The Song of Requiem

by umi-sen-yama-sen

Two fated damned souls, who waltz around in an endless requiem melody, spinning in a cycle of death and rebirth— like in a dream, within a dream. [Jack/Lacie story retold but Chilumi]

4. IV: Le retour des rêves oubliés

"So, a worried Cheshire Puss just told me something unusual about the beautiful Alice using Mad Hatter's name as an excuse to avoid a certain cunning fox."

Lumine briefly turned her head at the newcomer, seemingly unbothered with his teasing tone. "Jacques."

"Hello to you too, my dear beloved." Jacques greeted her with a smile as he entered her room without a care in the world, "I noticed my dear Alice is staring off to space most of the time, as if she was thinking something really distant that not even I could reach," he chuckled, "So pray tell, what's going on in that pretty head of yours, hm?"

"Just when did Aether turn himself into a cat?"

"Eh, just now?" He grinned as he sat on the fluffy couch beside her. "Despite his aloof and reticent demeanor, it appears that he has always wanted to flick his tail in your presence just to please his one and only sister."

Lumine frowned for a moment, wondering about the behaviors of some domestic mammals until she responded in return, perplexed. "But...isn't that more like a dog than a cat?

"Hmm, not really. Cats can wag their tails when they're excited sometimes...or when they're mad...Well—whatever, I don't own a cat so I wouldn't know entirely." he shrugged, "But I own a bunny though."

Bunny?

"?" She raised her brow at that, "You do?"

Jacques began to smirk widely, conspiratorially, as he leaned forward closer to her face. "Well…what do you think?"

And to think I even bothered to ask him seriously about it.

"Are you being sarcastic right now, Jacques? Because if you are, I'll sock you in the face."

"Oooohh~ how scaaaaary, this poor man is shaking out of terror." Jacques said dramatically while slumping against her, whereas the side of his face was buried on her chest, and then he quickly wrapped his arms around her hips. "Don't do that, my love; you scare me. Now, please console me."

Despite being irritated by his inane teasing and irritating cheesy remarks, she let him cling to her body—with her other arm wrapped around him, pulling him in. She knew how clingy and affectionate the Alberich head could be at times, that not even she could stop his advances once they began.

When she finally accepted his advances without being repulsed by his touches, their physical intimacy began. She had to admit that it was difficult at first, but his sincerity and genuine care for her and Aether over a decade had been one of the main reasons she eventually gave in and opened up to him.

When she was accepted into the Alberich clan alongside her brother, her upbringing as a Child of Ill Omen was always the reason why he and Gold sometimes clashed verbally, causing him to even joke about his so-called guardian with a flippant remark about her being 'immortal' and a statement of 'you can handle a few more years, so why can't you wait?' whenever their conversation turned to her fated execution. He was even the reason she was able to live until adulthood, despite the fact that raising her and Aether was not a common practice in the household.

Raising and caring for Aether until he reached adulthood was expected (due to her brother being the next-in-line Jacques head in the near future, of course), but Jacques was under no obligation to care for her.

However, the Alberich head continued to do so for some inexplicable reason. He even supported her without reservations.

"Aren't you too old for comfort?" Despite the fact that her mind was in total disarray that morning, she couldn't help but tease him lightly for his clinginess.

He simply hugged her more closer, to the point of smothering his face on her bosom. How clingy, she noted to herself. Lumine was too preoccupied playing with his hair to even mind the gesture.

It was almost natural for them both; for Jacques to seek her out and shower her with love, and for her to receive and reciprocate (by her own way). A common give and take relationship in which neither party expects too much from the other.

Only for comfort and companionship, nothing more. Or well…a bit more than that? But who knows?

"Is there anything wrong if I want it from my favorite person?" he murmured.

She let out a wry chuckle, "I wonder how many times you've said that to another woman besides me."

"Hey, that's a nasty accusation. Do you really think anyone could surpass your beauty? Because I really don't think they could." Jacques groaned, "Y'know that you're the only woman I've got my eye on, mon lapin."

Lumine smiled a bit, humoring him as she continued to play with his hair. "As you should."

"Can you now tell me why you are avoiding your only friend?"

"I just need a break from him, that's all." She said, half-truth and half-lie. There was no way she was going to admit that Ajax was the reason her mind had been in shambles for the past few weeks, causing her emotions to be all over the place and probably affecting those around her, particularly Jacques and Aether. The Krovopuskov scion was only making things more difficult for her, making her question a lot of things about how she perceives everything in life.

And those strange feelings she was having while thinking about him with a woman, which gave her that foreign urge of possessiveness and jealousy—which was sinking through her bones like a festering curse, or as if it was her karmic retribution for her aversion to romantic love.

Feeling those complex emotions is only linked to one thing—

(In which both intimidated and confused her beyond belief.)

—To like. To be fond of. It could also be a sign of affection, but she only shook her head inwardly as she thought about how ridiculous it was.

That was not possible. She couldn't even tell herself if she was capable of romantic love. Apart from making her brother happy, she doesn't really require anything. What nonsense.

"Hmm, that sounds really unconvincing."

"Well...sorry to say, but I'm not really obligated to tell you," she retorted sarcastically.

He laughed almost dryly. "Haha, of course."

She responded with a hmph.

"But, seriously..."

Lumine looked at him from the corner of her eye, clearly annoyed. "What?"

"It's obvious you were thinking about that lad, or should I say..." He hummed as he adjusted his head on her bosom, facing her. "You spend far too much time thinking about him."

She froze imperceptibly.

"Of course not," she denied instantly.

"Is that so?"

She sighed and tried to pry him away from her, but he only tightened his grip. "Jacques, I swear if you—"

Huh?

Before she could even finish her sentence, Jacques only leaned forward to her— with his face just a hair's breadth away from hers. Surprised and speechless, Lumine could only lean back further against the couch, with him following her motion until he barred his arms on each side of her face, successfully stopping her from moving away.

"If I have to be honest, it actually annoys me a little." He murmured against her lips, and she was too stunned to move or make any noise under him, "How could you think of another man in my presence, mon lapin?"

She opened and closed her mouth several times before responding, "No, just what are you talking about—"

"It's disheartening, you know," Jacques cut her out again and smirked, but not in his usual playful manner, which she thought was unusual. His expression was solemn, and his single sapphire orb was bright and sharp. He was looking at her differently; there was something in his eyes that she couldn't place.

And she had no idea what it was either.

After a few moments of staring into each other's eyes, his unusual expression vanished in an instant, replaced by a tired expression. Jacques' sigh filled her ears, and his hot breath hit the side of her face until he decided to slump against her.

She blinked.

Just what was that?

"Nevermind that," he said, as if he could hear her confused thoughts, and kissed her on the cheek. "I'm just here to let you know that I'll be gone for a couple of days; Aether will be back from his mission tomorrow, and I'm giving him a three-days worth of day off." Jacques simply pulled away and adjusted his clothes more presentably. "Spend some quality time with your brother, I'm sure you missed him."

"..."

"And also, you can't avoid that lad forever." He turned around and began to walk away, saying, "If you don't want to see him anymore, just tell him the truth; it will save you a lot of trouble."

---

Her brother arrived home the next day, exactly as Jacques had promised. While it made her truly happy that she could finally have her brother's undivided attention for three days (after all, Aether has been so busy for the past few weeks that she hasn't had anyone to talk to), seeing Aether's solemn expression while presenting an opened envelope made her frown and be wary at the same time.

"What's that?"

"A letter."

She raised a brow at that and pushed on, "And?"

"It was Ajax's letter," Aether murmured.

Oh.

"Was it addressed to you?" She asked him in which he nodded wordlessly, then she frowned. "Then why are you giving it to me?"

"It's…" he trailed off for a moment, as he floundered for an answer.

"Look," Lumine crossed her arms, glaring at the envelope with obvious annoyance. "I'm not really sure why you are giving me a letter that wasn't addressed to me, brother," she said, "but I don't need to read that."

"You won't?" Her brother only blinked as he drew his arm back, hiding the envelope back through his vest. "I see. My bad. So you're going to avoid him for a long time? If so, should I come up with another excuse?"

"Another excuse"?

Bewildered, she couldn't help but ask, "Why? Did he say something in the letter?"

Aether scratched his cheek, "He was asking me when he'd be able to visit this place, and I don't really know what to answer back, which is why I wanted to consult you about it."

What? Ajax really said that?

She frowned, "But that didn't stop him from visiting before, so what gives?"

"Well…"

"Brother, if you want to tell me something—just tell me," she sighed.

"I'm sorry, it's just that... I noticed you're obviously avoiding Ajax, and I don't want to see you get even more upset because of him, Lumine. To be honest, I was thinking about cutting ties with him if you don't want to see him anymore."

