A/N: We are sincerely sorry for the delay on this chapter! yeah, we know like only two people read this, but we like to make everyone feel special! Anyway, we hope you enjoy(;

DISCLAIMER: We do not own Degrassi or any of it's characters.

SUMMARY

Elijah yearns for any way out; a trapped door that allows him to dodge the scorching knives whipped at his heart. But when she enters his world, that escape slips through his fingers, and the complicated story of his life begins to unfold. Little does Elijah know that there will be more than just ripped pages detracting from his tattered book.

WEIGHT OFF MY SHOULDERS:

Tap-tap-tap-tap-tap. I concentrated on tapping my pencil against the vandalized school desk as the seconds ticked by like decades. Clare was shooting me death glares from across the room. I kept my eyes locked on the desk.

"I have to go do something. No talking, kids." Mrs. Dawes slowly exited the empty classroom. Only Clare and I had detention today. All I could think about was how much trouble I was going to be in. Though this wasn't my first run in detention, I was still going to catch as much as crap as the first time.

"I can't believe you landed us both in detention, Goldsworthy! It's my first day and I'm already missing homeschool." Clare hissed, causing me to roll my eyes.

"My apologies, Saint Clare." My brain pounded against my skull, bearing excruciating pain. Every time I got a headache, it would turn into a terrible, terrible migraine. No amount of medication could rid me of it.

My head slumped down in between my arms as my thoughts rattled around in my head like a soda can on a city street, intensifying the pain. I held my eyes clenched closed, avoiding the harsh fluorescents. A barely audible whimper escaped my lips.

"Uhm, Elijah? Are you okay?" A timid voice rang out, nearly shattering my eardrums. In a matter of seconds, I felt someone hovering next to me.

My head instantly lifted to face whoever had presented themselves in front of me, and I immediately regretted it. The light burst through my eyes and added heat to the fire that was burning inside my head. I hissed in pain, closing my eyes yet again, mentally kicking myself for acting like such a wimp in front of someone for a headache. A headache!

"What's wrong?" The voice finally registered as Clare's. Why did she care? Wasn't she just chewing me out for getting her in trouble?

"It's just a headache." I murmured.

"Some headache; you look like you're going to pass out!" Her small, delicate hand landed itself on my knee, causing me to shiver.

"I'm fine."

"Are you sure, because you sure aren't acting fine? Even in class you were acting off…" Was it that easy to tell that I was wacked out of my mind?

"I'm fine."

I heard her pull something out of a folder, or her bag, or some container. "Look, Eli. Does this look fine to you?" She shoved the half sheet of notebook paper from class this morning in my face. I jumped, getting lost in the paper. My headache slipped to the backburner of my head as I studied the mishmash of words, phrases, and black marks.

Everything that Clare had said was there. I could make out words like sister, yellow, cat, pizza. It was all there, just not in a legible, nor expected order.

"Can we just forget about this? It's nothing. I've just had a rough few days. I'm tired." My tense hands crumpled up the heart-pounding paper.

"What happened?" She prodded curiously.

"Nothing." I mumbled. Tears crowded behind my eyelids. Julia happened.

"You can tell me, Eli." She nagged.

I remained mute, focusing on not crying.

"What happened? It might make you feel better. You can trust me." I was losing my patients with her. I could feel the rage boiling inside of me.

"Plea–"

"Fine, Clare. You want to know what the fuck happened? She killed him. She fucking killed him! I screamed at her so fucking badly, Clare. And she was crying so fucking hard. And I didn't care. She took off and got herself hit by a truck." Tears flowed freely down my face as my chest heaved angrily. Disbelief rolled around in my thoughts. Did I seriously just tell Clare everything? The day mashed together in my head. Students and walls became one. Lockers and windows slammed into each other like cars in collision.

Clare's petite features trembled. She had that 'prey-being-hunted' look in her eye like Piper has had for God knows how long when she's around me. Her crystal blue eyes sparkled in the fluorescent lights. She looked so helpless, so afraid. I turned away from her, wiping my palms over my cheeks.

"You can go now, you two." Mrs. Dawes strolled back into the stuffy classroom. Honestly, I wished she never left. I hastily brushed my books into my arm and left the classroom.

My footsteps echoed in my head as I bolted out of Degrassi. My legs wobbled as I cautiously stepped on the sidewalk. I hated walking home. The sidewalks were so close to the streets, you were basically asking to be hit.

