Consolation

We laid on the bed. He had his hand o my bare thigh, making me all warm. I had my hand on his chest, drawing designs across it as I showed him how much I loved and missed him.

I'd lost the track of how many 'I'm sorry's ' I'd said. every time I did he kiss me somewhere as an answer. I loved that we didn't need to speak. For me, words weren't enough. Nothing was enough when it came to him. Not even the fact that we could be together forever. I wanted to give him so much more.

What are you thinking? his voice inside my head made me jump, but also send a wave of delight through my body. When I showed him my thoughts did he stiffen around me.

Ness, you don't need to give me anything. You give me everything just by existing. That's all I need. This, having you with me, is just an extremely wonderful bonus.

His words made me smile and I hugged his waist. But there was something more I could give him.

You deserve more, Jake

He sighed Not right now. This is enough.

I lifted my head and reached for his face. My lips placed a kiss on his jaw, then his neck. He shuddered and I kept kissing him. I pulled myself up to him, putting one hand on his neck. Trailing my kisses from his neck to his lips. I kissed him softly

"Ness" he mumbled through the kisses. "Please"

I cant help it my lips never left his I'm weak.

I felt how his lips formed a smile. He put his arm around me and leaned over me. I followed every move.

We kept kissing, soft and gentle, nothing out of range. But I had a really hard time with it. All I wanted was to slung myself over him. But he managed to keep me on track. I had to settle with this. For now.

After a while were we once again just laying on the bed, I laid on his chest and he was playing with my hair.

I was going to ask him something I'd been wanting to ask a long time now, but I didn't want to ruing the moment. And the question was very party crashing.

"Jake?" I asked, trying to sound a bit distracted.

"Mhm"

"Did you find any new tracks?" I said tracing my hand across his arm.

"Of what?"

I rolled my eyes without him seeing "The Volturi"

He automatically locked his arms around me and pulled me closer.

"No" he said coldly

"Kay" I whispered.

He groaned " I swear, if they ever come close to you…" he trailed of, his body started to shake.

I get loose from his grip and grabbed his arm "Baby, calm down" I took his face in my hands "Look, I'm okay. Nothings wrong with me'"

"But what if-"

"But nothing." I kissed him and looked him in the eyes "Jake, you promise me that you'll cut down on the worry and paranoia…" I took his right hand and lifted it up, like if he was going to swear an oath. He just smiled. "You promise me that and I promise that I wont go out without telling you or without company again"

He chuckled and shook his head but I was drop dead serious.

"Promise me!" I said.

"Okay, Promise!" he said laughing. "Where do you get all these things from?" he asked me. I just shrugged. He looked at me. "Oh, I don't think I've told you this" he took a piece of my hair "But I really like the new look. It suits you. But… I don't know, the other one was more Renesmee in some way."

"That's why I cut it. It was to Renesmee Cullen, I'd to embrace Vanessa. Specially if I'm going to high school." he looked at me "But you aren't going to high school right now, it's to late for that."

"I know" I sighed and played with the edge of my sleeping gown.

"by the way, where did you get that from?" he pointed at the sleeping gown.

"Mom got it to me" I said, looking at my hands that where still on the fabric.

"Have Edward seen it?"

I shook my head "She got it for me when I was out"

"You know he'd freak out if he saw it, right?"

I nodded "But he'll never know I wore it" I looked at Jake who had a smudge grin.

"I can't promise you that" he said and I gasped .

"Jacob Black!"

"I'm kidding, he wont" I relaxed "Although, it will take me a while to forget it" he had my favorite smile on his face and I couldn't help but being a bit mean.

"Okay then" I rose up from the bed and ran quickly to Rachel's bedroom and looked the door. He was behind me and knocked on the door.

"Nessie! Nessie, open the door!" he knocked so hard I thought it would break.

"I'm changing!" I yelled back as I searched fore my Capri's and t-shirt mom had bought me.

He groaned "Why are you doing this to me?"

I just laughed.

As soon as I opened the door and entered the living room did he wrap me in his arms and squeezed me. "Jake! I can't breathe!" he responded by kissing my neck. I felt the warmth of his breath and wet of his tongue and I felt how my legs gave in "Not helping" I told him.

"It wasn't supposed to"

He kept kissing me and I leaned my head backwards. He stayed a while by my collarbone before heading up to my neck and he came to my ear. I squeaked when he nibbled my ear and I heard how he moaned. I felt how his mouth came closer to my ear and he whispered "Don't scream"

I was to caught up in the moment to understand.

He then lounged himself backwards and hit the soffa. I didn't scream but I did start to laugh.

We both gave in to hysterical just as the front door opened.

"Guess we're all good, then" Billy said looking at me and Jake where we were laughing on the couch.

"Yes, we are" Jake smiled and looked at me before kissing my temple. All I could do was smile.

Rach didn't come back that night, so I guessed she stayed with Paul. Both Jake and Billy were grumping about it.

I couldn't help but giggle about it at the breakfast table. They were talking how they'd been so out of control lately. When a laugh escaped my lips did they both turn around to look serious at me. I immediately composed myself

"I'm… gonna take a walk." I took my plate to the sink and went out.

It was hot but the clouds were thik and grey. I walked a bit into the forest, not to far away for Jake to frak out. I sat on an old tree trunk looking up to the sky.

"C'mon sun" I said looking at the cloudy sky "I know you're hiding somewhere up there"

I sighed frustrated when it didn't appear.

"Renesmee…"

I turned my head around and looked deep into the forest. I knew that voice well. It was a voice that I once had equaled with comfort, safty and love.

"What do you want?" I said rising from the trunk, he should now I wasn't scared.

"Can we talk?"

I shook my head firmly "I've nothing to say you."

"But I have tones-"

"I don't care." my voice shook but I cleared my throat " You had five years to tell me the truth, five years to tell me about Jake. And you didn't. I forgave you. But I'm afraid of doing that again"

"Baby, you don't have to be afraid of me. I'm your father"

"No you're not" he stopped breathing and so did I "My father would've been completely honest with me, he wouldn't lie. And if he did, he would be man enough to confess it. You haven't done anything of that"

I faced him for the first time as his eyes turned sad.

"That's why I'm here, to apologize…"

"It's to late. You had the opportunities to apologize before, but you didn't take it. And I'm really sorry." I looked at him before turning around "Goodbye Edward"

"Renesmee please!"

No pleading would work on me now. As I'd said, it was to late.

I ran back to the house and burst into tears as soon as I stepped in. Jake was with me in matter of seconds.

"What happened?" his voice filled with worry.

" I… he…" I was sobbing to much to form meanings so I showed him instead.

He growled when I showed him Edward and he hugged me more.

"Everything will be alright, baby. I promise"

I had a hard time believing that.