What…?

"Wait—" Everything seemed so sudden for her, that even her thoughts regarding the subject also lagged as well. Aether appeared serious when he said that, but Lumine could tell by the worried creases on his brows and the small purse of his lips that her brother was clearly affected by the whole situation with her and Ajax.

To be honest, she thought it was her fault. In fact, Ajax did nothing wrong (she bet he doesn't even realize she was avoiding him and giving him the cold shoulder, especially during their last meeting).

So what if he has a slew of women on his side? So what if he messes around with women in his spare time? Sure enough, it shouldn't be her problem, nor should she fuss about it every damn single time in her private moments.

But alas, everything just happened in a beat. It simply agonized her to think about it, but she couldn't ignore the fact that she was the problem all along. She just couldn't take it…. the thought of Ajax with a woman doesn't sit well with her— it made her feel depressed and inexplicably angry. The offensive marks that she always saw on his person, the vexing scent that she had to endure to breathe in his presence, his lies, his smiles, his obvious adoration for her, his smoldering look that he always wore when she wasn't looking at him but she could feel his scorching gaze all the same….

All of it. Everything about him was frustrating. Everything about him suffocated her, as did her complicated feelings for him.

Feelings. Feelings. Does this imply she liked Ajax?

No, she inwardly shook her head, that's pretty unlikely. It's impossible.

Then why are you getting worked up with something such as him with a woman?

How would I know?

Lies. You knew the answer all along, and all you wanted to do was deny it, however ineptly.

That, she couldn't stop the grimace from appearing on her face.

"You know you can't avoid him forever, right?" Lumine blinked as she awoke from her trance, seeing Aether's concerned expression in front of her.

He was right, her brother and Jacques were right. She can't keep avoiding Ajax and putting up with her chaotic emotions for much longer.

She had to move on in order to progress. She couldn't figure out why she was getting so worked up about things she didn't even care about before.

All she could think about was how he was the source of everything, how everything seemed to change because of him.

Ajax, the third son of Viscount Nikolai, the scion of the House of Krovopuskov—a beautiful, cunning, bright individual who can charm anyone with a single smile.

It was all because of him.

"I'm sorry," was the only thing she could offer to her brother at that moment, which drew her a surprised look from him.

"What are you apologizing for?"

"You're right, I can't ignore Ajax any longer; just tell him he can come whenever he wants."

"Are you…are you even sure?"

"When I am not?" she snorted, "And also, it's been a month since we last saw him, and I've noticed it's far too gloomy here. Who knows, this manor will brighten once more if he visits."

"Lumine…"

"Just do it, brother. I promise, I don't mind, and I'd like to see him as well," she smiled sweetly for good measure (to make it believable) and said a lie that tasted like poison to her tongue. "Everything is fine."

"Well, if you say so, then I'll write him a response right away."

"Then I'll bid you farewell for the meantime. I'm sleepy and I wish to nap." Lumine murmured as she turned around with a wave, "Let's catch up and talk about your day later."

"Of course," he nodded and smiled, "Rest well, sister."

"And you too."

.

.

.

.

As she finally came out of the manor's right wing, she couldn't stop massaging her throbbing temples and let out a long, exaggerated shaky sigh out of her lips.

Lying had always come naturally to her, like breathing. A natural talent for deceiving those around her, especially when it meant lying for the greater good or just for fun (it wholly depends). But lying in front of her own brother's face felt difficult back then. She was tempted to tell the truth about how unprepared she was to see Ajax in flesh sooner.

Should she go back and tell Aether to cancel it out? It's not too late yet, she reasoned inwardly. Lumine could just bolt right back inside the manor and seek her brother, and confess about her real feelings regarding the matter.

However, she was also aware that prolonging her aversion towards the Krovopuskov scion would do her no good either.

Then…

"Ugh," she let out a pained groan, her face buried in her palms as she agonized over her situation.

Would she really be alright with it? By seeing him once again?

Well, she could just try and see it out for herself.

---

Her eyes were already closing, and her knees were buckling with each step against the thick snow.

"Brother... I'm so tired..."

A pause. Golden orbs scanned her face, worried but determined.

"Please don't close your eyes yet," Ten year old Aether replied, trying to sound reassuring as he gently drew her behind him. "Just a little bit more, Lumi."

She sneezed and nodded. She will try to endure again, for another hour.

"...okay..." she mumbled.

Lumine could only follow her brother's repetitive encouragement, albeit sluggishly and somewhat on autopilot, despite being famished and deadbeat tired for the entire day. She had to admit that it was difficult to drag her feet through the thick snow, but it was her first time seeing her brother act in such a way that she couldn't even bring herself to be whiney in his presence.

She must persevere for the sake of her dear older brother.

"It's almost there, I can see it clearly," Her brother said as he hurried his steps, almost making her stumble with her boot, "we're getting closer to the mansion, just a few more walks and we'll be there."

She sneezed again, and her other hand reached for the worn wool scarf that hung around her neck.

Before she could even ponder lethargically about mansions and noblemen living in luxury, Aether seemed to pull her even more, and she had no choice but to be dragged along with it.

"..."

"It's there, Lumi! Look!"

Despite the sleepiness that was pulling on her eyelids, Lumine forced herself to blink, which made her check over the place in front of her with mild curiosity.

What she could see were massive gates looming over them, with a certain family emblem embedded on the thick metal bars—imposing and looking so mighty. The more she stared, the more perplexed she became. She had no idea whose noble house it was, but she was certain that the droplets of light she and her brother had seen had come from there.

Their next step must be to go inside, to seek the lord of the manor himself.

"It's calling me in," Aether said in a daze, "Is it calling you too?" she nodded in response, "Then we should come closer. Quick."

Wordlessly, she heeded his words and followed, but before they could get any closer, a large man wrapped in a heavy cloak appeared behind the gates, abruptly stopping them.

"Stop right there!" His tone was downright threatening and brusque, it almost made her cower behind her older brother. He sounded so scary. "Kids, this place is not a playground. Go back to your parents!"

Instead of being frightened, her brother responded with a polite bow. "Hello, we apologize for arriving unannounced, but we're just commoners, and I'd like to see the lord of this—"

"No, just scram. This place isn't for kids, now turn around and leave."

But Aether politely pressed more, much to the cloak man's visible annoyance. "But Monsieur, please hear my request, it's really important. Can you please call the lord of this mansion? I really need to talk to him."

"Heh, aren't you so persistent? Leave before I commit something atrocious."

"B-brother…" she stuttered anxiously as she tugged on Aether's hand, "We should go. He might do something bad, he's scary…"

"No, Lumi." Aether said with conviction, stopping her. He held his ground, his grip on her hand firm enough to keep her in place. "We just made an effort to come here, and there's no way we're backing out."

"But brother—"

"What a bothersome kid, and why do you think I'd let you into the mansion, huh, you runt?"

"Because I have something important."

"What a brazen response, and far too cocky for someone as defenseless as a bag of bones. Well, kid, I'm sorry to break it to you, but…"

"We've seen droplets of light coming from this mansion, and it's been calling us since yesterday. So are you telling me I should ignore such things?"

"What?" Absolute disbelief filled the cloaked man's face as he stared at her and her brother as if they both sprouted three heads. Lumine just thought he looked so comical with his reaction.

Why did he look so surprised? Is there anything special about these so-called "droplets of light"?

He spluttered, "Y-you are— don't tell me!"

"Hey, you're too noisy for a newbie. Your voice was so loud that I could hear it from afar. Do you want me to fire you?" A beautiful individual appeared behind the cloaked man, with arms crossed over his chest. "And why are you flashing your weapon in front of my gates? Is there an invisible enemy?"

"...!" The cloaked man turned around instantly to greet the newcomer with an exaggerated bow, "Lord Jacques! My deepest apologies, some rowdy kids were attempting to enter the gates and it just so happened that the other kid was really pushy, so I had no choice but to scare them just to get them to leave."

Aether rebutted with a childish frown adorning his face, "Lies, we didn't 'attempt to enter the gates', I told you that I had something important, and I asked you nicely for the lord of this mansion because I wanted to talk to him. But instead of listening to us, you only wish to chase us out."

"I-I—that—Lord Jacques, I can expla—"

'Lord Jacques' only eyed the man with a raised brow until he shifted his single gaze to her brother and her. "Well, well… And what do we have here, hm?"

"My name is Aether, milord. And this is my younger sister Lumine. I only wish to talk to you."

"It's rare to see a child look back at me with those kind of unwavering eyes," He said with a hum as he walked closer to the gates to see both of them more closely, "You're very straightforward and brave, I like that in a person."

