Category: Sam angst

Spoilers: 6.05 Nightwalkers, 5.11 Desperate Measures and up to, and including, More Than Anyone.

Content Warnings: None.

Summary: Whilst Jack is still with the Tok'ra, Sam gets a mysterious midnight phone-call which dregs up memories from when she was kidnapped for Adrian Conrad. She and SG-1 go to investigate and stumble onto more than they bargained for.

Episode 6.05 Nightwalkers

A shrill ringing noise startled her and Sam rolled over and reached for the phone on her bed-side table. There was no phone where it should be. Instead Sam reached for the switch to the lamp as the ringing continued. She had to answer the phone before the noise woke up her daughter. Daniella was still not sleeping well because of the teething and absence of Jack; Sam really did not want to wake her. She could not find the light switch. As her brain started to wake up fully, Sam realised that she was in her new bedroom, in her new house and the bedside table with lamp and phone on was on the left hand side of the bed not the right hand side. She rolled across the bed and reached for the phone, seeing the clock for the first time. It was two o'clock in the morning and Sam was not sure if she was more confused by her location or who was ringing at this time in the morning.

Holding the phone to her ear, Sam sleepily whispered in the darkness, "Hello?" It dawned on her that it might be someone from the SGC calling regarding Colonel O'Neill. He had been with the Tok'ra for over a week. Last that the base had heard from the Tok'ra was that Jack was fully healed from the Ancient virus, but they were still searching for a suitable replacement host for Kanan. Sam was not sure that keeping Jack until a new host was found had been part of the agreement, but there was little they could do.

"Major Carter?" said the panicked voice on the phone.

"Yes, who is this?" Something told her that it was not an SGC related matter. She sat up straighter in the bed, reaching over and turning on the light.

"My name is Richard Fleming, Doctor Fleming. You don't know me, but I know about you and Adrian Conrad."

"How did you get this number?" Sam did not often think about her ordeal at the hands of Adrian Conrad and to be reminded of it at two am when she was alone in the house with a baby was not something that she wanted.

"I need your help. Major, the program was never shut down. It's completely out of hand. You need to protect me."

"What project?"

"They know-" The phone line went dead and Sam stared at the phone for a few moments before putting it down. The ordeal with Conrad had been ten months ago when she had been six months pregnant. It really was something that she tried to forget. The decision had been made during her pregnancy to not be an active member of SG-1, to avoid the dangers of travelling off-world, however, Sam had been kidnapped, sedated and almost killed in the name of research whilst on her own planet. It had been after an ante-natal gym session when Sam had been attacked in the parking lot. She had put up a slight fight with the masked men, but was limited due to her pregnancy bump. Despite the obviousness of her situation, the men had shown little regard and Sam had shouted out that she was pregnant. It had not stopped them bundling her into the van and sedating her until she awoke in Adrian's hospital.

A whimper from the baby monitor brought Sam back to the present and her bedroom rather than the sterile confines of her memory. Seeking reassurance, Sam quietly walked towards her daughter's bedroom with the cordless phone still in her hands and glanced in on her. Daniella was still sleeping and looked perfectly peaceful. Something was still troubling her and Sam found herself worried. Ever since she had discovered that she was pregnant, something had changed within her. She panicked very slightly more and had greater concerns over safety. Conrad's people had gotten to her once before and he was still out there somewhere, along with his companies. Just as she had tried to protect herself and unborn child during her captivity, Sam now felt the need to protect her daughter to a greater extent than she alone could.

Without a second thought, Sam picked up the phone again and dialled one of her speed-dial numbers. It was picked up after only one ring. "Major Carter?" Teal'c's voice greeted.

"Teal'c, sorry about the lateness in calling."

"It is of no concern, Major. Are you and Daniella in need?"

"I had an odd phone call. It's silly really."

"Do you require my company?"

She relaxed against the wall. "Yes, thank you, Teal'c."

