Chapter Thirty

I've never been good at ending things, so I try not to start them. I keep everything constant all the time and avoid variables. But my life isn't a science experiment – to me, anyway. I can't always control everything. In fact, I barely ever control anything at all.

The whole supposed suicide ordeal is proof of that. And the evil father. And the sudden girlfriend with her magic fingers.

I think I'm off track.

As I was saying, I don't like to end things. I like to keep them the way they are and never change.

But sometimes things have to change. My relationship with Beck, which I dragged on long enough, for instance. If I hadn't ended that, I wouldn't have Vega right now. Or my residence in a mental clinic. If I hadn't changed that, I wouldn't have Vega in my bed right now.

Ah, sexual innuendo. What would I be without you?

I had to teach myself sex ed. You think my father was gonna do it? Hilarious. This is how I turned out.

Speaking of father, he left a twenty on my bed with a note saying 'Good show.' As if I was a stripper or something. But hey, at least he's making an effort.

I don't know why. I assume he feels bad for hating me or something to that extent. Or he just wanted some quality entertainment.

I don't care either way.

Back to Tori – we hold hands in the hallways. Cat said, "Aw!" in a voice that almost wasn't fake; Andre smiled politely, as he is known to do. Robbie sprinted away, cowering. Beck barely even seemed to notice. And Trina seemed to have gotten over us at some point, just coming over to complain to Tori about failing at something else.

We haven't gotten anything too bad, considering everyone loves her and is terrified of me.

Life's too short to even care at all, whoa...

Losing my mind, losing my mind, losing control

I picked up my phone, stopping the ring tone. "Hey, Vega," I said.

There was a sigh. "Do you really have to call me that?"

I laughed lightheartedly. "You trying to tell me you don't like it?"

"...That's not what I said."

"Didn't think so," I murmured, tossing a mini basketball around in my hands.

She let me revel in my smug moment before she spoke again. "I was just thinking and I realized we haven't had an official date yet."

I caught the ball, rolling my eyes. "Oh yeah?" I asked sarcastically. "And what exactly are the qualifications of an official date?"

"Y'know...," she muttered, embarrassed. "Like... going somewhere."

I chuckled. "We've gone places," I said softly, trying to make her feel more comfortable.

"I know," she whined. "But, you didn't, like, ask me to go on a date with you... we just went," I could literally detect her pout.

"Well... would you like to go on a date with me then?" I asked, a little confused.

There was a moment of hesitation. Then a tentative, "Yes."

I smiled. "I'll pick you up at eight. We can go mini-golfing, or to the movies, or some other cliché."

"Woohoo!" she yelped.

I laughed again. " I love you, Vega," I whispered.

"I love you, too, Jade."

Later, when we were getting some beloved tacos at a questionable booth on the street, she kissed me when the vendor turned his back. Maybe it wasn't some romantic spot away from everyone, with fireworks in the background and calming music. But it was perfect.

And I realize now, that nobody else is going to ever see something like that between us and think of it like that. Perfect. But I don't want them to – I'm too selfish. I want it to stay between us, that feeling. She's the only one I want to share it with.

It isn't about me anymore. If it was, it wouldn't matter if she feels that way. But I can always see it deep in her eyes, and that makes everything a hundred times better.

Nothing else matters. At all. My dad, he can do what he wants, he can try to make up for my lost childhood in a couple small gestures. It doesn't matter, as long as I have her.

If that lady escapes jail, whatever. With Tori by my side I'm fine. Always.

And maybe that's why I don't like endings – because I like how things are. I want her here. If she left, I wouldn't know what to do.

But maybe we won't be another failed teenage relationship. Maybe she'll always be around.

Maybe, just maybe, it won't have to end.

A/N - Yup, that's it.

I hope you enjoyed the story. Before you start sobbing, there will be more! Well, not of this. That M one-shot, if you're interested, will be out pretty soon, but then that's the end of this.

But moving on, I assure you I will write more Jori. And maybe Cade, although that's not my primary ship. It's still a good pairing.

In fact, I have some stuff in the works right now. Misread Lines and The Intimacy Factor. So, look out for that stuff. If you care for it.

It's not too late for you to review! Seriously. Do it.

For those of you who have been here forever, thank you for being awesome. I'd list your names, but I've already kind of done that. Sort of. You know who you are.

The song for Jade's ringtone was Cough Syrup by Young the Giant, in case anyone was wondering. Crazy awesome song, look it up.

So, yeah. That's it. First story. Thanks. Are we done here?

Till later, homies.