"Thank you."

"So, young Aether, I am the head of this mansion, and the name's Jacques. So, what makes a young, bright child like you want to talk to me?"

Aether's grip on her hand tightened briefly, and she only squeezed his hand back to encourage him. "The droplets of light were calling us the moment we woke up yesterday, and it just led us here, along with my sister. My dreams are also telling me about—"

"You," Jacques only called out to the silent cloaked man, the order was sudden, cold and serious. "If you want to save face, this is your chance. Open the gates right at this instant."

Flabbergasted, the man could only heed his abrupt order, albeit frantically. "Y-yes!"

While the cloaked man was busy opening the large gates for them, the Lord took advantage of the opportunity to inspect them until his single eye fell upon her. She immediately froze, his gaze searing through her skin like a laser. The weight of his gaze was so heavy that it was almost impossible for her to move, let alone breathe.

She had to admit that his piercing stare was making her extremely uncomfortable. It was as if he was unabashedly peering into her soul.

It was scary. The gaze just reminded her of—

"Red….! The eyes of a devil! A disgrace! You're a Child of Ill Omen!"

"...!" She flinched, somewhat taken aback by an unwelcome memory that had suddenly sprung to mind.

Aether squeezed her hand, worriedly. "Lumine…?"

She simply bowed her head even more. Lumine couldn't let anyone see the color of her eyes, not even the beautiful head of the manor himself.

"Your sister... Lumine is it?" he asked softly, in stark contrast to the commanding tone he used with the cloaked man. "I can see she's very tired. Have you both eaten yet?"

Her brother shook his head in response, "I'm afraid we still haven't, milord."

Jacques turned around and began to walk all the way back to the mansion, "Then come with me inside, both of you. Let's talk about this matter in a safer place where no other ears could hear."

.

.

.

.

.

---

"You're dreaming again."

She awoke with a jolt, which had become a regular occurrence for her in recent months, with her dreams of the past haunting her even while she slept. Her memories were completely harmless, but having them play back in her head almost every day didn't seem normal in her opinion.

Everything was repetitive, as if she were watching a long strip of movie in her head, forcing her to recall long-forgotten memories from her past. It was full of childlike innocence with her brother, where they always smiled and laughed at whatever they saw or just played to their hearts' content.

That momentous experience lasted until they experienced their first heartbreak and trauma when both of their parents died right in front of them. And secondly, the first sense of betrayal they felt when no one bothered to help their family because of her upbringing as a child of misfortune.

And then third but surely not the least: acceptance, when they both realized that they had no one else anymore but each other. "Trust no one," her brother had once said, and it had become their life motto when they were children, trying their hardest to survive as they wandered aimlessly for weeks, if not months.

"Lumine, are you alright?" A familiar voice asked, causing her to turn her head and be greeted by her brother's worried expression.

"Brother..." she murmured.

She hadn't noticed him all along, which was a little concerning. For some reason, her dreams terrified her; they felt too real, as if she had time traveled back in time.

"You appear to be in shock. Are you having a nightmare?"

"Don't worry, I'm just dreaming of the past," she said as she shook her head.

"I see..." Aether hummed as he crossed the room and approached her bed, "My apologies for keeping you late last night, I simply didn't notice the time."

"Silly, I don't mind at all. I wouldn't mind talking with you all day, you know that."

He smiled, "Right."

"So, what brings you here?"

"Ah, I know I came pretty early this morning, but a messenger just came and announced Ajax would visit our manor today."

She wordlessly eyed the clock in her room. It's still seven in the morning, she noted. "What time?"

"At noon," He confirmed with a cross of his arm, eyeing her. "Will you be okay?"

She let out a laugh, albeit sarcastically. "What kind of question is that? Of course, I am, brother."

Her brother only stared at her, mildly scrutinizing, and she had to say the sight somehow made her a little bit uncomfortable. "What…?" she asked, wary.

"While it has endeared me to see you growing up as a fine lady..." He paused for a moment before continuing, "How I wish you could be honest with me with your true sentiments sometimes," Aether said with a small smile.

She fell silent for a moment before responding, "...but I am..?"

"Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying this to get you to open up to me right away. Not at all." Her brother quickly interjected, "I'm always fine just looking at you, trying to understand you in whatever may be, but Lumine," he sat on the side of her bed, and his large hand found its way to her cheek, tenderly cupping it. "You know I'm always here for you. If you're happy, you can be happy. If you're mad, you can be mad. If you're sad, you can be sad. If you feel lonely…" he paused and Lumine could only wait with bated breath for his next words until he smiled in his understanding, brotherly way. "...don't be ashamed of it. You don't have to keep everything hidden, especially from me."

To feel lonely…?

"I can read you like an open book. I know there's a lot going on in your mind, but I don't want to ask about it unless you're ready to tell me." He gently caressed her cheek with his thumb, "If something bothers you, then you must reject anything that connects to that. It's not too late yet, Lumine. Just give me the word, and I'll cancel his supposed visit immediately."

She froze.

"Brother, you know you can't do that…"

"And why not?"

"Ajax is also your friend," she reasoned, "And most importantly, I'm sure that he's also looking forward to seeing you every time he visits our manor."

Now that she thinks about it, her brother has never had any friends in his life. He, like her, chose a life of seclusion, whereas his ultimate goal is to succeed Jacques; to be the next head of the House of Alberich. He trained on his own and spent all of his free time with her, nothing more.

But his words right then… there was no way that she considered herself being lonely. In all honesty, she hasn't given it much thought. She still had Jacques, her brother, her chain... and even the Core, with whom she hadn't spoken to in months.

She had to admit that she was indeed confused with her tumultuous feelings for a certain man, but she never considered herself to be lonely.

She was absolutely far from it. Not at all.

"That's not tru—"

"Enough of this talk about me," she cut him off as she reached out to squeeze his hand on her cheek. "You know that your words just now could extend to you as well, my dear brother."

It was Aether's turn to be speechless this time, and she smiled.

My time is already running and perhaps my death is near. Well, who knows, she mused to herself with an inward shake of her head. Seeing my dreams signalling my impending death in the near future is already an indication, however, I shouldn't be too dramatic about these things.

"Instead of focusing on me, you should focus on yourself instead. I'm capable, brother. I can fend for myself, and I can decide on my own as well."

You can't be any more lonelier when I leave this world.

Lumine squeezed his hand on her cheek even more as she leaned forward to his touch as if she was deprived.

He deserves a lot more than me.

"But thank you so much for being so concerned for my well being, brother." She said as she kissed his palm and smiled teasingly, "You should show this side to Jacques sometimes."

He grumbled, "Never."

She laughed.

Oh dear brother, you deserve everything, you deserve the whole world.

And Ajax, she couldn't help but think about the man once more. She knew her brother would definitely need someone like him to be on his side. A friend to her brother, someone who could support Aether no matter what happened.

"If that's the case…" she murmured to herself.

Then I shouldn't ignore him anymore.

"?" Aether tilted his head to the side, watching her. "Lumine?"

Now finally decided on her musings, she only shook her head and smiled. "It's nothing. Have you eaten yet? Because if you haven't, then we should eat breakfast together."

---

No matter how much she insisted that she was fine and ready to face Ajax, she couldn't really ignore the fact that she was being tense and uneasy in his presence. While she was pretty confident in her pretending skills, it was a completely different story when the person she had to fool had the ability to make her feel all uncomfortable and jittery in a matter of minutes; something that Lumine had to agonize over as she realized how troublesome it could be.

"I hope I didn't bother you today," Ajax said and Lumine could only watch him as he did a small bow of his head, "It's been awhile and I just wanted to see you in person again. I hope you don't mind."

"Not at all, I can assure you that." Lumine replied with a wave of her hand, somewhat weirded by his polite gesture. "That's enough."

Now that he was no longer bowing his head, Ajax decided to move next to her and she swore the simple gesture had almost surprised her (and had to force herself not to flinch at his closeness).

"How was your trip with the lord?" He asked, seemingly curious.

Relax, Lumine.

"It was fine," she answered.

"I see, then I'm glad." Ajax smiled at her, in which she tried her very best to return (even though it felt difficult for her facial muscles to do the trick). "Tell me about your vacation."

And she did, just exactly what she had practiced a gazillion times in her head for the past few days.

Somehow, lying to him about how much she enjoyed her month away with Jacques seemed like a huge, burdensome effort. Everything seemed forced, and her lies didn't feel real, let alone credible, with her frequent pauses whenever he asked a question.

But, despite the fact that everything seemed forced to her, Ajax continued to listen. In fact, he was almost too focused on her every time she spoke, as if her words alone took precedence over everything else.

