A/N: Thank you SO much for the reviews and faves and everything, so much appreciated. Since we're getting down to the nitty-gritty, I had to move this rating up to M. I don't think it's TOO M, but I needed to take the precaution because of the content of the chapter. Anyways, I hope you enjoy, and reviews would be lovely, thanks! :)
I can't tell him I'm nervous because I know he's nervous, and I don't want to frighten him. He's kind of like a deer in the headlights right now, and I don't want to be the truck that barrels over him. So I just kiss him, leaning forward and pressing a chaste kiss to his mouth. He's a quick learner though because soon his tongue is pressing against my mouth. I should have known he'd be quick on his feet, he's made from perfection after all.
I laugh a little at my own stupid joke, and he pulls away to look at my face, "Am I doing something wrong?"
He's worried, and it's adorable. I just want to be with him forever, if that's possible, and I know it is, well, sort of, I don't know how long he's going to be here and I have to make sure I take advantage of him here. I nod and give him a smile, "I was just thinking about how you're such a quick learner, it's cute."
"I'm just kind of doing what you were doing," he tells me and he brushes my hair back. He's good at this touching thing, knowing what he wants to do, how he wants to do it. I wonder how long he's thought about this. I wonder how many times his hands may have itched wanting to push my hair out of my face. I reach up and grasp his hand in my own, keeping it next to my face, as I turn my head to kiss his palm.
"You don't have to impress me," I tell him.
"I wasn't planning on it," he says, then he laughs, "that doesn't exactly sound like a ringing endorsement for myself, does it?"
"Not really, but you're pretty perfect as it is," I respond, and it's kind of true. He is perfect, maybe it's perfect for me, but there's something beyond that. God made him this way, specifically for me. I ask a question that neither of us can answer, "How did this happen, Chris?"
"I'm not sure," he admits, and he's always sincere so there's really nothing about this that's familiar to him. I shouldn't care how this happened, but my mind still tries to unravel this mystery.
I decide to forget about the hows for a moment and I instead ask, "When did you fall in love with me?"
"The moment you were born," he responds immediately, and damn it, if it were any other guy, I wouldn't believe them, I'd laugh in their face and tell them to quit with the lines, but Chris can't lie, he has to tell the truth, and this is his truth. So I just smile and I reach out to rub his cheek.
"That's not what I meant."
"I don't know, one second I was just…I couldn't think about…I don't know," he says, frowning as he tries to pinpoint a moment. I can see a parade of moments flashing in his eyes, like he's scanning them all and analyzing them to try and find the right one. "They just all…every moment…"
"I get it," I finally let him off the hook. Instead, I lean forward again and kiss him. He responds eagerly, and inwardly I cheer. This man wants me, no, this angel wants me. Do you know what it's like to feel wanted by a being that has known all the wonders of God and the angels and all of that? Let me tell you, it feels pretty damn good. I scoot myself further up on the bed and wrap my arms around his neck. I start slowly moving myself down onto the mattress, pulling Chris down with me.
I'm not sure if he knows exactly what I'm doing, but he's taking lead pretty well. His hands land on my waist, giving me a slight squeeze and then I'm startled as he pulls away and pulls me further up on the bed. He gives me a grin and I think my mouth is going to split right up to my ears. I don't have time to smile though because his lips are back on mine, expertly exploring my mouth. I run my hands up and under his shirt, and holy mother of God, his abs are perfection. Now I know he's real and everything, but there's something so unreal about his body. I run my hands all the way up his chest, bunching his shirt under his arms. I want it off because I want to see his body so I grab the hem and start lifting it up.
He pulls away briefly to let me get the t-shirt over his head and yes, my God, crafted from perfection. Do all angels look like this because if they do, it's just unfair, it's just too damn unfair. I run my hands over him again, checking to make sure if he's real. I look up into his eyes and he's looking at me amusedly. I blush because I probably look like I'm awestruck or something. He leans in and he kisses my cheek then the corner of my mouth before we continue this heated makeout session, but I want more, I need more.
Chris lays flush on top of me, my hips cradling his legs and I can feel him getting aroused through his jeans. I wonder if this is the first time he's ever been aroused. That's a strange thought, not one I want to dwell on because the chances of him seeing me naked before are 100% or at least very close to that. "Chris, have you seen me naked?" I don't even know where that came from, but I'm suddenly mumbling the question against his lips.
"Excuse me?" he pulls away and why am I still talking and not doing this with him? Oh yeah, I wanted to savor every moment of being with him, that's right. Except now I'm not savoring, I'm asking dumb questions.
"Um, have you seen me naked? I mean, you're always around, so you must have, right?"
"Yes, I have, but I wasn't looking at you like a pervert," he tells me.
"I never thought that, I just…it kind of ruins the surprise, you know, that moment where you're kind of like nervous to see that person, and the kind of like, oh wow, this is it, nothing is between us moment, I mean…I don't know how to say it properly."
"I think I'm still going to pretty much be awed, Steph."
Okay, can I just love him forever already? The way he says that…I'm momentarily blinded by the love I feel for him, but then his hand is on the hem of my shirt and he's tentatively reaching underneath it. His hands skim against my stomach, feathery light, and I gasp at the contact. I wasn't expecting it, but he's so gentle it's like a butterfly's wings battering against my skin. He looks at me, asking with his eyes if this is okay and I nod imperceptibly, but he moves upward, his touch becoming firmer as he goes higher and higher.
His hand reaches its destination and suddenly things start to get really intimate. He looks at me again to make sure he's doing this alright and I moan in appreciation as his hands knead my breast. He smiles proudly, like he's just figured out everything the universe and I need to kiss him again. I pull him down as our lips meet for the hundredth time that evening. I'm done with things going slowly, and I'm done with talking. I don't want to talk to him any longer. I've spent years talking to him, I've spent years seeing him, now I just want to feel and taste him, that's it.
