Chapter 22 - Squeaky Clean
The other guys joined me in the living room, as we waited for the women to give Bella her first bath. I heard clothing rip, and the women all sigh in unison.
"Let me help you take off the rest of your clothes, sugar," Charlotte offered. "Don't worry, you'll get the hang of it soon enough." We could hear the telltale noises of zippers unzipping, buttons unbuttoning, and clasps unhooking, as the rest of Bella's clothes were removed more gently.
"You know, if Esme and Bella weren't in there, this would be really hot," Emmett remarked, lost in thought. "I wouldn't mind if Rose and Char wanted to shower together. I can just picture them rubbing soap all over each other, the bubbles running down their bodies, making their skin slick . . ."
"Fuck yeah!" Peter agreed, adjusting himself. "I'd wanna watch that shit. I don't think Char would mind. How about Rose?"
I frowned shifting uncomfortably from the level of lust they were exuding. Carlisle's face was screwed up in disgust, his posture radiating his discomfort with the mental images their words were producing.
Two blurs raced down the stairs and smacked Emmett and Peter upside their heads.
"Ow!" Both boys shouted, rubbing their heads and pouting.
Rose and Charlotte were glaring at their men, with their hands on their hips.
"Do you really want some of Bella's first words to be the ones you just used, Peter Whitlock?" Char growled.
Peter thought about what he'd said and hung his head sheepishly. "Oops," he murmured, covering his mouth with his hand.
"I didn't think so," Char scoffed, whirling and stomping back up the stairs.
"Any you," Rose sneered at Emmett. He cowered back into the couch, holding his hands up in front of himself defensively. "You're really trying to go there while we're in the middle of giving our baby her first bath? You can't try thinking with your other head, you know, the one on your shoulders, once in a while?"
"Sorry, baby, I wasn't thinking," Emmett admitted, trying to give her puppy eyes to gain her forgiveness.
"No kidding," Rose agreed sarcastically, rolling her eyes. "I know it's hard for you, but please use your brain for a while, okay?"
"Right, sure thing," Emmett quickly replied, giving her a mock salute. "Yes, ma'am."
Rose shook her head in defeat and annoyance, gave him one last glare, and turned to join the other women upstairs.
"Well, that went well," Peter murmured, looking shiftily around at the rest of us. "So, what do ya wanna do now? Play cards?"
"Ooh, yeah, strip poker!" Emmett exclaimed excitedly.
"Emmett!" Rose shrieked warningly.
His face fell, and he pouted. "Right, well, it wouldn't have been fun with just guys playing anyway."
"I am so glad I'm not a mind reader," Carlisle muttered to himself. He caught my eye and smirked. "I've been thanking God for that daily since Emmett joined us."
I grinned back and nodded. "It's bad enough to feel it all the time, I can only imagine how bad it must be to listen to it too, much less see it in a vision. I suppose we really can't blame the dynamic duo for going insane. I don't know how long I'd be able to cling to any vestige of sanity if I had either of their gifts."
Carlisle chuckled. "You have a point there, son. Perhaps joining a remote monastery wouldn't be a bad plan for him. I doubt she'd join a nunnery though. The habits aren't terribly fashionable. I'll never forget our brief time in Pennsylvania back in the early sixties. I thought for sure she'd be burned at the stake if we'd stayed any longer."
"She was just lucky she was a vampire," Emmett declared. "Otherwise, she'd never have survived all the stones the Amish people were hurling at her."
"Well, she did insult their clothing and their lifestyle fairly harshly. Not to mention all the comments about their hairstyles and their lack of makeup. But I think the last straw was forcing those colorful designer outfits on the children, making them cry for their mothers."
"Then endangering them by spooking the horses and causing the barn animals to stampede," Rose reminded us from upstairs.
"Not to mention paying the power company to come out and hook up all their houses to electricity without their consent," Esme commented dryly. "She couldn't understand how they could exist without hair dryers and curling irons."
"And blasting that rock music outside the church on Sunday mornings!" Emmett added. "The stones didn't hurt Alice, but they sure did a number on the stereo!"
Just then we heard an odd sound, vaguely reminiscent of a sneeze, only vampires don't sneeze, followed by shouts of 'No!', 'Stop!', and 'Wait!'
The sneezing sound came again, this time with Bella's wail immediately thereafter.
"Oh, baby, you're not supposed to get that close to liquids when you try to smell them," Esme explained.
"No, ucky ahder!" Bella complained, making a snorting sound.
I heard Char's repressed giggles and felt her amusement as she comforted Bella. "Yer not supposed to sniff it, sugar. Or drink it either." Her last hasty sentence was followed by spitting noises and raspberries.
"It's for getting clean, Bella," Rose added. "You're supposed to stand under the spray so we can rinse your hair."
"That's a good girl," Esme cooed along with the sound of water droplets hitting stone flesh.
For some reason, I was having a hard time keeping myself in my chair. I felt a strong urge to be the one taking care of Bella, rinsing the blood out of her hair while combing my fingers through it. It wasn't a sexual urge, nor a paternal one. The idea simply filled me with warmth and comfort. I felt like it would bring me a sense of accomplishment and peace to be the one providing for her needs. I thought back to the few head injury victims I had changed in the past and confirmed that none of them had elicited such feelings in me. Then again, they were all males, and I hadn't known any of them as humans before changing them, so I had no prior attachment or investment into their wellbeing prior to turning them into vampires. I had been protective of Bella as a human, so it wasn't too surprising that such emotions had carried over, though I wasn't sure why they had intensified.