And his eyes, it was very unnerving to feel those on her. So dark and lifeless, grave and inexpressive. It was as if he could sense her lies and the unnecessary bullshit she spewed from the very beginning, but was far too entertained to even consider cutting her off with her deception.

"Well, that's all," she finished her retelling with a small sigh, "And also, I'm sorry. I forgot to buy you any souvenirs."

"It looks like you enjoyed your vacation a lot, I'm glad. You deserve to have fun, you withdraw yourself too much." He smiled, "And no, please don't fret about not bringing me any souvenirs from your trip, Lumine. I really don't mind, honestly."

She only nodded in understanding as well as gratitude, "But what about you?"

"Hm?" he tilted his head to the side, bewildered. "What do you mean?"

"What have you been up to in the last month? Anything remarkable happened?"

"Ah," Ajax lagged for a second, whereas his eyes wandered for a bit as he thought for an answer. "My father was just pushing me more to learn everything about how to be an heir from the bottom up to the top. It was nothing new, he's just whipping me to be a perfect successor."

"That sounds really taxing."

"It certainly does, but there's nothing I can do really." He shrugged, "My brothers aren't even fit for the title, they're too shallow and easily manipulated," he explained and continued, "which is why I've been chosen to lead the family to prevent the house from crumbling due to an incompetent successor."

"No wonder," she hummed, "you're smart and all, and you're definitely fit for the job."

He only laughed, and Lumine had to admit she had somehow missed how he expressed his mirth. "I don't think so. I hardly ever think about myself in such a way; you know, I was always hopeless, and I believe I still am."

She frowned because that didn't sound right. "What are you talking about? You've got everything you could want, don't you?"

"Haha. Everything, you say?"

And this time, Ajax seemed to look at her more intently, as if he was trying to carve his gaze on her—dull eyes scorching and bewitching—smiling in a way that both weirded and made her feel a lot of things unimaginable within her.

It was extremely frustrating not knowing the underlying meaning behind them, but even if she did, she didn't think she would be able to accept them for some reasons that shouldn't be mentioned nor be named.

"There…" He murmured in low tones, but Lumine heightened her hearing senses to pick up on his words more clearly. "...Perhaps it doesn't appear that way to others, but I have something I've wanted for a long time."

"..." She remained silent, her mind flying elsewhere thinking about what he had said.

Something that he wants…

And what would that be?

"Do you have something that you want as well?" It was his turn to ask her, which made her halt from her steps, mildly taken aback. "Something that you wanted so badly, something you wish to own, something that makes you outright crazy?"

Something that she wanted? Does she even have one?

"..."

Unbidden, Ajax's familiar face suddenly came to mind like a restless soul trying to haunt someone even in their dreams.

(The hair that was reminiscent of the color of a beautiful orange sunset, a chiseled patrician features with pairs of dark stormy, cobalt-hued eyes that seemed to hold a lot of secrets within.)

(His gentle smile and laughs, his deep yet friendly voice calling out her name with full of warmth and adoration seeping through the two syllables.)

She clenched her fists on her side. Her chest felt a sudden small pressure that was both annoying and constricting.

The usual heavy feeling that she had to endure at times returned, but this time it filled her with dread.

No, it couldn't be..

His familiar face appeared brimming with unadulterated happiness.

"Lumine! Lumine!"

And now with an excited smile…

"Lumine! I finally found you!"

…full of awe and adoration…

"Lumine! You're so beautiful!"

…full of amazement along with the beautiful boyish laugh…

"Haha, Lumine, you're amazing!"

…then calling her name with relief…

"Lumine!"

And last but not the least, his familiar face, wearing the most fondest look— grinning from ear to ear.

"...Lumine!"

All of it was just too much for her to bear. She couldn't think any longer; she was completely overwhelmed.

Make it stop…

Her hands felt shaking.

Seeing that she stopped on her tracks, Ajax did the same and watched her, obviously confused. "Lumine…?"

Just….stop calling my name!

He moved closer to her, "Are you okay..?"

She looked down as she let out a shaky sigh, still overwhelmed. "No."

Already concerned by her statement, he leaned forward to see her up close and touch her when she suddenly…

"What? Are you sick—?"

"Stop," she cut him off almost sharply and coldly, pulling away from him as if he had burned her. The man simply froze behind her, speechless, but Lumine was far too preoccupied with her uncontrollable emotions; whereas her mind and feelings were in complete chaos to even care about how she shut him off at that moment. The desire to flee was almost overwhelming, she desired to go somewhere where she could be alone and at peace in order to protect any semblance of sanity that remained on her. Everything was just so—

"I'm…sorry." Ajax murmured and repeated, "Lumine, I'm sorry."

He sounds so dejected.

(Which it almost reminded her of his emaciated younger self who didn't have any scrap of will to live in him, and was drowning himself in pure self-loathing.)

And why the hell was he apologizing at this moment?

Lumine suddenly felt bad for snapping, "No, this is—" and tried to calm herself down, and had managed to do so for a little bit but not completely. She slowly took a deep breath, trying to regulate her laborious breathing. "No, no—it should have been me to apologize. That was being rude of me, I'm sorry."

This is bad, I was being harsh to him.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Y-yes, what is it?"

"Have I done something that makes you want to avoid me?"

Her entire body went stiff and cold, as if she had been doused in a large bucket full of ice water from head to toe.

He continued, "Have I done something that made you feel disgusted?"

Her traitorous thoughts went back to the scent of freesias, to the lipstick stain on his neck and the pretentious hickey, and Lumine swore she'd never felt so ashamed of herself until that day.

It was obvious all along, with the way she acted, her cold behavior in regarding those evidences that she saw in him that connects him to another woman.

She didn't want to admit it, but it made her feel disgusted in a bit—

—despite the fact that she knew she had no right to feel that way.

No, I'm not disgusted with Ajax, never will I be, she reasoned inwardly as she tried to reassure herself. I was only disgusted by the idea of another woman marking him as if he were hers—

Ajax was his own person, and she was aware of it. He could certainly do whatever he wanted without seeking approval or caring about the opinions of others, including her.

Just admit it.

—No, no… This doesn't make sense. I don't know anymore…!

As she agonized about the torment her feelings did to her mind, Lumine suddenly saw herself in a place so dark—the Abyss—aloneby herself, huddling in the center like a ball with her hands covered on her ears. It was dark and cold, and she couldn't even feel the Core nearby, making her truly feel lonely and anxious.

The place was simply barren.

Then, like a mellow coronach on someone's death bed, a tune from an eerie musical box began to play in the background, accompanied by her familiar voice.

"Jealousy is an ugly emotion. It breeds suspicion, doubt, and mistrust, which can snowball into pretty intense emotions and behaviors."

She was so ashamed. Very so ashamed. And she didn't think she had it herself to admit it right in front of him.

(Jealousy is such a disgusting feeling, so rotten and execrable.)

And Lumine had no choice but to lie to his face, once more. "...Of course not. What possessed you to say such a thing?"

Silence.

"Disgusted? What nonsense. And pray tell, why would I even avoid you?" She finished with a question of her own, "Just for what reason anyway?"

"I see, then I guess it's safe to say I'm just overthinking things," he trailed, "right, Lumine?"

"You are indeed overthinking things yourself, Ajax, and there's no way I would—"

"If that's the case, then why can't you look at me?"

That's totally unfair.

It took her a couple of seconds to respond as she looked away for a bit, "...Does it make a difference whether I look at you or not?"

"..."

"..."

Another moment of silence, and the agony it brought was almost painful. Her lies felt like a poisonous toxic substance slowly killing her from within, rotting her from inside and out.

She wanted to flee, just for the meantime to calm herself down. She thought she needed some air, the place was already stuffy anyway.

Lumine took a single step forward—

He suddenly said, "If you can't look at me, then can I be near you?"

—and stopped.

What?

"I have a feeling you're avoiding me on purpose, but I don't want to force you to tell me everything, so I'd never try, not against your will."

"Then it's a good thing you're sensible. It would save a lot of trouble in the future, I guess."

"Can I hold you?"

Now seemingly irritated about almost everything, Lumine replied in return in a brusquely manner, not clearly getting his message. "Do whatever you want—"

Suddenly, she was pulled into a tight hug by the man from behind, his strong arms protectively encasing her and his familiar overwhelming scent of roses hitting her senses like a tidal wave. Ajax hugged her closer to him, her back hitting his chest with a soft thump and her exposed cold shoulders against the soft cloth of his coat now felt warm. It was just too sudden, but Lumine didn't think she still had the energy to pull away from his grasp.

