This was going to be a LOT longer, but I kind of wrote myself to this end and it just kind of refuses to budge. So here it is, short, sweet and to the point! Please review and let me know what couple to do for the next chapter. Thank you!
Chapter Five: Fair
"Finn, stop!" she just barely gets the words out, more like whispers them but they're loud enough. Their lips are just barely touching, the slightest of grazes is all she's going to allow at the moment, but she feels overwhelmed by him. His scent fills her nostrils, he towers over her, she can feel his body heat radiating across to her, his biceps are taunt under her fingertips, and from his ragged breathing she knows he's barely able to hold himself back. She can feel a tightness in her chest as she pushes against his arms, willing him to back up when every fiber of her being screams to be taken in them instead. She wants that more than anything else in the world right now, to feel safe and protected in his arms shielded from everything that could force them apart and locked safely up in their private world. Her heart is begging her to forget Puck, her brain yells at her that she loves the dumb former quarterback, and her soul cries out for its other half, but she ignores them until he is an arm's length away and the breath she was holding escapes.
"San..." is all he says, and with that one little word he conveys everything he's feeling. He knows she knows too, the pain of pushing him away is written clearly on her face to anyone who knows her well enough. Which means he's the only one who can see it. He's not smart, he knows that, he does what he feels is right when it feels right to do it and he pushes negative thoughts of consequences out of his head. Ironically it's something he learned to do from Puck of all people. That's how they ended up on this balcony, upstairs and away from the other guests, clinging to each other for dear life until her rational side took over again and she pushed him away. She was less than a yard away from him, and yet he has never felt more separate from her. He knows if his feelings were different this situation would be easy, if all he wanted was to bang his best friend's girlfriend she'd let him and they would be going at it like rabbits right now. In her own private and twisted code of ethics she would say it was only fair. If he just wanted to use her, as both sex object and tool for revenge, impregnate her and spread the word around in order to humiliate Puck like the latter had done to him back in high school, she would let him. In her own private and twisted code of ethics she would say it was fair.
He doesn't just want her body though he wants everything: every little thing from her kisses to her heart. He wants to wake up before her and watch as she crinkles her nose in that adorable fashion because she doesn't want to wake up herself. He wants lazy mornings in bed, brunch at two o'clock, and warm afternoons laying next to his pool. He wants to go to the scary movies she hates so she hides behind her hands like a two year old or buries her face in his chest. He wants to be scared shitless when Mr. Lopez shows off his gun collection, and embarassed when Mrs. Lopez pinches his cheek and says what beautiful grandchildren he'll give her. He wants her brothers to 'accidentally' knock him down several flights of stairs or have a 'hunting accident' whenever he hurts her and sends her crying to her parents' house. He wants to see that look of triumph on her face when she stares at Rachel and silently tells her to stay away from her man, bitch! He wants her and she wants him, but they can't be together, and in her own private and twisted code of ethics she would say that that was fair too. She's Santana Lopez, and she gets what she wants... but not what she needs.