for Pamtseo and her mate.
"Where are they?" he asked when Shawn fell silent.
"There," Shawn said, gesturing helplessly. "Rai'uk—what will you do?"
"What must be done," he said grimly.
"You will kill them?" Shawn gasped. She had thought Syulang was simply being mean.
"Yes," Rai'uk said. "Such...such blasphemy cannot be tolerated, Sha'ni."
"But-"
"You have a bigger spirit than I, yawne, to forgive so easily," he said with a bleak smile. "They would have killed you...would kill you still, given the chance. But this is how it has always been. We can expect to die in battle, or on the hunt, but within the clan no one must ever fear death at a brother's hand. It cannot be allowed to go unpunished."
"But...the angry tsahik—it was her," Shawn protested, trying to find the words. "She twisted their minds—lied to them. It is not their fault."
"Not their fault!" Rai'uk cried in astonishment. "They tried to kill you, Sha'ni! They nearly killed Neytiri."
"Yes," Shawn agreed, her expression clearing abruptly. "They nearly killed Neytiri. You must speak with Toruk Makto first. It is his decision, too."
"I have already sent for him, and I know he will agree with me," Rai'uk warned her. "It is not malice or vengeance, small one. It is necessary. Toruk Makto is a warrior; he knows this."
"Perhaps," Shawn said, the wheels in her head turning.
It wasn't—just—her soft, first-world sensibilities. The idea of executing her would-be murderers struck a jarring chord in her soul. It felt wrong in a way she could not articulate, and she knew that the path her clan traveled would be determined by this decision. She needed to make them understand, but for that she needed Mo'at—and Jake.
"Promise you will do nothing until Toruk Makto arrives," Shawn demanded.
"As you say, Toruk Makto must speak," Rai'uk agreed. "But prepare yourself, yawne...I think you will not like what he has to say."
"We will see," Shawn replied with a determined smile.
Rai'uk, apparently willing to let it go for the time being, went off to help organize the construction of a more comfortable, semi-permanent camp. Mo'at, apparently, was on her way, traveling as quickly as she could by pa'li. As there was nothing she could do to change Rai'uk's mind in the meantime, Shawn got to work gathering food for the evening meal as well as some pain-killing herbs Neytiri was too proud to ask for. She was nearly ready to return to camp when Ninat appeared in her path with an unsettling abruptness Shawn had yet to master.
"Sha'ni," Ninat begged. "Please, can we talk?"
Shawn sighed and set down her make-shift basket. "There is no need, sister."
"There is," Ninat insisted. "You must know-"
"Truly, Ninat," Shawn said earnestly. "I was—it hurt. But...I understand. And I forgive you...of course I forgive you. You forgave me—and my people."
"You shouldn't have to," Ninat said fiercely. "You should not have to hear—and forgive—such words. I'm so sorry, Sha'ni.."
"Neytiri said I must show others like I showed you," Shawn said, looking down. "It will be hard...but I know it can be done, because of you."
"If anyone can do it, Sha'ni, it is you," Ninat said with a smile.
"Is everything alright, then?" Syulang asked, stepping out from behind the bush where she had clearly been eavesdropping.
"Why, Syulang, please join us," Ninat said, rolling her eyes, but she was smiling. "Yes, everything's fine."
"Good," Syulang said succinctly. "That was awful. Let's never fight again."
"We can try," Ninat said drily.
Shawn returned to camp in considerably better spirits and contributed her share of the food to those managing the cooking fire. Despite the several hours' sleep she'd gotten that morning, all she wanted was to find someplace secluded to share tsaheylu and go to sleep with her mate. Unfortunately, her chances of slipping away unnoticed where depressingly slim. Everyone wanted to know what had happened, and Ninat, Neytiri, and Shawn were all called upon to tell the story. Syulang bowed out, explaining that she'd been asleep for most of it, and Peyral had apparently gone with some others to bring the Omaticaya.
"Make it good," Syulang whispered to her as Neytiri began with how Rol'txon had attacked them. "Don't leave anything out...I know you want to save them."
"But everyone will be so angry," Shawn whispered back, surprised. "How will that help?"
"Trust me," Syulang said, shaking her head. "Your only hope is to make them look more crazy than evil...which shouldn't be too hard."
"I thought you would want them to die," Shawn murmured.
"They'd deserve it," Syulang said, her mouth twisting. "But I think it would eat you up inside, and I don't want that."
Shawn smiled and squeezed her friend's hand. When it was her turn, she took Syulang's advice and milked every painful moment for all it was worth, even Ninat's outburst, which Ninat had herself described with her eyes full of remorseful tears. Their audience was enthralled. By the time she was done, Shawn was satisfied that at least Pamtseo and Rol'txon could no longer be seen as heartless monsters.
After dinner, while Rai'uk was occupied by a conversation with some hunters, Shawn sought out Neytiri and explained her plan. The look of warm approval and pride she received hardened her resolve. As much as she respected and admired her mate, he was wrong. She would simply have to make him see it...hopefully in private. Publicly challenging his authority would only put him in a more difficult position and make him even less likely to agree. Of course, his wasn't the only agreement she needed, but hopefully Neytiri could take care of Jake when he arrived the next day.