Half of her mind was telling her that she shouldn't indulge herself, while the remaining half was craving for it.

Her hidden desire to be smothered by his presence was overpowering her already muddled senses. Lumine was far too weak to push him away, she simply just couldn't.

Just…this once, I guess.

(Both of them were in the middle of the stairs of her tower, all alone and breathing the same air with their hearts almost beating as one.)

Ajax let out a shaky sigh, his hot breath hitting the side of her face which made her shiver. "I'm so sorry if I did something that made you avoid me, I'm also sorry if I angered you in some way…" he said as he hugged her more closer to the point of squeezing her small frame against his, his face was now buried on the crook of her neck. "Just…just please, don't avoid me."

Don't avoid me

His words only pulled at her heartstrings, he sounded so vulnerable and weak. The usual jovial tone he uses most of the time was nowhere to be found, and was replaced by some kind of gloominess that even she wasn't accustomed to.

"Don't be. You didn't do anything wrong," she said softly as she finally relaxed herself in his embrace, "I just needed time for myself, that's all."

Squeeze

"But still, I'm sorry." He murmured, almost begging. "Don't avoid me."

Lumine simply closed her eyes and let him continuously cling to her; and he did, as if she was his only lifeline. "I won't."

They stayed like that for a few minutes, sharing warmth and comfort, with Ajax frequently nuzzling his face on her hair as if he couldn't get enough of her. The position they were in was far too intimate, she thought, but Lumine didn't mind because no one else could see them in that way anyway.

Not until a familiar voice came in, his deep voice had surprised them both, making her open her eyes instantly (with Ajax releasing her in a beat), snapping them immediately in their intimate bubble.

"Oh, what's this? Did I interrupt something?"

As she stepped away from the Krovopuskov scion, she could only look wide-eyed at the mildly surprised and intrigued newcomer. "Jacques."

"Hello, mon bien-aimé." Jacques greeted with a smile, his single eye crinkling into a half-moon.

"You returned early," Despite the fact that her heart was racing from being caught so quickly, she quickly composed herself and pretended as if nothing had happened. "Have you finished your work?"

"Not really. I just forgot an important document in my office and had to quickly retrieve it; luckily, our rendezvous is in the capital this time, so it's not too much of a hassle."

"I see, that's good, it's less taxing," she said, adding, "So, what brings you here? Are you looking for me?"

"Of course. Y'know I always am," He chuckled, patting her head, but then he turned his gaze behind her, clearly eyeing the silent man who was already staring back at him wordlessly. "I had no idea he was coming to visit today; it's good to see you again, Ajax."

"I apologize for not informing you sooner."

"Oh no," Jacques said with a flippant wave of his hand, laughing. "Don't apologize; you're a friend to Lumine and Aether, and I was the one who always encouraged you to visit them whenever you wanted, so you don't have to be polite with me."

"Thank you for being so kind as always, Lord Alberich," he bowed his head.

"Non! How many times do I have to tell you to just call me "Jacques"? Seriously, Ajax, I was hoping we'd ditch the formalities and start calling each other by names. We're friends, aren't we?"

"I'm still...not used to it, but I'll try...Lord Jacques."

"Remove the 'lord' and we're good to go, geez you're too formal."

"Yes, Jacques."

"See? It's not hard, right? Then you must start calling me that from now on, Ajax." The Alberich head grinned. "Hmm, now so where were we? Ah, yes, I came here to see you before I leave again, mon lapin."

"...?" She only blinked as she raised her head to face him.

Jacques then held her face tenderly, his long fingers buried in her hair, his thumb drawing circles in her lower lip. Lumine was perplexed by his gesture; but it wasn't until he leaned in closer to hers that she finally realized what the clan head was planning to do.

He had intended to kiss her in front of Ajax, and he did so boldly.

His warm lips touched hers in a tender manner and she was left rooted in her position, surprised and mildly mortified.

Just what was going on? Jacques was far from amorous, especially when they weren't alone. He can be clingy in public at times, yes, but he never pulled a stunt such as kissing her on the lips when someone was looking.

He gently bit her lower lip, eliciting a soft gasp from her and he simply deepened the kiss. Lumine was too surprised and overwhelmed to even reject his advances, not when his hand was firm on her cheek. His kiss has a certain weight to it, a bit forceful and passionate, demanding that she accept it in submission, which she did without stopping him at once—but never reciprocating.

Just what the hell was happening anyway? Everything was all too sudden.

If Jacques extended the kiss for a full minute, she would most likely panic. Lumine was rational enough not to forget about the other person watching them like a hawk from behind. So with a gentle push of her hand on his chest, the Alberich head finally released her, but he suddenly pulled her into a hug; his other arm all wrapped around her shoulder, almost possessively.

"J-Jacques…?" she stuttered as she clutched on his coat, "What was that for—"

"Shhh," he cut her off with a chuckle and planted another kiss on her temple, "I just need my three days' worth of kisses from you; it's still not enough, but I can manage."

Is he literally nuts or something? How preposterous!

Her cheeks turned bright red as she smacked him across the chest. "Stop sounding like a pervert!"

"Hahaha! Ow, stop hitting me. Oh well…"

She felt him move his arm, drawing her closer to his much larger frame. "...I guess my advice didn't work, huh?" he whispered.

She frowned and muttered. "What do you mean?"

"What do you think, hm?"

She felt him smirk, and she couldn't help but freeze in his embrace, remembering his last words from three days ago.

"If you don't want to see him anymore, just tell him the truth; it will save you a lot of trouble."

No, she couldn't, it wasn't that simple. It was difficult to be open about it, let alone to Ajax.

Jacques somehow understood her silence because he simply smiled and released her, but he didn't distance himself as much and continued to stay in her personal space.

But then a few moments later, the place suddenly felt odd to her. The ambiance surely turned different this time, it was as if the place was filled with unknown pressure that was both stuffy and suffocating.

She was familiar with that kind of atmosphere. In fact, as a child of misfortune, she was used to such ambiance being reflected on her wherever she went in public without any disguise on.

She'd never mistake it for anything else. It was no doubt an aura of pure hostility.

But why in her tower of all places?

"I know it's late, but I have to apologize for disrupting your quality time together as friends. I didn't expect Ajax to visit today, if only I had known, I wouldn't even bother coming here knowing it will ruin your fun," Jacques said, his gaze fixed on the unusually silent Ajax.

She turned on her side to see them both looking at each other, while she stood right in the middle of them, like a spectator. Ajax remained as impassive as ever, but a few moments later, he responded with his usual kind smile.

"Not at all, no one has been disturbed."

"I see, then I'm relieved to hear that."

Was it just her feeling, or was there something else going on between them? The atmosphere was becoming increasingly dense.

Jacques patted her head, jolting her out of her reverie. "I'll be going on now. I'm leaving my dear rabbit in your care, Ajax."

She retorted in absolute disagreement, "I'm not a child!"

"Haha, of course you aren't; I couldn't kiss you like that if you were, could I?" He grinned cheekily.

This conniving clown…..!

"Don't wait until I kick your ass down these stairs, and when I do, I just hope you break your old bones, Jacques."

"Hahahahaha! How frightening!" He laughed merrily then turned his gaze back to Ajax, "I'm leaving you both to your own devices now. Please look after her in my stead."

"Of course."

"In that case, I'll see you both soon."

---

"You're here both because the droplets of light guided you, yes?" Jacques said, gracefully wiping his mouth with a handkerchief. "Then let me get this straight— Aether, you are my next incarnation, which means you will be the next Jacques vessel of the Alberich clan."

"...Vessel?" Her brother asked as he munched on a cookie, seemingly confused. "What's that?"

"It means you are the next head of this clan, young Aether. Someday, you will have the same power as me, and all of what I have will be transferred to you."

"That sounds really big!" Aether exclaimed, "Right, Lumi?"

Despite her confusion about what they were discussing, she only nodded in lieu of pleasing her brother.

Jacques laughed as he crossed his fingers on the table. "Haha, it sure is. So what do you think of this new job?"

"As long as we have a roof over our heads, I don't mind! I want the best for Lumi, I don't want her to go hungry."

"Hmm, I see. This is easy, which is good…" The Lord paused for a moment, his sapphire eye gliding over her, making her sit ramrod straight in her chair; he smiled kindly, and she awkwardly smiled back. "You seem to care a lot about your sister, young Aether."

"Of course I am. Lumi is my only family, and I want everything for her," Aether said as he nibbled on his cookie. "I would do anything for her to have a better life ahead of her. That's how much she means to me."

"Hm, you're very mature for your age. You're not scared of her?"