I arch up against his hand as he massages my sensitive skin. He doesn't need lessons for this. I would say it's human nature, but he's not human. It just must be divine intervention because he knows what he's doing. I pull away for a second to rip my shirt off my body since he's not taking the initiative and he stares down at me in wonder. He probably doesn't know how he got to this point either, but I think, no, no, I know he's enjoying it. I can feel how much he's enjoying it as he's pressed against the lower half of my body. All I care about though is that we got to this point.
I haven't felt this good with anyone in my entire life. There are certain moments where you just know everything is perfect, and this is it. I have never felt like this with any man in my entire life, and now I know why. It's because of Chris. This was meant to happen. If knowing God exists and having a guardian angel has taught me anything, it's that things are meant to happen. This was always meant to happen. This is how things always had to be. Chris had to talk to me that night, I had to fall in love with him. Our paths have been the same since…forever.
The problem with Chris not ever having been with a woman or touched a woman is that he's kind of focusing on one thing…or two if we're being blunt. I gently flip him over so I'm straddling him and I gaze down at him as his eyes widen, probably realizing this is really going to happen. I run my nails over his skin before I reach back and unhook my bra, letting the fabric loose as I pull it off and throw it to parts unknown. Chris's eyes widen even further, and I'm suddenly not worried that he's seen me naked before because the look on his face is just that right tinge of awe.
"You're so beautiful," he whispers as he stares at me.
"You're not so bad yourself," I joke with him as his hands rest on my waist. I grind myself against him and he groans, the strain probably too much for him to bear. I reach down and undo his belt and then unzip his pants. I make sure he's watching as I do this. I bite my lip in anticipation, rolling off him so I can pull his pants down. I wonder, but only for a moment, how he got clothes in the first place. I mean, I know he had them on all the time, but where did they come from. No matter, I'm leaving him in his boxers, and it's clear just how much he wants me. I smirk up at him and I reach to undo my own pants, but he's standing up in front of me.
"Let me," he says, stopping my hand from going any further. I let go of my fly as he reaches forward, hands trembling a little bit as he slowly undoes the buttons on my pants, ripping the zipper down slowly and then shedding me of my pants and underwear at the same time. He gulps audibly as he stands there, gazing down at my body, taking in everything as I stand there, uninhibited and vulnerable. "God…you're amazing."
"Thanks," I say for lack of anything better to say. His hands skim over my sides before he leans down to kiss me, his lips trailing down my neck as they make their way to my chest. He gives me wet, open mouth kisses as I throw my head back, loving the way his tongue finds the peaks and valleys of my skin. The air cools me every time he leaves one spots and find another. His hand sneaks its way down to the apex of my thighs and a couple fingers brush against my wetness and I gasp as he sinks his fingers into me. Well, he certainly didn't need a lesson with that.
"Is this okay?" he breathes against my breast.
"God yes…" I can barely get the words out because my brain is on fire from his touch. I haven't been with a guy in a while so I feel extra sensitive to his every ministration. He moves his fingers and I have to grasp onto him to steady myself as I press my lips against his neck. He's kissing where his lips can find skin, my neck, my shoulder, everywhere.
I want him to continue, but I want to feel him inside of me even more, so I blindly reach down to grab at his boxers, pushing them down so they pool around his feet. I chance a look down and…oh God is good, God is very good. I don't know why he decided to bless Chris, but Lord, you have blessed Chris. I feel like saying a prayer right then and there, but instead, I think God will forgive me for my next actions as I grasp Chris and return the favor he's giving me. Chris nearly jerks out of my grasp as the sensation is probably nothing he's ever felt before.
"Oh geez," he grunts, "holy…"
"Oh yes, holy is right," I nip at his neck. "I need you, Chris, right now. I can't wait any longer."
He just nods, and I think my hand has made him speechless. I push him back on the bed as he kicks off his boxers and I kick away my underwear. I give him one long lick as he moans loudly and then I move so I'm lying on the bed. I beckon him and he eagerly scrambles over me. "Are you sure about this?" he has the decency to ask me, looking so sweet and innocent.
"Of course," I tell him, pulling him over me. I grasp him in my hand and guide him inside of me. He goes slow, agonizingly slow and I wrap my legs around his ass to prompt him to go forward, to quicken his pace because I want him, all of him.
When he's finally seated, I think I see heaven. Actually, it's just Chris, but he might as well be heaven because I'm so sure at this moment we were meant for each other. He lets me get used to him, and he's so good at this, I almost wonder if he's done it before…maybe he's been studying…okay, gross thought. "Can I move?" he whispers in my ear. I nod against his neck, burying my face into his scent.
Yup, I definitely see heaven. He feels so good, he might not have ever done this before, but my God, is he good at it! He hits every right place, every spot inside my body that has me crying out and arching my hips and meeting his every thrust. He whispers nonsensical words to me in between heated kisses. I feel my climax coming at me like a freight train. I wish I could just hold onto this moment forever, and I might as well soon. His thrusts become erratic and I know he's close too.
"Let it go, Chris, just let it go," I tell him and he buries his face into my neck as he reaches the pinnacle. I feel myself let go a moment later and it's breathtaking. His weight above me, around me, inside of me, it's all so overwhelming, and I almost feel like crying from how beautiful and wonderful this moment is. It's everything I've been waiting for. Chris was so right when he said I'd never been in love. This is love, right here, this is all love, it's encompassing, it's more than I ever thought it would be.
Chris rests on top of me, his weight not bothersome at all. "Wow…wow, now I know why you always liked that."
I can't help but laugh as I run my fingers through his hair. "I love you, Chris."
"God, I love you, Stephanie."
This is simply perfection.