"Come, Sha'ni," Rai'uk said, appearing at her side. "Let us rest."
"Finally," Shawn sighed, and led the way to a spot she'd had her eye on all evening.
Shawn settled down with a heartfelt sigh and laid her head on Rai'uk's chest. He held her close, pressing his cheek against her hair.
"I was so afraid, Sha'ni," he confessed. "If anything had happened to you..."
"Nothing did," she reminded him. "And you should not kill Pamtseo and Rol'txon."
Rai'uk sighed. "Sha'ni-"
"No, listen," she said firmly. "Remember our vision, when we bonded? We must all come together as children of Eywa."
"Yes, and how can that happen if malcontents can kill without fear of punishment?" Rai'uk cried.
"I did not say no punishment," Shawn said patiently. "I said do not kill them. Let them be sent away, instead...to the Omaticaya, where Dreamwalkers come and go each day. Let them see that the Sky People are not demons, that they...the ones left here...only want to learn."
Rai'uk was silent for several moments, considering her words. "They are dangerous, Sha'ni. Is it fair to ask the Omaticaya to harbor killers in their midst?"
"Pamtseo will not be able to hurt anyone for some time," Shawn pointed out. "And I think Rol'txon will not try anything while his mate is helpless. If Toruk Makto and Neytiri do not think they have changed their ways by the time Pamtseo heals...then...I do not know. I just know that killing them now solves nothing."
"We will put this to Toruk Makto when he arrives," Rai'uk promised. "But I don't know, Sha'ni...it is a lot to ask."
"Neytiri agrees with me," Shawn said smugly. "It is as good as done."
Rai'uk laughed. "Indeed. Hush, now, yawne. I want to show you how glad I am that you are alive."
"Alright," Shawn said equably, and snuggled closer as their queues—and lips—joined.
The next morning, Shawn awoke feeling almost normal. Rai'uk was up and about already, as usual. She went to wash up and then sat with Neytiri and Ninat for a good portion of the morning, keeping Neytiri's mind off her wound. Although Neytiri would never admit it, Shawn was sure she was hurting. Hopefully Moat and Jake would arrive soon. Shawn could think of no better tonic for Neytiri than her mother and mate...and her mother's tonics, of course. Shawn still had a lot to learn about the healing arts.
Jake arrived first and made a beeline for Neytiri, stopping only to exchange the briefest of greetings with Rai'uk. Shawn smiled. It wasn't scheming; it was serendipity. Well, perhaps not serendipity, considering the fact that she and Neytiri had both almost been killed, but certainly an opportunity to be taken advantage of. Jake was unlikely to deny Neytiri anything at this point. Now all she needed was Mo'at's stamp of approval and the thing was done.
"Try not to look so satisfied," Rai'uk murmured in her ear, slipping an arm around her shoulders.
"Why?" Shawn wanted to know. "A good thing will happen. An important thing."
"At the Omaticaya's expense," Rai'uk reminded her.
Shawn frowned. He was right; it did feel a lot like dumping it in Jake's lap and washing her hands of it.
"Perhaps...perhaps we might help, too," Shawn said. "Let the Dreamwalkers learn, too. Perhaps we...trade."
"Bring Dreamwalkers here," Rai'uk said, his nose wrinkling in distaste. Shawn laughed at the expression.
"We must do our part," Shawn said, smiling serenely.
"Even if it means inviting Normspellman to our home?" Rai'uk asked with raised brows.
That wiped the smile off her face.
"It is necessary," she said with a heavy sigh. "The things Norm said when he came...the things he thought...perhaps, if he and the others live among us..."
Rai'uk made a sound that in a less dignified man could be termed a petulant groan. "Come, we need to explain to Toruk Makto and see what he says. When we get back to Hometree we will gather the Council."
"This is right," Shawn said firmly. "I feel it."
"I believe you, yawne," Rai'uk assured her. "Let's go make it happen."
Jake wasn't thrilled about the plan, but agreed that integration and cooperation needed to start somewhere. He cheered up considerably when Rai'uk mentioned Shawn's idea to take some of the avatars off his hands.
"Not that it's a problem, exactly," he said sheepishly. "They just have so many questions. About everything. All the time. And they're so...noisy."
"So were you, once," Neytiri reminded him, moving gingerly to his side. "They will learn, as you did."
"You shouldn't be up," Jake said solicitously. "Your arm-"
"Is not what I use to walk," Neytiri said firmly. "If I sit in one place any longer, I will tear it off and somebody else's, too. Is it decided, then?"
"I guess so," Jake sighed. "It's not going to be easy."
"Nothing worthwhile is," Neytiri said.
"You send them to Compound, maybe," Shawn suggested. "For a little while."
"There's an idea," Jake said, looking pleased. "I'll talk to Max about it."