He frowned at his cookie and then to the lord, "Why would I? Lumi is Lumi. She's my dear younger sister."

"Well, that's a given... but do you have any idea what people with red eyes meant?"

Aether stopped nibbling, and the question also made her stop eating as well. She may have been oblivious to what was going on at that moment, but the color of her eyes had always been such a sensitive subject to her that she couldn't help but cower in her seat.

What if the Lord of the mansion would kick them both because of her eyes?

What if her brother loses his favor for the Lord?

"They said it's the eyes of the devil," her brother mumbled, but she and the Lord heard it nonetheless.

And for some reason, it just made her sad.

"Not really," Jacques said with a sigh, which made her blink at her plate as she listened. "People just like to exaggerate things, seriously. Don't believe them." he shrugged, "Of course, humans would be wary over things beyond their scope of knowledge, and the subject about people with red eyes is no exception for that matter."

Out of reflex, she raised her gaze and met Jacques' kind ones. "That's not the eyes of the demon, so you don't have to be ashamed of the color of your eyes. Children of misfortune are incredibly strong. If you so as wished, you could trample over those puny humans who's besmirching your name. You don't have to be scared about it, I'm on your back. Just let loose."

"But that's bad…" Lumine said with a worried frown, "I can't do bad stuff."

"Well, you're still young, so you wouldn't completely understand how dire your circumstances are yet. No matter how much you insist you can't do 'bad stuff' because it is against your morals, however, in the end, you have no choice but to do so in order to protect yourself." Jacques explained.

He continued with a wave of his hand, "Now that you and your brother are about to be the new addition of this clan, it's also required for you to form a contract with a chain."

Aether parroted, "'Chain'…?"

"Yes. The Alberichs are required to pact with a chain. Just think of it as a rite of passage, once you have a chain with you— consider yourself one of the Alberichs. Easy, right?"

"Does that mean you have a 'chain' with you as well?"

"Well, I do. In fact, I have five of them."

"Five? That's a lot."

"Hahaha, it might not be obvious but I'm actually pretty strong, you see."

"Then...will we get ours soon?" Her brother asked with genuine curiosity, and the Alberich head only grinned amicably.

"Of course. Now that I think about it, we could push your first succession ceremony in a couple of days or in a week." He said, humming, but then he looked at her and then to her brother. "But since you're too young, I can't transfer all of my chains in your small body. What can you say about earning your first chain in that time as well?"

.

.

.

.

.

---

Her eyes couldn't stop looking at the copper-haired man as he laughed freely at her brother's retort.

They were simply at it again, debating what was the best material to read after discussing their own preferences with certain classical novels. Her brother hardly laughed, but the longer she stared at them like this, with Ajax's laughter reverberating throughout the place and Aether's occasional snorts and friendly smirks, she could tell that her brother was amused and enjoying their nonsensical banter in broad daylight.

Yesterday, after Jacques had left them alone in the tower, it felt as if an invisible barrier had appeared between them, and the mortification she felt from Jacques' stunt had also finally dawned on her, making her visibly awkward in Ajax's presence.

It was a good thing he didn't force her to talk about it, but his unusual silence that day really put her in a bad mood. They were still talking normally, but Lumine couldn't ignore the slight changes in his behavior. He was not only unusually quiet, but he also spaced out—a lot—that it was nearly impossible to converse with him properly.

And now, it was a bit annoying to watch him act as if he couldn't feel the distance growing between them. He seemed to gravitate towards her brother the whole day, and it somehow frustrated her to see how much he was also trying to avoid her gaze.

Just what the hell was wrong with him anyway? With all that hugging, begging, and stuff from yesterday, he has the audacity to behave differently and distance himself from her as if she had a plague on her person the whole time?

How preposterous. It only irritated her to the point where glaring daggers at the back of his head weren't enough to make her forget all of her frustrations about the man.

Was it because Jacques kissed her right in front of him? Now that she thought about it, he seemed like he was in a state of shock somehow…

…or was it just her imagination? He still looked normal, albeit a bit sedate in behavior.

But well, given how difficult it was to read Ajax at times, she couldn't be completely certain.

"Lumine!"

She instantly froze when Ajax finally called her name, and she swore she'd never turned her head so quickly before. "Yes?"

"You have to see this! Aether is going to dip in the lake!"

Dip?

"Dip?" Incredulous, Lumine could only raise her brow at the smiling Ajax and her silent brother who was taking off his boots next to the lake. "Wait, are you even serious, brother?"

"Yes. I've lost the bet to Ajax, so I have no choice but to do so." Aether explained as he successfully discarded his boots and began rolling his pants upwards next.

"But…but you're not going to swim butt-naked, are you?"

Ajax sniggered on the side, trying to control his laughs at bay.

"No," her brother deadpanned, as he threw a single glare at the laughing Krovopuskov. "Would you please stop laughing? I'm already doing it, so you don't have to make it any worse for me."

"Fufufu—hahaha—oh, y-yeah sorry." He said while he covered half of his face, suppressing his laugh as much as he could. "Y'know that I was only joking. You don't have to go that far."

"No, a bet is a bet and I lost, so I have to do it— fairly."

Ajax turned his head at her and murmured, "Is he really like this?"

"I already told you that brother is way too serious; I bet if you dare him to eat Wolfhook berries despite the fact that he despises such a fruit, he'll do it anyway because it would wound his pride if he objected," she only shrugged.

"He dislikes Wolfhook berries?" he inquired, surprised.

"With all his heart."

"But it's good. How could he abhor such a delectable fruit?"

"Right? I have no idea as well, but I knew he much preferred those ordinary yellow berries compared to them."

"Eh, in my opinion, Wolfhooks are a lot better…"

"I second that."

"You know I can hear you both, right?" Aether grumbled as he dipped himself in the lake.

"But it's true! Wolfhooks are better than those yellow berries!" Ajax reasoned.

"So what? Why don't you stuff yourself with those? I hope you choke on them though."

Lumine decided to join in the fun, dramatically sighing as she hunkered down next to the lake while looking at the visibly annoyed Aether. "That's really harsh of you, brother. You seem to have forgotten that I also love Wolfhook berries."

"Ugh, are you two conspiring against me?"

This time she laughed airily, accompanied by Ajax's amused chuckles. "Not at all, it's just that we couldn't figure out why you don't like such a good fruit. I remember we used to eat them when we're still children."

"I have my reasons... and that's a secret." Her brother murmured as he completely submerged himself in the lake and resurfaced after a minute. "I'm done. I'm completely soaked from head to toe, Ajax. Are you now satisfied?"

"I already told you that you do not have to go that far, right?"

"I see, then I'll just think of that as a 'yes'." Aether said, and the Krovopuskov scion could only smile wryly in response. "I'm coming out."

Plop

"Hm?" He blinked as he felt something land on top of his head, "?"

"..."

"..."

Aether looked at them, perplexed. "Why are you both looking at me like that?"

"Pfft—"

"What," He glared at the snickering Ajax.

Ajax turned away, but she and Aether could hear his suppressed chuckles. "..."

"...brother, don't move," she warned.

"Why?" He asked, frowning. "Are you trying to make fun of me again?"

A small chonky bird was innocently sitting on top of his head, looking like a ball of white yarn—pecking its small beak on his wet golden hair, but it seemed like her brother was completely unaware of its presence, which she couldn't help but laugh at.

"Nothing really," she said between laughs, "I just thought you looked like a big wet golden bird in gloomy clothes, and I thought it was cute."

Her brother sighed as he exited the water, still oblivious to the bird perched on top of his head. "I'll leave you both to change. Let's just meet inside the mansion later."

She snickered and waved, "Okay. See you later, brother."

And Aether had left them both completely, all alone.

So what now?

Her companion then asked her a few moments later. "Do you think we should follow Aether inside? It's getting cold here as well."

Lumine heard him alright, but she had to say that the tension between them was still there, lingering, along with the awkwardness that she almost hated hanging over them like a veil of doom.

But at least he's trying to talk to me again like what he always does, so I guess it's fine.

With her brows knitted in confusion, she found herself walking near the lake, seeing a familiar embroidered handkerchief that she had given Aether a long time ago, floating aimlessly in the water in circles.

"Wait," She gathered her heavy skirts on her sides as she waddled down the small slope of land. "I think my brother left something in the water."

"Left? What is it?"

"His handkerchief," she said, whereas she successfully made it on the bank and hoisted her skirts even higher— exposing her stockings in the view. "Let me fetch it first."

"Wait, Lumine, I think that's not a good idea." Ajax immediately followed her on the bank, "You'll get wet."