XxXxXxX

She is in the parking lot, heavy gym bag slung over a shoulder when she hears the tyres. She doesn't turn, believing it to be simply a car, another patron of the gym. Carefully, she places the bag on the backseat of her car and then places a hand on her bump. Her baby kicks her and she smiles, distracted from the world around her until there's a hand on her shoulder. She turns and sees four or five men dressed in black with ski masks on. She can't see them all. She doesn't have the time to see them all. Are there more? She punches out, catches one man on the jaw. Another is running at her and she raises her knee. She hears a grunt, but then an arm reaches around her waist. It drags her backwards and she knows she's nearing the van. She can't be put in that van. She needs to fight harder. She needs to try harder.

"Please!" She hears her own screaming voice. "I'm pregnant!" Her voice is strained and unusual to her ears. She falls into the dark van filled with the black-clad men. She continues falling through the darkness, deeper and deeper until there is no light.

And in an instant her world lights up. The bright white surrounds her, envelopes her and burns her all over. Her eyes sting with the pain that is emanating from every nerve of her being. The pain subsides and she can see a ceiling; square white tiles in rows. Her clothes are different, loose around her body and stomach. A numbness is creeping out of her body, but she can't feel her hands or legs. She can feel the skin over her stomach, knows the clothing is loose, but she can't feel anything inside. She recognises the suffocating feeling of sedation and she fears for her child.

Trying to move a hand, she tries to touch her stomach, but something tightens around her wrist. She tries to sit up, her legs won't move but their numbness is fading. She panics. What have they done to her? What about her baby? Her baby isn't moving; it isn't kicking.

The cold metal knife touches against her palm and she works at the restraints. A door opens and she covers the knife. She has to keep it hidden. She needs to keep it for later. She needs to get free. They approach her with syringes out, ready to pollute her system.

"I'm pregnant!" Her voice is hoarse from screaming. They have to understand. Her system can handle it, but her baby is defenceless. "Please! Please don't give me that. Please!" She's never begged like this before, but she has no other course of action. She needs to remain alert and she must protect her child.

She's running, her loose clothing flapping against her. Her baby kicks, alerting her to the oddness of bouncing. She can't stop. She can't make things better unless she gets out and her child should be glad to no longer be sedated. A noise causes her to pause and she ducks behind a wall. Footsteps approach her and she punches out. Warm blood flies outward from the blast, covering her hand. He recoils backwards and she snaps her elbow into his nose. She smells the blood and she fights the vomit rising up her oesophagus. He falls to the floor; the clatter of his gun echoes loudly. She grabs it up. It's heavy and cold, unusual in her hand. She looks at it curiously. It's alien to her.

The need to run is overwhelming and she runs, ready to kill anyone who appears. She keeps running, down a corridor, around a corner. Corridor after corridor, corner after corner. It's a maze from which she can't escape. The man in the wheelchair stops her. He's wearing a mask. She fears him. He's going to be her destruction.

"The damage is irreversible." Silence. Echoes of nothing. "I'm dying." The alien gun. Her sedated, body which is a stranger to her. "You're my only hope." Metallic… vomit… tight… loose… cold… alien… black… I'm dying… bright… blinding… Hope… Her.

"No!" Everything is swirling in front of her and she puts a hand to the cold sterile wall. Her other hand reaches to her belly and it's flat. She looks down, nauseous, scared, confused. There's no pregnancy bump; her child is gone. She looks back up at the masked man in the wheelchair. He needs her, she sees it in his eyes. He's going to die without her. He's going to die with her. Everything's still spinning and he steps out of the wheelchair. He starts to remove the mask and his eyes glow. She's responsible. "Jack." He lifts his arm, points at her and then she sees the gun.

Silence… kicking… hope… dying… dark… overwhelming… blinding… pain… cold… metal… guns… blood… alien… Bang!

XxXxXx

"Major Carter?" Sam opened her eyes to see the shadowed face of Lieutenant Nicola Carpenter above her. Her chin length black-as-night hair was mussed and not for the first time in the week, Sam realised that she had been awoken suddenly in the middle of the night.

"Lieutenant?" she questioned, sitting up in the bed as Carpenter moved backwards.