Mo'at, when she arrived, gave her blessing immediately once the plan was explained to her. Shawn was elated, until Mo'at took her aside and informed her that she would be going back to the Omaticaya to be with Neytiri while she healed and to oversee Pamtseo and Rol'txon's re-education. Shawn's pleasure at knowing her plan would work was stripped away entirely, leaving her with a terrible feeling of loss—and panic.
"You will not be alone," Mo'at assured her, seeing Shawn's distress. "I will send for Atansreu, the Tipani's Tsahik. She is ready to step down—in fact, she may have done so already. It will be good for you to learn from another. I do not know everything."
"I know," Shawn said morosely. "But I will miss you."
"And I, you, my child," Mo'at said gently. "But we will see each other again."
"You will come back?" Shawn said hopefully.
"Perhaps," Mo'at said with a smile. "You have much to learn. But I wonder if perhaps this may be the beginning of something wonderful. Too often people—even Tsahiks—never look beyond their own clan. Perhaps it is time we shared our knowledge more freely with one another. Perhaps another Tsahik will come to teach you. And in time, perhaps you yourself will leave your clan to teach a young Tsahik."
"This is a beginning for much," Shawn agreed. "I hope not too much."
"I don't think so," Mo'at said. "Trust yourself, Sha'ni, and be proud of what you have done."
"I will try," Shawn promised.
Syulang's reaction when Shawn told her of Atansreu's coming was curious. Shawn had thought she would be pleased, but Syulang squawked what Shawn understood to be a very rude word and stomped away. When she returned, she explained that Atansreu was the aunt that Syulang had been so willing to leave behind.
"Is she cruel?" Shawn asked worriedly.
"No," Syulang admitted. "Just chronically disappointed in me. She wanted me to be Tsahik."
"Perhaps now you mend things," Shawn suggested.
"Maybe," Syulang said dubiously. "It's possible she won't blame me so much if you're her student—Reynin was the most irritating person you'll ever meet. Aunt hated working with her."
Privately Shawn thought that perhaps Syulang's own guilt had more to do with the perceived depth of her aunt's disappointment in her, but that was a project for another day. For now, she wanted to focus on making the most of her last few days with her teacher before everyone went their separate ways and making sure Ateyo asked Ninat the question he was clearly bursting with while all her sisters were together to celebrate.
With some not-so-subtle prodding and assurances of Ninat's regard, Ateyo finally plucked up the nerve to choose Ninat as his mate. To no one's surprise, she accepted ecstatically and immediately asked—or more accurately, demanded—that Shawn stand as her witness during the ceremony. However, she unfortunately had to settle for Syulang instead since, as Mo'at pointed out, Shawn would be performing the ceremony. Syulang took being second choice with typical good humor and even didn't even seem to mind listening to Ninat's endless litany of Things To Do for her ceremony on the way home.
"We did not have a ceremony," Shawn commented to Rai'uk as they approached Hometree with Shawn seated behind Rai'uk as he guided a pa'li through a shallow stream.
"It didn't seem right, under the circumstances," Rai'uk said with a shrug. "The mating ceremony celebrates life and joy and, above all, the choosing. You didn't choose."
"But I did," Shawn said. "Or I have. Did...did you?"
Rai'uk took her hand from where it rested on his hip and kissed it. "Never doubt it, yawne."
"Do you think...perhaps we might have a ceremony, too," Shawn suggested, laying her face against his broad back. "Is that allowed?"
Rai'uk went very still, then twisted and seized Shawn, pulling her into his lap. The pa'li snorted and tossed its head, then quieted. Shawn squeaked as Rai'uk all but crushed the air from her lungs. When he released her, she laughed and reached up to kiss him, marveling at how easy it now seemed when only weeks ago, it had seemed more daunting than facing down a thanator.
"You can have whatever you want, yawne," he said. "A ceremony, I think, would be no great hardship. Your people love you. They will be happy to support you in this."
Shawn frowned. "Pamtseo and Rol'txon..."
"Are gone, and never belonged in the first place," Rai'uk said firmly. "Your clan adores you, Sha'ni. Just listen."
"What?" Shawn quieted, pricking her ears, then heard it: the sound of voices raised in song. When she realized what song it was, she nearly cried.
Her clan approached through the trees, having come out to meet the returning party. As they approached, their music grew louder and Shawn could hear their words.
"Somewhere over the rainbow, blue birds fly
Birds fly over the rainbow
Why, then, oh why can't I?"
When he reached them, Iley reached up to clasp Rai'uk's arm in greeting, then took Shawn's hand and patted it, beaming. Now her clan was all around her, hands patting her legs and clasping her arms. Everywhere, the same greeting was on everyone's lips:
"Welcome home, Tsahik."
So this is the end. Big thanks to everyone who read and reviewed. I had a general plot idea for a longer story, but this seemed like a natural place to end it (especially given my tendency to lose steam). If anyone is interested in continuing this story themselves, feel free—just make sure you tell me so I can read it!