Emmett had found a deck of cards, and the four of us men sat around playing poker, waiting for the women to finish cleaning Bella. We heard them switch from the shower to the tub, and Bella's excited squeal as she sank down into the bubble bath. The three 'mamas' argued over who would get to wash her hair, until it was finally agreed that Esme would do the shampoo, Char would do the conditioner, and Rose would dry it and brush it afterward.
"Try to keep the bubbles in the tub, dear," Esme chided Bella lovingly. Bella giggled, and we could hear her deep breaths as she blew on the foam, likely sending clouds of bubbles floating all around. I could feel her pleasure and amazement as she watched them and could picture the expression of curiosity and awe that would be adorning her beautiful face. I happily soaked up the amusement, wonder, and joy of the women as they watched her play and explore her environment.
"Oh, Esme, love the beard!" Char teased. "It's a good look for you."
"Thanks, Char," Esme drawled sarcastically. "Bella, dear, don't you think Char would look good with some bubbles on her face too?"
"Ehs! Buhblhss!" Bella agreed. We heard Char protesting and groaning, and then Rose backing away toward the bathroom door.
"Don't even think about it, munchkin!" Rose warned. "No bubbles for me!"
"No buhblhss for Muhm?"
"That's right," Rose readily agreed. "No bubbles for Mum. And don't bother pouting, because it's not going to work."
Suddenly, we heard the distinct sound of splashing and the splats of water hitting the walls, floor, mirror, and door.
"Bella!" Rose shouted.
Next, all hell broke loose and water could be heard hitting all over the bathroom, including the window, ceiling, counters, toilet, and all the occupants. The three mothers were all busy shouting and shrieking at the laughing girl in the tub, who was highly amused at the chaotic mess she was creating.
"No, Bella! Stop!"
"No splashing! Bella, no!"
"Eek! Stop, stop! Stop splashing, Bella!"
"Ahder! Ahder! Buhblhss! Ehs!"
"The plug, Esme, grab the plug!"
"Grab her arms, keep her still!"
"Hold still, Bella!"
We heard the water start going down the drain. Each of us had put down our cards and were staring up at the ceiling in fascination."Ehs ahder, Mama!" The faucet turned on and then turned off again just as quickly.
"No! No more water!" Esme insisted.
"Mo buhblhss?"
"No! No more bubbles!" Rose declared firmly.
"All done, time to get out, sugar," Char informed her, her tone slightly frustrated. "Time to dry you off and get you dressed in clean clothes."
There were sounds of a brief struggle, some tearing fabric, a few grunts and groans, and a triumphant, "Finally!"
"Motherhood is a lot harder than I thought it would be," Rose admitted. "And a lot messier."
The guys and I could no longer hold ourselves back from satisfying our curiosity, so we raced up the stairs, down the hall, and flung open the bathroom door. The picture that greeted us caused me to immediately break into laughter, though I seemed to be the only one.
Bella was standing there grinning, looking radiant and squeaky clean, sporting a brand new outfit designed to allow for unhindered moment. She skipped over to us and beamed at all of us, love and happiness her primary emotions.
The rest of the women appeared bedraggled, soaked, and exhausted, as if they'd just been put through the wringer. In fact, they looked like drowned rats to me, well, if the rats were beautiful and engaged in a wet t-shirt contest that is. The guys took one look at the clothes plastered to their women's curves like a second skin, grabbed their mates and skedaddled out of sight, throwing off enough lust to choke a camel. I just bounced it right back to them, so it wouldn't affect me and I heard the unmistakable cacophony of things breaking, even in Carlisle's and Esme's room.
I figured that meant it was a good time for Bella and me to get the hell out of range, before she heard things I didn't want to have to explain. 'Well, see, Mama and Daddy are giving each other a 'special hug' without any clothes on because they love each other.' Um, yeah. I wasn't goin' there anytime in the near future. Maybe never.
I grabbed Bella and ran out into the woods, far enough away she wouldn't hear anything and I wouldn't feel anything. She was content being held in my arms, something a normal vampire newborn would never tolerate. I had to admit I was strangely content just having her so close to me as well, though I wasn't sure how much her emotions were affecting my own.
She reached out and grabbed a leaf from a nearby tree as we raced past it. She studied it closely, turning it over and examining it from various angles. She sniffed it and then tasted it, much more cautiously than she had in the past, but still with more curiosity than I've ever had for such mundane objects. I told her everything I knew about that kind of tree, and she listened intently. Having learned what she could from it, she then crumpled it up in her hand and watched the pieces blow away in the wind. Satisfied, she reached out and grabbed a different kind of leaf, repeating the process all over again.
Fascinated to watch her interact with her world and learn about nature, I slowed to a walk and finally placed her down on her own two feet so she could decide for herself which way to go and which objects to investigate next. We spent the next few hours in peaceful companionship as I taught her everything I knew about the local flora and fauna. She didn't make the mistake of tasting any of the insects she found, especially after she squished the first one and recognized the similarities of the smears on her fingers to the remains of the dead fly. As soon as I identified it as a bug, she quickly made the connection to Emmett's revelation and didn't put it anywhere near her mouth. It didn't take long for her to figure out which things classified as 'bugs' and she didn't even bother squishing them after that.
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AN: More to come tomorrow, as the family begins working out roles as to who will teach Bella each of the many things she needs to learn.