For a brief moment, I felt better somehow. Like admitting that Julia was dead lifted something huge off my shoulders. Like that's what she wanted me to do. My hopes lifted; maybe all of this would stop. Life would return to my screwed-up normal.

My relief was short-lived.

My headache returned, paralyzing me with excruciating pain. I pressed on for a few more blocks until I couldn't take it anymore. I fell to my knees in front of some community playfield. My stomach wretched as vomit poured from my mouth. My eyes became insanely blurry as the world practically danced around me.

My heart raced and pounded in my ears as I kept heaving. The entire content of my stomach, including acid, was emptied onto the grass in front of me. Slowly, I rolled over onto my back, making sure not to lay in my vomit.

My frantic fingers searched my pockets for my cell phone. I quickly grasped it and dialed the familiar number.

"Eli?"

"I need you to come pick me up, Seth."

"Where are you? You were supposed to be home hours ago! Mom and Dad are flipping!"

"I had detention. You really need to come get me. I think I'm dy-" Before I had time to finish, my body decided I wasn't done yet. More puke flew from my mouth.

"Are you throwing up? It's your head, isn't it? Where are you?" I could hear his heavy steps thumping around on some hard wood floor.

"In front of the playfield a few blocks from school. I'm sure you can't miss me." I pushed out, desperately trying to hold down whatever was left.

"I'll be right there." The ear shattering ending tone made me cringe.

I lost track of time as I laid in the grass next to a puddle of throw up, but soon enough, Seth pulled up in his stupid, small car.

"Great." He muttered. "Can you stand up?"

I clenched my eyes shut as I stumbled to my feet, wincing at the sudden, sharp-stabbing pain in my temples. I slid into the backseat of the Aveo and laid down along all three seats.

"You need to start carrying around Excedrin or something." His voice was like a dagger.

"It doesn't work." I whimpered. Every turn we made hurt. Every sound he made hurt. Everything hurt.

As soon as it started, the awful car ride came to an end. I climbed out of the car and dragged myself up to the house, leaving my books in Seth's car. I'd get them later.

"Where the hell have you been, Elijah? Your poor sister had to walk home all alone because you didn't show up to get her!" My father's angry voice boomed as I entered the hellhole. His words went right through me.

"I'm sorry." I couldn't speak louder than a whisper, everything was magnified.

"You're sorry, huh? I'm sorry too. I'm sorry that my six year old had to walk home from school today alone. What if she was kidnapped, Elijah? Who would you blame then?"

"Can you please stop yelling?" I clutched the sides of my head like it was about to explode.

"I'll yell if I damn well please! How 'bout that one, son?" He was inches from my face now. My father angry was fucking scary. He was a pretty intimidating man when he was happy. His voice triggered the all too familiar feeling of stomach acid rising to my through.

"I'm going to be sick." I quickly darted to the nearest bathroom and hugged the toilet, emptying whatever was left of my stomach contents, which was surprisingly a lot, considering I hadn't eaten in four days.

"Sweetie, here's a few aspirins; I think you should take them." My mother knelt down beside me and rubbed my back as I continued to vomit into her freshly cleaned toilet bowl.

"They don't help." I murmured.

"It won't hurt to take them, honey." She handed me two small pills and a glass of water. I shoved them down my throat and gulped down the water.

"I'm going to bed." I mumbled as I tripped out of the bathroom. My father shook his head in disappointment as I climbed the steps to my bedroom.

I glanced into Piper's room before I entered my own. She sat on her pink, twin bed with her legs crossed Indian-style. Her long hair fell in front of her face, making it impossible for her to see me.

Without thinking, I rapped my fist on the doorframe. Her startled blue eyes flicked up to look at me. A gasp escaped her lips. "W-What do you need, Elijah?"

"I'm, uh, I'm sorry. I had to stay after school, that's why I couldn't get you." I leaned against the wood for support. My legs felt like they were about ready to give out.

"Um, uh, it's okay…" She stated it more like a question than an acceptance of my apology.

I gave her a fake nod and slipped back down the hallway and into my dark, comforting bedroom. I slowly slid underneath the gray covers and rolled over to face the wall.

"You alright, man?" Seth's voice boomed from the doorway. I imagined myself as a superhero. 'YouAlright Man', best superhero since Superman.

"Outstanding." I muttered.

"It'll get better, bro." Seth said as sincerely as, I think, he possibly could. With that, he gently closed my bedroom door and padded back down the hallway.

I sure hope so, but probably not.