"Nah, it's fine," Lumine reassured nonchalantly as she finally dipped her feet into the water and began walking on the rocks; somewhat mindful of how slippery they were against her flat satin shoes. "I'll just change when we get ba—"

As if the heavens were mocking down at her because of her casual remark, she suddenly slipped on a slippery rock, twisting her ankle in the process and planked down ungracefully on the lake.

"Lumine!"

Good thing that the water was still shallow, but before she even had the mind to reach over the handkerchief that Aether had left— the impact of her fall had pushed the cloth further away due to the small waves.

"I warned you it wasn't a good idea! How could you be so careless, you're soaked!"

Ugh. Getting wet is the least of my problems for now, but my ankle is.

"Ah, the handkerchief is getting further away."

The copper-haired man quickly scrambled all the way to her, worried, as he pulled her up effortlessly on the rocks. "You don't have to do things on your own; just ask me to get it for you."

She almost wanted to smile at his remark. Oddly enough, she felt relieved at being chastised in this manner. It meant that despite everything, he still cared about her well-being. "Ajax, I said the handkerchief is getting further away."

"Stay here," he ordered curtly, "Let me get it. It's still not far."

She waited a few seconds as he retrieved the cloth, and when he returned with the wet handkerchief in his hand, he immediately went out to check all over her, his eyes scanning for any wounds on her body. "Are you hurt?"

She shook her head, "I think I twisted my ankle."

He sighed almost exasperatedly, "Good grief, I'll carry you."

"N-no, I'm fine. I think I can manage to walk—"

"No," He stopped her by the wrist and pulled, her eyes automatically landing on his face, surprised. "I'll carry you all the way back to the mansion."

"But—"

"Lumine, don't refute me," Ajax said more seriously this time, and she couldn't stop the traitorous light blush from appearing on her face as she saw how close their faces were. "Please."

She nodded meekly and looked down, "Fine."

"If you excuse me.."

"..!" She quickly grabbed onto him when he suddenly hoisted her in a bridal carry and effortlessly made his way out of the water while carrying her in his arms. Lumine was rendered speechless during the carry, oddly comforted by his warmth and closeness. She could even feel the mellow beat of his heart, somewhat in sync with hers, beating in unison as one; as if their hearts had their own musical arrangement—like a pair of singers performing a melodious duet in a song.

"Does your ankle hurt?"

"A bit, but I think it will be fine. So don't worry too much."

"I see…"

Silence.

"Lumine, about you and Jacques.."

Will he ask her about what happened in the tower the day before?

"..."

Will he?

"..."

And she waited, waited, and waited for him to continue but he went completely mute for a full minute as if his mind was preoccupied with something. As she watched him blanked out, Lumine felt mildly annoyed for some reason and tugged on his ascot to get back his attention (in which she kinda underestimated her own strength and somehow tugged a bit harder, but he seemed totally out to even notice).

As expected, the Krovopuskov scion looked at her with surprise, their faces were still close and she could clearly see every change in his expression. From surprise to confusion, from confusion to embarrassment and then back to his usual sedate expression. It was something that Lumine inwardly enjoyed seeing at his face— witnessing every change, even his eyes.

"Ajax?"

"That was being rude of me," Ajax said with a shake of his head. "Please forget it, it was nothing."

So in the end, he decided not to push himself to ask, huh?

It just made her feel disheartened in some way, and a bit saddened as well for not being able to explain herself.

I guess it's not really that important. It's not like he cared about it.

"I'm sure Jacques will be disappointed in me. You sprained your ankle in my presence, and I didn't even manage to prevent it. I'm sorry."

She snorted, "Stupid, why are you apologizing? It's my fault to begin with. Stop being so foolish."

"Haha, yes yes." He laughed sheepishly, making her pout.

Her complicated feelings for the man began to resurface once more, their awkwardness with each other had faded, and the intimacy she felt at that moment only filled her with stark nostalgia. She remembered being this close to Ajax when she first met him, used to huddle with him inside a rag blanket, used to sleep against his chest with his arms around her to ward off coldness against the chilly weather.

Ajax had always comforted her in some ways that she barely understood herself, and there was something about his presence that drew her to him like a moth to a flame.

"Ajax."

"Yes, Lumine?"

Even the sound of her name in his lips made her giddy and feel a lot of things which was so overwhelming and frustrating that she couldn't even fathom how the simple notion made her face feel so warm.

Lumine couldn't stop herself from leaning forward, her arms securely wrapped around him, her face on the crook of his neck, slowly breathing him in. Closure, she craved more closure.

(She also reasoned that deceiving herself even further had proven to be problematic; who knows, maybe admitting it to herself would finally bring her some inner relief—

—but my, how utterly wrong she was.)

Again, her keen olfactory senses detected that familiar whiff of freesias on his neck, which had been awfully tampered by his natural damask rose-like scent—but it was still there, completely existing. Lumine was too mentally drained to think about it again, but it had been far too long since she had felt so defeated in her entire life.

She liked Ajax. She wanted Ajax, all of him, but she knew she couldn't have him all to herself. It was too risky, that for her own opinion, it felt like a double-edged sword.

She was dying. She couldn't possibly be more self-centered, she reasoned. Perhaps it was better that way; at least he could be happy with someone who was still alive and breathing, as opposed to her, who has a life with a fickle deadline and could die at any time.

Her chest felt uncomfortably tight, but she knew she had to push through in order to move on.

"Ajax…" she murmured tiredly, "I feel so cold."

Ajax came to a halt, seemingly concerned, as he tried to look at her in his arms. "Sorry, but do you want to use my coat? It was a bit wet on the ends, but it should at least cover your shoulders."

Lumine shook her head and only clung to him even more, arms tight around him with her face completely buried on his neck, and no longer gave a damn about the freesia scent.

I'm tired, very much so.

"No, this is already fine. I just need you…close to me," she said in a whisper, "Just don't let me go."

"..." He was simply rendered speechless but he nodded nonetheless. Ajax drew her in more closer, to the point where it felt like a tight embrace, so very warm and oddly comforting.

Somehow, her months of mental exhaustion finally caught up with her, and her eyes couldn't take it any longer, as they just went close on their own.

Lumine suddenly fell asleep in his arms.

---

.

.

.

.

.

Lumine couldn't explain the inward excitement as she ran all over the Alberich mansion's wide corridor. It was her very first jaunt in her new home and everything was just too big and grand that she couldn't help but gush and marvel at every place her eyes could spot upon; from the large paintings, shiny chandeliers and soft red carpets— all of it were just so majestic and expensive that she couldn't stop herself from admiring them openly.

However, her moment of exhilaration was immediately cut to short when a low croak greeted her ears, a voice so raspy and full of malice, with obvious disgust dripping at every word enunciated.

"The child of misfortune….is an abomination. Why...is the child of misfortune here?" said by an unknown person heavily enshrouded with the shadows at a corner of the corridor, "We must cast her back…into the Abyss from whence she came!"

"..." Lumine stopped on her tracks and wordlessly stared at the unknown figure, until they slowly stepped out from the shadows— revealing a scary looking old woman wearing a familiar robe reminiscent of the Lord's servants.

"Lumi, why did you stopped?" Her brother's voice had snapped her out of her stupor in the distance, "We're getting more ahead of you. Come, hurry up!"

"But…" She floundered for an answer, her gaze switching between her brother and the unknown old woman. "Someone is here…"

After a few moments, Jacques seemed to notice her confusion and discomfort as he found himself marching back all the way to her with her brother in tow.

"Oh look at that," He doesn't seem surprised to see the old woman, she noticed. "it's you, grandmother. These two have just joined the Alberich household, so please don't scare them." he said as he grabbed her hand along with her brother's.

"Is this boy…the new vessel?"

"Ah yes, he is. We'll begin the preparations to transfer Alatus soon. At that time, he will be introduced to everyone as the next Jacques." He patted Aether's head, "After Alatus will come Menogias, then Bonanus… I have to say it will take some time to transfer all five of them."

The scary old woman wouldn't stop eyeing her intently under the cloak that she couldn't stop herself from moving closer to the Alberich head to the point of clinging on his clothes.

Sensing her discomfort once again, Jacques only pulled her closer to him by wrapping his arm around her and added. "So it's still a bit early for her to be cast anywhere."

Unruffled, the said 'grandmother' continued to stare unabashedly much to her greatest discomfort. "..."

He gently began to nudge both of them forward and started grabbing both of their hands once again, "Heh. After all, ten or twenty years is just a moment for you, isn't it? So wait just a little longer, grandmother."

And they just left the old woman.

"Jacques…" She started while following his steps, "who was that old grandma? Is she an Alberich too?"

"Lumi, that's being rude, you're supposed to call him 'master'." Her brother interjected but left ignored anyways.