"You were screaming." Out of the corner of her eye, Sam watched as Carpenter sat back on her own bed and she remembered. She had received a phone call in the middle of the night from a doctor in Steveston who was killed after asking for her help. The next morning, after expanding a link with Adrian Conrad and his companies, General Hammond had sent Sam, along with Daniel, Teal'c and Lieutenant Carpenter to investigate. It was the first proper mission that Sam had been sent on and she had tried to object. The general had pointed out that she had returned to work, with no off-world activity, and that she was needed to lead the team. It was the first time that she had spent the night away from her daughter and Sam did not like it. Especially with the fact that Jack was still with the Tok'ra although at least Janet had been available to take care of Daniella. They had been in Steveston for just one day and Sam was questioning the relevance of the mysterious death to the SGC and her in particular.

"Sorry," she apologised and the lieutenant smiled at her. Sam did not know Carpenter very well, but in the dim light of the motel room Sam felt the need to explain. "It was a nightmare."

Carpenter nodded somewhat hesitantly. "Because of Conrad?" Sam met her eyes and nodded almost imperceptibly. SG-1 had been the team to find her and rescue her from Conrad's doctors who had been on the verge of dissecting her brain. They had only paused when Sam had tried to appeal to their humanity, reminding them that she was pregnant and they were about to kill both her and her unborn child. Daniel and Carpenter had burst in right at that moment, preventing them from continuing in their plan. At the time, Daniel had told Sam they had linked her to the NID through Maybourne and an anonymous source. She later discovered that, in fact, Jack had returned from Edora but had not wanted Sam to know. It had been Jack who had located Maybourne, contacted Simmonds and come up with the location of the hospital.

"He's still out there and whilst nothing we learned today implicates him in Fleming's death, there's the possibility." She knew that was not the full reason behind her nightmares. Conrad turned into Jack during the terrors because of the parallels between them. Conrad had been desperate to find a way to live, to reverse the effects on his immune system and the captive Jaffa's Goa'uld was his only option. He had been naïve, believing that his people could find a way to remove the Goa'uld after he was healed. His motives had, in a sense, been pure and he had tried to keep his actions as innocent as possible. It had been his personal assistant who had ordered Sam's brain to be examined, not Conrad. Sam was finding it difficult to distinguish. She had made the decision for Jack to become a host, to use Kanan to heal him and then leave Jack whole again. Both then and now actions were only occurring because of humanity's desire to live and it had made Sam selfish.

The Tok'ra could not find a suitable replacement host for Kanan and until they could, Jack was to remain with them. Sam had not considered that and she knew that Jack would hate having Kanan in his head. The longer he remained with them, the more he would hate her and the more guilt weighed down on her.

"Try and go back to sleep, Major. I'll sit by the window and keep watch."

"What about you?" All of them required their sleep to function on this mission.

"I'll wake Teal'c up in a few hours and he can get the final shift." Sam nodded as Carpenter stood, turned off her bedside light and then turned on a smaller desk lamp next to the window. She watched for a few moments as Carpenter made herself comfortable and looked out of the window. Sam turned away and put her head down on the pillow. Closing her eyes, Sam hoped that sleep would come quickly without the nightmares. Tomorrow the four of them were planning on questioning other workers from Immunotech and she would need her wits about her.

Next Chapter – 6.06 Abyss

This chapter was actually quite difficult to write and changed dramatically from what I originally envisioned. I realised that Desperate Measures would have been during Sam's pregnancy and I figured out that it still had to happen and that Jack was the key to rescuing Sam so had to still be involved. In More Than I Want To, Jack returned to Earth and did not see or tell Sam for a month which is when he discovered she was pregnant. Desperate Measures occurs during that month period. Then for Nightwalkers itself, I had planned on just three of them going and leaving Sam at home with Daniella. However, none of the other three could have decrypted the files that they found and I did not want to give that skill to Carpenter as she's not supposed to be a Carter-Replica. From what I read, USAF maternity leave is well under seven months so it is quite reasonable that Sam is back "at work" and that she is the only one qualified for this mission so has to go.

Any thoughts?