"She's an Alberich, but a special case," he replied in a flippant manner, almost bored. "Let's just say that she plays a slightly different role."

"What kind?"

"Hmm, let me see.." Jacques pulled both of them as they met an intersection, "The task of the Alberichs is to ensure that the power of the Abyss doesn't interfere too much in this world. That old woman is Gold, The Lurking Eyes; her job is to keep an eye on the Alberichs, and on Jacques in particular."

"On you, Master? But why?" Her brother asked quizzically.

He shrugged, "Who knows? Because that's the way it's supposed to be?" and continued, "Not even all the previous Jacques know how long that woman has been around. No one even knows where in the mansion she spends her time. All we know is that she is an elusive advisor that likes to appear in unexpected places at unexpected times."

"..."

"..."

"Haha, don't worry! It's useless to ask someone who already exists why they do. You'd do better to ask yourself what you want to do about it." He smirked to himself, "Otherwise, you have to accept things as they are."

Lumine squeezed Jacques' hand out of reflex, "She said you should throw me back where I came from…" she murmured, "Am I going to be thrown away somewhere?"

He paused for a moment, but he replied nonetheless. "Perhaps."

"Why? Why would you do that to me?"

"Because you're the child of misfortune."

She frowned, "I know, I am. But I still don't understand.."

"Well, I thought you might not."

She gripped his hand a bit tighter this time and asked, "…what's going to happen to me then?"

Silence.

Tap tap tap

The sound of their footsteps hitting the ground was the only thing that she could hear at that moment, along with their soft breaths, but then…

"That's simple," he finally answered and Lumine couldn't stop herself from looking at his smiling face.

"..."

"You will die."

---

"What is this? You look so out of yourself. You look so lost."

She slowly turned her head in the direction of the voice, and was met by a visibly intrigued Alberich head.

"...Jacques.." she murmured.

"You were having a bad nightmare there, weren't you?" He hummed as he trotted all the way to her bed, and when he got close, he swiped her sweaty bangs out of her face. "I would really like to know what you were dreaming about…that made you shake like that in your sleep."

"...And you look so pretty worn out."

"What kind of answer is that?" He said with a pout, plopping himself next to her on her bed. "You also called someone's name."

Someone's name? She couldn't even guess whose name that she uttered in her sleep, other than her brother's or Jacques'. Her dreams were always about them…

"In my sleep?" she blinked in confusion, "Was it Aether's?"

Jacques only stared at her for a few seconds, eerily so, that it almost felt like her tiny hairs had stood by its mere intensity. "I wonder."

….or not?

"?"

"Hm, and here I thought seeing your beloved friend again after a month would brighten your mood, but it seems like you're getting worse than I thought."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you look exactly just like me, pretty worn out as well, you see."

She blinked, perplexed. "Am I?"

"You do, and it makes me very curious as to why," He leaned forward to her and murmured, "Say... It's because of him, isn't it?"

"Of course not," She quickly denied as she looked down, sighing. "Stop spouting unnecessary things, Jacques."

"Spouting unnecessary things? Do I have to remind you that I caught both of you embracing the other day?" Lumine froze at that simple statement and he continued, "I have to say it was a bit intimate, it almost made me jealous in some way."

"Jealous, huh." She smirked in his way, and said. "Now it finally made sense why you just boldly kissed me right in front of his face. You were jealous."

He smirked back in return, and she had to say he looked so attractive in that manner when he tilted his head to the side with a shrewd look plastered on his face. "What if I do?"

"Then I guess, you do."

"Hey, I'm trying to flirt with you here. Could you just flirt back with me or something? You're dampening my poor besotted soul."

"With your annoying habit of mentioning Ajax's name in every statement you can conjure through mouth, it just kills the mood."

"My, my..." Jacques began to laugh, "You really sound defensive there; does talking about him really affect you that much?"

"Again with these nonsense, Jacques. I already told you that you shouldn't talk about unnecessary things with me—"

"No," he quickly interjected, his tone serious. "So, are you telling me that his existence is completely unnecessary to you?"

"I never said that."

"Of course, you wouldn't think of him in that way because he's very special to you."

"Jacques, you're starting to get so annoying…"

"Am I?" He blinked for a moment, contemplating. "But I don't think I am; it's just you being so defensive, trying so hard, albeit ineffectively, to deflect things."

"..." She couldn't help but fist the bedsheets with her hands.

"Even your eyes looked so empty just now," Jacques murmured, and her eyes widened slightly in surprise. "I have to say, I don't like seeing them in you, but it just happened, and it was all because of him, as expected. It was always about him, don't you think?"

"...Tell me Jacques," she clenched her fists as she looked at him, "what really brings you here?"

"Trying to change topics now, aren't we?"

She shook her head and replied, "I'm serious. Why are you here?"

He sighed, "Now that you've asked about it, I suppose I should tell you, huh?"

"..."

"Well, I won't deny it… but you're right. This body is about to reach its limit soon."

Reach its limit soon…

"Rejoice, Lumine!" Jacques exclaimed, almost startling her with the sound of his hand clapping, "Three months from now, I will transfer the last remaining chain Bosacius in my body to Aether."

Then that means….

"And by the end of the ceremony, your brother will be the next Jacques…"

…I…

"...and you will finally leave this world," He said with a smile and his words felt like a final nail to her coffin, especially his last remark. "For good."

…will leave sooner than I thought.

She was rendered speechless for a few moments before slowly smiling, "I see."

"Mon lapin, do you still remember what we've talked about when you were a teenager?"

"There's a lot of them, be specific."

"Well…"

"..." As she waited for his response, she went blank for a moment, as an old memory from before began to resurface once more.

"To be honest… I shouldn't even have told you any of this." Jacques said with a hum, but then he tilted her chin upwards to look at her face. "Hey Lumine, since you're going to die anyway…"

"..."

"Would you like to help me with my experiment?"

Jacques said, "It has to do with the experiment I've told you about."

She couldn't even find it in herself to be surprised anymore, not when she was fully subjected to her fate from a long time ago.

"Say Lumine, how about we put the experiment into motion? Are you still up for the deed?" He offered, crossing his fingers on his lap, and continued, "You know I wouldn't force you to do something you won't like, but this is a big opportunity for the Core to finally have its own vessel in the future if it succeeds."

That's true, she inwardly noted to herself as she remembered about the sentient Core that she befriended in the Abyss. A being that almost looked incorporeal, a simple orb of light floating in the bowels of depths.

Her very first friend, who always listened to her, even if their conversations were completely one-sided at that time.

"...what kind of experiment?" Lumine asked him out of pure curiosity.

"An experiment to find a way to allow people to handle all the power of the Abyss."

"That's impossible… Didn't you say that the Abyss is the beginning of all things…like a blueprint for the world…and can be thought of almost like a god?"

"Correct," He said with an amused smile, "But I'm not saying people can become god. What I'm trying to find out is, if we provide the Core of the Abyss with a suitable vessel."

Lumine could only watch him with her brows furrowed, listening.

He continued, "It may be possible to control the power of the Abyss through such a vessel—"

She could hear the constant ticking of the clock in the background as she closed her eyes for a moment to ruminate.

Lumine exactly knew what would be the next words to come next.

"Will you let me impregnate you?" He murmured.

"—But only you will be bound by chains as punishment for your sins… The child you're carrying won't be affected." He said with a wave of his hand, "Lumine, you will be cast into the Abyss. Even if your body were to dissolve in those dark depths, your child may continue to live in the womb of the Abyss, cradled in darkness."

"But do you think the Core of the Abyss…." She trailed for a moment, "...would really find the child? Does that mean that, if the Core were to find a vessel…"

Jacques could only watch her in silence.

"...The Will of the Abyss wouldn't have to be all alone anymore?"

He smiled, "Certainly."

Three months. She only had three months left.

Tick tick tick

Aether will be the next Jacques, and she will be cast into the Abyss afterwards.

She will die for good. Her soul will be excluded from the Rule of One Hundred Cycles. She will be completely erased from the face of the earth.

Tick tick tick

And feelings shouldn't matter as well.

Lumine finally opened her eyes as she regarded him, her face almost blank, indifferent. "Let's do it."

Aside from the Core and her brother, nothing would matter much to her.

For the Core to have a vessel…

(She won't think of Ajax that day as well, she swore to herself not to.)

Jacques gently smiled as he held her face tenderly with his hands, and Lumine could only lean forward to feel his touch. "My good girl."

Then he kissed her passionately on the lips, which she accepted wholeheartedly in a beat, and he swiftly undid the ribbons behind her dress, leaving her completely bare in front of him as he successfully took it off of her.